Jump to content
Teagan KGB

TransWhatevers of AVEN

Recommended Posts

Janus DarkFox

I have a hunch that my NHS process will do everything to disprove my dysphoria and blame something else on something as simple as changing diet and exercise.  2 months to go to my gender dysphoria and memory test, please just don’t blame it on any existing hormonal problem or dementia.

 

Dementia is scary at my young age, thanks doc for wanting to rule it out, least the process be thorough and long ‚̧ԳŹ¬†

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Celyn
1 hour ago, Janus DarkFox said:

blame something else on something as simple as changing diet and exercise.

Yep, medicine as an industry would much rather blame the patient, hand-wave and make them go away than invest time in continuity of care and getting to the root of their problems.

  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
ColeHW34

(Hugs for everyone)

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Destan

(please tag me instead)

So I've this school friend who's the first person ever to keep using my preferred pronouns right in real life.

It really lightens my days at school whenever I notice it. I can't remember if she did it from the start, probably not but the first time I heard it, I thought it was just my imagination. However, this week I tried to pay attention to that and I'm sure of it now. Today after school, she said on the phone she was waiting with a classmate (me) at his (my) bus stop. It makes me happy honestly.

Despite she most-likely knowing I'm not a guy, everyone else dispronouncing me, seeing me go to the ... restroom and telling her about the getting-laughed-at-incident there once. You'd think by then she'll dispronouns me like the others but she doesn't. I never even came out to her, told her my preferences or corrected her.

Up till now, this school friend never outright called me a guy or corrected others, she just uses male pronouns on me by herself.

She may not noticed it but that means a lot to me and we've only been friends for less than 2 months now.

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Karst
On 10/23/2019 at 10:23 AM, Janus DarkFox said:

I have a hunch that my NHS process will do everything to disprove my dysphoria and blame something else on something as simple as changing diet and exercise.  2 months to go to my gender dysphoria and memory test, please just don’t blame it on any existing hormonal problem or dementia.

 

Dementia is scary at my young age, thanks doc for wanting to rule it out, least the process be thorough and long ‚̧ԳŹ¬†

Doctors are like tech-support workers- they always try to make sure that the problem isn't something you can fix on your own before they go in to deal with it.  Of course, that means that when the problem really is out of your hands, you have to go through a bit of "have you tried X?" before they help you.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lonemathsytoothbrushthief

@Destan that's really great ^_^ after I explained my pronouns and that I'm ok with he/him too, that's how my friend in our research group refers to me. I hope you continue to find good people from now on ‚̧ԳŹ

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
PoeciMeta

I'm currently figuring out what I want transition-wise, and I found myself wondering how much of my downstairs I actually want to keep. I'm pretty sure about the hysto, but I can't find any detailed or reliable info concerning the external parts, with it being often considered mutilation... this might turn into a full-blown thread, but does anyone know something aout this? 

I know, some part of me thinks I'll learn what's relevant in due time, ie when I can actually access such surgeries. But when that time comes, I'll probably be impatient to get stuff done quick, and I certainly don't want to rush into things. So, if I can get some pros and cons to weigh sooner than that, it's probably better. Please? :3

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lonemathsytoothbrushthief
On 10/28/2019 at 10:51 PM, Poe's Creep Meta said:

I'm currently figuring out what I want transition-wise, and I found myself wondering how much of my downstairs I actually want to keep. I'm pretty sure about the hysto, but I can't find any detailed or reliable info concerning the external parts, with it being often considered mutilation... this might turn into a full-blown thread, but does anyone know something aout this? 

I know, some part of me thinks I'll learn what's relevant in due time, ie when I can actually access such surgeries. But when that time comes, I'll probably be impatient to get stuff done quick, and I certainly don't want to rush into things. So, if I can get some pros and cons to weigh sooner than that, it's probably better. Please? :3

I'd assume having bottom surgery without the goal being binary is risky? Also if it's not forcibly done it wouldn't be mutilation - if it's something you want then nothing wrong with that!

 

But I'm boring I just want a penis - I think?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
PoeciMeta
38 minutes ago, Lonemathsytoothbrushthief said:

I'd assume having bottom surgery without the goal being binary is risky? Also if it's not forcibly done it wouldn't be mutilation - if it's something you want then nothing wrong with that!

 

But I'm boring I just want a penis - I think?

I guess it is, since I want to remove a lot more things than in 'binary' bottom surgery. Thing is, genitalia in general disgust me, but while it's possible for trans AFABs to get rid of their internal things, I only could find stuff on mutilation while researching external stuff removal. ''End female circumcision'', that stuff. I'd just like to get documentation on proper surgical options to think about it in a less biased way, because I'm¬†not female... ūüėē

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lonemathsytoothbrushthief
24 minutes ago, Poe's Creep Meta said:

I guess it is, since I want to remove a lot more things than in 'binary' bottom surgery. Thing is, genitalia in general disgust me, but while it's possible for trans AFABs to get rid of their internal things, I only could find stuff on mutilation while researching external stuff removal. ''End female circumcision'', that stuff. I'd just like to get documentation on proper surgical options to think about it in a less biased way, because I'm¬†not female... ūüėē

Oh no those dysphoria feels ūüėē well a page on what a phalloplasty consists of gave me this list of surgeries(spoilered because yeah genitals):

Spoiler

a hysterectomy, during which doctors remove the uterus

an oophorectomy to remove the ovaries

a vaginectomy or vaginal mucosal ablation to remove or partially remove the vagina

a scrotectomy to turn the labia majora into a scrotum, either with or without testicular implants(I included it because there's not a lot else about labia?)

The website: https://www.healthline.com/health/transgender/phalloplasty#procedure

I'm not a doctor but this gives an idea of surgeries you could look into, I think?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
nerdperson777
On 10/28/2019 at 3:51 PM, Poe's Creep Meta said:

I'm currently figuring out what I want transition-wise, and I found myself wondering how much of my downstairs I actually want to keep. I'm pretty sure about the hysto, but I can't find any detailed or reliable info concerning the external parts, with it being often considered mutilation... this might turn into a full-blown thread, but does anyone know something aout this? 

I know, some part of me thinks I'll learn what's relevant in due time, ie when I can actually access such surgeries. But when that time comes, I'll probably be impatient to get stuff done quick, and I certainly don't want to rush into things. So, if I can get some pros and cons to weigh sooner than that, it's probably better. Please? :3

I agree on it being hard to figure out.  I guess I might still only be knowledgeable on binary genitals.  I'm not dysphoric about my external stuff because something sticks out or it doesn't.  Hysterectomy is just so I'll never have periods again, even if I lower my dose of T.

 

The only thing I can think of atm is that for AMAB people is that there is nullification surgery or nullo, or something.  Perhaps you can search for something with nullification in it.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
PoeciMeta
8 hours ago, nerdperson777 said:

The only thing I can think of atm is that for AMAB people is that there is nullification surgery or nullo, or something.  Perhaps you can search for something with nullification in it.

I'm trying to... so far I haven't found real surgical options for nonbinary AFABs, I only get either male nullification or female ritual mutilation... urgh. The interesting page titles link me back to AVEN, too... ^^'

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
JON
On 10/31/2019 at 11:36 AM, PoeciMeta said:

I'm trying to... so far I haven't found real surgical options for nonbinary AFABs, I only get either male nullification or female ritual mutilation... urgh. The interesting page titles link me back to AVEN, too... ^^'

It's something that I also have interest in(from the AMAB-side).

Feel free to find my post and see what I have found of options for AFAB.

I  myself is also having warm feelings for the term neutrois.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
PoeciMeta
11 hours ago, JON said:

It's something that I also have interest in(from the AMAB-side).

Feel free to find my post and see what I have found of options for AFAB.

I  myself is also having warm feelings for the term neutrois.

Glad to see someone relate! Uh, find your post where though, exactly ? 

 

I too like the word neutrois, it sounds cool! I don't really identify with it, I'm more agender (less 'neutral' and more 'NOT', if that makes sense).

I think I remember seeing the term neutrois used not as a gender, but as a body type. As in, while a trans man would transition towards a male body, a non-binary person could transition towards a neutrois body... it kind of makes sense, I like this use. It's true that there is no consensual word to describe a body devoid of sex characteristics (nevermind the confusion with intersex)... it would at least provide an answer for when some people ask ''But what are you physically?"

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Janus DarkFox

Cross posted from a ‚ÄúAsk Transgender‚ÄĚ post that was removed by moderators for trolling, inspired by a negative meme trend against intersex trans, spoilered as NSFW, Childhood Medical Sexual Trauma and bodily functions/descriptions of genital configuration.

Spoiler

A Post inspired by memes. I'm a Intersex Non-Binary Agender Trans Fem, I feel out of place..

 

I was born with Hypospadias, such condition is or was considered as a mild Intersex condition.  This condition meant the urethra opening placed anywhere else along the penal shaft, scrotum or  anus, or even multiple openings.  The condition also came bundled with Chordee, unintended testis, tight foreskin, smaller penis, scrotum sack and later in life, delayed puberty.  The opening in my case placed at about just under the head.

 

I never had a problem, other than urine can be passed in a forking direction or sprays with no consistent stream standing up getting toilet trained, that has never changed even after repair.  It's assumed by parents and doctors that's a serious problem and a significant one by puberty, especially erections and sexual performance/pleasure, prevent problems where a problem never existed yet at that age.  

 

This was 1991, the procedure was to close the urethra, open and graft a new one at the tip, straighten the bend in the penis and a Circumcision.  It's never been perfect even so the repair is consider a success.  I still sit and prefer to sit to urinate even before considering myself as trans.  Every 2 years sine until age 21, development was check for which I was always behind by other boys often by a few several years by penis size, testis size and lack of presence of pubic hair.  It's noted I never had a satisfactory orgasm, pleasure, uncomfortable orgasm/ejaculation, effectively making me functionally Asexual, long before discovering my actual Asexuality, until discovering a Female pattern of pleasure around the perineum and switching to a different method of masturbation to achieve such feminine pleasure, which is now the preferred habit, even if its rare, having whats known as a consistently low libido for most men or women.  Childhood never seemed particularly gendered to me... Though I never possessed any level of social desire, its an Autism thing probably.

 

This was repaired at age 4 by a specialist and not locally many miles away.  Having it done at 4 is now known to have a serious psycho-sexual developmental impact, this age is critical for body exploration, I have also received an apology from doctors.  Having that violated is on par with some forms of sexual abuse now.  It's not now an automatic fix like it once is, being unable to stand and piss is not a medical problem anymore.

 

Later in my psychological development, grand age of 28, I discovered the female within myself, body explored centered around feminine pleasure and so on.  Later I discovered I'd prefer to be a girl, despite a gender being considered Agendered.  My body shape neither consists of male or female significance other than body hair spread, blood works has always been considered normal sexual hormone levels for a man.  The spread of muscle and fat never consisted significantly as male or female and preferred the body to be left alone for the most part.  Part of this was discovered coming down from being morbidly obese, 17st to 9.5st roughly, never able to gain muscle despite the years of male centered exercise to gain muscle.  If connected, my male centered diet, considered of a higher protein necessary for muscle mass caused an anemia with high protein in the blood.  This is more likely to do with having a double fatty liver disease, part due to weight problems in past less to do with having the wrong diet for  me sex, wherever the sex may lie. 

 

That is until becoming more curious with clothing for girls, preferring a vagina, the motions of Transexuality in full swing so i thought... There's little to dysphoria apart from the curiosity and already adapting everything i can do.  The body looks female to me.  I have a gender dysphoria test coming up December, this is after several years of therapy already through a chronic depression treatment and a co-morbid Tourettes-Aspergers diagnosis.  The gender has been regularly invalidated at every stage, blaming the weight, a thyroid problem as a cause of a femininization which i don't have, the liver disease which is cured, depression, manic psychotic break, delusions of grandeur, autism, the 'medical abuse' being Asexual... and a family that rather be dead than support a transition.  Least professionals are thorough in ruling out everything else.

 

This medical history means no level of surgery will ever be possible and I'd like to see what T blockers will do further to experience a more neutral body and an eventual partial femininization, further than what I do now.  I'm like an MtNtF, fully wanting or am gender expressing as Female.  Genitals which I think should of been Female to begin with, an Intersex condition that should of been repaired the other way.  Can't blame the doctors though, they'd have went the same direction in a fix now if I needed it repaired, least I would have had an informed choice as an adult now.

 

A uhh... rant triggered by memes and trans jokes on Intersex Trans stuff... not sure where if any question lies...

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
JON
On 10/31/2019 at 11:36 AM, PoeciMeta said:

I'm trying to... so far I haven't found real surgical options for nonbinary AFABs, I only get either male nullification or female ritual mutilation... urgh. The interesting page titles link me back to AVEN, too... ^^'

This is the thread is was refering to:

And this is what wrote:

Spoiler

Step 1:
Sterilization, but still able to have sex :
Male : Orchiectomy+sack
Female : Oophorectomy(ovaries) Hysterectomy(uterus)
Step 2 :
Topsurgery, making both genders look same at the top.Still able to have sex.
Male : Nipple removal(to avoid breast to develope)
Females : Mastectomy.
Step 3 :
Bottomsurgery, sex is difficult, but can be done.
Male : Penectomy
Female : Radical vaginectomy

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ms. Carolynne

I have a choker coming in the mail tomorrow and I'm excited, but also kind of nervous. I'm probably going to catch some flak if I'm caught with it. I'll probably just wear it in my room or whatever, and hopefully nobody gets up in my business over it :unsure:

 

On a funny note, Amazon started recommending me cat ears after I bought it.

  • Like 6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Bloc
32 minutes ago, Ms. Carolynne said:

On a funny note, Amazon started recommending me cat ears after I bought it.

Didn't get these, I am probably not trans enough ;). I only get dress ads when browsing  on university computers.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Janus DarkFox

What I like to keenly remember, just like feeling nothing ace enough‚Äô there‚Äôs never any real definition of ‚Äėenough‚Äô. ¬†Being trans and being ace is just what they are and who you are :cake:

  • Like 8

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Destan

There's this tall guy at my school, he has long hair and sometimes he wears high heels to school or any other considered 'feminine' jewelry or top clothing.

At the beginning of school year, I was surprised like is he really wearing what I think he's wearing?

I'm glad to see him not giving a crap while proudly rocking in what he wears.

Unlike me, I hope he hasn't and doesn't get laughed at and/of get crap from people at school. Though not that I've ever seen anyone do that to him up 'till now.

(At my school, all students from 5th year and above are allowed to spend their breaks in the hallways so I see him around quite often)

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
PoeciMeta

You know these childish nicknames some grandmas keep using, and which you can't help but find sweet even if they're a big misgendering? It's a bit saddening. I have this grandma who keeps calling me ''little doe'' no matter how old or how boyish I get. I'm not sure I'd want to correct her on that. Yeah I know, it's a bit silly of me, but still. 

  • Like 6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Celyn
On 11/17/2019 at 5:32 PM, PoeciMeta said:

You know these childish nicknames some grandmas keep using, and which you can't help but find sweet even if they're a big misgendering?

YES I DO!

Even though the ones I get are usually just "Good girl" (often preceeded by something like "You're a strong young lad, lift this for me").

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Karst
43 minutes ago, Celyn said:

YES I DO!

Even though the ones I get are usually just "Good girl" (often preceeded by something like "You're a strong young lad, lift this for me").

That's incredibly wholesome.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Celyn
6 minutes ago, Iridium said:

That's incredibly wholesome.

My family is as confused about my gender as I am and that's honestly all I could ask for.

  • Like 8

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Janus DarkFox
16 hours ago, Celyn said:

My family is as confused about my gender as I am and that's honestly all I could ask for.

I think my family have trouble seeing anything else other than the two ends of the gender binary.  And that’s fine for me.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
nerdperson777
On 11/17/2019 at 9:32 AM, PoeciMeta said:

You know these childish nicknames some grandmas keep using, and which you can't help but find sweet even if they're a big misgendering? It's a bit saddening. I have this grandma who keeps calling me ''little doe'' no matter how old or how boyish I get. I'm not sure I'd want to correct her on that. Yeah I know, it's a bit silly of me, but still. 

I'm the youngest in my generation on both sides of my family.  Some of my relatives still call me BB for baby even though the next generation has already started.  I actually do have some nieces and nephews that are older than me because someone in my generation had a kid at 18.

 

On 11/19/2019 at 3:35 AM, Janus DarkFox said:

I think my family have trouble seeing anything else other than the two ends of the gender binary.  And that’s fine for me.

I tell my mom that I feel 70% male, and I think she takes that as I'm still female in a way which is probably why she refuses to see me as anything but.  The past week she called me she but switched to he after, so I'm not sure if she's actually trying again now.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lonemathsytoothbrushthief
On 11/8/2019 at 2:08 PM, Ms. Carolynne said:

I have a choker coming in the mail tomorrow and I'm excited, but also kind of nervous. I'm probably going to catch some flak if I'm caught with it. I'll probably just wear it in my room or whatever, and hopefully nobody gets up in my business over it :unsure:

 

On a funny note, Amazon started recommending me cat ears after I bought it.

I hope you manage to have the safe, enjoyable and gender affirming time you deserve ^_^

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lonemathsytoothbrushthief

I've started going back to girl clothes, some heels, nail varnish and make up(though all very basic) for fun and I still honestly don't know how much of a risk this is on the NHS. When I see trans guys commenting about being judged for wearing bright colours and remember that at vaaaaaarious times I've wanted pretty much all of HRT, top surgery, metoidioplasty(hell no to phalloplasty because I'm already playing with fire seeing as surgery involves anaesthesia which involves seeing if what they say about redheads is true) and some way to stop shark weeks, I feel like I'm gonna get the same judgement.

 

I don't know how much I want to pass as a guy. This whole process is so tiring and full of doubt but I sure as hell didn't come out to wear jeans, converses, black and the same haircut for the rest of my life. Dysphoria also wouldn't make me take this stuff off if I was already on T and feeling better about my face/muscle and fat distribution/all the rest of the body stuff.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Bloc
51 minutes ago, Lonemathsytoothbrushthief said:

I've started going back to girl clothes, some heels, nail varnish and make up(though all very basic) for fun and I still honestly don't know how much of a risk this is on the NHS.

Does the NHS hire detectives to spy on trans patients? In my naivety I would just not wear all these when you have an appointment there and the rest is not their f*cking business.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...