Celyn: The Lutening Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 9 hours ago, anisotrophic said: I think it should be a very normal thing to be asking about surgery for anyone on hormone therapy for gender affirmation. (Sorry I can't tell if you're talking about T or birth control.) I'm on progesterone for gender affirmation purposes. 6 hours ago, nerdperson777 said: I started thinking about that "between my legs", tail is third/fourth sex, haha. Perfect. Ties in with "Your gender is whatever your phone suggests after "I am a..." " and mine is "Coward". 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nerdperson777 Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 51 minutes ago, Celyn said: Perfect. Ties in with "Your gender is whatever your phone suggests after "I am a..." " and mine is "Coward". I don't think I can do this right now because my phone died earlier in the month, meaning I have to make a new library of suggested words again on my new phone. The only nouns I got were guy and girl, so may have to wait a little longer. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PoeciMeta Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 10 hours ago, Celyn said: Perfect. Ties in with "Your gender is whatever your phone suggests after "I am a..." " and mine is "Coward". I get either ''I am a man'' or ''I am a woman'' depending on the language I use... oops... My autocorrect is a slow learner apparently ¯\ _(ツ)_/¯ 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ColeHW34 Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 10 hours ago, Celyn said: Perfect. Ties in with "Your gender is whatever your phone suggests after "I am a..." " and mine is "Coward". I am a (gets 3 choices) man, woman, or while. Not sure where the hell "while" came from though. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 10 hours ago, Celyn said: Ties in with "Your gender is whatever your phone suggests after "I am a..." " and mine is "Coward". At the moment, I am, apparently, a "medieval biscuit." 8 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PoeciMeta Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 Oh yeah I forgot I'm also a bit concerned. And oh yes you are @CustardCream XD 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ColeHW34 Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 28 minutes ago, CustardCream said: At the moment, I am, apparently, a "medieval biscuit." Golden. Your keyboard is weirdly funny. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 1 hour ago, PoeciMeta said: Oh yeah I forgot I'm also a bit concerned. And oh yes you are @CustardCream XD I so am. I'm crafting a medieval costume for a festival, so it's not a surprise! 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ColeHW34 Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 16 minutes ago, CustardCream said: What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. (Hugs) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 2 minutes ago, Member114264 said: (Hugs) Thank you. Husband is reacting to me having decided to take a day out on Sunday with a bunch of fellow aces by choosing to take an old friend (a single, cishet sexual woman) out to dinner the same evening. He has been pretty clear about his intentions. Yeah, it hurts. More than I can bear to say. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Captain_Tass Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 27 minutes ago, CustardCream said: What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. *big hug* The past half hour I had another gender identity crisis, for an unknown reason, and I ended up remembering that I exist in a weird state of androgynous neutrality and agender fits me well enough. I pulled through though, and I believe that you can do so too! Remember, bad times are just times that just so happen to be bad, and they eventually give way to happier times. 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 2 minutes ago, Life Of Tass said: *big hug* The past half hour I had another gender identity crisis, for an unknown reason, and I ended up remembering that I exist in a weird state of androgynous neutrality and agender fits me well enough. I pulled through though, and I believe that you can do so too! Remember, bad times are just times that just so happen to be bad, and they eventually give way to happier times. Thank you. I hate it when the problem is something I can't exert any control over. There is a hell of a lot of risk here... and not much comfort to be found. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 1 hour ago, CustardCream said: What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. *giant hug* You're more than enough. 😟 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
anisotrophic Posted August 23, 2019 Share Posted August 23, 2019 4 hours ago, PoeciMeta said: Oh yeah I forgot I'm also a bit concerned. hah, me too, a bit concerned. actually am feeling upset/worried about my changing sexuality in starting T. I think my previous tactic of "ignore/sublimate" is failing, I feel miserable. my partner researched what to expect on this issue better than I did. (ok I guess that makes sense if he's ace, he's got reasons to worry about it. plus I've been avoiding the topic.) I'm hating myself for it, he's being kind and says we'll take it one day at a time.@CustardCream oh god, the same evening, that seems so petty. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bloc Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 21 hours ago, Celyn said: "Your gender is whatever your phone suggests after "I am a..." " good idea/person/advice. It seems that my tablet likes me at the moment. So my gender is a good idea how. 8 hours ago, CustardCream said: What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. Feel hugged from me as long as you like. 👐 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 1 hour ago, Bloc said: 10 hours ago, CustardCream said: What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. Feel hugged from me as long as you like. Ditto this. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DarkStormyKnight Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 15 hours ago, CustardCream said: What it should say is 'I am not enough', because that's the reality right now, and it hurts, and I need a hug. hughughughughug 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 Thanks for the hugs everyone - they mean a lot more than I can say. I might be reading too much into the situation, but I know what he wants to happen, and he's already outed me to her. Super, just what I always wanted. I asked if she understood the concept of asexuality and he said no, she got confused and she thought - and I quote - that I was 'non-binary'. I went, well, very quiet at that that point. Yeah, great. I think I'm staying firmly in the gender closet for the foreseeable future... 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 10 minutes ago, CustardCream said: I asked if she understood the concept of asexuality and he said no, she got confused and she thought - and I quote - that I was 'non-binary'. I went, well, very quiet at that that point. Yeah, great. I think I'm staying firmly in the gender closet for the foreseeable future You are not obliged to out yourself to anyone, and your husband has no right to out you to anyone else so I'm super mad at him on your behalf for that. 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 1 minute ago, Celyn said: You are not obliged to out yourself to anyone, and your husband has no right to out you to anyone else so I'm super mad at him on your behalf for that. From what I can make out he's told all his female friends. Sheesh. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 34 minutes ago, CustardCream said: From what I can make out he's told all his female friends. Sheesh. I AM TAMPING. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Custard Cream Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 4 minutes ago, Celyn said: I AM TAMPING. It's OK. He is struggling with accepting my asexuality, and he simply doesn't understand that outing me is unacceptable. I know he's only done it because he needs to vent about it, and he's never going to seek support from strangers. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 5 minutes ago, CustardCream said: he simply doesn't understand that outing me is unacceptable. He dang well should understand. It's not rocket science. I get that it's all new shocking information to him. My dad had the same reaction when I told him I was trans, he told everyone he knew about it and asked their opinions and used their shock to justify his "conclusion" that I was "just a tomboy". I guess we trust the people we love to keep personal stuff to themselves without being asked but they don't. Can't trust anyone. I don't know, now I'm so tired of it, I'm just like, fine, I don't have secrets. You don't have to like these facts about me or even believe them. 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
anisotrophic Posted August 24, 2019 Share Posted August 24, 2019 @CustardCream was it your gender identity status being outed, not about outing asexuality? This is a digression (maybe your relationship stuff should be in another thread) but... He should vent to a therapist. And he should go online dating if he wants to date, this is roughly a "don't shit where you eat" situation. Whether he's conscious of it or not, I think "venting" to female friends is an effort to get pity (and more favors), not a genuine team effort at working through a rough patch with you. IMNSHO. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Janus the Fox Posted August 25, 2019 Share Posted August 25, 2019 A bit on the local news was that Wales has just opened its own gender clinic in Cardiff’s St. David’s Hospital, ready for an early September opening, hopefully cutting down waiting and long journeys to London for this. Hopefully in time, I could have some professional discussion on my gender. 9 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Celyn: The Lutening Posted August 25, 2019 Share Posted August 25, 2019 33 minutes ago, Janus DarkFox said: Wales has just opened its own gender clinic in Cardiff, hopefully cutting down waiting and long journeys to London for this. About time! That's awesome news. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bloc Posted August 27, 2019 Share Posted August 27, 2019 I was cycling on a shared bike-pedestrian lane when a man told me: "Young lady, this is path is for pedestrians". Being called young lady didn't feel wrong, but also didn't give a flash of euphoria. However this was the first time a random stranger seeing me as a woman and expressing it and I did not much effort in passing. Before the reaction was that people could not put me into a box. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
PoeciMeta Posted August 28, 2019 Share Posted August 28, 2019 Wow, I had no idea gender was called 'sexual identity' where I live. Gotta love the ambiguity. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
no-longer-in-use Posted August 29, 2019 Share Posted August 29, 2019 13 hours ago, PoeciMeta said: Wow, I had no idea gender was called 'sexual identity' where I live. Gotta love the ambiguity. I hate when people conflate sexuality and gender, and the word "identity" never added anything to anything. Nonbinary isn't my "gender identity" any more than asexual is my "sexual identity", they're just my gender and sexuality. 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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