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I don't buy it!


RoseGoesToYale

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OmegaTheMetamorphicDreamer

But they're as brittle as stale crackers, and taste like them too.

 

My all-purpose medicine can cure any disease!

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ThatLonelyBookworm

But it's also toxic and you will most likely die after taking it.

 

My blankets are the most snuggliest blankets in the world!

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KuraTheChibiSleepingBeauty

But they make you itch and itch and itch.

 

I have a telephone that can contact Death. 

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OmegaTheMetamorphicDreamer

But Death is super busy and never has time to answer any calls.

 

These magic glasses will give you perfect vision, even if you're blind.

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ThatLonelyBookworm

But they also make you deaf.

This lipstick never wears off, and never gets on your teeth! It's the most foolproof lipstick in the galaxy!

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KuraTheChibiSleepingBeauty

But it makes everything taste like turnips.

 

This mirror can transport you to any magical world!

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Chloe O'Leary

But it's a one-way trip.

My new notebook never runs out of paper!

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  • 2 weeks later...

But it runs on malt whiskey.

 

This VR computer creates a perfect clone of the universe for you to play god in.

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OmegaTheMetamorphicDreamer

But it only runs at one frame per minute.

 

This glass will never run out of water.

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