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Can an aro ace be a Cupid?


Mondo_Eric

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Even though I am an aro-ace, I still encourage those who are sexuals and romantics, when in love, to try and be happy and if they ask for help, I try to give the best advice so they feel happy. Like for example, one of my friends basically met his girlfriend in part because of me. Later I came to me one night and began to ask for my advice, I made some questions, like if there was some sort of chemistry, unusual attitude of interest, etc. and even though my experiences didn't work for me I was able to learn and give him some hints which basically ended up in they becoming a couple several weeks later, and they marry in November.

So do we still possess the power of being a Cupid agent even though SOME OF US will not have the experience ourselves?

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AdelaideAceHeart

I think so, I'm also aro ace and a lot of people come to me with relationship problems. It is kind of funny because while we may seem to be the worst suited to this position because we (at least I) have never experienced the romantic relationships that they have, we could be the best suited to it because we can see the bigger picture and not get caught up in the "romance" of it if that makes any sense. Basically, we can give better advice because we see it from the outside not the inside and we can better see what does and does not work.

Please note I don't speak for all aro aces, this is just for me and a few I have talked to that see things the same way I do

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Maybe being an 'outsider' can have its advantages, you're an impartial observer and can see things that people 'blinded' by emotion can't. That sounds very clinical and isn't quite as I intended it, I hope you can get my meaning.

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"Later I came to me one night".

Huh? You came to yourself one night???

Logic says it is a typo and you should read "he" intead of "I".

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princesspeach

I'm not aro (but I'm not ruling it out yet) but the goss of my friends' relationships is actually like my favourite topic of conversation! I love finding out all the details of their dates and if they're having trouble then I genuinely help them (with all my non-existent experience lol) :) and I'm pretty sure I'm more invested in TV/movie/book/friends' relationships than my own :\

So idk, maybe like Thankmyluckystar said, you can be a Cupid agent because you can see the broader picture??

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byanyotherusername

Some people are good at giving relationship advice and others are not. I think that's the same for aromantic asexuals as it is for anyone else...I've always been sought after for relationship advice, and there are probably multiple reasons for it a) I'm sought after for advice on lots of things--if you read a lot of books people assume you're smart XD, b) I'm discreet, c) I'm a good mediator, d) in the case of straight females wanting my advice, it's often because they know that I have a lot of male friends and thus assume I must have some kind of sense of how they think, e) in the case of straight males wanting advice, it is often because I am one of their few close female friends and they want to know how we think. XD

All of that being said, I do think my aromanticism caused me to have a slight obsession with analyzing romantic relationships. The more I seemed to understand, the more I always felt like there was something I didn't "get" and I was determined to figure out what it was. Then I found AVEN and everything clicked. In the meantime, I developed a pretty accurate sense of how relationships worked.

I think of myself as the opposite of a Cupid, though. I was nick-named the "relationship psychic" in high school because I could predict with fairly good accuracy how, why and when couples would break up. I could easily foresee potential problems, cross-reference that with my knowledge of the personalities of the two people involved, and plot a trajectory for the romance. My formula has become less accurate as I age and the people around me become more mature and capable of sustaining long-term committed relationships. I know why people break up. But why people get/stay together? I have NO idea. :lol:

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