Was your first kiss gross?

[Kalanchoë]

So I recently started dating this guy, my first boyfriend ever, and yesterday he kissed me on the lips as we were saying goodbye (for what is about to be a very long time :( ). I'd had a feeling that this would happen, and so I'd been staring at his lips all afternoon (not too obviously, I hope) trying to muster up some interest in them, trying to imagine myself kissing him...but in the end it was just as weird and unpleasant as I had always imagined. And wet. Granted, I have never kissed anyone before and was probably doing it wrong, but I just have the horrible feeling that this relationship can only go bad places if I can't kiss the guy, not to mention the fact that I don't want to have sex with him. Does it get better? What, exactly, is the appeal of kissing?

Anyway, if anyone has some advice/experience to share, it would be much appreciated. :)

[Filmfan]

Yesterday he kissed me on the lips as we were saying goodbye ...but in the end it was just as weird and unpleasant as I had always imagined. And wet.

Does it get better? What, exactly, is the appeal of kissing?

I was 23 for my first kiss. I really liked the guy, and I saw it coming. When he leaned in, I remember telling myself, "OK, don't freak out. You wanted this, remember?" It kind of felt mechanical, like two sets of lips pressing together. But when he went in for the second one, it was like fireworks! I was thinking, "Wow! Can you do that again?"

So, yeah, it can get better provided that you want to kiss and that you want to kiss the other person involved. Then, it can feel awfully darn good. Otherwise, it is just kind of gross.

If I were you, I'd ask myself if I want to try kissing again, and then I'd ask myself if I want to kiss this particular person. If the answer is "yes" for both of those, definitely try again. If you answer "no" to either question, then you probably didn't enjoy it because the person and/or act isn't right for you. And that's perfectly OK. ;)

[AllyCat]

My first kiss was terrible! I was fifteen, dancing with a boy at summer camp, and I could tell he wanted to kiss me. So I thought "why not?", leaned in, and closed my eyes. He then proceeded to stick his tongue as far into my mouth as he could get it. Blech! I made some excuse to go hide in the bathroom. I remember thinking, "People do this for fun? Why?"

The spirit did not move me again until I was seventeen. At which point everything went beautifully, and I suddenly understood why people kissed for fun.

I think that if you're going to enjoy kissing, the spirit has to move you, and your partner has to be paying attention to your body language. It can't be forced. Maybe you'll like it someday, and maybe you won't, but trying to push yourself to like it so this guy will like you is not going to work.

[Ailurus]

I enjoyed my first kiss in spite of it being not at all as clean and chaste as I had hoped.

Basically, kissing in general is gross for me. Bleh. Wet and disgusting. But at the right time, in the right atmosphere, and doing it for the right reasons, it still feels like a warm and comfortable gesture to me. I can't kiss for no reason, personally. There has to be a lot of emotion behind it.

Don't do it when you don't want to because it feels "harmless". You'll just come to resent it. If you have to try to be interested, it's probably a bad idea.

[FallenAngel]

I got my first kiss last year, when I was 15. My boyfriend at the time took me to times square and said he had a surprise for me. But how obvious can it get?? Eh well, you know how some people say there's a "spark" or whatever. Yeahhhh, no. Just felt like skin against skin to me.

[you*hear*but*do*you*listen]

I nearly threw up after my first kiss. I'd turned 16 a few days before, and this boy who was interested in me knew I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16. He asked me if I'd go out with him (actually, he said he loved me) and I agreed, thinking I could use this as an experiment (poor high school me, trying so hard to be sexual). His idea of kissing me was shoving his tongue in my mouth. Yep, nearly puked. The few times I let him kiss me after that were marginally less nasty because I wouldn't let him stick his tongue in my mouth. I broke it off with him after two dates.

Now I'm in sort of a romantic friendship with a girl who I really care about, and she likes kissing me (she may be biromantic, and she thinks she's a genuine late bloomer in terms of sexual orientation), and it's not gross since I'm so emotionally close to her, but it's boring.

[knout]

Never happened, and probably never will

[Sally]

Yes, it was gross, and the process never ever got any better, no matter who.

[SecretSaucer]

haha I was drunk, seventeen, and it was Valentine's Day, so it seemed more silly than gross.

[Shinnok]

Mine was on a dare. It sucked. I thought he liked me but turns out he didn't. I was 12 when this happened. It was a normal kiss...I didn't think it was gross or anything. It's just if I could kiss someone I really had a romantic attraction to I bet it is heavenly

[ChaliceFlame]

Funny thing my first kiss was very early and then no more kissing. I was a school bus and the other children dare us (me and a boy) to kiss so we do. I don't remember much, just that I kissed that boy.

[LittleMermaid]

I had my first kiss last year when I was 16.

well, you know how some people say there's a "spark" or whatever. Yeahhhh, no. Just felt like skin against skin to me.

Yeah, same here. People say there's "sparks" and "fireworks", but I didn't feel anything. It really did just feel like skin against skin.

[Elven valkyrie]

I had mine when I was 16. Wasn't impressed.

No one has really felt 'right' yet and I've mostly not wanted the action when it was coming my way.

[Tanwen]

I was 16 and on a Youth Adventure Course in a place called Plas-y-Brennin in North Wales. His name was Ian Butterwoth, he came form somewhere round Oldham and was on a rock-climbing course. THe main thing I remember are(is????) his bright red cllimbing socks... :)

[Kalanchoë]

Thanks for the advice and stories, everyone! I am feeling reassured and a little less weird now. :) I'll probably have to give it another try and see how it goes...but I'd hate to tell him that it doesn't do anything for me, because he wrote me after to tell me how meaningful it had been for him. Arrghh he is so wonderful, all I want to do is hug him to death, that would be quite enough for me...

[BabySquare]

yes, and it was gross because he shoved his tongue down my throat.

i was 14 and it was so bad that the next morning when he wanted to kiss me goodbye before school i didn't let him and actually ran away when he wasn't looking! (he was living with me - we were both in foster care)

for a girl i can be a right a**hole sometimes

but it has gotten better since then - but i've only properly kissed i think 2 guys since then - the last one was an EXTREMELY good kisser, and i'd had my lower lip pierced by then a couple of times and piercings are supposed to enhance pleasure if placed in sensitive areas like lips, and for me that is definately true.

interestingly though i haven't kissed anyone since having my tongue pierced - another sensitive place - i'm looking foward to that one

(cood be extra good if they've got it done too, on the flipside could be funny if they don't know i've got it them- me- :P / ;) )

[Parth]

I find kissing completely ridiculous. Pecks on the lips are okay, but the moment the mouth opens, ugh. Last time, I couldn't stop laughing at the silly grossness.

[sakura_alice]

My first kiss was funny. We had just started dating, and his face was really close to mine, and I looked at him for a second, and he smiled, and I tried to kiss him...but our noses bumped and I missed! :redface: I was like, "ah! I'm sorry!" and he said "it's okay, let's try again" so we did, and it was better. No tongue, thank god. I always thought the tongue was for make-out sessions, I had no idea people did that for a regular kiss! How nasty! Back to the kiss, there weren't any...fireworks or anything, but I did feel loved because I got a kiss.

My first french kiss however was disgusting. When he did it, I thought "!?...what the hell?? Uh..." and I was in a funk for the rest of the day thinking, "ew, yuck, I feel violated..." <_<

[sinisterporpoise]

So I recently started dating this guy, my first boyfriend ever, and yesterday he kissed me on the lips as we were saying goodbye (for what is about to be a very long time :( ). I'd had a feeling that this would happen, and so I'd been staring at his lips all afternoon (not too obviously, I hope) trying to muster up some interest in them, trying to imagine myself kissing him...but in the end it was just as weird and unpleasant as I had always imagined. And wet. Granted, I have never kissed anyone before and was probably doing it wrong, but I just have the horrible feeling that this relationship can only go bad places if I can't kiss the guy, not to mention the fact that I don't want to have sex with him. Does it get better? What, exactly, is the appeal of kissing?

Anyway, if anyone has some advice/experience to share, it would be much appreciated. :)

I've only kissed a girl once. It wasn't appealing. It just simply was. It wasn't anything magical or romantic, it was just my lips touching hers. This was several years after my first steady girlfriend broke up with me because I wouldn't kiss her. I'm completely oblvious when it comes to flirting.

[Lorem Ipsum]

I had my first kiss almost a year ago, when I was 17. Didn't mind it--no fireworks, but it didn't feel gross. Tried french kissing once, and that was all kinds of awkward.

Not much experience with kissing beyond that, so I can't say if it would get any better. I think I'm really more of a hug person, though. Hugs are awesome.

[Quarky]

So I recently started dating this guy, my first boyfriend ever, and yesterday he kissed me on the lips as we were saying goodbye (for what is about to be a very long time :( ). I'd had a feeling that this would happen, and so I'd been staring at his lips all afternoon (not too obviously, I hope) trying to muster up some interest in them, trying to imagine myself kissing him...but in the end it was just as weird and unpleasant as I had always imagined. And wet. Granted, I have never kissed anyone before and was probably doing it wrong, but I just have the horrible feeling that this relationship can only go bad places if I can't kiss the guy, not to mention the fact that I don't want to have sex with him. Does it get better? What, exactly, is the appeal of kissing?

Anyway, if anyone has some advice/experience to share, it would be much appreciated. :)

The whole intrigue of kissing is completely psychological. If you only think about the emotional implications, it will be great.

But no matter who you are, if you really think about it physically, it really is disgusting.

So try to think about the reason you are kissing this guy. Because you love him, disgusting aspects thrown out the window.

If you don't love him enough to kiss him, don't kiss him.

Edit: and don't think there is a right or wrong way to kiss someone. The first time I kissed a girl I ended up making out with her cheek. That was bad.

[FallenAngel]

I had my first kiss almost a year ago, when I was 17. Didn't mind it--no fireworks, but it didn't feel gross. Tried french kissing once, and that was all kinds of awkward.

Not much experience with kissing beyond that, so I can't say if it would get any better. I think I'm really more of a hug person, though. Hugs are awesome.

Yessss my first kiss was soooo awkward. So many things were running through my head like: what am i supposed to do now? am I supposed to just stay in this position? how long should i hold the kiss? should I be the one to break away first? am i doing this right?? is my breath ok?!?!

I am a hug person toooooo! Hugs > kisses any day for me :D

[Jaide]

Mine was weird. My lips were numb and tingly for days after and not in an enjoyable way. I am aspie though perhaps it was a sensory overload thing. Never happened again though.

[niku-bot]

I really didn't like my first kiss. I thought it was okay, the kiss itself, but it was with a boy I only liked as a friend. I didn't know that it was girls that sent the sparks flying for me then, and it wasn't that I assumed myself to be heterosexual, it was just that girls like boys, I never really thought there was an alternative even though I knew it existed (huh?), and I just thought everyone felt that way about love and they were all exaggerating. I really have to like the person I'm going to kiss for me to enjoy it, I later realized. < /babble >

[chipmunkgirl]

My first was cool and wet and awkward and a little gross, and feeling the guy's tongue against mine, all I could think was "THIS IS IT??? This is what kissing is like??" and then I started to giggle. Second kiss was much like the first, except without the element of surprise. I went out with another guy after that and I had my jaws clamped shut so he couldn't get into my mouth.

[Isaac]

My first kiss was wonderful. Until that, I deemed mouth kiss too gross, and I still consider so coldly thinking. People are taking conscience of the dangers of kissing under the threat of swine flu. If she had not kissed me suddenly, I would never engaged in mouth kissing. She kissed my lips and I found it comfortable and easy, contrary to my imagination. I kissed her back, and I started the interchange of tongues. It was like chewing gum. Probably it was determinant that my kisser was a very loved friend. Otherwise it would have been gross and I would not have engaged in it.

Edit: And I didn't feel it wet, but dry. We both needed to drink quite water after that.

[Miselle Serafine]

When I played around with kissing as a kid, I remember it being awful, but I kind of enjoyed my first proper kiss. He'd walked me home and as we hugged goodbye I saw him look down at me and smile so I just went 'damn it all to hell' and went in. It was pretty chaste, but warm and gentle. I liked it, but it was nothing earth-shattering.

My first french kiss - ehhhh. It was all right, but as soon as I could, I went kthanxbai! and legged it.

Mind you, if I kissed someone I really loved, instinct tells me it would be better. I hope so - I'd kind of like to get the fireworks feeling just once in my life.

[Guest member25959]

I was about 10 i think? My firstkiss wasn't pleasant, it felt like a warm slug eh

[odayakanaumi]

Quite frankly...yes. I've actually only been kissed once in my life, and it just so happened to take place on my 19th birthday [or rather early next morning]. It was with the guy I have a slight romantic crush on and I thought that seeing as I do like him, I should like him kissing me. I was sadly mistaken.

[KingOfCookies]

I was 15 when I had my first one. And when it happened, I remember I was so caught up in the emotion and all that, I didnt know what it felt like. Kissing again many years later felt very different, because that first time, it was almost an out of body experience.