If...

[dabishop]

<gulp> <gulp>

[Cate Perfect]

No, no, you're all fine. He doesn't come here. He wouldn't. He's a raging sexual. So much so that it doesn't matter if the way he expresses it is legal or not.

Look at all the people playing the game now...I'll add a few more questions in a couple of days. :D

Cate

[fluffy_hime]

Cate, that sounds like a fine fellow. And by fine fellow, what I mean is sordid sub-human being. The type of person I'd like to see alone in a room full of angry asexuals.

[Cate Perfect]

sordid sub-human being.

So you've met him? :D

Cate

[JimDandy]

<phew>

I think we're off the hook, Bishop.

21. If you could have been the author of any single book already written, which book would you want to have penned?

The Dictionary. That way, I'd have already written every book ever written and I'd RULE THE LITERARY WORLD! :twisted: MWAAA!

22. If you could have any one specific power over other people, what would it be?

Just by focusing my will, I'd like to be able to make people act like a pirate.

(At the State of the Union speech)

President: My fellow Americans....

Me: <FOCUS>

President: Aar! The ship 'o state be sailin' smooth, ye landlubbers!

23. If you could become famous for doing something that you don't currently do, what would it be?

I like to be famous for being able to resist a straight line.

Person: We have a lake cabin with two docks.

Me: ......

24. If you could have lived during one period of time in past history, when and where would it be?

The Philidelphia Mass Turbulence of 1940.

25. If you had to spend one year alone in the wilderness, where would you go?

Detroit.

26. If you could possess one supernatural ability, what would it be?

The uncanny ability to summon tree sloths to my aid. I'd be invincible! Eventually.

27. If you could forever eliminate one specific type of prejudice from the earth, which would it be?

I'd elimate racism by turning everyone's skin color half black and half white. Right down the middle. Yeah. That's sure to work.

28. If your home were to be totally destroyed by fire but you could save just one thing, what would it be?

My cat. Or my complete collection of "Planet of the Apes" bubblegum cards. No...wait...definately my cat.

29. If you were to have your friends, in private, attribute a single quality to you, what would you want it to be?

I'd like to be known as a very, very serious person.

30. If you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

I'd kill my best friend using the most fiendish, undetectable method known to humanity. Old age! MWAAA!

[Vicious Trollop]

I'd elimate racism by turning everyone's skin color half black and half white. Right down the middle. Yeah. That's sure to work.

You'd have to be careful to make sure everyone's face was colored exactly the same, though. Reminds me of the original series Star Trek episode where James T. Kirk & crew met a race who looked just like that: half their face black, half their face white. Except half the race had a black left face and white right face, the other half exactly the opposite, and though the good trekkers couldn't tell the difference, the aliens were just as racist and hateful toward each other as any groups on good ol' Earth.

[basenji]

Okay, here goes........

1) To live a well off, comfortable, stress-free life.

2) Perfect pitch.

3) Felicity Kendall.

4) Tibet.

5) WWII, Just to understand what it was like for the Vets.

6) Ticks.

7) Felicity Kendall.

8) Applied myself in High School.

9) There is a nice cottage in Big Bend that I've had my eye on.

10) Mr. Osama Bin Ladden, any way possible!

11. "The Life of Brian"

12. "How to survive on a deserted Island"

13. The Big Bang.....that or the cause of the Dinosaurs extinction.

14. None, they all need to hang for public appreciation.

15. X.

16. Amsterdam.

17. Compassion.

18. Please, please, for the love of god, continue with your art!

19. Immortality

20. Mother Earth, I don't feel I've truley "visited" it yet

21. The Bibe, lighten it up a bit!

22. I don't want to control others, let them be.

23. I don't think I want to be famous, too much of a hastle.

24. 1900's in the U.S. looked like fun, (plus, the herb was legal!).

25. Utah

26. Flight

27. Religious

28. Photo book(s).

29. extroversion, aversion to cigarettes!

30. Myself - I could'nt kill some one I know.

[fluffy_hime]

Basenji, your av is Vicious, right? AvenGuy still has Spike, I think! :D

[basenji]

Yes, that is correct f.h. I was looking for a good "Ed & Ein" but could not find.

[fluffy_hime]

This is a cute one.

Or also:

http://www.ezthemes.com/previews/e/ed-ein2_wp.jpg

http://www.hatsuyume.net/users/space/JEMBebop2.jpg

http://pelovish.com/clie/bgs/bebop-ed+ein.jpg

Just go to Google Image search and put in "Ed and Ein."

[basenji]

Thanks for the pics, I'll need to muck about w/ them in P.S and get them down to acceptable size, (as you can see Vicious turned out weak), as soon as I get off my butt and write a post for the welcome area (it's not going to be pretty!).

[Cate Perfect]

31. If a photograph of one part of your body were to be used in an advertisement, which part would you want to be used, and for what product or service?

32. If you could bring back any past leader of your country to run the country again, who would you want?

33. If you could own any building in existence, which would you pick?

34. If you could choose exactly what you will eat and drink for your last meal before death, what would the menu consist of?

35. If you could own any one existing sculpture from anywhere in the world, but not the right to ever sell it, which one would you want?

36. If you could have composed any single piece of music that already exists, which would you choose?

37. If you were invited to join one current musical group, which group would you want to be a member of, and what instrument would you play?

38. If you were to receive any existing public award, what award would you like to win?

39. If you could decide how to spend your last day alive, what would you do?

40. If you could decide what will be written on your gravestone, what would you have inscribed?

Cate

[Cate Perfect]

31. If a photograph of one part of your body were to be used in an advertisement, which part would you want to be used, and for what product or service?

Hair, of course. Shampoo, I suppose.

32. If you could bring back any past leader of your country to run the country again, who would you want?

JFK

33. If you could own any building in existence, which would you pick?

One of the colleges at Oxford, probably. New College is quite beautiful. Or perhaps the Sheldonian.

34. If you could choose exactly what you will eat and drink for your last meal before death, what would the menu consist of?

Mmmmm. Filet Mignon. I normally don't eat meat, but my last meal...chocolate mousse for dessert. Or perhaps I would eat all desserts. Tarts and French Silk pie.

35. If you could own any one existing sculpture from anywhere in the world, but not the right to ever sell it, which one would you want?

Does the Trevi Fountain count? It's a sculpture.

36. If you could have composed any single piece of music that already exists, which would you choose?

Hmmmm... Not sure... Oh! I know... 'O Fortuna' from the Carmina Burana.

37. If you were invited to join one current musical group, which group would you want to be a member of, and what instrument would you play?

I'm not a huge fan of current groups. Whatever group I was in I would play drums. Oh, unless I joined a chamber music group then I'd play violin.

38. If you were to receive any existing public award, what award would you like to win?

Nobel Prize for Literature. Or a dameship from the Queen.

39. If you could decide how to spend your last day alive, what would you do?

I would want to spend it somewhere beautiful. The Oracle at Delphi or the island of Hydra, off the coast of Greece. I would spend it alone, just walking about nature and then go to sleep in a comfy bed.

40. If you could decide what will be written on your gravestone, what would you have inscribed?

I plan to be cremated, but I suppose 'Dance here'.

Cate

[Guest]

31. My eyes, for a contact company. Woo for contacts!

32. Let's go with Trudeau.

33. One of those Victorian houses.

34. I'm going to go with pizza & cheesy breadsticks, with chocolate mousse cake for dessert. Some of that olde tymy cream soda too.

35. I'm too uncultured to answer...

36. "Cesspools in Eden" by the Dead Kennedys

37. I'd want to join the Astro Zombies, and play the stand-up bass.

38. Several degrees in Excellence from the University of Awesome.

39. I don't want to say "Shooting everyone I hate." So instead I'll say visiting Europe. Doing what, I don't know.

40. I don't want to be buried or cremated, I'd rather have the whole body just tossed to science. But I'm going to have to say... "She rocked. I can't believe you have to live in a world without her."

[fluffy_hime]

YAY more questions! Pssst...Cate...why are we doing code? ::shrugs and quotes Cate::

31. If a photograph of one part of your body were to be used in an advertisement, which part would you want to be used, and for what product or service?

My legs or feet are the least offensive part of my body. One of those Venus razor commercials maybe. :D

32. If you could bring back any past leader of your country to run the country again, who would you want?

Andrew 'Old Hickory' Jackson, just to stir things up. The first president to be impeached...or was it the only? Didn't Nixon resign first? Anyway, I guess Clinton. Things seemed better then.

33. If you could own any building in existence, which would you pick?

Something large and famous I could charge outlandish admission to. The Taj Mahal maybe or Versailles Palace.

34. If you could choose exactly what you will eat and drink for your last meal before death, what would the menu consist of?

Too morbid. :shock:

35. If you could own any one existing sculpture from anywhere in the world, but not the right to ever sell it, which one would you want?

The David. And he would wear pants. Forever.

36. If you could have composed any single piece of music that already exists, which would you choose?

Something classic.

37. If you were invited to join one current musical group, which group would you want to be a member of, and what instrument would you play?

System of a Down! But I'm not Armenian...and I also can't play any instruments. :D

38. If you were to receive any existing public award, what award would you like to win?

Ooh good idea, Cate. Except I'd rather be knighted. Or the Noble prize for peace.

39. If you could decide how to spend your last day alive, what would you do?

Goodness. All these morbid questions.

40. If you could decide what will be written on your gravestone, what would you have inscribed?

When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits,

I dreamed of changing the world.

As I grew older and wiser I discovered the world would not change

So I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change my country

But it too seemed unmoveable.

As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt,

I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me.

But alas they would have none of it!

And now I realize, as I lie on my deathbed, that if I had only changed myself first,

Then by example I might have changed my family.

From their aspirations and encouragement I would have been able to better my country

And who knows, I might have even changed the world.

Inscribed on the tomb of an Anglican Bishop at Westminster Abbey

[Cate Perfect]

39. I don't want to say "Shooting everyone I hate."

*dying* Why not? That's a brilliant idea, actually. You only have one day left, I say do something profound. Go kill the person you hate most.

Fluffy, code was easier *is lazy*. Also, the morbid questions just all came within three pages of one another in the book. I noticed that, as well.

And there are two 'David's. The original, which is in a museum in Florence and a copy, which is at the Palazzo Vecchio (sp). You could put a loin cloth on both of them. :D Oh. And dameships/damehoods are the female equivalent of being knighted.

And I liked your epitaph. :D

Cate

[Kombucha2000]

1) If you were to be granted one wish, what would it be?

to have either magic or psychic powers (that way I could grant some of my own wishes)

2) If you could suddenly possess an extraordinary talent in one of the arts, what would you like it to be?

Play the recorder like the Pied Piper.

3) If you could spend one whole night alone with anyone in history, who would you choose?

that's tough. Maybe Napoleon, or Doestoevsky.

4) If you could physically transport yourself to any place in the world at this moment, where would you go?

Trannsylvaina

5) If you could have lived through any war in history (without actually fighting in it), which would it be?

I prefer Golden and Silver Ages, but I guess maybe the Civil War.

6) If you had to eliminate a single type of animal forevermore, which would you choose?

wasps or people. I've gotta disagree with Cate's response of leeches. I have a lot of respect for them, they've been used by the medical profession for centuries. They're good for reattaching amputated limbs and helping with circulation and stuff.

7) If you could have an elegant dinner alone with anyone presently alive, whether you know them or not, who would you want it to be?

Jhonen Vasquez or Julian Sands

8 ) If you could, in retrospect, change one thing about your childhood, what would it be?

have more friends.

9) If you could have any room in the world become your bedroom from now on, which room would you choose?

I like mine thank you.

10) If you had to assasinate one famous person who is alive right now, who would it be and how would you do it?

Bin Laden, by any means

11. If you could have had the starring role in one film already made, which movie would you pick?

Queen Mab in Merlin

12. If you were to be stranded forever on a desert island and could have only one book to read, which would you want?

some survival guide.

13. If you could have witnessed one event in history, what would you want to have seen?

thats a toughy...

14. If you could own one painting from any collection in the world but were not allowed to sell it, which work of art would you select?

"The Lute" by Dewing http://www.drgabb.com/poetry/poems_csg/greens_of_dewing.htm

15. If you could have chosen your own first name, other than your current one, what would it be?

I like my name.

16. If you had to live the rest of your life in a place that you have never lived before, where would you live?

Amstardam

17. If you were to be recognised by posterity for one thing, what would you like to be known for?

being a threat to humanity :twisted:

18. If you could have said one sentence to Hitler while he was alive, what would you have said?

"go fuck yourself"

19. If you could be guaranteed one thing in life besides money, what would you ask for?

happiness

20. If you could easily visit one known planet, which one would you go to?

Saturn

21. If you could have been the author of any single book already written, which book would you want to have penned?

"The Devils" by Doestoevsky

22. If you could have any one specific power over other people, what would it be?

to either make them forget things, or make them see the truth.

23. If you could become famous for doing something that you don't currently do, what would it be?

win James Randi's paranormal challenge

24. If you could have lived during one period of time in past history, when and where would it be?

Maybe during the rise of the Roman empire

25. If you had to spend one year alone in the wilderness, where would you go?

somewhere that's warm and has plenty of berries and water.

26. If you could possess one supernatural ability, what would it be?

mind control.

27. If you could forever eliminate one specific type of prejudice from the earth, which would it be?

Racism.

28. If your home were to be totally destroyed by fire but you could save just one thing, what would it be?

I'm a pack rat, I have so much junk I wouldn't know where to begin...

29. If you were to have your friends, in private, attribute a single quality to you, what would you want it to be?

Their knowledge. Knowledge is POWER!!! Muha-haha! :twisted:

30. If you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

no one close to me has pissed me off enough to want to kill.

[Vicious Trollop]

31. If a photograph of one part of your body were to be used in an advertisement, which part would you want to be used, and for what product or service?

Hmm, like Cate I'd probably have to say my greatest asset is my hair, though I'm far too impatient to grow it out to such a beautiful length.

32. If you could bring back any past leader of your country to run the country again, who would you want?

Hard to answer because I've just started reading Lies My Teacher Told Me and I'm finding out all the horrible things about the leaders who have been put on pedestals. Beloved Woodrow Wilson was a white supremacist! But I don't think anything too bad can be said against Martin Luther King Jr, perhaps.

33. If you could own any building in existence, which would you pick?

I really don't want to ever do anything as mature as owning a building (really do not ever want to live in a house).

34. If you could choose exactly what you will eat and drink for your last meal before death, what would the menu consist of?

Pineapple pizza and a LOT of alcohol.

35. If you could own any one existing sculpture from anywhere in the world, but not the right to ever sell it, which one would you want?

I'm not really conversant on sculptures. Just not any of that wacky modern art that my 2-year-old niece could approximate.

36. If you could have composed any single piece of music that already exists, which would you choose?

Again I'm having a bit of a crisis over intellectual property, but for some reason Ravel's Bolero is leaping to mind.

37. If you were invited to join one current musical group, which group would you want to be a member of, and what instrument would you play?

I want to learn acoustic guitar and play solo. I don't get along with others. I'd like to tour with Aimee Mann, though.

38. If you were to receive any existing public award, what award would you like to win?

Um, Nobel Prize for Literature? Can't seem to think of many public awards, at the moment.

39. If you could decide how to spend your last day alive, what would you do?

I can't think about such things... I'd just sit around and bawl my eyes out, most likely.

40. If you could decide what will be written on your gravestone, what would you have inscribed?

Again with the freakish morbidity... Long time ago I read someone's answer to this question saying "life is a banquet, and I died fat!" which is rather nice.

[fluffy_hime]

Cate, who made the fake David? In that case, both of them will wear pants. Twin pinstripes. ::nods::

A dameship is female knighting, eh? Hmm..."knighting" sounds cooler though. Do dames get the sword-to-shoulder gesture?

[fluffy_hime]

MORE!

[Vicious Trollop]

SECONDS FLUFFY!

[Cate Perfect]

Okay! :D

I'll take the book to work tonight and put some more up. (If the internet is working, which has been iffy lately.) If not then I'll do it when I get home in the morning.

Cate

[Cate Perfect]

41. If you had to choose the single most valuable thing you ever learned, what would it be?

42. If you could enact one law in your country that does not currently exist, what would it be?

43. If you could be the current world champion in any one sport, which sport would it be?

44. If you could spend a weekend in any hotel in the world with all expenses paid, which hotel would you choose?

45. If you could cast an actor now alive to play you in a new film, what kind of film would it be and who would you choose?

46. If you could have your portrait painted by any painter in history, to whom would you give the commission.

47. If you were given one hour to spend an unlimited amount of money in any store in the world, where would it be?

48. If you could say one sentence to the leader of the country you are presently in, what would you say?

49. If you had to choose the best advertising campaign ever created, which one would it be?

50. If you could have been any person from history, who would you want to have been?

Cate

[Cate Perfect]

41. If you had to choose the single most valuable thing you ever learned, what would it be?

Life isn't fair. So whining is no use and only annoys everyone else.

42. If you could enact one law in your country that does not currently exist, what would it be?

Republicans with loads of money can no longer steal elections. I didn't realise we didn't have that law, but apparently we don't.

43. If you could be the current world champion in any one sport, which sport would it be?

Does chess count?

44. If you could spend a weekend in any hotel in the world with all expenses paid, which hotel would you choose?

Mmmmm Either The Plaza New York or Browns in London

45. If you could cast an actor now alive to play you in a new film, what kind of film would it be and who would you choose?

It would be an independent film and I'd choose Alicia Witt, since we already look similar.

46. If you could have your portrait painted by any painter in history, to whom would you give the commission.

Leighton or Waterhouse. Or Botticelli. They were all good with the red heads.

47. If you were given one hour to spend an unlimited amount of money in any store in the world, where would it be?

Tiffany in New York. Then I could sell all of the jewellery and make a bundle.

48. If you could say one sentence to the leader of the country you are presently in, what would you say?

Drop. Dead.

No, wait, don't...then Cheney would be in charge. How about, 'THIS is a dictionary...it has REAL words in it.'

49. If you had to choose the best advertising campaign ever created, which one would it be?

I chose this question because I know what fans we are of advertising here at AVEN.

I choose the I'm a Pepper, are you a Pepper one because it was when I was small and I still remember it.

50. If you could have been any person from history, who would you want to have been?

Hinckly. I wouldn't have missed.

Cate

[Vicious Trollop]

41. If you had to choose the single most valuable thing you ever learned, what would it be?

What makes a real friend; along with that, the realization that no friends is better than false friends. In general, learning not to waste my affection on just anyone.

42. If you could enact one law in your country that does not currently exist, what would it be?

I'm mostly thinking of bad laws I would get rid of: seat belt laws, term limits; I'd decriminalize marijuana. Hmm. Well, I'd get God the hell out of our schools and government once and for all.

43. If you could be the current world champion in any one sport, which sport would it be?

Ice dancing.

44. If you could spend a weekend in any hotel in the world with all expenses paid, which hotel would you choose?

Not really conversant on world-class hotels; I'm more of a hosteler, myself. Put me in, say, Venice or Dublin, but I don't care where I stay.

45. If you could cast an actor now alive to play you in a new film, what kind of film would it be and who would you choose?

Claire Danes is probably my favorite younger actress, though I don't think we look anything alike. Oh well, no one I can think of looks much like me, so give the girl some red hair dye and a curling iron and she'll be good to go. Oh, and it would be something with the feel of a Charlie Kauffman or Wes Anderson film.

46. If you could have your portrait painted by any painter in history, to whom would you give the commission.

John Singer Sergeant. Mostly I just want to be Madame X, I think.

47. If you were given one hour to spend an unlimited amount of money in any store in the world, where would it be?

A used bookshop or record exchange.

48. If you could say one sentence to the leader of the country you are presently in, what would you say?

It's NUCLEAR, not NUCULAR!!!

49. If you had to choose the best advertising campaign ever created, which one would it be?

I really did enjoy those played-out Taco Bell chihuahua spots. Also about 5 years ago Hector Elizondo did half a dozen Mitsubishi ads which were hilaaarious.

50. If you could have been any person from history, who would you want to have been?

Virginia Woolf, Voltaire, Thomas Paine, or Mary Wollstonecraft. Or Emmeline Pankhurst.

[Guest]

41. Be confident my friend, confident.

42. I'd make gay marriage country-wide, and not just in certain provinces.

43. Uh, basketball.

44. Somewhere in Denmark; I've always wanted to go.

45. Keira Knightley, even if she was stupid enough to be in that King Arthur movie and I'm not British. And it would be a...drama, I guess.

46. Monet!

47. One o' those giant CD stores.

48. "Man...what's with the right-wing?! You're the LIBERAL party! Now go, do my bidding."

49. Those bizarre billboards on the side of the road with a vague message that make you wonder what it's about.

50. Che Guevara. Who wouldn't want their face on so much stuff? ;) And the whole being politically cool bit.

[Ellen]

31. If a photograph of one part of your body were to be used in an advertisement, which part would you want to be used, and for what product or service?

Yeah, right. Good one. :lol:

32. If you could bring back any past leader of your country to run the country again, who would you want?

I have to agree with Cate, JFK. However, it would be nice for the leader to be able to absorb and understand the history that's occurred since they were alive, otherwise they might approach things from the societal view of their time.

33. If you could own any building in existence, which would you pick?

Frank Lloyd Wright's Falling Water, or Taliesen.

34. If you could choose exactly what you will eat and drink for your last meal before death, what would the menu consist of?

Hmm . . . 2 grilled catfish filets, yams, green beans and dinner rolls. And actually, it's not a morbid question because we all WILL have a last meal.

35. If you could own any one existing sculpture from anywhere in the world, but not the right to ever sell it, which one would you want?

Well, my knowledge of sculpture is pretty much limited to "The Thinker" and the "Venus Demilo" (sp?). Took a quick look and hard to find anything that had meaning for me. Perhaps the statue of lady justice.

36. If you could have composed any single piece of music that already exists, which would you choose?

Either Rachmaninoff's 'Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini' or John Williams theme to Indiana Jones.

37. If you were invited to join one current musical group, which group would you want to be a member of, and what instrument would you play?

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, drums

38. If you were to receive any existing public award, what award would you like to win?

Pulitzer

39. If you could decide how to spend your last day alive, what would you do?

I would spend my last day on earth with a friend.

40. If you could decide what will be written on your gravestone, what would you have inscribed?

Emily Dickinson's "Hope is the Thing With Feathers"

[Ellen]

Oops . . already falling behind.

41. If you had to choose the single most valuable thing you ever learned, what would it be?

That it's better to see life as a cup half full than half empty. I almost would agree with 'life's not fair' . . but I think it is, just not necessarily how or when we think it is and perhaps not even in our own lifetime. Hey I can 'see' all of you rolling your eyes. :roll:

42. If you could enact one law in your country that does not currently exist, what would it be?

That elections, their campaigns, debates etc are financed with a FIXED amount and the same every election, and that all voters are sent a BOOK (okay, maybe a CD since so many Americans don't read :x ) that talks about the issues in depth. Actually - I would also add that debates are on the radio so that 'looks' doesn't play a part.

43. If you could be the current world champion in any one sport, which sport would it be?

Kung Fu

44. If you could spend a weekend in any hotel in the world with all expenses paid, which hotel would you choose?

Haven't traveled outside the US :cry: But, it would be outside the US.

45. If you could cast an actor now alive to play you in a new film, what kind of film would it be and who would you choose?

Love and heartbreak. Can't think of any actress to play me; but it would require someone with the depth of Hilary Swank.

46. If you could have your portrait painted by any painter in history, to whom would you give the commission.

Norman Rockwell (maybe, although it really plays up my ignorance of painters) :cry:

47. If you were given one hour to spend an unlimited amount of money in any store in the world, where would it be?

Amazon.com

48. If you could say one sentence to the leader of the country you are presently in, what would you say?

Those who don't understand or learn history are doomed to repeat it.

49. If you had to choose the best advertising campaign ever created, which one would it be?

Inventing new coke that was so bad that everyone would start clamoring for 'classic' coke.

50. If you could have been any person from history, who would you want to have been?

Katherine Hepburn

[Silly Green Monkey]

Virago... you'd get rid of seat belt laws?! So that millions more would die? Or do you want to get rid of the morons who wouldn't wear them?

[Davey]

Leaping into the fray..

1. If you were to be granted one wish, what would it be?

To be able to use all the powers I already know I have.

2. If you could suddenly possess an extraordinary talent in one of the arts, what would you like it to be?

I'd like to be able to put the images in my head on paper or canvas exactly.

3. If you could spend one whole night alone with anyone in history, who would you choose?

Jesus. (And my pocket interpreter.)

4. If you could physically transport yourself to any place in the world at this moment, where would you go?

I'd have to get dressed first.. and can I get back?

5. If you could have lived through any war in history (without actually fighting in it), which would it be?

The American Independence one. What was that called? I'd tell the Brits a thing or two about warfare.

6. If you had to eliminate a single type of animal forevermore, which would you choose?

Only one? Fuck. Um. Flies. The big, nasty kind.

7. If you could have an elegant dinner alone with anyone presently alive, whether you know them or not, who would you want it to be?

My father.

8. If you could, in retrospect, change one thing about your childhood, what would it be?

What retrospect? This is it, man! And it's pretty good so far.

9. If you could have any room in the world become your bedroom from now on, which room would you choose?

A bigger one with fluffier pillows. In the place my old one is.

10. If you had to assasinate one famous person who is alive right now, who would it be and how would you do it?

Hmm..! I can't say here. You don't know how many FBI guys are A.

11. If you could have had the starring role in one film already made, which movie would you pick?

I don't know. I think I could be very good in certain movies, but to my knowledge they exist only in my head.

12. If you were to be stranded forever on a desert island and could have only one book to read, which would you want?

Probably 'Escaping Desert Islands For Dummies'. At the risk of sounding like JD. Or.. the screenplay for Cast Away :D

13. If you could have witnessed one event in history, what would you want to have seen?

The Big Bang. From VERY far away.

14. If you could own one painting from any collection in the world but were not allowed to sell it, which work of art would you select?

Don't know enough paintings.

15. If you could have chosen your own first name, other than your current one, what would it be?

God.. I have no idea. Preferably something cool, like Gorax.

But not Gorax.

16. If you had to live the rest of your life in a place that you have never lived before, where would you live?

Western Europe. London.

17. If you were to be recognised by posterity for one thing, what would you like to be known for?

Sending all the idiots to the moon!

18. If you could have said one sentence to Hitler while he was alive, what would you have said?

I'd recite a crazy incantation, summoning an elder god to kick his ass.

19. If you could be guaranteed one thing in life besides money, what would you ask for?

Nuffin'. Life is what you make of it.

20. If you could easily visit one known planet, which one would you go to?

Mars.

21. If you could have been the author of any single book already written, which book would you want to have penned?

It's already written, right? So we're talking about credit? Hmm.. I'm with Cate. Some student-fodder.

22. If you could have any one specific power over other people, what would it be?

Reliable, ultimate persuasion.

23. If you could become famous for doing something that you don't currently do, what would it be?

Being a genius filmmaker or novelist.

24. If you could have lived during one period of time in past history, when and where would it be?

Italy, the Renaissance.

25. If you had to spend one year alone in the wilderness, where would you go?

Into the wilderness. Duh.

26. If you could possess one supernatural ability, what would it be?

Precognition.

27. If you could forever eliminate one specific type of prejudice from the earth, which would it be?

Ageism.

28. If your home were to be totally destroyed by fire but you could save just one thing, what would it be?

Me, obviously.

29. If you were to have your friends, in private, attribute a single quality to you, what would you want it to be?

Wisdom.

30. If you had to kill someone you know, who would it be, and how would you do it?

Who isn't important, but it would involve lots psychological torture and a soldering iron.

31. If a photograph of one part of your body were to be used in an advertisement, which part would you want to be used, and for what product or service?

My bleeding heart. I don't know what for :D

32. If you could bring back any past leader of your country to run the country again, who would you want?

Trudeau, of course. He'd fix the planet right up. Yessir.

33. If you could own any building in existence, which would you pick?

The fucking Parthenon.

34. If you could choose exactly what you will eat and drink for your last meal before death, what would the menu consist of?

Life-prolonging elixer :D No, it would be a really fine rack of back ribs, a good baseball steak, a basket of fresh fish and chips, and a bowl of hot chicken soup with lots of knaidlach :lol:

35. If you could own any one existing sculpture from anywhere in the world, but not the right to ever sell it, which one would you want?

The Washington Monument.

36. If you could have composed any single piece of music that already exists, which would you choose?

Karma Police, previously by Radiohead.

37. If you were invited to join one current musical group, which group would you want to be a member of, and what instrument would you play?

They Might Be Giants, voice.

38. If you were to receive any existing public award, what award would you like to win?

Is there a Public Enemy award?

39. If you could decide how to spend your last day alive, what would you do?

I would kill everyone who has ever wronged me by slow torture and eat a great deal.

40. If you could decide what will be written on your gravestone, what would you have inscribed?

"Look behind you."

41. If you had to choose the single most valuable thing you ever learned, what would it be?

You're not intrinsically better than me because you're older. You can be wrong, and I can be right. (Summary: ageism is bullshit.)

42. If you could enact one law in your country that does not currently exist, what would it be?

A national eugenics program :twisted:

43. If you could be the current world champion in any one sport, which sport would it be?

Brockian Ultra-Cricket.

44. If you could spend a weekend in any hotel in the world with all expenses paid, which hotel would you choose?

The Ritz.

45. If you could cast an actor now alive to play you in a new film, what kind of film would it be and who would you choose?

God.. I don't know enough actors. Especially young ones. Um.. me? :D I pass.

46. If you could have your portrait painted by any painter in history, to whom would you give the commission.

See above.

47. If you were given one hour to spend an unlimited amount of money in any store in the world, where would it be?

Hmm..! First answer was honestly 'my butcher's' - but nah. I think probably a jeweler of some kind - I'd pawn off all the stuff when my hour was over!

48. If you could say one sentence to the leader of the country you are presently in, what would you say?

Don't fuck up again, Paulie.. I'm watching you.

49. If you had to choose the best advertising campaign ever created, which one would it be?

The WWII-era propaganda-style Hoover ads. Or, more contemporary, the Crown Royal ad - "A manly way to say 'I love you'".

50. If you could have been any person from history, who would you want to have been?

God?

Phew. Edited to add italics.