For those who identify as cupiosexual or cupioromantic

[asexualien]

PLEASE DO NOT COMMENT IF YOU DON’T IDENTIFY AS EITHER ONE OF THOSE. IM LOOKING TO HEAR FROM CUPIOSEXUALS AND CUPIOROMANTICS ONLY!! 
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I know what the definitions are for both, but I still question where my parts of my identity specifically lie on the aro and ace spectrums. 
 

If you identify as either of those, how did you know? What makes being cupio different from being allo? 
 

I have my own thoughts on the sexual attraction vs desire thing, so I wonder if any other cupios see things the same as me. I’m not going to say specifically what it is though because the last thing I want to is this to turn into some kind of debate. That isn’t what this post is for. 
 

I just want to hear more from cupios because I feel like I don’t hear about experiences from those that identify with these labels. 

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ONCE AGAIN, PLEASE DO NOT COMMENT IF YOU DON’T IDENTIFY AS EITHER ONE OF THOSE. IM LOOKING TO HEAR FROM CUPIOSEXUALS AND CUPIOROMANTICS ONLY!! 

also, sorry if this isn’t the correct section to put this in. 

[Monke Jimmy]

Well, there's one concept that is experiencing romantic attraction. It's usually apparent when you are romantically attracted to someone and want to be in a relationship with that specific person. It's another thing to just want that kind of relationship in general. It's a difference of "I want to date that person" and "I wish I was on a date with someone." For me, I see romantic opportunities when I'm on a walk at sunset, etc., and I wish I could share them with someone, and it makes me lonely. When I think about it, though, I don't know a single person I would want to fill that role. 

 

I think that allos feel this feeling sometimes, of wanting a certain type of experience or relationship but not having anyone in mind, and then they find someone who might fill that fantasy. That's why I make the distinction between wanting a relationship and wanting a person. Someone who identifies as cupio- usually only wants the former. Someone who is allo at least wants the latter.