Someone from this board was misunderstood on my OCD board

[Mark from the OCD board]

@ square peg: Glad I could help! I think there are many, many reasons not to ingest caffeine just as there are many, many reasons not to smoke.

Years ago, one of my professors claimed that more than half/perhaps most of all great thinkers, artists, and writers had issues or mental disorders. I cannot argue this either way, but it does make sense--and there are indeed a lot of learned people past and present for whom it is true.

@ maufry: IDIC, huh? Too cool!

Since I was born in 1965, I watched some of the original series in its first run from my father's lap. At the time, though, I understood nothing.

I have seen every episode of every series, but I find that my views differ from those of many Trekkers. I, for one, liked Voyager and Enterprise, the last two series, although I admit that a large number of episodes in both shows were uninteresting. I also tend to adore minor characters more than major ones, and my favorites include Guinan (want her as a friend!), Q (too cool!), Lwaxana Troi (again, too cool!), Ro Laren (yet again, too cool!), Mr. Riley (the yummiest guy on TOS), Garak (never know what to expect!), Kai Winn (love to hate her!), Gul Dukat (intrigue!)... Of the major characters, I go for McCoy, Scotty, Uhura, Janeway, Paris, B'Elanna, Hoshi, and Archer.

Unlike most Trek fans, I hate Kirk and think the series would have been better off without him. I horrified people on my Star Trek board by wishing that Janeway and not Kirk had been paired with Spock, McCoy, and gang. I then suggested, to quite a few groans, that a restrained, never sexual pairing between Janeway and Spock would have been much better than Chapel/Spock and Janeway/Chakotay.

A lot of people have little quirks that may or may not be OCD. The question to ask about yours: Are they little things here and there that are annoying but only sometimes interfere with daily life, or do they cause you high anxiety, constant rumination, and the loss of considerable time and/or efficiency? The former is what most of society experiences; the latter is OCD.

@ stationary: What wonderful feedback! Thanks for the message. :)

[cijay]

I missed your post first time around, Mark because I don't often read the Partners, Friends & Allies forum so I'm glad that I popped in.

The understanding and extension of friendship towards asexuality is very heartwarming and I thank you sincerely. Most overwhelming is the dedication and compassion you showed by coming here to see if you could find the person who was misunderstood on the OCD board. I hope you found him/her.

Just to answer your question (tho' it really wasn't a question), as a 44 year old asexual woman. I have found any prejudices or smears from any community about it, gay or straight. My personal experiences have been positive. I have been met with disbelief on a few occasions but because they were only one-way communication (either on line or some 'expert' on the telly) so I don't count them. I think I'd disappoint them anyway because I'm not about to waste oxygen and time telling them anything about me. But mostly, reactions - and I've been in 3 paper articles, an internet one (soon to be another one) and a TV show so I'm about as 'out' as I can get - have been very positive.

Drop by our 'old farts' forum too LOL.

[Mark from the OCD board]

My pleasure, cijay. I am really glad to read that you have had so many positive experiences and that you are so 'out' as an asexual. More power to you! :)

Yes, the person from this board ---finally--- saw my posts and sent me a private message; he is now posting again on the OCD board. Now that folks there understand what asexuality is, he should have no problem.

It's ironic: I simultaneously explained asexuality on an OCD board and OCD on an asexuality board. My head hurts! ;) I am sooooooo outside my field...

I guess it only goes to show that people from different communities can indeed understand and learn from each other (he says, having just finished a pointless battle with a homophobic Fundamentalist on the OCD board).

Now, if only I can stop procrastinating (and, in between reading super-hero comic books, stop saving the universe from the forces of dastardly ignorance and Fundamentalism...? ;) ), I really should get some work done.

Once I do that, I will take a look at the old farts' section. In addition, I have a mental draft for a new thread for this section: "Understanding asexuality: From a sexual to other sexuals." I wanted to do something for this forum, and I think it will be a welcome contribution.

[cijay]

In addition, I have a mental draft for a new thread for this section: "Understanding asexuality: From a sexual to other sexuals." I wanted to do something for this forum, and I think it will be a welcome contribution.

This could be put to VERY good use in AVENues! You've probably already found it but

http://www.asexuality.org/home/index.php?o...4&Itemid=46

[Mark from the OCD board]

This could be put to VERY good use in AVENues! You've probably already found it but

http://www.asexuality.org/home/index.php?o...4&Itemid=46

I am not familiar with AVENues, cijay, but you (and everyone else) are welcome to copy any or all of my article and use it in any way that will help the asexual community.

It took me a while, but I finally finished writing it. (Keeping it so short was hard, as I had a lot to say.) Here it is:

http://www.asexuality.org/discussion/viewt...p=625259#625259

[Tom Nook]

Just wanted to tag this topic and thank Mark for the excellent info on OCD. I've had (non-diagnosed) germ OCD for almost 10 years now, and found the info to be helpful. I'll take a look at the books you recommended..

ps: Noticed also Mark that you mentioned earlier that you're Arab? Nice to see another 'round here. (though I'm only just half Arab really, haha)

[Mark from the OCD board]

Just wanted to tag this topic and thank Mark for the excellent info on OCD. I've had (non-diagnosed) germ OCD for almost 10 years now, and found the info to be helpful. I'll take a look at the books you recommended..

ps: Noticed also Mark that you mentioned earlier that you're Arab? Nice to see another 'round here. (though I'm only just half Arab really, haha)

Hey there!

I am also half Arab: half Lebanese (mother's side), a quarter Sicilian, and a quarter Swedish. How's that for a mix? :)

As you can see in the picture in my avatar, I can pass for Mediterranean--but definitely not Scandinavian. :lol:

[maufry]

Since I was born in 1965, I watched some of the original series in its first run from my father's lap. At the time, though, I understood nothing.

My dad and I watched TOS in sindication before TNG came out. I was only about 6 at the time, so I didn't understand that the series had been over for a couple of decades. When they got rid of its time slot, I was devastated - I thought they had cancelled the series!

Ensign Ro was my favorite TNG character, too!! I haven't seen all the episodes of any of the series except TNG, though. I will eventually - I plan to own them all some day. But that will take a lot of money, and therefore time, lol.

A lot of people have little quirks that may or may not be OCD. The question to ask about yours: Are they little things here and there that are annoying but only sometimes interfere with daily life, or do they cause you high anxiety, constant rumination, and the loss of considerable time and/or efficiency? The former is what most of society experiences; the latter is OCD.

Nah, I don't really have anything that could be diagnosed as OCD, I don't think. With the possible exception of my CDs (and DVDs, actually). My CDs MUST be perfectly straight when I put them back in their cases. It doesn't really cause me much trouble simply b/c I live alone, and I always put my CDs in their cases "properly." I did, however, put one in crooked one time, as an experiment. I wanted to see how much it would bother me. I was in college at the time, so I put the CD in its case cockeyed and then left for class. I got about a block from the apartment before turning around to go back home and fix it. I knew it would bug me for the rest of the day if I didn't. Some of my cases are wobbly and I know that the CD rotates once I put it in there, but as long as it's straight when I put it in the case, then I just don't think about it. I tell myself that it's out of my control, so I can't worry about it. It does bug me sometimes, but not enough that I would try to fix it, since I know I can't. But like I said, it doesn't really cause me any grief just b/c I always put them in straight. Now, if I lived with someone who was constantly putting my CDs and DVDs in their cases crooked, that would drive me insane. I would probably come home every day and check them all, just to straighten them out, lol. Woe to the guy that ever decides to move in with me, he'll have to deal with my CD obsession, lol.

[Mark from the OCD board]

Ensign Ro fans of the world unite!!! :) :) :)

In other words...

Hi, maufry!

As I think I mentioned before, everyone has some small obsessive and/or compulsive traits. That's part of being human. Your CD case story is the same as mine, but in you it is just being overly organized while in me it has the potential to be much more serious if I don't make sure not to take it to ridiculous levels.

As far as my being a neat freak... Here's my apartment when it's MESSY... (unmade bed, things hanging on doorknobs, random pillows thrown on the couch...) ;)

The real proof is my closet... :lol:

Now, if I lived with someone who was constantly putting my CDs and DVDs in their cases crooked...

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! :shock: :shock: :shock:

Or even worse, as my best friend does... In the WRONG cases, so that you have to look through dozens of DVD cases to find the one movie you want...

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! :shock: :shock: :shock:

:lol:

Again, in me, this is an OCD thing I have to control so it does not get out of hand. (Showing you my apartment in a "messy" state is actually good behavior therapy for me. I don't have to be perfect, and neither does my apartment...)

In the mainstream (non-OCD) population, this trait is nothing to worry about. You can be a neat freak without having OCD.

[BunnyK.]

Mark....

If you think that's messy....

All I have to say is wow. :shock:

If I knew how, I'd put a slideshow I once made up on the internet so you could see it. It was my apartment before and after cleaning....but I think after probably 6 hours of intensive cleaning, my apartment was STILL not as clean as yours is in those pictures!

[Placebo]

Mark....

If you think that's messy....

All I have to say is wow. :shock:

If I knew how, I'd put a slideshow I once made up on the internet so you could see it. It was my apartment before and after cleaning....but I think after probably 6 hours of intensive cleaning, my apartment was STILL not as clean as yours is in those pictures!

Seconded.

Sometimes I think that doing cell culture in my lab will make me start developing OCD traits-- ;) Everything is so specialized, you have to spray off your gloves in a certain way, flame bottles before and after opening them, leave the bottle caps up, not touch pipettes to the sides of bottles. . .

[maufry]

My apartment has never been that clean. Ever.

You wanna come do mine??? :lol:

[Kawaii_Neko]

Mark, you have an absolutely charming apartment! ^_^

My mother-in-law is OCD but under lots o' medication for it. So I've seen what it can do. Congrats on having it under your control and keep up the good work! Thank you for sharing that with us. I'd show you the before and after pictures from my move if I had access at the moment, but since I'm still at work, it'll have to wait. You'd be horrified at the state the apartment we're in was left when we moved in! :lol:

[Mark from the OCD board]

Apartment...

Many thanks!

@Bunny K.: Do you watch Friends? I am Monica. Like her, I find it impossible to be sloppy.

In the university in which I used to work before I was hired by the one in which I presently teach, my boss often sent me memos and then lost her own copies. I thus had to send her back photocopies of her own memos (her frequent request). She also used my personal cross-referenced files instead of hers when she needed something from years ago...

I used to drive my parents crazy when I was living at home, as they are incredibly sloppy--and I even yelled at them once when they tracked dirt on the floor I had just mopped. (Isn't it usually the other way around? :lol: ) My friends were amazed that the whole house, except for my bedroom, was always in a chaotic state--and this despite my keeping the bathrooms sparkling and doing surface cleaning elsewhere. There was nothing I could do about the million chachkas or the piles everywhere, some of which would occasionally fall with a crash in the middle of the night. My mother was even injured once--fortunately not seriously--when a pile came crashing down on her head and knocked her down.

In my old bedroom (as in my office or in my apartment now), I could close my eyes and still tell you where everything was--even the contents of each drawer.

So... Is this OCD or am I just a neat freak? Actually, I think it is a little of both. I used to have some of the weird OCD rituals surrounding folding laundry and scouring, but I no longer do that. I believe I would have been a neat freak even without the OCD, though, so as long as I don't get too crazy it does not threaten my OCD control.

@ Placebo. I am a liberal arts professor, and I teach in a typically emotional liberal arts style--but my personality is closer to that of a scientist. In fact, one math professor even told me that I should have gone into math or science. The only problem is that even with tutoring I barely passed math and science; I have always had a hard time with them. On the other hand, language, literature, history, and the rest come easily to me.

My sister, however, finds all subjects easy; she's the math teacher. She will never let me forget my reponse on a biology test when I was 14 or 15.

Question: What are the four chemical bases found in DNA?

My answer: hydrogen, helium, nitrogen, and oxygen

@ maufry: Like Monica, I get emotional and controlling about cleaning, so you might not want me cleaning your place unless you know me very well and already know my good qualities. I can be too controlling when I want to organize something... :oops:

@ Kawaii_Neko: Many thanks! Nothing here is expensive since my salary is not that great, but I have tried hard. Some of the antiques belonged to my grandparents. Would you believe that they did not want them? I am usually the one who throws things away easily to avoid clutter, but not those babies.

[Placebo]

@ Placebo. I am a liberal arts professor, and I teach in a typically emotional liberal arts style--but my personality is closer to that of a scientist. In fact, one math professor even told me that I should have gone into math or science. The only problem is that even with tutoring I barely passed math and science; I have always had a hard time with them. On the other hand, language, literature, history, and the rest come easily to me.

He he he; how ironic. ;) I was always better at language and literature and history than math and science. Career choices are funny things. ;)