Still a Virgin

[Littleface]

On 7/29/2020 at 5:55 PM, Jade Cross said:

Over time, I've had difficulty understanding the "lost" phrasing the this gets.

 

As far as I know, way, and I mean WAY too many people get so caught up in the whole "need to get rid of it", without the additional pressure from peers, only to, in many times, regret their decision. And even if they didn't, it's still an unsual way to phrase something you (as in general sense, not pointing out anyone in particular here); were in such desperate hurry to get over with.

 

Add to that, that it takes one successful attempt to say you are no longer a virgin but, as pointed out previously, this is a pass time, you don't get anything out if it in tangible terms. You don't become "woke", I mean unless you consider the disappointment that it wasn't all it was cracked up to be as one; after doing it, you don't gain some otherworldly amount of information or insight, no gold start, heck with how much pressure there is to throw away virginity, you would think there would be some amazing gift at the end if it. If anything, getting rid of it seems to be more of a pressure to maintain the status quo than anything else.

 

 

 

 

 

I am the same, I dislike the phrasing of 'lost' that insinuates you are giving something up. What, i don't know? Innocence? Some  piece of skin if you are biologically female? Both kinda seem redundant imo. I dislike the pedestal that so called virginity is placed on as some moniker of being a sign of innocence. I'd done sexual stuff before then that wasn't PIV, does that somehow still make me innocent? I wouldn't think so. 

[Lord Jade Cross]

11 hours ago, Littleface said:

I am the same, I dislike the phrasing of 'lost' that insinuates you are giving something up. What, i don't know? Innocence? Some  piece of skin if you are biologically female? Both kinda seem redundant imo. I dislike the pedestal that so called virginity is placed on as some moniker of being a sign of innocence. I'd done sexual stuff before then that wasn't PIV, does that somehow still make me innocent? I wouldn't think so. 

 

But yeah, I was honestly just curious. I'm a very curious person and if it wasn't for the fact I suffered CSA I'd of probably lost it sooner, like I say I was well into my 20's when I lost it. I'm almost 25 now and I lost it at 23.

 

CW:  Light discussion of Sexual Abuse

 

 

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Admittedly I had a complex about my virginity for a long time as it being the only 'thing' I had left that wasn't taken from me as a child. It was the first time I experienced something sexual as an adult and it be 'mine' and done on 'my terms'. Everything else other than PIV I'd had taken away from me so it wasn't special. So I'm probably not the best example in that regard for an average layman and views on virginity lol.

 

 

But I agree, on a societal level the impression people are given that if they haven't experienced sex yet they are somehow missing out or at a disadvantage in some way is kinda stupid. 

Actually, I understand the feeling of wanting for things to be done on ones own terms, even if it's not sex specifically what I would be referring to. But even if it was the case, I would also wish for it to happen on my terms. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[MakeupJunkie4]

On 7/20/2020 at 7:52 AM, Elise Jennings said:

It should change in religion where it's okay to do some self-discovery, but at the same time make it in society to where it's okay not to have done anything.

I was raised in church and have seen both the pitfalls of purity culture and also of virgin-shaming outside of religion, so I can get behind this. However, I think the focus should be (whether in or out of religion) should be RESPONSIBILITY. Not shaming or judging, just...educating youth about what's what, and the risks of this, that and the other, and not to let society pressure you. I don't think it's a great idea to broadcast everyone's sex lives - I think that's something private and should be kept somewhat confidential, but honestly what teens need most is education BEFORE trying anything, and to be made aware of their personal responsibility in whatever they choose to do (obvs rape and abuse are not included in that).

[Madelise]

8 hours ago, MakeupJunkie444 said:

I was raised in church and have seen both the pitfalls of purity culture and also of virgin-shaming outside of religion, so I can get behind this. However, I think the focus should be (whether in or out of religion) should be RESPONSIBILITY. Not shaming or judging, just...educating youth about what's what, and the risks of this, that and the other, and not to let society pressure you. I don't think it's a great idea to broadcast everyone's sex lives - I think that's something private and should be kept somewhat confidential, but honestly what teens need most is education BEFORE trying anything, and to be made aware of their personal responsibility in whatever they choose to do (obvs rape and abuse are not included in that).

Absolutely!