DogObsessedLi Posted September 1, 2019 Share Posted September 1, 2019 Thanks Puck for these. I've always been a little reluctant to post sex-related questions on Aven as when I've asked anything it always turns heated and generally unhelpful. I am potentially grey-ace, though to most people I just say ace because it saves a tonne of explanation, esp as I'm aromantic and nothing grey about that. In a nutshell, I've often found men in uniforms or smartwear sexually attractive, unless it's just very strong admiration, and I've rarely seen a celebrity as "hot" (I can think only of one). But it's all sort of "in theory only attraction", if that is such a thing and is generally extremely rare attraction at best (which would be greyace of course). And even then, I'm totally repulsed by a lot of things like oral, but then some alloro allosex people describe certain aspects of sex as "intimate" and "romantic", that then gets me totally confused. All I know is that it's extremely rare, and definitely no romantic attraction mixed in! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
lost-the-key Posted April 2, 2020 Share Posted April 2, 2020 Great post. I already intuitively knew I wasn’t a greysexual after all and this post confirmed it in five minutes. Thank you! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
justme6565 Posted April 18, 2020 Share Posted April 18, 2020 Thanks so much! I've recently started questioning certain aspects of my sexuality, and have potentially landed on Gray-A as something that might work for me, so I really do appreciate having this space. (The rest of AVEN has also been an amazing resource! But it often feels like things apply to me...until they don't. As in: I can count the number of times I've felt attraction on one hand...but I'm fairly certain they were indeed instances of attraction, so ya know. It's nice to have this space!) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WobblyWallaby Posted November 15, 2020 Share Posted November 15, 2020 ..... I've identified as Grey since coming to terms with being asexual....though I did it not so much for myself as for others. By that I mean I wasn't totally averse when it came to the idea of sex, it just wasn't something I was actively seeking out....but then last year I sought it out a little bit. Not the whole shabang but up until that point I had nothing under my belt, and I was the one to went for it, who wanted it. I regretted it after. It upset me for a long time. It still does technically. And I'm confused. I still think I'm grey/ace but I feel like I inched down the scale away from who I was. I'm not sure if I'm okay with that....and I only have myself to blame for this transition. Talking with friends has not helped me. Talking to the guy I was with definitely hasn't. He thinks it was something he did to make me have such a negative reaction when he was wonderfully kind and careful to me ...I'm thankful to him because without him it may have been more traumatic... I don't know what I want from this... I guess just to release it. What I really want is to go back and not open this can of worms. So I am less ace than I thought. I should just accept that. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
omg_its_rachel Posted May 28, 2021 Share Posted May 28, 2021 can you be gray-sexual and heteroflexible, both? i'm leaning towards those definitions for myself, do they cancel each other out? do i have to choose 1? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BiDemi Posted June 6, 2021 Share Posted June 6, 2021 On 5/28/2021 at 4:50 PM, omg_its_rachel said: can you be gray-sexual and heteroflexible, both? i'm leaning towards those definitions for myself, do they cancel each other out? do i have to choose 1? You can be both, they don't cancel each other out. Gray-sexual relates to the spectrum between allosexual and asexual (how frequently/strongly/consistently you feel sexual attraction), while heteroflexible would relate to the spectrum of who you are attracted to, from opposite sex to same sex. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rosendust Posted September 27, 2023 Share Posted September 27, 2023 I'm grey-a, and my gf is such a sexual being(*i.e.-high sex drive than I*), but she seems understanding of my grey-a needs but I just feel like she's pushy sometimes and we've had a conversation but I still don't think she understands how much it means to me that she gets it. Help? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
red black ninja Posted April 19 Share Posted April 19 Hello. Demisexual and Greysexual. Figuring out out 😊 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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