“LOVE” What does it mean?

[rrahibe]

really need to know..

[Sarah-Sylvia]

Care, and what makes you happy.

[Ceebs]

Deep affection and care, mostly.

[DemonicEnby]

Deep care, affection, wanting to do things for the loved ones to help them, make them comfortable, sometimes small presents and some such. For instance an inane coffee mug with a funny quote coz they'd like it. Pretty similar in the romantic and familiar sense, at least to me.

[Milque Toast]

We recently had this discussion in English (since we're doing Romeo and Juliet..), honestly I was pretty shocked by most of my classmates' responses.

All of their suggestions were strictly in the romantic sense, and could not see "love" as a thing that happens between friends, acquaintances, etc, and no one really mentioned family but I assume they understand that families love each other.

 

I mean, it's obvious because I'm aromantic, but I see love as a broad spectrum. There are so many ways and degrees you can love someone, and it isn't one strict definition or way it is done. You can love someone for an infinite amount of reasons and I don't like saying love only comes in one form.

 

The obvious ones are romantic (and sexual?) love, which, I have trouble defining, but I know it's something I'm not interested in. Plus, I'm pretty sure most romantic people would know what it feels like.

 

Platonic love, between friends; familial love, between family and spouses; alterous love, can be separate from any common types of love or somewhere between; even aesthetic love, the admiration of someone (but zero desire for them). Even just general attachment, however you want to define it, I would call love. 

Ironically, I see love all around me and between me and all the people I know.

 

But, I still keep in mind that everyone views and experiences love differently, and have different thresholds before they would say they "love" someone. (And obviously I don't go around telling my friends I love them all the time, but I have done so)

 

In my opinion, everyone sees and defines love differently. That's what's so mysterious about it, and why a lot of people have a strong fascination for it.

 

[Star Crossed Loner]

I made a post about romantic love last week: 

 

[Ceebs]

19 minutes ago, DemonicSister said:

sometimes small presents and some such. For instance an inane coffee mug with a funny quote coz they'd like it. Pretty similar in the romantic and familiar sense, at least to me.

Or a box of tools cos you don't own any lol.

 

Sounds hella unromantic, but then my partner bought me a box of tools for that exact reason recently, and somehow it seemed very romantic. 😂 I guess because it's showing care, care for a need that I had -- that particular need being owning tools lol.

[binary suns]

I have no idea what love is. tbh.

 

but google says, love is 

 

1: a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person

2: attraction that includes sexual desire : the strong affection felt by people who have a romantic relationship

 

and in case you wanna know what affection for a person means, 

a feeling of liking and caring for someone or something : tender attachment : fondness 

 

 

 

 

I'll go ahead and follow this thread, I wanna know what love is too!

[Ceebs]

I've long maintained that the actual love component of a relationship -- when it's genuine, full love -- is not particularly different regardless of what type of relationship it is. Romantic relationship, close platonic friendship, familial connection, whatever. Love is love. When you have a romantic relationship with someone, which is generally also a sexual relationship for people who aren't asexual, you have romantic feelings and sexual feelings for them. If it's purely platonic or familial, there's obviously no romance or sexual desire; those are additional components that are exclusive to non-platonic relationships. But can I differentiate strongly between the love I felt for my gran (well, still feel, even though she's no longer alive) and the love I feel for my partner? Not really? These are very different relationships with very different people, but the components of the love I feel are more or less the same. Just with the romantic and sexual stuff added on with my partner. Otherwise it's still deep affection and care and empathy for someone whose existence means a whole lot to me and whose presence in my life has been invaluable.

[Ceebs]

Also there are different levels of 'love' for sure. I know my love for my gran and my partner are different than any other experiences of love I've ever had. I don't love my parents the same way for sure. I don't know quite what I feel for them, really. I may or may not have loved my first partner. I liked him (and still do), but I'm not sure about love. I felt like I loved my second partner but it was hard to untangle that feeling from some sort of toxic draw, and I don't think I liked her that much... so maybe it wasn't love. I feel something I can only really describe as love for a friendly acquaintance of mine, even though I'm not super close to him. I loved one of my pets, but I'm not really sure about the others.

 

So it varies.

[Guest]

"Love" means almost nothing at all, in much the same way that "hate" is rather meaningless. The words once carried more weight, but are overused to the point of meaninglessness now. 

 

 

[Morays]

One of my all-time favorite movies is Ladybird, and I come back to this one particular scene a lot.

 

Ladybird has written an essay about Sacramento, her hometown, for college. She's sitting down with one of the nuns at her Catholic school, who just having read it, exclaims "you must really love Sacramento." Ladybird visibly flinches in surprise; she's spent the entire film trying to escape and move to the east coast.

 

Nun: "You don't think so?"

 

Her "I guess I pay attention..."

 

Nun: "Aren't those the same thing? Love, and attention?"

 

...

 

I think the simplest way to put it is that paying attention to something or someone shows care, and love is the deepest form of caring. Most everything on top of that is cultural and contextual, but caring deeply is always the core.