Aromantic or Something Else?

[The Roomba Chicken]

I was unsure what to name this so apologies for the odd title!

 

Anyways, I've made a lot of posts over the past few months trying to figure out my romantic orientation and I thought I'd figured it out but it turns out maybe not...

I'm not too sure how to word this, so sorry if this is confusing.

 

I feel like I could be aromantic. I've never actually had a real ~crush~ (as far as I know). The only person I've considered to be a crush was this person who was a bit older than me. Nothing too drastic but the age gap was enough that thinking about them romantically felt wrong. I suppose I may have just looked up to them if I wasn't romantically attracted to them? 

When I was just starting secondary school, I realised everyone was talking about their crushes and some people even started dating. I felt left out. I used to make up having crushes to try fit in more, but that just lead to people shipping the random guys I chose and myself which made me feel suuuuuper uncomfortable.

When we used to play truth or dare, no one would believe me when I said I didn't like anyone. I remember sitting for what felt like hours having a bunch of girls pestering me to give them a name.

Another thing (I'm not sure if it really changes anything but just in case), I've always had a strong hatred for the words boyfriend, girlfriend and datefriend, they make me uncomfortable?

 

I feel like I'd want a relationship in the future but at the same time, it doesn't feel like something I'd do, if that makes sense?

I've read up (and asked around here) about Queer Platonic Relationships and they seem like something I'd be comfortable with! If anyone reading this is in a QPR (or not), maybe you could tell me a bit about what it means to you, it may help!

 

I've thought about this a heap and I realise I'd probably have to get into a proper, exclusive, serious romantic relationship before I can actually figure this out, but I'm super impatient and a bit of knowledge can't hurt!

Thank you for your time!

[Eziio]

If you feel like you want a relationship but can't develop the feelings then you should try look at cupioromantic.

 

But you said you feel uncomfortable with romantic relationship associated labels,sounds more like aromantic.

 

Maybe try testing out a QPR and see how you feel! Trying a romantic relationship to figure this out is more likely to hurt both you and the person involved.

[Guest]

8 hours ago, Eziio said:

If you feel like you want a relationship but can't develop the feelings then you should try look at cupioromantic.

 

But you said you feel uncomfortable with romantic relationship associated labels,sounds more like aromantic.

 

Maybe try testing out a QPR and see how you feel! Trying a romantic relationship to figure this out is more likely to hurt both you and the person involved.

 

I'm in the same boat. Realizing and understanding that I'm asexual was surprisingly simply for the most part. But as far as my romantic orientation, I've been wracking my brain trying to get a handle on it. I went from thinking I was grey-romantic, to demi-romantic, to finally settling on aromantic. I've never really wanted a romantic relationship nor felt romantic attraction, but I've always liked the idea of some form of companionship, if only a step or so beyond friendship. I don't think I quite fit being cupioromantic, but a QPR does seem interesting, at least conceptually.

 

Trying a romantic relationship may not be a good idea. The other person will likely assume/feel more than you may be comfortable with. I was once in that situation and I still feel guilty about unintentionally leading the other person on. I thought I wanted a relationship and so I put myself in that scenario thinking whatever feelings I was supposed to have would form. but they never did. In the end, it was the other person who was hurt, and although at the time I didn't know I was asexual, it still wasn't fair to them. 

[Eziio]

1 hour ago, Greywulf said:

 

I'm in the same boat. Realizing and understanding that I'm asexual was surprisingly simply for the most part. But as far as my romantic orientation, I've been wracking my brain trying to get a handle on it. I went from thinking I was grey-romantic, to demi-romantic, to finally settling on aromantic. I've never really wanted a romantic relationship nor felt romantic attraction, but I've always liked the idea of some form of companionship, if only a step or so beyond friendship. I don't think I quite fit being cupioromantic, but a QPR does seem interesting, at least conceptually.

 

Trying a romantic relationship may not be a good idea. The other person will likely assume/feel more than you may be comfortable with. I was once in that situation and I still feel guilty about unintentionally leading the other person on. I thought I wanted a relationship and so I put myself in that scenario thinking whatever feelings I was supposed to have would form. but they never did. In the end, it was the other person who was hurt, and although at the time I didn't know I was asexual, it still wasn't fair to them. 

Yeah,

i got into a relationship whilst doubting my romantic orientation and it felt horrible to see them hurt after my realisation.

 

ive been searching for a QPR for a bit now and honestly it’s harder than finding a bf/gf xD

or at least one that fits what I’d want to do 

[Guest]

13 hours ago, Eziio said:

ive been searching for a QPR for a bit now and honestly it’s harder than finding a bf/gf xD

or at least one that fits what I’d want to do

Yeah, it does seem like a difficult thing to find. I wish you luck.