spiritedawaygirl Posted August 26, 2017 Share Posted August 26, 2017 For one thing, the thought of sex terrifies me and just thinking about it makes me shudder. I don't like shirts that expose my stomach and anything that exposes myself, I don't like overall super tight pants (some pants are OK, not all), and I'm not interested in a relationship as of the moment. Does that sound like I'm asexual? I always that I was a normal female who would get married and have kids with a husband, but I don't know now what I am. Forgive me if I'm not very informed here. Can somebody be religious and be asexual? I'm a fairly consistent religious person, so am I wrong to think that something is wrong with me? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ryan_ Posted August 26, 2017 Share Posted August 26, 2017 It's possible that you are asexual. The definition of asexuality is as follows: the lack of desire for sex and/or partnered sex. It could also be defined as feeling no sexual attraction (to any person). You have to think about whether this really applies to you. The clothing thing is a matter of preference. Some people like to wear basically nothing and some people don't. It doesn't really have anything to do with your sexual orientation. Being uninterested in a relationship could be a sign of something different, aromanticism. This is similar to asexuality, however, it is the lack of romantic attraction rather than sexual. Or maybe it's just that you don't want a relationship at the moment. You can be religious and basically anything else. Your religion doesn't define your sexuality. Not feeling sexual attraction doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong with you. It's perfectly normal. Anyway, welcome! I'm sure an admod will come along and help direct you to places sooner or later, but here's my hello. Spoiler 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
spiritedawaygirl Posted August 26, 2017 Author Share Posted August 26, 2017 3 minutes ago, ryan_ said: It's possible that you are asexual. The definition of asexuality is as follows: the lack of desire for sex and/or partnered sex. It could also be defined as feeling no sexual attraction (to any person). You have to think about whether this really applies to you. The clothing thing is a matter of preference. Some people like to wear basically nothing and some people don't. It doesn't really have anything to do with your sexual orientation. Being uninterested in a relationship could be a sign of something different, aromanticism. This is similar to asexuality, however, it is the lack of romantic attraction rather than sexual. Or maybe it's just that you don't want a relationship at the moment. You can be religious and basically anything else. Your religion doesn't define your sexuality. Not feeling sexual attraction doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong with you. It's perfectly normal. Anyway, welcome! I'm sure an admod will come along and help direct you to places sooner or later, but here's my hello. Reveal hidden contents Hey. Thanks! Someone had told me that they really think that I'm asexual. I had suspected it a few years ago when I realized that I didn't fit with a good majority of my friends over my possible sexual orientation. The thought is coming right back as if to ask myself: "Am I asexual?" The definition you listed above pretty much describes me and since it applies to me, does it mean that I'm asexual? I always thought up until more recent years that I was just a straight female, nothing more. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ryan_ Posted August 26, 2017 Share Posted August 26, 2017 7 minutes ago, spiritedawaygirl said: Hey. Thanks! Someone had told me that they really think that I'm asexual. I had suspected it a few years ago when I realized that I didn't fit with a good majority of my friends over my possible sexual orientation. The thought is coming right back as if to ask myself: "Am I asexual?" The definition you listed above pretty much describes me and since it applies to me, does it mean that I'm asexual? I always thought up until more recent years that I was just a straight female, nothing more. If it applies to you, then you may consider yourself asexual. Your label is up to you, though, so neither this "someone" nor I may tell you exactly what you are. But I'm glad to have helped, anyway 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted August 26, 2017 Share Posted August 26, 2017 5 hours ago, spiritedawaygirl said: The thought of sex terrifies me. I don't like cloths that expose me; crop tops, super tight pants (some pants are OK, not all). And I'm not interested in a relationship as of the moment. Can somebody be religious and be asexual? I'm a fairly consistent religious person, so am I wrong to think that something is wrong with me? (Basically reiterate Ryan in my first paragraph) The only requirement for Asexuality is not desiring sexual activity with anyone (mentally or IRL). Your preferences in clothing has nothing to do with that, but you may be choosing those preferences because you don't want to falsely advertise sexual availability. Not wanting a relationship is a separate matter; romantic and sexual orientation are two different things. If you don't get crushes nor desire a relationship that's called aromantic. Shorthand for being both is Aro Ace. Religion has nothing to do with orientation, so yes, an Aro or Ace person can be religious. Aro/Ace can be a symptom of several mental conditions (e.g. high functioning autism, schizoid personality disorder) so it is possible something's off about you, but being that way (having a condition/not/being Aro or Ace) doesn't make you wrong. But there are things that can surpress sexuality too; such as your imposed view of it by your religion, medication, fetish shame, negative self-perspective, anxiety disorder, never having masturbated, or never having foreplay/made out (perhaps specifically with someone you trust and/or have a crush on). 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pramana Posted August 26, 2017 Share Posted August 26, 2017 Asexuality is usually defined as a lack of sexual attraction, so something to consider is whether you have sexual thoughts or fantasies directed towards specific people or people of specific genders. If so, that would be an indication that you're experiencing sexual attraction. From you story, there are strong indications that you are experiencing sex-repulsion, which is the active dislike of participating in sexual activities. While it is relatively common for asexuals to dislike nudity and thoughts about sex, it should be kept in mind that not all asexuals are sex-repulsed, and not all sex-repulsed people are asexual. I hope this information is useful, and I wish you the best of luck! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gisiebob Posted August 27, 2017 Share Posted August 27, 2017 whether or not you are asexual is wholly detatched from whether or not you are abnormal. consider, what is normal for the average cubic meter of mater on this little planet? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jackninja5 Posted August 27, 2017 Share Posted August 27, 2017 Does asexual make you abnormal? No, of course not. I consider myself abnormal but not because I'm asexual but for a wide variety of other reasons. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
dragon_nerd Posted August 27, 2017 Share Posted August 27, 2017 Normal is relative, and being asexual is perfectly normal, particularly here. I'm not overly religious myself but there is a sizeable religious community here, try looking at the intersectionality (I don't think I spelt that right) and questions about asexuality threads And welcome to AVEN, here is some cake 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted August 28, 2017 Share Posted August 28, 2017 On 8/27/2017 at 5:32 AM, Jackninja5 said: Does asexual make you abnormal? No, of course not. I consider myself abnormal but not because I'm asexual but for a wide variety of other reasons. By definition of abnormal it literally does. Being gay/bi/ace/aro/Gray/cross-oriented is abnormal because it is a vast minority thus not average at all. @gisiebob *derps eyes thinking* Well, yes, in a way, but in a way no. Yes asexuals are abnormal (as mentioned above) but simply being abnormal isn't what Ace is. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted August 28, 2017 Share Posted August 28, 2017 I wouldn't say "abnormal" perhaps "rare but interesting" 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted August 28, 2017 Share Posted August 28, 2017 But do these abnormal people have communities; where you can be normal? Yes. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The_Reluctant_Dragon Posted September 9, 2017 Share Posted September 9, 2017 On 8/28/2017 at 6:45 AM, float on said: I wouldn't say "abnormal" perhaps "rare but interesting" Yeah, I don't think there is anything wrong with us or the minority, we are just our own thing. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Stheg Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 Yes, you can be asexual and from a religious background. I'm both. Clothing is a personal preference, but I don't like short shirts or super tight pants either. Not wanting a relationship could mean you are aromantic or it may mean you just don't want one now. I was very adamant at a younger age that I didn't want a relationship, but I'm not aromantic. Normal is relative. Don't worry too much about trying to be normal. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lichley Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 Yay, welcome sounds like your sex adverse, which means the idea of sex repulses you. You could definitely be asexual from what you described, but the only person who can label you that is yourself. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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