Kirbyfan66 Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 I like to think of myself as educated on asexuality, but having only known about it for about a year, there are some things that time hasn't given me the answer to. Namely, it's when someone close says something... awkward, I guess is the right word, and it catches me off guard. A fellow associate recently called me a "late bloomer" when I tried explaining that I wasn't sexually interested in anything. And yeah, that's a very common response, and I've gotten it before. But it's still awkward to deal with. Do statements like these and "oh, like the plant?" ever stop being awkward? Or, at least, what would be a good response to things like that? I've been keeping a rather professional tone on these, but as a very silly and witty person, I actually can't think of any responses - their denial of asexuality stops me dead in my tracks. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Vega91 Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 They're pretty much always awkward, or annoying though I'm sure you start coming up with responses if you come out to more people. I can't really think of a response (maybe because it's 3 am) other than just explaining that asexuality is an orientation and thus not just being "slow to develop." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Purnkin Spurce Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 I used to feel really awkward if people asked if I masturbated. I still do, not as much though. Now I'm open with sharing that I'm autochorissexual, that I also have a libido. Even if they find that confusing, I feel like I'm sharing some scientific fact about myself so it makes it less awkward lol I think eventually they do become less awkward. I think over the years as you're becoming more comfortable with your orientation, that they slowly turn from awkward, to annoying, to ok. Mostly when people ask me those questions I just get irritated now of days. Depends on the person. lol Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Scottthespy Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 They eventually stopped being awkward to me...now I look forward to my own easy going demeanor making the asker feel awkward. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Calamity Jim Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 I like humour. "You're a late bloomer!" "Rocks don't bloom." <-- the more serious the face the better. It is a good sidestep and it tends to diffuse emotions, but it isn't for everyone. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Prairie Posted March 17, 2015 Share Posted March 17, 2015 I like to work to perceive such questions/comments as an indication of discomfort on the other person's part, a sign that their way of viewing the world is insufficient for including me. It's easier to respond in a helping way, to help them with their difficulty. Some responses that come to mind: "Oh, like the plant?" - "No. It's true that asexual in biology refers to a method of reproduction not involving combination of DNA, but that's not the meaning I'm using when I say I'm asexual." "You're a late bloomer!" - "Flowers are sexual, and I said I'm asexual, so I'm actually not late blooming. In fact, I've been asexual since I was born, so I 'bloomed' already." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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