AWF Posted June 15, 2014 Share Posted June 15, 2014 Someones gonna have to explain this too me pose, cos I just dont get it. what's the attraction for the idea of wearing black rings as a symbol of asexuality? I mean for me it just seems like we're trying to further associate ourselves with celibates. Aren't the major rings as symbols wedding rings-where ur promising to stay with someone for life engagement rings-where ur promising to marry someone and promise rings- where ur promising not to have sex until marriage. I mean rings seem to majorly symbolise a decision you've made and act as a reminder and outward symbol of it that can be recognised by all. It just feels so much like we're getting in on promise ring territory when it feels like we should be running in the total other direction to avoid the confusion. I mean do other orientations have rings that I dont know about? Well, as noparlpf just pointed-out, there are associations between the fingers a person wears their rings on and their relationship status. There's one for almost every finger, I believe. But with how many different and mutually exclusive meanings each finger has gained over time, it can be extremely difficult to interpret correctly. But, if I may put it like this: rings are jewellery and jewellery are adornments, and adornments are inharently sexual. It has to do with attraction, from the shape of antlers to a sturdily built nest to even our own clothing, in part. It's natural, we've only borrowed it. Although, returning to rings specifically, I don't think their generally intended to attract, but are merely comentaries. But yes, right now "black ring, right hand, middle finger" is a symbol unbeknownst to most people, allo and ace alike (I would argue). Also, you've heard of men having a piercing in only the right ear being as a symbol of homosexuality? That's one example of rings representing one's orientation, if your definitions are flexible. Aces do the same thing, if they put stock in the idea, anyways. It's simply a symbol for anyone that understands, but I think it goes deeper than that and means something personal to the wearer. But that wouldn't make for a punctual post (it's already WAY to long!). And also if we're the only ones who will notice then are we like trying to pretend to be spies in some sort of secret organisation? Is it like a secret handshake or something? Yes, exactly like this. Your security clearance has just been promoted. Thoughts? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Harry Osborn Posted June 15, 2014 Share Posted June 15, 2014 I don't wear a ring. I had no idea it was even a thing tbh, but it is a good idea, kinda like the rainbow jewelry for gay/lesbian people. IDK if I would wear one, since I already wear two rings (on each ring finger) and I tend to find wearing any on the other fingers a bit uncomfortable. Still, if I were to do that, I'd think onyx would be cool. I've never seen anybody else wear one, though, but IDK of any other aces in my area, either. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Phrenicos Posted June 15, 2014 Share Posted June 15, 2014 Also note that the left middle finger means "permanently single" whereas the right middle finger only means "currently/temporarily single." Huh, I didn't know that. I'm aromantic too, so that works even better wearing the ring on my left hand, then. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
radicalonion Posted June 15, 2014 Share Posted June 15, 2014 While I'm still waiting on my ring order, I have a mood ring that has blackened over the years as my temporary ring hahaha. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Heart Posted June 16, 2014 Share Posted June 16, 2014 Also note that the left middle finger means "permanently single" whereas the right middle finger only means "currently/temporarily single." You learn something new every day! Part of me wants to know what polyamorists do, if they're neither single nor not looking for someone ;) Adornments, like flowers, have come to have such subtle and specific meanings for every little thing... I will never figure it all out I think! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Amatista Posted July 2, 2014 Author Share Posted July 2, 2014 Someones gonna have to explain this too me pose, cos I just dont get it. what's the attraction for the idea of wearing black rings as a symbol of asexuality? I mean for me it just seems like we're trying to further associate ourselves with celibates. Aren't the major rings as symbols wedding rings-where ur promising to stay with someone for life engagement rings-where ur promising to marry someone and promise rings- where ur promising not to have sex until marriage. I mean rings seem to majorly symbolise a decision you've made and act as a reminder and outward symbol of it that can be recognised by all. It just feels so much like we're getting in on promise ring territory when it feels like we should be running in the total other direction to avoid the confusion. I mean do other orientations have rings that I dont know about? And also if we're the only ones who will notice then are we like trying to pretend to be spies in some sort of secret organisation? Is it like a secret handshake or something? Idk this is coming out a bit too rantish so plz dont take offence, I guess he black ring thing is just getting to be a pet peeve of mine. Explaination welcome It's a symbol of asexual pride and it's a way for asexuals to recognize each other. If you wear a black ring, an asexual might come up to you and ask about it. It's discreet enough that most people don't know it represents asexuality, so you don't have to come out to certain people if you don't wants to. It's kind of like, hey, this is what I identify as and I feel no shame about it. It's a way for the wearer to feel self-satisfaction. There is no confusion, because most people assume you're just wearing it for style. It doesn't mean that you're asexual forever or celibate. Sexuality is fluid, and celibacy is a choice. Unlike promise rings, there's no official strings attached. You can always take it off. This ring doesn't symbolize a decision per se, because asexuality isn't a choice, but you do decide to buy the ring. I don't think other orientations have rings. It's not pretending, really. It's just that we are a small community and no one "looks" asexual. There are no real identifiers. It's one of the only visible hints we have. If someone wears it and an ace just happens to walk by and see it, they have a reason to start talking to the stranger and they can get to know each other and support each other's asexuality. And none taken. :) It's not everyone's thing. You don't have to wear one if you don't want to or you don't like the idea of it. Not every ace wears one. It's a personal thing. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Artistofnoname Posted July 2, 2014 Share Posted July 2, 2014 Also note that the left middle finger means "permanently single" whereas the right middle finger only means "currently/temporarily single." You learn something new every day! Part of me wants to know what polyamorists do, if they're neither single nor not looking for someone ;) Adornments, like flowers, have come to have such subtle and specific meanings for every little thing... I will never figure it all out I think! Good to know since I am aromantic Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ryu-no-joou Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 Mine is beautiful tungsten carbide and I love it. I wear it on my right middle finger, which I guess makes sense because I'd like to have a husband someday. ^_^ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 I did have a nice looking black ring made out of hematite, it has been gone for like a year now... should buy a new one Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Xavy Posted July 4, 2014 Share Posted July 4, 2014 I need to start looking around for people wearing black rings on their right middle fingers ...... Not that I would know what to do if I came across such a person. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sebastian Grace Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 Can anyone recommend anywhere to get a black ring like this one? I currently have a thicker one of similar appearance, but am having trouble finding them in Canada/on sites that ship to Canada. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
(A)rrogant Avian Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 I wear a black ring, always on my middle finger, right hand. I don't wear it to attract asexuals, or to show myself off as ace, but I wear it for myself, it makes me more confident about who I am. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
JMSuttonPhotoowl Posted October 9, 2014 Share Posted October 9, 2014 I have a hematite ring and I where it on the right middle finger. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TheLastOfSheila Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 I want very much to wear the black ring, and hope to be ordering one soon. My problem is that I have very sensitive skin. Normally, I can only wear pure gold or pure silver. Any metal alloys usually cause my skin to break out in a weeping rash. Does anyone have a similar allergy, and if so, have you tried wearing tungsten? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
canguy Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 I used to wear one but then I stopped because it didn't really fit (it never did and I don't know why I bought it when I knew it didn't fit). It was a beautiful Onyx with a white stipe in it, I got it from GreenEarth. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Cheery Posted October 11, 2014 Share Posted October 11, 2014 I got a really cheep one and it stains my finger black. So I'd really recommend not doing that. I bought a new one on the internet and that one's a black tungsten ring with pretty good reviews. Waiting anxiously for it to arrive. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ficulnean Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 I know people have asked about this being a thing already, but how was this finger and colour picked out specifically? (Also, I won't be wearing on, I don't like rings. I've ordered in a nice scarf already though. This is the quickest I've ever jumped on a bandwagon.) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Teavana Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Currently, I don't wear one. I want a black ring made out of black diamonds. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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