QueenOfTheRats Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 Share what it was like to loose your virginity(or just what sex is like for you in general) So, I was a freshman at college and going though a really bad depression. I was really really shy at the time, and I had no idea how to make friends. I met this cute raver boy who seemed to come out of nowhere. Never dated him, but I remember he had a really lovely smile. He was actually a really lovely person, inside and out. He was super spontaneous, and at that point he seemed really happy and optimistic. He tried so hard to pull me out of my depression, taking me to raves and such. We drank rum out on the beach and went for walks in the woods. It was fun, and looking back he was probably my only true friend that year. I was high and drunk when we had sex, and I bled a little. I kept expecting something was going to happen to make it feel good, but it didn't. It wasn't that fun, and I don't think either of us climaxed. By sociey's standards both of us were "hot", and we liked each other. It was such a huge let down that there was no chemistry, and I could see things were not going to work out. Not with him. Not with anyone. We hung out a few times after that, but it was awkward, then I got lost in finals and we lost touch. Every once in a while I would lurk his facebook page to see what he was up to. I wasn't in love or anything, but I did care about him. There were lots of photos of him traveling and looking happy. Fast forward about 10 years later and his brother texts out of the blue telling me that he had committed suicide. He had plummeted from the top of a skyscraper in the middle of the night. Apparently he had depression, and had always suffered from depression. It disturbed me a lot, especially since he had tried to hard to pull me out of my depression years ago. Later on I had more sex, and it was equally pleasure less and even less memorable. I'm happy I lost my virginity to someone I actually liked, even though it was never destined to be. Link to post Share on other sites
Snao Cone Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 Damn, that's sad to hear about his death. As for the sex, there are some similarities with mine. I was drunk, it was at a college party, I chose someone I barely knew and didn't care to get to know because I wanted it to be easy to avoid him afterwards. It wasn't a special experience I wanted to share, just something I wanted to get over with, because I thought my virginity/lack of sexual experience didn't reflect my l*beral attitude towards the subject. He was clueless. It wasn't enjoyable. By society's standards neither of us was "hot" (at the time). I can't even remember his name, let alone find out where he's at these days. I doubt I'm even remembering his face correctly, as it seems to have been overtaken by somebody else I know with whom I have not had sex. Sex I've had since then has been also unimpressive, though some instances more memorable than the first one. Link to post Share on other sites
lazypanda Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 1 hour ago, QueenOfTheRats said: It disturbed me a lot, especially since he had tried to hard to pull me out of my depression years ago. Link to post Share on other sites
QueenOfTheRats Posted January 21, 2018 Author Share Posted January 21, 2018 12 minutes ago, lazypanda said: I thought about Robin Williams when I heard about his death. Why is it hallways way more disturbing when the happiest people in your life turn out to be secretly the most depressed? Link to post Share on other sites
Mirae Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 54 minutes ago, QueenOfTheRats said: I thought about Robin Williams when I heard about his death. Why is it hallways way more disturbing when the happiest people in your life turn out to be secretly the most depressed? Haha, the perfect summary of my life the happiest/saddest girl in the world Link to post Share on other sites
Anessa Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 I cried for days when Robin Williams died, I adored him, he had such beautiful mind <3 As for sex, my first time was when I was 21 y.o. It was with the guy i've met 2 times in a span of 2 years. He wanted to be with me and I wanted to get this over with. It wasn't good and it didn't hurt. I had sex with him one more time and it was even worse and that was it. That was 4 y. ago. We saw each other few months ago and it was really awkward. Nex time I had sex, it was few months after with different guy and it wasn't enjoyable eather. There wasn't any chemistry or attraction. Little did I know that few years after that I would figure out why there were nothing between us. I am asexual I didn't have sex after that, I didn't felt the need nor did I wish to feel how I felt before; discusting, sad and humiliated. I was really confused why sex wasn't good, everybody else enyojed it. I thought there was something wrong with me. Thoes guys wanted to meet with me again, so it waas probably "ok" for them and that was even more confusing. If they enjoyed it, why didn't I? I didn't know about asexuality at that time, I just thought there was something wrong with my brain not to feel what thers feel. I took me a long time after having sex to feel like myself again. I'm still not sure if I am maybe demisexual. I'm pretty sure I don't want to have sex like that anymore, but I think that maybe it would be better with someone who I like. Link to post Share on other sites
Skully Roses Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 My first time was odd. I had just gotten out of an abusive relationship and had started dating a guy minutes after me and the abusive one broke up. Little did I know this guy was super sex-obsessed and weird and it wasn't a good time. But we started dating and all was relatively well and I set my boundaries for I don't want to have sex for at least a month and all that and then three days into the relationship he came over to my house and pressured me into sex. And it was weird and painful (TMI warning: Little did I know that would never go away, I am what men would consider "overly tight") and I didn't like it and we were fully clothed and it was the opposite of what I wanted. Link to post Share on other sites
Philip027 Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 On 1/20/2018 at 9:27 PM, lazypanda said: Damn, that hits ya right in the gut. Link to post Share on other sites
_____-________-_ Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 My first time was actually in 2016 with a girl I had a crush on then started dating for.. not even a week... Yeah it was awkward and we would go on to have ALOT of sex... it was tiring and frustrating at times. prefers satisfying myself. she was the only one out of all of my partners I decided to say okay to in terms of sex.. but meh... it felt rushed and to me... as if sex was her only drive. now if oral doesn't count then its 2016 Link to post Share on other sites
_____-________-_ Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 Yeah I know I lost my virginity not even a year after joining aven... some ace lol. wish I could have kept my virginity now... Link to post Share on other sites
Nidwin Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 In my early twenties I tried twice with a professional. Was that a waste of money and time. One evening, my only ex as an adult, came out of the bathroom and told me "I presume I'm going have to make the first step as I'm tired of waiting". I was "Oops, forgot that part of having a girlfriend" and we gave it a go. It was a weird but interresting experience and we tried it one more time a couple of weeks later before she broke up with me. Felt nothing special, except sure muscles afterwards, and thought that there was clearly something very very wrong or broken with me. Link to post Share on other sites
Philip027 Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 Quote One evening, my only ex as an adult, came out of the bathroom and told me "I presume I'm going have to make the first step as I'm tired of waiting". Boy, if that doesn't get you all hot and heavy and in the mood, I can't imagine what would. Link to post Share on other sites
Nidwin Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 10 minutes ago, Philip027 said: Boy, if that doesn't get you all hot and heavy and in the mood, I can't imagine what would. Shall I add that she removed her T-shirt while saying it (no bra) and came immediately sitting in my lap on the couch, face to face. As for getting in the mood. "oops, forgot about that part ..." Link to post Share on other sites
FinneganCatch Posted January 24, 2018 Share Posted January 24, 2018 My first time having sex was with a roommate which was a mistake, but hey that is what college is for right? I've had sex with a number of people since, usually its where my relationships fail because I'm willing to a certain point but disinterested. I am married atm though separated and I will say despite my best efforts sex has been one of the reasons for our separation. Link to post Share on other sites
GLRDT Posted January 24, 2018 Share Posted January 24, 2018 I was 21 and with my amazing boyfriend at the time. I had been dating him for a little over a year and I knew I thought he was cute and I loved his personality, perhaps in love with him and I trusted him. I was more curious than anything else. No desire whatsoever, but my mom and sister had sex when they were 21 and so I was like that's good enough for me! I have to try it eventually. At the time, I was also very confused about what sexual attraction felt like and thought I'd know if we had sex. It took like five tries at different times before he could actually get in. I had vaginismus and I wasn't turned on and he wasn't super experienced so it was uncomfortable and painful and I was way thinking in my head the whole time. Unfortunately, I thought that if I didn't want to have sex with him that meant that I guess I didn't really love him and I broke up with him which was pretty sad. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.