Wondering about old crushes/squishes

[RoseGoesToYale]

For crushes/squishes that never got resolved, i.e. never confessed, got together, or got a solid rejection, do you ever find yourself wondering about the person later? Even if you haven't seen or talked to them in years?

 

I've been wondering a lot about an old crush. I never said anything then since there was a bit of an age gap, and I thought it would end in school upheaval. Now I just kind of wonder how he's doing in life. Maybe I feel like I want some kind of closure, I dunno.

[TheAP]

I had an obsession with a classmate about 5-6 years ago. It wasn't romantic in that I didn't want a relationship with her, but it was intense. I still find myself thinking about her sometimes, and recently I had a dream about her.

[Grumpy Alien]

Honestly, no. I don't really think about them.

[Philip027]

I never seem to lose my crushes.  Despite being in a committed relationship now, I still look back upon my first crush/relationship just as fondly as I did 14 years ago when it was happening.

 

It's for this reason that I feel I can technically be considered polyamorous, despite being monogamous in practice.

[A shard of glass]

I don't really think about past squishes or crushes a huge amount. It's because I've screwed up every time. No point reflecting IMO. No point bringing back bad memories

[lilgroundhog]

Occasionally I'll wonder how someone is doing or what they're up to, but will then move on.  Mine were normally so crazy as to be implausible or something within our friendship made me realize they weren't who I thought they were.

[Euna]

Yes, I can definitely relate to this.  I don't dwell on it too much, but sometimes I get to thinking about it and, like you, just wanting closure or maybe hoping to meet them again.  I guess since there was no relationship, there was no "end."  It's a weird feeling.

[SilentRose]

... embarrassingly enough, I still have one crush from high school that I still hold onto (I haven't even seen this person in three years by the way!) 

...I still watch his YouTube videos (yes he has a channel, pretty sure I'm the only one that watches!) And check out his Facebook and Twitter regularly, and I still have weird dreams all the time where he's a famous singer and actor. So yeah, I soooo relate to what you said! 

 

I definitely wonder what happened to him too. He never found out I had a crush on him... sometimes I wonder...but I was way too shy. 

I often wonder exactly what happened to him....I hope I don't sound like too much of a stalker! Crushes are the worst sometimes...

[Chihiro]

I remember my past crushes and wonder about them. Especially when I feel lonely. However, I have zero feelings for them now and that bothers me. Because at the time, I thought I would never get over them. It's like I betrayed my old feelings by getting over them O_o Odd! I guess, I just miss crushing on them.

[Brownace]

A thousand yes's.

 

I met him in High School in grade 11. It's been 5 years since we graduated, and I still feel so much for him. I actually had a dream about him yesterday, so today I texted him and we had a nice conversation. But I have never declared my feelings; I think I will try to do it today. I just feel too much for him, and, actually, lately I have been wondering if this is not only a crush and is instead what love is. Regardless of what it is, I think it will never materialize because he is not gay, but I still need to say something. Maybe I am looking for closure... 

*sighs*

[Lanti SF]

Yep. 

 

Had a crush on one guy in high school, and he played a big role in making me who I am today. We lost contact after a year in uni, and I sometimes wonder how he's doing. I have his number, but I've never been bothered to actually call.

[Squirrel Combat]

I've had a number that never got resolved, and while I do think about them sometimes, I remember the reasons why they happened at all and am relieved that they never got very far.

[Lemonsky]

I wonder about my previous crushes and squishes a lot, sometimes even to the point of being sad that I never had a chance with them. At the same time I'm kind of relieved that things never went any further with any of them as the idea of a relationship still feels quite alien to me. Now I'm just left wondering if I'd just like to be close friends with people without romantic undertones.

[finicky feminist]

I think its pretty normal. I think about my old crushes frequently lol. Mind you all of these were crushes I was proud of like they were cool attractive people.  It's just that I grew out of them. And why I wonder about them is because I think of what would have happened if I had summoned the courage to ask them out. As soon as I have a new crush I forget about the old ones. But when I am crushless I reflect on my old crushes lol. 

[FinallyReadyToBeHere]

Every now and then, yeah. It depends on who it was and in what context.

 

For example, if I had a crush on a celebrity, I may check up and see what they're up to because, of course, they are public figures in that regard. It's easy to catch up on what they're doing because internet. 

 

If I had a crush on someone I actually knew, it's a bit more difficult. One trend I have with a lot of my crushes who I know personally is that they tend to be older than me. By a lot. Say, twenty years. Yes, it's weird, I know.

 

One of them was an eighth grade teacher I'd had. He was an attractive, nice, very Christian man who taught English and he was one of my favorite teachers. I still remember getting an awesome grade on a paper I had done about epilepsy for his course and, for a certain figure of speech or something like that, he literally attached a dime to the page with a comment on how awesome it was. Still one of my proudest moments. Wouldn't hesitate to say that he is perhaps the reason I have done so well when it comes to writing academic papers.

He literally disappeared two years after I moved on to high school. Even the times where I've thought about him and tried to look him up to say "hey", I never actually find him. It's never too deep, though. The thought passes after about an hour just lazily browsing Google seeing if I can find him. Unless I ask some of my former teachers who actually knew him, I don't think I ever will.