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~Rikki~

Sexual vs Allosexual

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~Rikki~

I've noticed a lot of people use the term sexual when what they really mean is allosexual. It's something that grinds my gears as an ace that's sexual. I partake in sexual activity, but I'm not allosexual. Just a frustration I have with the fact that people see them as synonyms. /rant

Any other sexual aces feel the same?

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Lady Girl

I'm not ace and I would prefer to be called sexual over allosexual. Sexual isn't indicative of my behavior, it's a short version of heterosexual. Sexual people also experience sexual attraction (they aren't just/always sexually active)...it's an orientation based word for me and possibly many sexual people. I'm the opposite of you and don't have sex at this time, but still consider myself sexual.

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sync

I really dislike the word allosexual, to be honest. It seems like a really superfluous, redundant term for "not asexual." It also kind of sounds like it describes people who are attracted to dinosaurs. I'm not into it.

I don't really think describing someone's orientation as "sexual" really implies that asexuals can't participate in sexual activity, but that's just my one perspective.

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Zerο

Allosexual makes me think of dinosaurs. I'd like to think hetero/homo/bi-sexuals don't care enough for the distinction just as I don't for aromantic/asexual.

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Trava u doma

Um, no. First off, "sexual asexual" does not make a helluva lot of sense, does it?

Besides, have you every heard someone identify as "I am a masturbating homoesexual"? No? You know why? Because that's just TMI and a completely useless knowledge for anyone but the person themselves.

That's the first I hear of "allosexual" and I'm not convinced it is a step forward. Making up unnecessarily confusing terminology does not help asexuality to be taken more seriously.

So, imho, asexual - sexual spectrum makes perfect sense to me.

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ThaHoward

So by your logic asexuals are not participating in sexual activities? Since if "sexual "is the definition if you're actively sexual or not, asexual most mean "not sexual active". I use asexual to describe my orientation, and sexual for those at the other end of the sexual spectrum; those who experience sexual attraction.

Different words have meaning :) And depending on the contex, I believe most will see that one are talking about "allo"sexual and not sexual activity.

Contrary it is actually more confusing if you're saying sexual as a subsitute for sexual activities, since no one use that word to describe how sexual active they are. "Sexual aces" is just confusing, "sexual active aces" would be more logical, or at least more communicative. It is a reason why the "a" is in front of "sexual", and that our orientation is not "a-allosexual".

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5_♦♣

I'm not fond of any weird prefix attached to sexual. (Allo, zed, whatever). Besides, by attaching a prefix onto it, you're still saying sexual. Also, I use Asexual to describe my orientation, not my behavior.

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Wineblood

I think allosexual is a stupid term, much like non-asexual.

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marmalade-cats

I think that sexual and allosexual are pretty much the same things. Both are not asexual, and that's really as specific as it needs to get. Enjoying sexual activity as an asexual doesn't make you a sexual asexual, it just means that you enjoy sexual activity as an asexual.

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Manly Ace

So by your logic asexuals are not participating in sexual activities? Since if "sexual "is the definition if you're actively sexual or not, asexual most mean "not sexual active". I use asexual to describe my orientation, and sexual for those at the other end of the sexual spectrum; those who experience sexual attraction.

Exactly.

In my opinion, the misunderstandings about asexuality are directly related to the word itself. "Asexuality" actually sounds like "without sexuality" or "opposite of sexual" at least. So, many things could fit into that word, and not only the opposite of bisexuality.

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~Rikki~

1. I didn't come up with the term allosexual.

2. When I read or hear "sexual", I don't think of sexual orientation (heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual/demisexual/gray asexual etc etc etc). I think of sexual activity . Which makes more sense. People don't say "I did heterosexual activity today". They either say sex or sexual activity.

3. If using sexual the way I use it, sexual asexual does make sense.

4. No need for some of you to talk down to me and be borderline rude. It's really not needed.

5. There are asexuals and aromantics that partake in sexual activity. No where did I state aces don't partake in sexual activity.

6. This is something that bothers me personally and all I was wondering was if there were anyone else that felt the same. Not to have people write things that, to me, feel borderline rude.

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pegasusoftraken

Outside of aven I haven't heard many people use "sexual" as a sexual orientation, and the word does seem to be used much more often to refer to sexual activity.

And I think it makes sense to use a word that doesn't already have other meanings to describe "not asexual". So I don't see anything wrong with allosexual.

It just seems weird since until recently there hasn't been a word to cover the sexual/allosexual orientations - a word for it hasn't been needed before asexuality started being treated as an orientation.

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ThaHoward

1. I didn't come up with the term allosexual.

2. When I read or hear "sexual", I don't think of sexual orientation (heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual/demisexual/gray asexual etc etc etc). I think of sexual activity . Which makes more sense. People don't say "I did heterosexual activity today". They either say sex or sexual activity.

3. If using sexual the way I use it, sexual asexual does make sense.

4. No need for some of you to talk down to me and be borderline rude. It's really not needed.

5. There are asexuals and aromantics that partake in sexual activity. No where did I state aces don't partake in sexual activity.

6. This is something that bothers me personally and all I was wondering was if there were anyone else that felt the same. Not to have people write things that, to me, feel borderline rude.

2: Yes they participat in sexual activity or have sex. Your example are irrelevant.

3: Maybe, but sexual asexual is contradictionary. Asexual means non-sexual. So you're basically saying "sexual not-sexual". Contex matters, if we're speaking about asexuals and those who feel sexual attraction, one can easiely assume that sexual reffer to those who experience sexual attraction.

4: Where?

5: Yes it is, but still "sexual" implies that you experience sexual attraction, since when we reffer to asexuality we reffer to no asexual attraction and not i.e no genital or no sex life.

6: Again where? Even if it means much to you personally you need to be prepared to defend your views and reasons and be prepared to face critizism.

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~Rikki~

Okay so since some people define asexuality as "no sexual activity/doesn't have sex/doesn't desire sex", I need to make it clear that I use the definition that its a sexual orientation.

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Scottthespy

I was under the notion that 'asexual' was drawing off the Latin use of 'a', meaning something along the lines of 'without'. So, A-sexual, without sexual. If the word sexual is not a orientation, then putting a prefix on it cannot make it an orientation. Putting a prefix on a verb does not make it a noun. If Sexual is not an orientation, nor is Asexual. I think whats confusing about 'sexual asexual' is the same thing that's confusing to people who have never heard of asexuality when they ask 'so you you're a plant?'. They are using the term "asexual" in place of "asexual reproduction". Both words are necessary for the term to mean the thing they're thinking of. One can say that plants are "asexual", yes, but the activity they are partaking in is asexual reproduction. Asexual means without sex, reproduction means on a basic word level 'producing again', in this case as in 'producing another of the species'. One could say that rocks, carpets, and computers are asexual. One could say that certain parts of science and philosophy are asexual. Ones thoughts could be asexual. We are co-opting the term, with a loose interpretation to make 'without sex' mean 'without sexual attractions', so technically we are also guilty of using a word alone that should be part of a term. Still, it is always up to a person to decide which words they choose to define which concepts. I know a person who persistently uses the term "red flowers" to mean "over powered" or "god modding" in mmo's. No one understands him, and this frustrates him. If a person insists on using words that are generally accepted to mean something else, whether or not that generality is technically accurate, that person is going to be faced with confusion in communication. If you want to be understood without needing to explain yourself, use the words the majority knows. If you want to assign your own definitions that do not jive with how most use them, you'll have to put up with confusion and irritation.

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~Rikki~

As already stated people outside of AVEN don't use sexual as an orientation.

AVEN states that asexuality has to do with sexual attraction and many people, before I came out, "yelled" at me for not referring to asexuality as a sexual orientation.

Maybe if everyone could actually agree on what asexuality means, we'd never run into any problems ^-^

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Scottthespy

You yourself are using asexual in these posts as an orientation. If you're willing to change half the term because people 'yelled at you', why not all of it? Right now you've got a situation where you're using a definition from one set of rules for one word and a definition from an opposing set of rules for the other word. It comes across as incongruous because the rules don't match up. Try playing chess on a settlers of Catan board and see how well it works, for a more physical example. Its an unfortunate fact that every one does have different definitions for the words they hear. Some differences are very subtle. Some are very overt. Some are deeply personal, but that's not going to change the fact that trying to use words for a personal definition that has little to do with the 'general accepted' one is always going to cause a communications break down. Your options are sadly limited to "use whatever words you want and continue to have people question/malign you", or "prescribe to the usual way of doing things for the sake of some peace and quiet".

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warrigan

the problem is limited terminology; right now, some are using "sexual" as the opposite of asexual, while some are using it as the opposite of celibate. i totally get the op's point, but i'd really prefer to have sexual/asexual as antonyms (because the prefixes make it so convenient! :) ) and come up with/use a different word as an antonym to celibate; we could either use a completely different term, like "sexually active" or some other word, or we could try to keep it neat with prefixes and use a term like "noncelibate" or something. :)

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Geo

I am sexual. Allosexual is a ridiculous word.

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BlackRose

There are several different meanings to the word "sexual":

1. (adjective) relating to sex

2. (noun) person who experiences sexual attraction.

So a sexual person (sense 1) is just someone who puts importance on sex, values sex, thinks about it a lot. In that sense, there are many sexual asexuals.

It's not that they're synonyms; it's that one word has two meanings. It really isn't that confusing because you can always tell from context.

I'm not fond of any weird prefix attached to sexual. (Allo, zed, whatever). Besides, by attaching a prefix onto it, you're still saying sexual. Also, I use Asexual to describe my orientation, not my behavior.

What's a zedsexual? I've never heard that one. A British or Canadian person attracted to the last letter of the alphabet?

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Serran

Many sexuals dislike the term allosexual. It would be rude to label them with something they don't like. Sexual is short for heterosexual, homosexual, pansexual etc. Sexually active asexual describes what I am. If I told anyone I know that I am a "sexual asexual" they would be like "what?" - either within AVEN or outside of AVEN. Also, I believe I have seen interviews of people who work on studies use "sexual people" when discussing asexuality and those were professionals not associated with AVEN. *shrug* I mean if someone prefers being called an allosexual I would, but it does kind of sound like a dinosaur. :lol:

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Philip027

The term allosexual invariably makes me think of someone that's into the allosaurus. Ergo, I don't use the term :<

It's worth pointing out that just as there can be confusion between "sexual" used to refer to orientation and "sexual" used to refer to activity, there is confusion for asexuals too... like how it can be used to refer to orientation, or to refer to the reproduction style. Plenty of English words have multiple meanings; until our future generations evolve the language a little bit more that's just something we get to put up with @_@

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ThaHoward

Okay so since some people define asexuality as "no sexual activity/doesn't have sex/doesn't desire sex", I need to make it clear that I use the definition that its a sexual orientation.

Yes, and therefore it is natural to assume that sexual means that one have sexual attraction. Unless anything else is specified, sexual will mean for most on AVEN "someone who experience sexual attraction". But of course you can say sexual other places and not get mistaken, but here on aven most would assume you're speaking of sexual attraction unless it is specified to be something else. And "sexual" is not a sexual orientation, it is rather a super group of many sexual orientations.

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5_♦♣

I'm not fond of any weird prefix attached to sexual. (Allo, zed, whatever). Besides, by attaching a prefix onto it, you're still saying sexual. Also, I use Asexual to describe my orientation, not my behavior.

What's a zedsexual? I've never heard that one. A British or Canadian person attracted to the last letter of the alphabet?

Back at the end of 2011/beginning of 2012, there was discussion here and elsewhere (tumblr, LJ) regarding alternatives to 'sexual', and that was one of the alternatives that someone came up with.

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BlackRose

I'm not fond of any weird prefix attached to sexual. (Allo, zed, whatever). Besides, by attaching a prefix onto it, you're still saying sexual. Also, I use Asexual to describe my orientation, not my behavior.

What's a zedsexual? I've never heard that one. A British or Canadian person attracted to the last letter of the alphabet?

Back at the end of 2011/beginning of 2012, there was discussion here and elsewhere (tumblr, LJ) regarding alternatives to 'sexual', and that was one of the alternatives that someone came up with.

Oh I get it.. like a and zee are opposites! We'd have to say zeesexual for us Americans though.

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Guest

Oh I get it.. like a and zee are opposites! We'd have to say zeesexual for us Americans though.

To someone living near Holland, like me, that just sounds like you get off to oceans... :lol:

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5_♦♣

Oceans? I don't follow.

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mikbuster

sea, I'm guessing

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Serran

Oceans? I don't follow.

Zee in Dutch means sea

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BlackRose

There is a song about the Zuyder Zee.

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