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Tiny mentions that don't deserve their own thread


Robin L

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Sometimes, when roaming around the internet, you stumble across an article that mentions asexuality, but it's not notable for it to deserve it's own thread. That's what this thread is for.

As a start:

Asexuals and Sexual Anorexics on a blog. (Note: content isn't all correct)

Note: Feel free to place any of the articles into it's own thread

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So I wasn't sure where to put this and then I thought, hey! that's what this thread is for!

Post dedicated to Asexual Awareness Week on one of my favorite blogs, STFU-Moffat: http://stfu-moffat.tumblr.com/post/63830029328/there-seems-to-be-a-fair-amount-of-interest-in-fanworks

:D Yay awareness!

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Eh. Creating a thread like this almost gets rid of all threads in this forum.

Usually people only have about one link to an article or site to share and removes the discussion.

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Eh. Creating a thread like this almost gets rid of all threads in this forum.

Usually people only have about one link to an article or site to share and removes the discussion.

But consider maybe an entire article about the queer community, and only mentioned the word "asexuality" one time.
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Eh. Creating a thread like this almost gets rid of all threads in this forum.

Usually people only have about one link to an article or site to share and removes the discussion.

But consider maybe an entire article about the queer community, and only mentioned the word "asexuality" one time.

Yet the links you mentioned have a strong asexual presence in the article.

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Eh. Creating a thread like this almost gets rid of all threads in this forum.

Usually people only have about one link to an article or site to share and removes the discussion.

But consider maybe an entire article about the queer community, and only mentioned the word "asexuality" one time.

Yet the links you mentioned have a strong asexual presence in the article.
Well, yeah. Then people who want to discuss can create their own thread.
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  • 2 weeks later...
alpacaterpillar

The queer club at my university mentions on its Facebook page that it includes asexuals :)

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The Great WTF

There is a brief mention of asexuality at the bottom of this awesome article.

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so, i was reading an article on myths about sex and at the end, it includes the fact that "some people don't have much of an interest in sex at all," and links to the aven homepage. it's not much, but i was very pleasantly surprised! :)
http://www.policymic.com/articles/88029/17-lies-we-need-to-stop-teaching-girls-about-sex

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catsaregood

Cool! Nice find - every bit of visibility helps :)

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  • 1 month later...
Mezzo Forte

Though it is not discussed in the video, but at 7:55, there is an image of a sort of "LGBT" spectrum, and asexuality is listed on the image.

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When I worked at DWP they include a link to AVEN on the diversity pages :)

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There's an article that came up on Google in today's Sydney Morning Herald. It's by Matty Silver and called Don't Be Too Hasty With Labels. The whole of it is a sort of damning with faint praise summing up of asexuality as an invention of David Jay's. :( I can't understand why she can accept orientation being on a spectrum between heterosexual and homosexual, but not see how just not being attracted at all is an option.

She obviously sees asexuality as an abnormality to be treated. Such a shame, as attitudes like hers cause asexual people to feel shamed or broken.

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catsaregood

There's an article that came up on Google in today's Sydney Morning Herald. It's by Matty Silver and called Don't Be Too Hasty With Labels. The whole of it is a sort of damning with faint praise summing up of asexuality as an invention of David Jay's. :( I can't understand why she can accept orientation being on a spectrum between heterosexual and homosexual, but not see how just not being attracted at all is an option.

She obviously sees asexuality as an abnormality to be treated. Such a shame, as attitudes like hers cause asexual people to feel shamed or broken.

Wow, this was quite a find, MT! You're right, attitudes like this can do so much damage. What an awful and condescending article. These paragraphs were particularly offensive:

"The literal definition of asexuality means “without sexuality” but it is not possible to be without sexuality. We are all sexual beings from the day we are born until the day we die and whether or not we act on this is a choice.

However what is important is, why someone wants to identify as asexual – I believe people who claim to be asexual should explore a full range of possibilities that may affect their sexual desire. A number of things could be going on, but a person’s sexuality will always be present."

So handy to have an expert on hand to explain how you are just completely wrong about yourself and how you feel :sarcastic face:

If you want to read it all: http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life/asexuality-dont-be-too-hasty-with-labels-20140623-zsicx.html#ixzz35T0eKg99

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What a patronizing article. Gee, so my identification as asexual is because I have a sexual dysfunction of some kind?

What a bag of wind.

"Sexuality is normal as breathing"? What kind of sex therapist uses a word like "normal"? I'll tell you what: a judgemental one.

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Sir_Lord_Brit

In one the Choice of Games text adventure games, named Choice of Kung Fu, it is entirely possible to be asexual. Not just have no love interest (although that's the only pronounced result), but actually choose 'neither of them' when asked about which gender you find most attractive (or a question to that effect)

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I don't think this needs its own thread, but it is interesting (and odd).

There's a movie, Bad Biology made back in 2008. You can find it on youtube, but it's a horror/comedy/porno so be warned.

One of the characters says he thought the main girl was asexual. It's played as a joke because the main girl has sex a lot(porno remember!).

It's really just one line of dialog, but yep, it's in there and talk about an odd movie to talk about us.

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Season 1, episode 9 of Modern Family ...the Fizbo the clown episode. Asexuality is mention (Fizbo is asexual).

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Certified Cake Decorator

In the tv show Sirens a character named VooDoo is Asexual. She specifically states that she doesn't like this community though. And also she is kinda a weirdo compared to the other characters. And that's saying something!

Not the best representstion, but she gets a whole lotta attention from one of the main guy characters that is crushing on her, and in turn, screen time.

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http://notalwaysfriendly.com/immature-irony/35599


Immature Irony

(I am currently sat in the school common room with a bunch of friends — we’re all in our last year of school. I’m struggling with my sexuality and believe I may be asexual or aromantic. I’ve decided to explain my situation to my friends, almost like I was coming out.)

Me: “So yeah, I did a bunch of research on it and I thought about it for a good while. I’m not sure but I really think I could be asexual. I got 69% asexual on an Internet sexuality test but I—”

All Friends: *laughing*

Me: “Guys, this is serious! You’re the first people I’ve even mentioned this to!”

Friend #1: “69!”

All Friends: *laughing even harder*

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Taki's Magazine describes its first experience of A-wareness in its usual snarky fashion.

http://takimag.com/article/a_community_for_the_non_horny_jim_goad/print#axzz3Ek4dZJkA

Hard to tell if the author really gets it or not, beneath all the snark for which he is well-known, but hopefully it will bring a smile to the faces of those who both know this community and have seen the same sort of wise-ass non-comprehension before.

Rock on, y'all.

A Community for the Non-Horny

by Jim Goad

September 29, 2014

asexuallogo.jpg

Asexuality: It’s not just for plants anymore.

Nay, it is now a designated sexual identity for humans who aren’t horny. But it is much more than merely an individual identity. Because the Internet makes everything exasperatingly social, asexual individuals now also comprise a community. Even more aggravatingly, asexuality is a movement. It’s a moving community. It’s a community that’s moving around, not having sex. It is a living, breathing, moving community of sexually disinterested individuals whose lack of shared attraction acts like a magnet drawing them all together under the same limp, dry umbrella.

Members of the asexual movement are quick to distinguish themselves from celibates. The latter, they argue, are innately horny yet restrain themselves from acting upon their carnal impulses. Asexuals, however, simply aren’t interested in sex. Whether that qualifies as a sexual orientation or a sexual disorientation is anyone’s guess.

Asexual activists—yes, they exist, and c’mon, if they’re not having sex they have to be active doing something—successfully agitated the American Psychiatric Association to designate asexuality as a legitimate identity rather than a medical or psychological dysfunction in the latest version of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.

“Ironically, the asexuals—who refuse to take it in any hole—wind up getting it from all sides.”

They have also gone to great pains to buttress and legitimize their abject absence of libidinousness and concupiscence with scholarly works such as 1977’s pioneering paper Asexual and Autoerotic Women: Two Invisible Groupsand 2008’s Coming to an Asexual Identity: Negotiating Identity, Negotiating Desire. This month saw the release of a full-length book called The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality, which will surely become the Mein Kampf of the chronically un-aroused.

The asexual community boasts an absurdly vast pool of resources for individuals who wish to bond and network with the sexually disinclined. This past June saw the second annual International Asexuality Conference in Toronto. Asexual Awareness Week is coming in late October. There are even asexual dating sites. And Tumblr—which is ground zero for sexual insanity on the Web, the crossroads where sexual deviancy and social-justice platitudes converge in one gooey rainbow-colored train wreck—is a comic gold mine for hysterical asexual sloganeering.

By far the most prominent organization that propagates and disseminates asexual “awareness” is the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN), which was founded in 2001 and hosts a website that answers Frequently Asked Questions and a forum with over two million posts by people who’d much prefer to shove cake in their mouths than someone else’s genitals. AVEN even designed an asexual logo—an upside-down triangle with purple piping that tastefully encases a white-to-black gradient.

Like any community, asexuals have developed their own language. I’ve considerately decoded much of the arcane terminology they employ to denote the vast “asexual spectrum”:

ACE…shorthand for “asexual”

ACEVAGUE…someone who may be asexual as a result of being autistic

ALLOSEXUAL…those who aren’t asexual, otherwise known as “normal people”

AROMANTIC…those who don’t desire romance, either

AROVAGUE…someone who may be aromantic as a result of being autistic

BIROMANTIC…those who desire romantic (but not sexual) relationships with either gender

CUPIOSEXUAL…an asexual who wishes they were an allosexual

DEMISEXUAL…an asexual who is able to muster sexual attraction only after first forming a romantic bond with someone

GREYSEXUAL…someone who inhabits a space somewhere along the vast spectrum between asexuals and allosexuals

PAN-HOMOROMANTIC POLYAMOROUS GREY-ASEXUAL GENDERQUEER…the highly specific sexual self-identifier of this logo designer

REPULSED ASEXUAL…someone who is actively disgusted at the very idea of having sexual contact with someone else

SQUISH…the platonic form of a romantic crush

Well, if that list didn’t kill your sex drive, I’m not sure what will.

Still, the asexual movement presses forward, fired up by its inability to get turned on. Once someone has “come out” as asexual, these sexually inactive activists tend to do what members of every other allegedly “oppressed” special-interest identity group does: They lecture people.

DO NOT call them frigid.

DO NOT call them repressed.

DO NOT call them crazy.

DO NOT assume they were molested.

DO NOT suggest they have a hormonal imbalance.

DO NOT insinuate that they merely haven’t met someone who knows how to properly “deliver the groceries.”

Hilariously—because intersectional squabbling among self-designated victim groups is always hilarious—asexuals have tried noodling their way into the so-called LGBT movement, only to be rebuffed by many homosexuals, bisexuals, and transsexuals who scoff at the idea that asexuality is a sexual orientation. Many traditional “queers” get their assless leather chaps chafed at asexuals who try to claim the term “queer” for themselves, arguing that “queer” denotes non-hetero manifestations of human sexuality—emphasis on the “sexuality.” Ironically, the asexuals—who refuse to take it in any hole—wind up getting it from all sides.

Edited by ithaca
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Taki's Magazine describes its first experience of A-wareness in its usual snarky fashion.

http://takimag.com/article/a_community_for_the_non_horny_jim_goad/print#axzz3Ek4dZJkA

Hard to tell if the author really gets it or not, beneath all the snark for which he is well-known, but hopefully it will bring a smile to the faces of those who both know this community and have seen the same sort of wise-ass non-comprehension before.

Rock on, y'all.

I know I loved it XD

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A Taste of Harmony

https://ascension101.com/en/home/free-articles/94-june-2014/444-falling-in-love.html

Individual perspective can be a refreshing thing. More and more we can share things in a boarder view can be a positive thing.

Inelia Benz has a unique view about the world and she explores the topic, "love" more in a sense of "romantic love" for people. In that she sees and recognises asexuality. I liked her approach based on acceptance of asexuality. It's a bit long and explores many layers of aspects of "romantic love".

...

And at a physical level, and at a 3d level, sometimes the only way to have a taste of that wholeness and completeness is to merge with one individual. Physically, emotionally, mentally, and energetically.

And of course if you are asexual and you dont have any interest in sexual contact with another person, either male or female. But you still have the other, you see, you still have that program that says the only way you can have this, this merging, this being complete is if you mate with somebody else, you partner up with somebody else.

And of course, you know, the majority of the population is either heterosexual or homosexual, an asexual person has very little choices with regards to whom they feel that connection with.

And they will be in a relationship that requires them to have sexual intercourse when they dont really want to.

Yes the hugs and kisses, often. They put up with it.

In a not so far away time in linear time, and even nowadays in many societies if you are homosexual, you couldnt have that merging with somebody of your choice because the sex part was tied into it.

...

Now lets have a look at unconditional in relationship to falling in love.

Unconditional, if you were in love with somebody, would you unconditionally be happy to let them go so they can be happy somewhere else, with somebody else?

No, that would hurt. You have conditions around falling in love, depending on your culture and the way you were brought up.

For us in the West the conditions are, faithfulness, the conditions are, exclusivity, the conditions are, we are going to be living together, were going to belong to each other.

All these conditions, its way, way far away from unconditional love.

Often a relationship that lasts and evolves into something more could be unconditional.

But society makes it extremely difficult to have a relationship of unconditional love.

Fear comes in right away. Because if you think unconditional it means, that person is going to hurt me immediately. That person is going to go off and be with somebody else, and thats painful.

Conditional means that you need to be physically with that person, thats conditional.

Unconditional doesnt need to, you have no need.

And this is one of the key words again, so one of them will be unconditional.

The other one is Need.

For as long as you have a need in any of these programs, you are playing the game.

So one of the homework will be to look at these programs and say ok, do I have a need for this? And why do I need it?

And why are we looking at these programs?

Because most of the time were moving through life with these programs at an unconscious level.

And when we work from an unconscious level we fall into all sorts of bad situations and traps. As soon as we become aware of them and conscious, we have a choice, we have a choice, it doesnt mean, ok so now Im aware that when I think about falling in love what Im talking really about is belonging to somebody or somebody belongs to me, so thats bad, so I have to process that away. No, its not about that, its about acknowledging and recognizing, I want to be with somebody who I belong to and I own and I consciously make that decision, because it comes from a conscious decision, you know what youre getting into.

And then when jealousy pops up, because theres a fear of loss, you know where thats coming from.

...

Personal interest was to discover why sometimes I feel fear, pain, resistance, hurt in various intensity through relationships with people regardless of its nature. It makes me ponder what kind of fear, survival based "need" I carry around in my everyday living. How to recognise those and make conscious choice to release them and desire to self empower myself have led me to this article.

Asexuality is not a major discussion point but I was very glad to come across the mentioning. :)

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MystiqueSister

Taki's Magazine describes its first experience of A-wareness in its usual snarky fashion.

http://takimag.com/article/a_community_for_the_non_horny_jim_goad/print#axzz3Ek4dZJkA

Hard to tell if the author really gets it or not, beneath all the snark for which he is well-known, but hopefully it will bring a smile to the faces of those who both know this community and have seen the same sort of wise-ass non-comprehension before.

Rock on, y'all.

Under the snark, lurks the truth. Love it. I also had a lol at the comments underneath this which read;

"Isn't "biromantic" a sexual attraction to ballpoint pens?"

to which the next commenter answered;

"That would be BICromantic ;) "

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  • 5 weeks later...

The documentary 'A Brony Tale' just released on Netflix and when they go an talk to the psychologists/researchers of the Brony Study they do a section on sexual orientation and include the fact that 3% of Bronies identified themselves as ace. They then explain what asexuality is.

As a Brony and an ace that was really cool to see.

2015 Edit - For future reference:

Relevant bit:

Whole documentary:

Edited by ithaca
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