Alawyn-Aebt Posted October 7, 2019 Share Posted October 7, 2019 4 hours ago, Sun444 said: I'm at that point now (and I'm sure a lot of you can relate) where literally every time I make friends with a girl someone in my family will be like "ooo it's finally happening!" Yep, had this more than once. Lucky for me only my grandmother really gets this way, my siblings don't care (besides making half-jokes from time to time about it). It's really an odd feeling when you are the oldest sibling and have no interest in dating, and yet your younger sister complains about not dating. 4 hours ago, Sun444 said: was looking up some of my friends on Instagram and told me which one of them I should ask out. I still don't know how to feel about all that I told my parents about a female glorified acquaintance of mine and next thing I know they were looking her up. It was all fairly awkward. They were way too interested in her. I thought, that's why I never told you about the girl I walked out of class together with for an entire semester, I feared this might happen. I have since been much more careful how I talk about who I know to my parents, I switch to the all-handy third-person gender-neutral plural pronouns when referring to them. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Solaristik Posted October 7, 2019 Share Posted October 7, 2019 7 hours ago, naakka said: I too wish that I could just come out to the friends and family members most close to me, but it just seems like never is the right time. Actually, I've tried to come out a few times irl, but they just didn't get it even if I told it as clearly as I could (didn't say I'm asexual as I think no-one has a clue what it means and don't want to have to prove it exists and isn't just some new trendy internet thing). I think people just won't register your "I'm not interested in dating/ in boys/girls/ in relationships" because of in their mind that option does not exist, so it just sounds like an excuse for them. So the actual problem is that no-one takes aces seriously. I don't think I'm even ready to come out yet, I'm still figuring my stuff out and I think that would only complicate things further. "Not interested in a relationship" is pretty much the most accurate thing I can say at the moment 5 hours ago, Aebt-Ætheling said: Yep, had this more than once. Lucky for me only my grandmother really gets this way, my siblings don't care (besides making half-jokes from time to time about it). It's really an odd feeling when you are the oldest sibling and have no interest in dating, and yet your younger sister complains about not dating. My parents are kinda over it now, my mom used to be really bad about it but I think she realized that she wasn't helping. Now it doesn't happen as much. Really only my sister gets strange about it sometimes now. I hope it's just something that will go away with time 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
naakka Posted October 7, 2019 Share Posted October 7, 2019 1 hour ago, Sun444 said: I don't think I'm even ready to come out yet, I'm still figuring my stuff out and I think that would only complicate things further. "Not interested in a relationship" is pretty much the most accurate thing I can say at the moment That's cool, take your time ^^ I did that too, for the longest time I just told people I'm not interested in dating right now or I'm not ready yet for a relationship. Both of which were technically true, even if they didn't really let people know the main point. It was kinda like getting a time out when I needed it and still not coming out before being confident enough. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GlamRocker Posted October 7, 2019 Share Posted October 7, 2019 Time for kissy face! MMMMMMMMuh! Oh shit, now you're hard. Sorry, man. #RomanticAsexualproblems 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
rainbowocollie Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 So I got accused of "wanting to be special" because I happened to mention I might be asexual. I don't think that guy understood what asexuality is, but I don't understand how not wanting to have sex is a "special snowflake" thing. Gray-a and that, I can understand WHY people would think the grey area is a "wanting to be special thing", even though I think the grey area is legit and exists for a reason. 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
crazy ace Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 On 10/8/2019 at 2:47 AM, questdrivencollie said: So I got accused of "wanting to be special" because I happened to mention I might be asexual. I don't think that guy understood what asexuality is, but I don't understand how not wanting to have sex is a "special snowflake" thing. What I hate is that I heard something similar- "you're just trying to conform to society." Yeah, cause this is obviously something I control, and obviously just like everyone else. Also, yeah- how is not wanting to have sex "special?" 6 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rhyme Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 I'm 21 and I tutor a 16-year-old in English and Maths, and yesterday I lowkey got shamed for being ace. She asked if I was I'd ever been in a relationship, and then if I'm still virgin, to which I answered yes to both. She laughed like she pitied me. It was so fucking embarrassing; not because I'm ashamed of either of those things, but because a 16-year-old treated me like an innocent child. 10 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pheedre Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 On 10/3/2019 at 8:44 AM, Laplace said: I swear some people have the IQ of a turd. Lolol, sorry this just made me chuckle. And quite right I might add! 😂 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Laplace Posted October 10, 2019 Share Posted October 10, 2019 On 10/7/2019 at 12:08 AM, Sun444 said: I don't know why I have such a hard time telling my family that I'm not interested in a relationship. I'm at that point now (and I'm sure a lot of you can relate) where literally every time I make friends with a girl someone in my family will be like "ooo it's finally happening!" That “it’s finally happening” BS is why I never refer(red) to any female friends by name or gender when with my parents. I got a ride home from a female coworker cause the Bart train was out one day and I just said a coworker gave me a ride home; my dad just assumed it was a guy and I was like, “Yeah totally, it was indeed a guy 🙃.” 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bio 7 Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 16 hours ago, Rhyme said: I'm 21 and I tutor a 16-year-old in English and Maths, and yesterday I lowkey got shamed for being ace. She asked if I was I'd ever been in a relationship, and then if I'm still virgin, to which I answered yes to both. She laughed like she pitied me. It was so fucking embarrassing; not because I'm ashamed of either of those things, but because a 16-year-old treated me like an innocent child. It’s odd that she would even ask any of that, it sounds a bit rude to ask for that information. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bronztrooper Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 On 10/11/2019 at 12:38 AM, Bio 7 said: It’s odd that she would even ask any of that, it sounds a bit rude to ask for that information. I dealt with those questions quite a bit in school. Seems like it's one of those things teens don't think anything about asking Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kimgosling14 Posted October 13, 2019 Share Posted October 13, 2019 Made the mistake of joining Tinder- so many people trying to tell me “you’re just scared”, “you’re confused” or “you won’t know for sure unless you try it” 😅 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
starweb Posted October 13, 2019 Share Posted October 13, 2019 On 10/10/2019 at 8:11 AM, Rhyme said: I'm 21 and I tutor a 16-year-old in English and Maths, and yesterday I lowkey got shamed for being ace. She asked if I was I'd ever been in a relationship, and then if I'm still virgin, to which I answered yes to both. She laughed like she pitied me. It was so fucking embarrassing; not because I'm ashamed of either of those things, but because a 16-year-old treated me like an innocent child. Why give her an answer? I'd say it's none of her business. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guilli Milli Mu Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 "How do you know you are asexual if you never done sex before?" or "You just didn't find the right person" #asexualproblems 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
nerdperson777 Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 1 hour ago, Guilli Milli Mu said: "How do you know you are asexual if you never done sex before?" or "You just didn't find the right person" #asexualproblems The answer is, for straight people, "how do you know you're straight if you've never had gay sex before?" "You just didn't find the right same sex person." 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Internetlionboy Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 Good ol' "You can't be asexual if you like having sex!" Hmm if I can't do that, I will go commit arson now /s Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Zagadka Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 You know that feeling when it is getting into your head that you need to masturbate, but you can't get in the mood or really want to, so you try watching some porn, and it is just... horrible. My brain and body are refusing to cooperate this week. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Solitary Lotus Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 Whenever you offer to help someone, but the person interprets it as flirting. 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rhyme Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 11 hours ago, starweb said: Why give her an answer? I'd say it's none of her business. I just answered automatically, as I tend to do when the answer to a question is easy Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 5 hours ago, Solitary Lotus said: Whenever you offer to help someone, but the person interprets it as flirting. THIS!!! Like, please get over yourself, I’m being nice, I don’t have to like someone romantically to treat them well. Is that a thing straight people do? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
naakka Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 2 minutes ago, i.r3beka said: THIS!!! Like, please get over yourself, I’m being nice, I don’t have to like someone romantically to treat them well. Is that a thing straight people do? Haha yes, "you mean if I don't bite your head off I want to get intimate" kind of dichotomy. Sometimes I wonder if I'm really the only one who's willing to do nice things for people just for the sake of liking that and not to get something in return 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pheedre Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 8 hours ago, nerdperson777 said: The answer is, for straight people, "how do you know you're straight if you've never had gay sex before?" "You just didn't find the right same sex person." Hahah! This is brilliant! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 5 minutes ago, naakka said: Haha yes, "you mean if I don't bite your head off I want to get intimate" kind of dichotomy. Sometimes I wonder if I'm really the only one who's willing to do nice things for people just for the sake of liking that and not to get something in return Ugh right? I don’t know what allos are thinking. Even if I DID want a relationship with most people I’m nice to which I DON’T, {I’m nice to people I don’t find aesthetically pleasing because isn’t everybody?} my idea of a romantic relationship is closer to a friendship than anything else I can name. And allos insistence on making everything mean something is so incredibly juvenile, tantamount to a kindergartner going “oOoOoH he LiKeS you.” Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pheedre Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 1 minute ago, i.r3beka said: And allos insistence on making everything mean something is so incredibly juvenile, tantamount to a kindergartner going “oOoOoH he LiKeS you.” This is how I feel about sex in general lol, it's such a base, carnal "need", I'm like can't we just pull ourselves together and not be animals for sec? Lol, but that's just me. Not meaning to offend anyone. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 @Pheedre If that’s an offensive opinion to have then I am offensive as well because I agree 100%. 🤷🏻♀️ Maybe that just comes from being a repulsed Ace. It’s refreshing to hear relatable opinions on this site. It’s feels sometimes like the entire world is obsessed with spam and I’m the only one saying “that’s gross.” Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Pheedre Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 3 minutes ago, i.r3beka said: @Pheedre If that’s an offensive opinion to have then I am offensive as well because I agree 100%. 🤷🏻♀️ Maybe that just comes from being a repulsed Ace. It’s refreshing to hear relatable opinions on this site. It’s feels sometimes like the entire world is obsessed with spam and I’m the only one saying “that’s gross.” Me too! I scroll through my FB and just roll my eyes 🙄 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Laplace Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 7 hours ago, Solitary Lotus said: Whenever you offer to help someone, but the person interprets it as flirting. This is basically the reason I think people got attached to me in college. I like helping people when I’m good at something so I’d help people study and stuff for nothing in return. I’m just a helpful guy, I’m not making an investment in someone to hopefully get a romantic/sexual return later. We’re comrades in arms; that’s reason enough to help a bit. 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Akiharu Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 Coming out to your parents and your mother be like "I think I might be an asexual too" #asexualproblems 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Neutral Charge Posted October 14, 2019 Share Posted October 14, 2019 2 minutes ago, Akiharu said: Coming out to your parents and your mother be like "I think I might be an asexual too" #asexualproblems this is so funny, i can totally see my mom saying that. sorry, i know its not the best thing to say but it sounds so familiar =))) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
griffinej5 Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 I met a person yesterday who I’ve only known on a Facebook group for a while. He friend requested me, I accepted it. He also send me a message on messenger. Started out as a general nice to finally meet. I was there with a friend. His next message was something about us being lovely ladies. What the heck? Is he being friendly, or is he meaning something further? I have to show this to someone else for an opinion. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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