Examples about Gray-romantic?

[grayagirlxxx]

I wonder my romantic orientation and would like to know more about gray-romantic, how it is different from aromantic and romantic orientations? Any every day examples?

[5_♦♣]

It's inbetween romantic and aromantic. That is, gray romantics experience romantic attraction, but not as often as typical/regular romantics.

[Member54880]

On this FAQ check the gray-romantic sections. I consider myself gray-romantic because I rarely experience romantic attraction, and don't have much of a desire for romantic relationships.

[grayagirlxxx]

I don´t understand romantic attraction, what is means. Squishes and crushes sound so similar.

[Guest]

Some people, especially those in the aromantic spectrum (which greyromantics are a part of), can't tell the difference between platonic feelings and romantic feelings. Maybe that's the case for you?

For what it's worth, I also identify as greyromantic :) The reason is that I experience romantic attraction on a less frequent basis than most romantics, and only after a warm-up period (i.e. I have to know the person and get along with them, otherwise I can't feel attracted to them).

[Didi]

I was wondering how common gray-romanticism is? And how others define it for themselves? I'm asking because, while I identify as gray-romantic, I have a hard time telling if what I experience is more of a "crush" or a "squish." I think it's generally somewhere in between but that's a bit difficult to explain. I wouldn't mind (and sometimes think I'd like) living with someone, holding hands, getting married, etc. But I think of it as more of a "best of friends" kind of scenario. Would this qualify as queerplatonic?

Anyway, what's it like for other people who identify as gray-romantic?

(I wasn't sure if this should go in The Gray Area; that seemed to be more about gray-asexuality rather than gray-romanticism though. Feel free to move this mods!)

[Robin L]

I am gray-romantic. I define it because...it's difficult to explain. That's kinda what the label is for.

I do experience romantic attraction, but not as strongly, and do not desire a romantic relationship.

(this might fit in the romantic orientations section)

[Guest]

Hey there, fellow greyromantics ^_^

I'm part of the spectrum, although I personally have no problem telling apart a squish from a crush. It takes me time to understand, recognise, and acknowledge my romantic feelings for someone, and they only develop after I've known (and liked) the person for some time... quite a rare occurrence, given my "type" of person (character-wise). The frequency and modality with which I experience romantic attraction are my biggest reasons for identifying as greyromantic, together with the fact that I'm okay with being single as well.

The type of relationship I'm envisioning is a lot like yours: exclusive, physically affectionate, living together and all that... I call it romantic, but it's just a name after all. If I met an aromantic person who was willing to have one such relationship with me, and we both loved each other, I'd go for it without a second thought!

[Lia]

Moved to Romantic and Aromantic Orientations.

Lia

Asexual Q&A Mod

[Arctangent]

I was wondering how common gray-romanticism is? And how others define it for themselves? I'm asking because, while I identify as gray-romantic, I have a hard time telling if what I experience is more of a "crush" or a "squish." I think it's generally somewhere in between but that's a bit difficult to explain.

I'm in a similar position to you (i.e. I have trouble distinguishing between squishes and crushes) and I identified as grey-romantic until recently. It made sense to me because the attractions themselves often seemed to fall into a grey area between platonic and romantic feelings. I think it's valid to identify as grey-romantic if you fall into that position. There are also some grey-romantics who still differentiate well between the two, but they experience romantic attraction so rarely that they're functionally aromantic most of the time. That makes sense to me too - I think there are a number of valid reasons why a person might choose to identify as grey-romantic, just as the AVENwiki article for it implies.

For me, the whole squish/crush distinction has gotten so ambiguous that I no longer describe myself in terms of a romantic identity. WTFromantic is probably the closest, but I feel a little iffy about using that term for various reasons. I've decided it's simpler to keep it unspecified and leave it up to interpretation, at least for the time being. So, that's another option in case you find labeling yourself to be problematic. Of course, it's up to you to decide what works best for you and your own experiences. :)

I wouldn't mind (and sometimes think I'd like) living with someone, holding hands, getting married, etc. But I think of it as more of a "best of friends" kind of scenario. Would this qualify as queerplatonic?

Sometimes, it can be hard to tell whether a particular relationship "qualifies" as (queer)platonic or romantic. Personally, I don't think there's any universal set of qualities that defines a relationship as platonic or romantic. It's completely possible for one person to view a particular relationship as romantic and the other to see it as not romantic at all. Ultimately, it's up to the people involved and what they feel works best to define the relationship.

[5_♦♣]

Gray Romanticism: A few questions has been merged with this one.

C.C.

Romantic and Aromantic Orientations Moderator.

[grayagirlxxx]

In my opinion there is not enough information about gray-romantic anywhere, some kind of model would help, but I read on one place (can´t remember from where) that it can be thought same way as gray-A definition.


Now I found that text: "Grayromantic, also sometimes called demiromantic, is basically the same principle as gray-asexual and demisexual." http://asexualadvice.tumblr.com/post/12028150428/oops-sorry-i-meant-gray-romantic-instead-of

[Guest]

The "same principle" means that greyromantic is to romantic what grey-asexual is to sexual. :) Basically, they both describe "grey areas", the former between aromanticism and romanticism, and the latter between asexuality and sexuality. They definitely aren't synonyms!

[5_♦♣]

Split thread Gray Asexuality and gray romanticism has been merged with this one.

C.C.

Romantic and Aromantic Orientations Moderator.