When did you hit puberty?

[Xenon]

Late. Had it taken any longer, my parents would likely have sought medical advice on the matter. As it is, I didn't reach my full height until I was 21, and as late as age 25 I didn't need to shave every day.

No effect on self-esteem. Not known if this is a factor in my lack of sex drive.

[Guest IrishGirl]

Don't know what counts as early or late but I was 11 and had a bra before any of the other girls in my class (as far as I know) It was so embarrassing. I was picked on by a few who hadn't developed yet. Most caught up soon enough and it stopped being so important to me. Not sure about the the theories on the effect on self esteem. I would have preferred to be in the "normal" age range at the time since I hated the attention. I still hate any sort of attention but I don't know if this is the early puberty or if it just was a problem for me because I'm asexual.

[smellincoffee]

Relatively late, if I remember correctly. I didn't have to shave until I was close to eighteen.

[Ziffler]

I was late 13 just a few weeks of 14 when I had my first ejaculation. It scared me to death. Back in the dark ages, no one talked about such things so I had no idea what happened. I thought I had broke something.

Didn't find out until school started in sex ed class what happened and from then on, it was my favorite toy. :D

[Schala Zeal]

I hit puberty at 15, through 20 or so. Nothing before 15-16. I wish it never happened - I got the wrong puberty altogether, although much milder effects from what is expected to be brought out from puberty (voice changed little, muscles developed nearly none, relatively short, relatively very slim (still healthy), beard developed pretty late and little but THAT mostly I wish it never ever happened at all >_<, body hair relatively little to lower average, except more on legs (shaved all the time now, two days to regrow), none in armpits, pubic is normal I guess.

Well, on topic with the puberty I never had and am scheduled to have - I don't need a bra yet, I sure hope anytime soon (I'm 23). I hate to be 'pretending' to have breasts (with padding, forms etc) and so I don't, I want my natural ones to grow and even though it hurts in a way (to wait) - I'm willing to wait the time I'll need for it.

[SpirallingSnowy]

I was late....And i got teased for it....

I started wearing bras around 15 even tho i really didnt need them, being a AA then and all, i was jsut being teased and didnt want to be different. I didn't get my period till i was 16. I never had to shave my legs or armpits till i was 17. I had severe acne from 13-17, and have had acne ever since. I was bullied at school, low self esteem, few friends, and i was conisdered childish and immature by 90% of my year. Also im short. but im taller than my mum. But still only 160cms/5'4" tall. Most of my friends were younger than me and started developing wayyyyy before i did!!

[Nazg]

About average, I was 12 or 13. :) Most of the girls in my class hit puberty earlier than me.

[niteshade]

My chest only started growing a bit just recently; however, my period began when I was thirteen. I've always had very low self esteem, and have never had a sex drive.

So who knows where that puts me on the scale, eh?

[Brodertun]

I hit puberty over a year before the school showed us the puberty video to let us know what was going to happen to our bodies. The year of video the only girls who went through puberty (everyone told) were the ones who had failed or been held back.

I also started my period before my sister had hers, and she's 3 years older than me.

[UglymanCometh]

As any psychologist worth their salt can tell you, males that hit puberty at a relatively young age generally have high self esteem and a high sex drive.

Funny. I hit puberty at 12. Sex drive kicked in at 17.

And I haven't believed in "self-esteem" since 14.

....and as far as that "pick of partners" thing. That's the biggest fallacy I've heard since the beginning of the War or Iraq. Trust me.

[Boq]

I voted "about average." I know at least as far back as six years old, I would "pleasure myself" (masturbate seems a misleading term in this context), which would cause a "dry orgasm." I did this quite frequently whenever no one was around. One day, when I was 13, this sticky white substance came out, so it was no longer quite so convenient. Also around that time I started getting facial hair and acne, and my voice lowered. That's also when I was just learning about sex in school, and masturbation was in the news thanks to Jocelyn Elders. Once I realized that what I had been doing all these years was "sex with myself," I felt I was doing something bad (for some reason), so I stopped. After a week or so, I no longer felt the urge. It wasn't until ten years later that I started up again, so I still do it periodically, mainly as a stress-reliever. I have to wonder how much anxiety I could have avoided in high school and college had I not given up masturbation.

The other part of this equation is that I'm an asexual fetishist. As I've said in other threads, my attraction is solely toward the fetish, and I have absolutely no interest in sexual intercourse, and the sight of sex organs is a total turnoff (a 'boner kill,' if you will). One part of the fetish has always been with me, and that's what I would think about back in my pre-puberty days while "pleasuring."

Y'know how girls have 'cooties' until boys start going through puberty? Well, I never had a problem hanging out with girls, but I experienced the 'cootie' aversion toward one of my fetishes, rather than girls. (Edited to add: Isn't it kinda strange that I didn't like [insert name of fetish object here], yet I had no problem thinking about it in order to attain arousal?!) The other fetish I call "latent" because it was certainly there prior to puberty -- I remember being intrigued by it -- but I did not experience the 'cootie' feeling, and it wasn't nearly as strong as the other fetish until I hit puberty.

This was certainly not anything I was ever taught, and to this day no one outside this message board knows I'm a fetishist. My personal experience, to me, pretty much blows the "but [fill in name of sexual orientation here] is a choice!!" mantra out of the water. I never chose to be this way, and you'd be hard pressed to find anyone who would ever raise a child to be sexually attracted to the things I'm sexually attracted to.

Am I happy being who I am? You bet! It doesn't really cause any problems.

Even so, would I still prefer to be normal so I could live like the vast majority of society? ...Yeah. :-

Boq

[The_Echidna]

I picked early, although it seems a bit open to interpretation. I was 11 when I first got my period, and it has never been a good experience. I may have told this story here before, but I'm going to tell it again, because it sort of explains why I think 11 is early to begin menstrating.

At this stage, no one had ever explained what periods or puberty or anything like this was. So, on the day that I woke up to find blood in my underpants I freaked out. I was very very scared that something was wrong, because as far as I was concerned you weren't supposed to bleed from there. And blood coming from places it shouldn't be coming from is bad. Stupidly I was too scared to tell my Parents about it, so I hid my underpants and hoped it would fix itself. Obviously it didn't, and just kept getting worse, but the longer I left it, the harder it was to tell my parents. Eventually my mum found all my bloodied underwear, and came to my school, took me out of class and gave me a very brief lesson on Puberty and Periods, before teaching me how to change a pad, stocking me up with pads and taking me back to class. I was very embarrassed, but also very very relived, as I had convinced myself I was going to die.

My mum ended up talking to the Teacher, and a few weeks later we watched the wonderful video on puberty.

So, there were no wonderful presents, or nice lunches or even pancakes in the shape of sexual reproduction organs for me. What happened wasn't really anyone's fault, and I'm not angry about it really. It was just really bad timing. And while I'm glad I wasn't dying, I still wish I didn't have periods, but that's another story for another time perhaps.

I can't imagine what it must be like, to have to wait for puberty to hit while watching all your friends develope, and feeling like you're getting left behind. The whole puberty thing is just awful, for girls and guys. If only there where another option.

[Fayetje]

Relatively early, I'd say.

Got boobs at 8. Period at 11. Various hair at 12. Height didn't come until 13. :/

Sex drive doesn't exist, never did. Self-esteem....ehhh...I'm a bit on the low side but I don't completely hate myself.

[Akasha]

I have not hit it :roll:

[Parth]

I hit puberty at about 13, but it stopped about half way. :(

[Run]

For the male in body: Average age for onset of puberty is 11-14. First signs: genital enlargement and pubic hair growth.

Assuming this is true, I was about average age. 12-13 was when it started.

[Frigid Pink]

About average.

[Apophyllite]

As any psychologist worth their salt can tell you, males that hit puberty at a relatively young age generally have high self esteem and a high sex drive. Women that hit puberty at a late age, conversely, have high self esteem and a relatively low sex drive. In regards to either sex, those that hit puberty at a young age tend to prefer the opposite sex in a highly masculinized or feminized form, respectively.

As many psychologists state (and forgive me for sounding like i'm_frigid), those that hit puberty at an early age represent the alpha males and alpha females of a society, and typically can have their pick of any mate, and have a high sex drive to match it. This has led me to wonder if many of us asexuals therefore represent "beta" males and females- those that reached puberty at a late age.

I started early. When I was about 9, I started getting breasts and had my period for 10 days. Then it stopped for a couple years and came back when I was like 11; it still isn't regular though..

As for self esteem- I always thought of myself as having not-so-good body-image (though it has been improving over the years), and although I get insecure about things, I don't try to change who I am to conform to anything or fit in- so I guess it's sort of like, I feel like I have low self esteem at times, but it's really not all that bad, and I'm secure enough with who I am that I don't feel like I have to change for someone else.

I never thought of myself as an alpha- throughout most of my life, I've been more of a passive observer, keeping some sort of distance between me and the world, so I guess I'm not really sure about that. I usually can take control if needed, but I usually don't because I often feel it's not my place to make decisions about things that won't affect me much.

I've never been really attracted to "highly masculinized" men, whether the masculinization is a physical or mental quality. And about "having my pick of a mate," I wouldn't know, because I don't pursue relationships, though some people would probably say I could if I wanted to.

[Pixies]

I got my first period at age eight. That was before I'd gotten "The Talk", so naturally I decided (very calmly and rationally) that I was dying or something. I don't remember when my family found out or when I realized that I wasn't dying. Breasts and height came later, around age twelve.

Self esteem is bordering on narcissistic. :P

[Nescience]

I hit puberty at nine, and stopped growing a few years after then. :cry:

However, this does not make me an 'alpha female' at all. Both my sex drive and my self esteem are pretty much non-existant. Even if I were a sexual, I doubt that I could have anyone that I wanted, partly because my personality repells people, and partly because I'm ugly as sin. Though I don't really find anyone attractive in a sexual way, the people that I do find beautiful (in the same way one may find a flower, a song, or perhaps even a piece of literature beautiful) are people who are very androgenous-looking, be they male or female.

[November Rain]

I think I was 11 when I first started sprouting a little bit of body hair in a couple of certain regions, and when that thing happened to my nipples (y'know, that stage in which they become sore and stiff for a while?), although I don't think it was until about a year or two afterwards when most of the major changes began to take place. So about average basically, maybe slightly early.

[Tangled trees]

I got my first period at age eight. That was before I'd gotten "The Talk", so naturally I decided (very calmly and rationally) that I was dying or something. I don't remember when my family found out or when I realized that I wasn't dying.

Same sort of thing here, and at the same age; only I didn't think I was dying, I just took it in stride like it was nothing. For some reason I'd always associated blood with pain, and having had The Talk very very early (as in when I was about five) had been told periods hurt as well. Since it'd happened in my sleep (and I therefore hadn't noticed I was hurting), well, it was obvious to me that it was completely unrelated to periods, and that it couldn't be blood anyway since no pain was involved. So I went on with my day convinced that it was just my pee changing style and freaked out my teachers when they noticed my bloodied trousers in the afternoon. Cluelessness at its finest, made my mother laugh for days :lol:

It stopped working since then though. All I get are horrible pains and three and a half drops of blood over three days, and nothing I've been given seems to fix it -- makes it worse, actually, by lenghtening my pseudo-periods and making me hurt longer.

No way to know if it would have given me any kind of sex drive, however, since as an SPD I don't and can't have any. It doesn't sound very true to me, though -- most of the very sexual people I know were quite late bloomers.

As for self-esteem, well I really don't know. I don't seem to have any, not as in it being bad, just not there. I simply don't care about appearances or how I'm perceived, and despite all attempts can't be brought to care as I apparently don't notice the occasions on which I should (which is what got doctors to suspect I had SPD in the first place). I don't know whether or not this would qualify as neutral self-esteem.

[OperaGhost]

I had my first period when I was twelve.

[neurofreez]

Late. Really don't think about myself in a positive way unless I have just done the improbable, then I'm just amazed and return to neutral after a day or two. No or low self-esteem/drive.

[LimeTreeArbour]

i think i was a little late; i didnt feel like i was in full flow until 15

[silentdreamer]

I think I was around 15 or 16 when I did. I have low self-esteem and a low sex drive

[Piruvato]

Around 16-15 , low self esteem and very low sex drive, now that I think compared to my friends it was quite late

[square peg]

Very early; my menses began when I was 9, other things even earlier. Hated my body as a result for a long time, I felt like a freak. I've grown into it since though, lol.

Average sex drive with no related attraction. Romantically and platonically I gravitate to almost androgynous people rather than hypermasculine men or hyperfeminine women.

[alittlebirdy]

I was about average. Toward the earlier edge of average, but still not early enough I'd consider it early. I also don't think that it impacted my attraction. I've never thought about it, though.

[deadname]

I hit puberty, as evidenced by the appearance of that damn leg hair that's been the recurrent bane of my existence ever since, sometime during third grade. It's safe to say that's pretty early. But I wouldn't say that it came with either high self-esteem or a high sex drive. For me, self-esteem was usually fairly low growing up, considering the buffeting it took from my classmates. It's much higher now, but only as a direct consequence of significant personal achievements.

As for preferring the opposite sex in a highly feminized form, I have no opinion. I like personalities and conversation above all other factors. The women I know who satisfy those criteria have been a pretty diverse group - some feminine, some more masculine, some androgynous.

On the issue of having my pick of any mate, I've been told I can. But what good is that to me? I'm not looking for anyone, nor do I want that kind of relationship.