sexual who are friends with asexuals

[thethoughtsbetween]

Hey, im new to this site, so i hope i put this in the right place. Being here this short time, I have found that i can now understand how i've felt all these years. never being able to be me for a while was hard to deal with when trying to make friends so i just went through life doing what i thought i should do or better yet what i thought was right for everyone else.

So my question for those of you whom sexual how do you handle your asexual friend coming out to you. did it change how you thought of them. and if you someone you dated in the past who you are friends with now came out as being asexual would that make you question your entire relationship with them?

I ask this because i have a good friend of mine in which we dated years ago. it didnt work out but we never stopped being friends. i mentioned to him that i am a type of asexual. he became very upset with me and said this changed everything. did this happen to any of you, and how did you over come it? he is the closest friend i have and i just cant understand where he is coming from. any advice would be nice i just want to understand it better.

[Guest]

I can see why some would get hurt if you dated them in the past. It is a blow to their self-esteem with how a lot of people view sexual relationships. So, it could just be a shocked/hurt reaction. My friends I came out to mostly were disbelieving. One I had some sort of relation with when I was a kid said I just needed TLC. It is hard for some people to come to terms with.

[jojo2003]

I do not have any friends who came out to me, but when my current partner came with the possibility that she might be asexual, I was at some level relieved that "it wasn't just me". On the other hand, I was sad, because of the trouble we would be going through and the realisation that this incompatibility was not going to change.

And it did not make me question the relationship at all, since our relationship is not just built on sex, but on many other things.

But then again, friends who came out to me as being homosexual has never been an issue either fr me. I know a lot of asexuals get really annoying remarks. But in my opinion the sexual relations and feelings of my friends are their choices and the only thing I want my friends (and ex-partners) to be is happy and if the realisation that they are asexual and the fact that they can be open about it, makes them happy, I am perfectly fine with that.