Christianity, the Bible and Asexuality

[The Great WTF]

There have been a lot of threads discussing this topic and it never ceases to amaze me how many times I hear about religious groups rejecting us. The Mormon sector of my boyfriend's family thinks I'm some kind of Satanist heathen and I recently discovered that the principal of the Christian prep school I attended for most of elementary and middle school has found my Facebook and thus knows I am asexual. Apparently she's spread it to the whole church/school and they're trying to erase all records of my time as a student now because someone who is asexual is apparently flouting God's gift of sexual intimacy between a husband and wife and I am not living as a godly woman by choosing not to marry and have children. I always figured they'd try to erase me eventually, since I was never one for following their "brand" of Christianity and I certainly wasn't quiet about it.

[MindPool]

A christian sect religion I was a part of would have actually been rather supportive of my choice. They always said that it was almost better to choose a life without if you could. Their idea actually went along with 1 Corinthians 7 actually haha. There are some other things about me however that would not have been accepted by them..

And The Great WTF, that seems a bit extreme in all cases. I don't see how being asexual makes you a heathen and why a school would go through such lengths to remove your existence over something like not being interested in sex or the conventional life? To me those sort of things don't go along with the bible says at all and if people actually read it they might know a thing or two. I'm not even religious anymore but I know what the bible says and if they claim to follow it they aren't doing a very good job lol.

[Serrated]

I haven't come out to any Christian folk as ace, just gay, and for the most part the response has been pretty good. The only person who didn't respond well responded reeaallly not well, but we had a chat and everything turned out ok anyhow... I actually just recently came out somebody at my church, and it was great cuz I think I was more worked up over the whole thing than she was. :)

[Erin D]

Dogs,cats birds,ect have sex are they made in Gods image? I don't get their double standards, not all but most. I fell that a lot of what Christians believe open doors to hate, I don't think that was the intention for the things they believe. I think over time it's just what it's become, Double Standards. I hope this is seen as Non-Aggressive talk, I just don't know how to say it any differently. Just be the person that God "made you to be" and forgive them. :cake: :cake: :cake:

[Asexy51]

Don't listen to people who say you're a bad christian or that you can't believe in God because you're asexual or you don't like sex. I think they're telling you that because they want you to change, but no one can satisfy everyone's requirements, so just be who you are.

[CDSM]

For Christians primarily, though other non-aggressive comments are welcome too:

Has anyone been made to feel rejected by a Christian community or leader? Even by a community that supposedly accepts LGBTQ people?

I've been made to feel that I'm a bad Christian because I'm rejecting "God's gift" of sex (horrible choice of gift BTW, God). Also that I'm rejecting an intrinsic part of humanity. Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result. Which doesn't make sense because Jesus never had sex...

Anyway, I don't mean to start a controversy. I just want to know how some people deal with their identity and their Christian faith, and if they feel a need to reconcile or separate the two.

That's ridiculous.

Did they even read the Bible, where Paul never marries and tells others it is good to remain unmarried?

Have they never heard of celibacy and how popular it's been with Christians?

Call them out on their nonsense. The biggest problem about Christians these days is that Christianity is just a part of the general culture they grew up in, and they have absolutely no clue about the religion itself, and any of its tenets outside of what has filtered into their general culture. Especially very few of them know any of the proper commandments given to them in the new testament.

[mackat5]

Those Christians should read Matthew 19:10-12, where Jesus clearly says that there are those who will never get married or have sex. A lot of translations use the word "eunuch" but the meaning is there.

[Flour Confessor]

Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result.

That strikes me as funny. Are they saying God is a sexual being? That God would mate with someone (something)?

[@ce]

That’s crazy.

I’m Catholic and my church have always respected and upheld people’s choice to not get married.

[Kelsea]

Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result. Which doesn't make sense because Jesus never had sex...

So.... the Christian God has sex? (With whom, I'm wondering? )

[The Great WTF]

And The Great WTF, that seems a bit extreme in all cases. I don't see how being asexual makes you a heathen and why a school would go through such lengths to remove your existence over something like not being interested in sex or the conventional life? To me those sort of things don't go along with the bible says at all and if people actually read it they might know a thing or two. I'm not even religious anymore but I know what the bible says and if they claim to follow it they aren't doing a very good job lol.

My asexuality was just the last straw. They already hated me because I asked too many questions and liked Harry Potter and tattoos. I also butchered my 8th graduation ceremony, completely by accident mind you, and mortally offended several major players in the church when I screwed up John 4:16.

[thylacine]

There have been a lot of threads discussing this topic and it never ceases to amaze me how many times I hear about religious groups rejecting us. The Mormon sector of my boyfriend's family thinks I'm some kind of Satanist heathen and I recently discovered that the principal of the Christian prep school I attended for most of elementary and middle school has found my Facebook and thus knows I am asexual. Apparently she's spread it to the whole church/school and they're trying to erase all records of my time as a student now because someone who is asexual is apparently flouting God's gift of sexual intimacy between a husband and wife and I am not living as a godly woman by choosing not to marry and have children. I always figured they'd try to erase me eventually, since I was never one for following their "brand" of Christianity and I certainly wasn't quiet about it.

WTF... satanist heathen... ? Well, if that's the way it is for asexual people, it's nice to know I can be a major intergalactic trouble maker without even doing anything. Let's see... asexual person here, doing the laundry, feeding the cat, shopping for groceries... yeah, that makes me an evil jezebel, I guess. :lol:

No, seriously, this is truly sad.

[Ace McHeeb]

The only Christian I've been "rejected" by is my mom (whom I am unfortunately living with for the time being). She thinks I've rejected all my Christian values and am allowing myself to be influenced by freaks and weirdos. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[Morty]

I've had at least one friend drop me because she believes anything other than heterosexuality "isn't right." When I do bring up my asexuality with people from church, I generally just describe what I'm experiencing instead of using the term "asexual." This has been pretty successful in generating tolerance/acceptance for me.

As far as the church thing goes, I've come to realize that there are doctrinal beliefs and then there are cultural beliefs and policies. A lot of Christians don't realize that these three things are often separate. They've become intertwined in their lives. They don't realize that cultural beliefs are not necessarily part of the doctrine, etc. I keep going to church I do and looking for ways to reconcile because the doctrinal beliefs resonate with me so much, but there are several cultural beliefs that I don't agree with and don't go along with. For me, it's just faith that God knows me and understands what's going on. I tell myself that it's God's approval that matters.

It amazes me how many religious people get blinded by the culture and policies and mistake them for doctrine, while at the same time completely missing the clear doctrinal teachings of how to regard and to treat other people. All we can do is not make the same mistake ourselves. But people fear change and fear losing the sense of community they get from their religion. People react irrationally when they feel threatened.

[MindPool]

And The Great WTF, that seems a bit extreme in all cases. I don't see how being asexual makes you a heathen and why a school would go through such lengths to remove your existence over something like not being interested in sex or the conventional life? To me those sort of things don't go along with the bible says at all and if people actually read it they might know a thing or two. I'm not even religious anymore but I know what the bible says and if they claim to follow it they aren't doing a very good job lol.

My asexuality was just the last straw. They already hated me because I asked too many questions and liked Harry Potter and tattoos. I also butchered my 8th graduation ceremony, completely by accident mind you, and mortally offended several major players in the church when I screwed up John 4:16.

Asked too many questions? So they expected you to follow blindly? Pft I have always hated that. I've been in religions that frowned upon Harry Potter and tattoos as well. And you making a mistake is hardly something to be condemned for. Ah well I'm sure you are far better off and more content outside of their dissaproving clutches.

[The Great WTF]

And The Great WTF, that seems a bit extreme in all cases. I don't see how being asexual makes you a heathen and why a school would go through such lengths to remove your existence over something like not being interested in sex or the conventional life? To me those sort of things don't go along with the bible says at all and if people actually read it they might know a thing or two. I'm not even religious anymore but I know what the bible says and if they claim to follow it they aren't doing a very good job lol.

My asexuality was just the last straw. They already hated me because I asked too many questions and liked Harry Potter and tattoos. I also butchered my 8th graduation ceremony, completely by accident mind you, and mortally offended several major players in the church when I screwed up John 4:16.

Asked too many questions? So they expected you to follow blindly? Pft I have always hated that. I've been in religions that frowned upon Harry Potter and tattoos as well. And you making a mistake is hardly something to be condemned for. Ah well I'm sure you are far better off and more content outside of their dissaproving clutches.

I learned a lot at the school (in some aspects, my history and science education was severely damaged by their.... teaching....) and I can also gloat over the fact that I had top marks in every class for six years running. I think I still hold a few memorization records. It's their loss for hating me, not mine, so I'm perfectly happy.

[@ce]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

[The Great WTF]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Believe it. This was the most narrow-minded bunch of assholes I've ever encountered. They tried to expel me in 4th grade when they found out my parents don't go to church and again in 6th when I punched another boy in the face for telling me that I'm gonna grow up to be a whore at the local brothel if I don't do what God wants and get married. I swear I grew up in the Twilight Zone.

[@ce]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Believe it. This was the most narrow-minded bunch of assholes I've ever encountered. They tried to expel me in 4th grade when they found out my parents don't go to church and again in 6th when I punched another boy in the face for telling me that I'm gonna grow up to be a whore at the local brothel if I don't do what God wants and get married. I swear I grew up in the Twilight Zone.

That is beyond frustrating and demeaning. I wouldn’t have tolerated being in an environment like that. That boy surely earned that punch in the face. I wonder what amount (or lack of) intelligence it takes to be that ignorant and close minded, in a schooling environment. That’s sickening. Plain and simple

[MindPool]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Well my dad was a Jehovah's Witness so I grew up with that on his side. Even got pretty into it myself and became baptized of my own free will. But being gay was frowned upon and I had liked women for as long as I could remember. It's not like I chose it it's just the way I am and I didn't think people should be chastized for that. Originally I had decided I would just live the rest of my life alone because what I wanted was "wrong." Was never interested in sex or anything either so I figured it would be fine. In the end though I left because I thought it was wrong to be looked down at for that. *shrug*

[MindPool]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Believe it. This was the most narrow-minded bunch of assholes I've ever encountered. They tried to expel me in 4th grade when they found out my parents don't go to church and again in 6th when I punched another boy in the face for telling me that I'm gonna grow up to be a whore at the local brothel if I don't do what God wants and get married. I swear I grew up in the Twilight Zone.

I love how you are seen as a heathen for not wanting to be married but the boy could get away with saying things like that... kind of ridiculous if you ask me.

[Almagest]

It's threads like this that make me grateful for my church. My church has a tattoo mural in the lobby because so many people in our congregation have tattoos (including both pastors). We're the sort of church that plays Judas Priest, Metallica, and even Marilyn Manson (that is not an exaggeration--I was there when they played Breaking The Law and Enter Sandman but I unfortunately missed the Marilyn Manson song that they played). We're known as the Church Of Misfit Toys because we let anybody and everybody through our doors. ^_^

[aspiepoet]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Believe it. This was the most narrow-minded bunch of assholes I've ever encountered. They tried to expel me in 4th grade when they found out my parents don't go to church and again in 6th when I punched another boy in the face for telling me that I'm gonna grow up to be a whore at the local brothel if I don't do what God wants and get married. I swear I grew up in the Twilight Zone.

just curious... Pentecostal or Non-Denominational. I have a friend who grew up in a cult...her church's teachings were similar which was a girl's purpose in life was to get married and have kids. Sooo how did you mess up John 3:16 or whatever verse it was? I was very religious till I went on a journey of truth or bust, and found out that the truth may set you free but it will also make you a heretic. Ohh well I guess I am a heretic.

as far as the OP's question, no I never really encountered much problem with outing my asexuality other than people thinking I need to see a therapist.

Jojo

[CDSM]

Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result.

That strikes me as funny. Are they saying God is a sexual being? That God would mate with someone (something)?

the theology I grew up with says we were made in God's *spiritual* image.

As in, the bodies of humans aren't that image.

Sex is supposed just be a method for reproduction, with added bonuses. To some extent, the idea of marriage as being union of man and woman (which sex is naturally part of) serves as a metaphor for the relationship between God/Christ and the Church/Christians, but in a metaphorical/spiritual way. It's just an earthly representation of what's really going on.

So yeah. All just ways that Christians aren't following the examples set forth by Jesus. Now if you'll excuse me, I must go have dinner with some hookers and tax collectors. 8)

[The Great WTF]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Believe it. This was the most narrow-minded bunch of assholes I've ever encountered. They tried to expel me in 4th grade when they found out my parents don't go to church and again in 6th when I punched another boy in the face for telling me that I'm gonna grow up to be a whore at the local brothel if I don't do what God wants and get married. I swear I grew up in the Twilight Zone.

just curious... Pentecostal or Non-Denominational. I have a friend who grew up in a cult...her church's teachings were similar which was a girl's purpose in life was to get married and have kids. Sooo how did you mess up John 3:16 or whatever verse it was? I was very religious till I went on a journey of truth or bust, and found out that the truth may set you free but it will also make you a heretic. Ohh well I guess I am a heretic.

as far as the OP's question, no I never really encountered much problem with outing my asexuality other than people thinking I need to see a therapist.

Jojo

I.... actually don't know. They just called themselves Christian, never said anything beyond that. I accidentally inserted the word seamonkies in the middle of the verse as a byproduct of something my dad said to me before my speech. ("Think of a funny word. It'll keep you smiling and get rid of the jitters.) I didn't realize I'd done it until much later.

[thylacine]

By God (oh the irony), but this is crazy. I can hardly believe how wack-o some the these churches you guys here went to. I’ve always been told to ask questions and that God gave us our free will to make our own choices. If we want to read and enjoy Harry Potter? Great enjoy the book. You want a Tattoo? Great, go get one.

Also The Great WTF, I can’t believe you offended people because you messed up a bible verse, on accident. <_<

What kind of church did you guys go to? The West Bureau Baptist Church? I’ve only been to one church that was even similar to what you guys are describing. They um, damn my mother for letting me at 16 watch PG movies, apparently that makes her a horrible parent. But most churches aren’t like that, at least the Catholic ones I’ve attended.

Believe it. This was the most narrow-minded bunch of assholes I've ever encountered. They tried to expel me in 4th grade when they found out my parents don't go to church and again in 6th when I punched another boy in the face for telling me that I'm gonna grow up to be a whore at the local brothel if I don't do what God wants and get married. I swear I grew up in the Twilight Zone.

Seems like in some (most?) religions, a boy can get away with a lot, but if a girl sticks up for herself, she's in for a lot of trouble. Look at the morning newsaper -- today we not only have the Catholic Church paying out millions to abuse victims, but now they've started a new "McCartyism" thing for the poor nuns. Yeah, that's the solution to the church's problems: scold the nuns.

[asdfjkl;asdfjkl;]

There's nothing in the Bible that says that lack of sexual attraction to other people is a sin. Those Christians were probably reacting to the word "asexual", which they might have lumped in with "homosexual" and "bisexual" (I assume that they weren't accepting of people in the LGBT community either, if they took issue with you being asexual). Paul even said that it's good to remained unmarried. Christians who have a problem with asexuals haven't really read the Bible at all. They probably reacted the way they did because of cultural/societal reasons (someone who doesn't want sex or who isn't sexually attracted to people is usually deemed odd in our society), and that has nothing to do with Christianity. That's their own problem.

[Cazz333]

Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result. Which doesn't make sense because Jesus never had sex...

So.... the Christian God has sex? (With whom, I'm wondering? )

Never really saw God as a sexual being just a loving sensual one. Like Genesis S/He called forth light and called it good, made animals and called it good. And the deep vacuous void was not good as God changed that state to another one. It struck me that God knew good and bad like we know good and bad in life from disliking and liking things, people, concepts and actions to the more extreme instense love, hate and indifference. Maybe for God sex isn't sexual but loving beyond our concepts of romance and sex and asexiness and aromantic.

Then S/He finds the needs to make mankind interrelate with other living things and intrarelate among eachother. I see the Adam and Eve example as one sad abd eventually broken heterosexual relationship. The fact God doesn't concentrate on homosexuality per se but in specific debauched subcases, almost specific homosexual lifestyles- e.g. Sodom and Gamhora- is telling. It feels like God focuses on marriage in a procreative loving way, romantic companionships, single non- sexual and asexual friendships and good other non- personal relationships with colleagues, bosses, parents etc. I think we rehash the same human narrow categories rather than thinking how exactly do the commandments in the Old Testement and Jesus' Great Commandments in the New one make sense in our time, the imperfect Jewish viewpoint features alot in the Bible and later the Greek and Roman predominantly clashes as well with God's viewpoint. The Bible is as much a map of human mistakes, misinterpretations and misunderstandings as much as a written form of God's wisdom.

The only Christian I've been "rejected" by is my mom (whom I am unfortunately living with for the time being). She thinks I've rejected all my Christian values and am allowing myself to be influenced by freaks and weirdos. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Mine believes the same.

[JGR]

Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result. Which doesn't make sense because Jesus never had sex...

So.... the Christian God has sex? (With whom, I'm wondering? )

Never really saw God as a sexual being just a loving sensual one. Like Genesis S/He called forth light and called it good, made animals and called it good. And the deep vacuous void was not good as God changed that state to another one. It struck me that God knew good and bad like we know good and bad in life from disliking and liking things, people, concepts and actions to the more extreme instense love, hate and indifference. Maybe for God sex isn't sexual but loving beyond our concepts of romance and sex and asexiness and aromantic.

Then S/He finds the needs to make mankind interrelate with other living things and intrarelate among eachother. I see the Adam and Eve example as one sad abd eventually broken heterosexual relationship. The fact God doesn't concentrate on homosexuality per se but in specific debauched subcases, almost specific homosexual lifestyles- e.g. Sodom and Gamhora- is telling. It feels like God focuses on marriage in a procreative loving way, romantic companionships, single non- sexual and asexual friendships and good other non- personal relationships with colleagues, bosses, parents etc. I think we rehash the same human narrow categories rather than thinking how exactly do the commandments in the Old Testement and Jesus' Great Commandments in the New one make sense in our time, the imperfect Jewish viewpoint features alot in the Bible and later the Greek and Roman predominantly clashes as well with God's viewpoint. The Bible is as much a map of human mistakes, misinterpretations and misunderstandings as much as a written form of God's wisdom.

The only Christian I've been "rejected" by is my mom (whom I am unfortunately living with for the time being). She thinks I've rejected all my Christian values and am allowing myself to be influenced by freaks and weirdos. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Mine believes the same.

Thanks for the input - very insightful. I'm glad people are still responding to this thread!

Blessings (yes, cake is a blessing, lol)

[Kung Fu Witch]

Christians believe we're made in God's image and we're sexual beings as a result.

That strikes me as funny. Are they saying God is a sexual being? That God would mate with someone (something)?

I always thought that sexuality was something that 'appeared' after Adam and Eve were chased from the garden, since God says something about getting pregnant and giving birth painfully as part of Eve's punishment, and sex seems to be, in the Bible, mainly for child conception.