JagodaDevojka Posted April 27, 2013 Share Posted April 27, 2013 I didn't even know that asexuality was an orientation until this year. I never liked sex. I never really wanted to do anything sexual other than kissing and cuddling. I just turned 40 in December. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tadkitty Posted April 27, 2013 Share Posted April 27, 2013 I didn't even know that asexuality was an orientation until this year. I never liked sex. I never really wanted to do anything sexual other than kissing and cuddling. I just turned 40 in December welcome Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tardis23 Posted April 29, 2013 Share Posted April 29, 2013 I always felt that I was quite sexual when I was a teenager, somewhat when I was in my twenties and then... not really at all after I turned 30. Thirty is not really an age when one's sexuality begins to wane so, at that stage in life, I began to feel quite different and to suspect that I was, in fact, not like everyone else. I've noticed that for the past 15 years, I've only connected to people emotionally. I don't relate to people physically/sexually and *that is my right* as a person, an individual and an Asexual. And I'm happy to know that's where I am. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Becoming Karma Posted May 2, 2013 Share Posted May 2, 2013 I always felt that I was quite sexual when I was a teenager, somewhat when I was in my twenties and then... not really at all after I turned 30. Thirty is not really an age when one's sexuality begins to wane so, at that stage in life, I began to feel quite different and to suspect that I was, in fact, not like everyone else. I agree with Tardis23 to a large extent here, and there was definitely an evolution for me too. In youth there was 'some', and later there was less. Or at least, I used to THINK so. In hindsight, I see that back then there was, in fact, even less attraction than 'some', but I hadn't figured the influence of romantic attraction. I feel that the overlap of romantic attraction was a very large factor to how I saw and felt things. I couldnt understand why my feelings wherent more black and white. Did I like the person or not. Why couldnt I get into the next step of a friendship? Where was my 'drive' when I clearly did like them? Looking back I see that I had a high romantic drive when I was younger, and found many 'pretty' and interesting people attractive for many reasons. The few relationships I tried all failed because of the sexual problems we know well, but we didnt have the internet to educate us back then. Has anyone else found romantic attraction to be a clouding influence in our journey to self understanding? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
knittingpaws Posted May 5, 2013 Share Posted May 5, 2013 I was very excited when I turned 40, until a kidney stone got stuck and sent me to the hospital for a few days with a massive kidney infection. Then there was the colonoscopy a few months later and another emergency room visit. Now my doctor is talking to me about an auto-immune disease. 42 now and feeling that the forty's suck so far... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DirCat Posted May 10, 2013 Share Posted May 10, 2013 I was very excited when I turned 40, until a kidney stone got stuck and sent me to the hospital for a few days with a massive kidney infection. Then there was the colonoscopy a few months later and another emergency room visit. Now my doctor is talking to me about an auto-immune disease. 42 now and feeling that the forty's suck so far... I just got out of the hospital from having my gall bladder removed. Nothing else major yet though... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
JagodaDevojka Posted May 12, 2013 Share Posted May 12, 2013 I think so. I just turned 40 and realized that I was never truly sexual. I hate it, but only did it to make boyfriends happy. It tore me up and made me feel awful. I never knew that this could be a sexual orientation until now. I don't mind kissing and cuddling, but anything involving any kind contact with genitals, I don't like. I would love to meet other 30-40something asexuals to hang out with as friends. It's nice to find people who understand. When I told close friends and my mom that I am asexual, they didn't get nasty at me. They are concerned and think this is a medical issue due to the lupus, fibromyalgia and Meinere's that I have. But I felt this way before I became ill. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
JagodaDevojka Posted May 12, 2013 Share Posted May 12, 2013 I am 44 this week. I feel alienated, mostly. I felt that way in my teens and early 20s, and have started feeling that way again over the last 2-3 years. Hope you have a good birthday Alienated is an interesting word. In what sense of the word do you mean it? In the sense of feeling like what's important to other people isn't important to me, and vice versa. This causes me to be less interested in society, and terse when I do interact. Yeh I'm a bit like that which is probably why I am single I would rather be alone than with someone who annoys me. I enjoy my own company but I do like social interaction as well but as long as its with people I like and in an environment I feel comfortable in. Nightclubs I feel uncomfortable, pubs are more my cup of tea. A barbecue at a friends house or social drinks down the beach rather than a fundraising ball. Rarely do I put myself in a situation I know I wont like anymore but when it's unavoidable like a wedding, I just grin and bear it. I am totally that way as well. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rolling Everforward Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 I am 44 this week. I feel alienated, mostly. I felt that way in my teens and early 20s, and have started feeling that way again over the last 2-3 years. Hope you have a good birthday Alienated is an interesting word. In what sense of the word do you mean it? In the sense of feeling like what's important to other people isn't important to me, and vice versa. This causes me to be less interested in society, and terse when I do interact. Yeh I'm a bit like that which is probably why I am single I would rather be alone than with someone who annoys me. I enjoy my own company but I do like social interaction as well but as long as its with people I like and in an environment I feel comfortable in. Nightclubs I feel uncomfortable, pubs are more my cup of tea. A barbecue at a friends house or social drinks down the beach rather than a fundraising ball. Rarely do I put myself in a situation I know I wont like anymore but when it's unavoidable like a wedding, I just grin and bear it. I am totally that way as well. Nice to hear that I'm not the only one who often feels this way. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Beachwalker Posted June 14, 2013 Share Posted June 14, 2013 How's the naughty forties fairing for everyone? Am officially a newbie to this era. When I remember I am forty it's a slight shock initially followed with well that's life, time keeps ticking along. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted June 16, 2013 Share Posted June 16, 2013 How's the naughty forties fairing for everyone? Am officially a newbie to this era. When I remember I am forty it's a slight shock initially followed with well that's life, time keeps ticking along. Bet you can't imagine how it feels to keep remembering you're in your 60s - we've been around so long we don't even have a nick name...why not?? We still have a 'sensa umor' :D Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lalirra Posted June 21, 2013 Share Posted June 21, 2013 41 here and it seems to be a time for self care so far. It looks and feels like it is time to slow down by my spirit says "NO!" because there is still too much to do. Hopefully, after surgery in 6 weeks, I will have a new leash on life and start feeling my age again, that's a young 41 :) Fortunately I do not have dependents or any solid relationships so i can roam free. However, I do have a calling that involves commitment and responsibility and it is far from complete. I am expecting the 40s to be a time of relaxing into my true self without worrying about how other people see me. I time to let go of any lingering conformities and learning to put me first. When I turned 30 I went to the local public swimming pool and met a lady who had recently turned 40 and we discussed how our values and priorities change as we get older. She reassured me that the 30s might be tough and full of difficult self discovery but the 40s are the reward for all those challenges. She deserves some Forget about silly little things like weight and wrinkles and grey hairs outnumbering your natural colour and enjoy what you have achieved and start calling your opinions and unsolicited advise wisdom because we're getting near the age where we can get away with it ;) (one for each year) [ Edit - Grey is natural too :) ] 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tomee Posted June 27, 2013 Share Posted June 27, 2013 I take it there's not many people in their 40's on this site? The 30's and the 50's section have hundreds of pages, but this section only has 7. Have all the 40's people just given up? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fuzzipueo Posted June 27, 2013 Share Posted June 27, 2013 I take it there's not many people in their 40's on this site? The 30's and the 50's section have hundreds of pages, but this section only has 7. Have all the 40's people just given up? Exciting isn't it? ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mole Posted June 27, 2013 Share Posted June 27, 2013 I take it there's not many people in their 40's on this site? The 30's and the 50's section have hundreds of pages, but this section only has 7. Have all the 40's people just given up? Exciting isn't it? ;) It's just the hardest gig in town. Who knows why? Maybe it'll change if we force it to ? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Beachwalker Posted June 27, 2013 Share Posted June 27, 2013 I take it there's not many people in their 40's on this site? The 30's and the 50's section have hundreds of pages, but this section only has 7. Have all the 40's people just given up? Exciting isn't it? ;) It's just the hardest gig in town. Who knows why?Maybe it'll change if we force it to ? May the forties force be with us! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tomee Posted June 27, 2013 Share Posted June 27, 2013 Exciting isn't it? ;) Oh yeah, the excitement is killing me here..... :D I do find it odd though that the 30's section has over 300 pages, the 50's section has over 100, but the 40's in the middle hardly merits interest with a poor 7 pages. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fuzzipueo Posted June 27, 2013 Share Posted June 27, 2013 We're a busy bunch IRL I think so don't have a lot to say here (at least I am). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mole Posted June 28, 2013 Share Posted June 28, 2013 How about people in their forties either feeling younger or older than they are? Forties is a transition time when we have to stop thinking young (thirties) and accept that we are - erm - not young (fifties). How each person feels guides their choice of thread some go thirties, some go fifties and few go forties. Or maybe we just can't be arsed :P Quote Link to post Share on other sites
A Taste of Harmony Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Here! Not much food photos in this thread. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
That asexual guy Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 47 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Here! Not much food photos in this thread. Reporting this piccy...aaaaagggghhhhhh... I want some!!!!!! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
A Taste of Harmony Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Please don't report me.. :P 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Oooooooppppssss....eaten the evidence :redface: :redface: :redface: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mole Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Tanwen: Step away from the koala, we don't want anything else 'disappearing' do we? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted June 29, 2013 Share Posted June 29, 2013 Awwww....no fair - people always misjudge us dragons. We've stopped eating peasants now, maybe singe the odd one or two if we can find them :lol: !!! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
A Taste of Harmony Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 Oooops! You missed this evidence. I'm looking forward to my 40's. It won't happen too soon but 40's has my 44th birthday! I'm gonna have a good celebration on 44th. Yes! I have soft spot for double number. 4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 Weeellllllllll - now you've pointed them out to me, I can start working my way through them :lol: . I'm gradually learning what I can and can't get away with - chocolate is still very 'iffy' (goes down well enough but doesn't 'sit' too well), but it may improve as time goes on - then beware :lol: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mole Posted June 30, 2013 Share Posted June 30, 2013 Shortbread and tea. Dunk time :) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted July 1, 2013 Share Posted July 1, 2013 I agree with that last post - time for a coffee and a couple of malted milk biccies...best ever dunking biccies... :D 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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