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Unisphere1977

I’m 44 and have only just recognized my sexuality. The signs were all there from puberty on, but even if I’d had knowledge of the asexuality spectrum earlier in life, I don’t think I’d have been ready to acknowledge my sexuality. 
 

Part of my sudden realization has come through therapy, which has been a literal miracle. Recognizing my sexuality and the freedom that comes with that is incredible. Better late than never! It’s so relieving to know that I never have to force myself to have sex again! I’m fine as I am!

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@Unisphere1977 welcome to AVEN 🍰🍰

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Hello.  I totally relate to @Unisphere1977 with "have only just recognized my sexuality".  I also totally related to the signs likely years ago from puberty on.  I just had never heard the ace term until a few years ago.  I never wanted to put any label but nothing else has ever interested me.    Even trying other "labels" online in forums never seems to interest me.

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7 hours ago, Howard said:

@argarWhere did you get that pic of me?

You mean, where did he dig it up? :P 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Today is my 50th! I guess it's time to move to the 50s thread... ;)

 

Enjoy your 40s, everyone! I hope your decade brings you all joy and self-understanding.

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin
53 minutes ago, JaiBee said:

Today is my 50th! I guess it's time to move to the 50s thread... ;)

 

Enjoy your 40s, everyone! I hope your decade brings you all joy and self-understanding.

 

?image=aHR0cHM6Ly9tLm1lZGlhLWFtYXpvbi5jb

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Sleepy Otter

Happy Birthday @JaiBee! I hope you find enjoyment in the 50s forum, but I think you are still welcome here 😊

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On 3/21/2022 at 10:55 PM, portmancp said:

Hi. New on here. I was married for 25 years and have just admitted to myself that I’m asexual. I’ve joined a few dating sites but am finding it so frustrating as no one seems to just want to chat in the UK. Does anyone else experience this or am I resigning myself to not finding any like minded people to get to know? 

Hi 👋 

I’m new too, both on here and on discovering my asexuality. 
I’ve got two failed abusive marriages behind me but I’m finally enjoying being single. I tried dating apps too, looking for companionship before I knew I was asexual, but they are horrible sticky places. Within an hour of chatting I would be asked for nudes, boring!

Ive recently discovered I’m adhd/autistic too so I imagine I’ll be single for a loooong time, but hey ho, at least I like myself for the first time in my 47 years on this planet

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@Hellywelly, welcome to AVEN 🍰🍰

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Packing4Mars

Welcome @Hellywelly lots of people on this thread and others seeing themselves with new eyes, so you don't ever need to feel like you are the only one. I see you live in SW UK. We have a lively meet up for friendships and chat that might be close to you, advertised in the meet-up mart part of the site. Check it out if that interests you. Otherwise, enjoy engaging on here as much or as little as you like.

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  • 2 weeks later...
hudsonvalley76
On 3/8/2022 at 2:10 PM, RobPal said:

I've probably posted something similar before, but it's been a long time since I've been here, so can't remember if I'm repeating myself.

 

Coming up to being 43 and still as lonely as ever, I feel like I'm just falling into the same patterns again.

 

In my 20s, and before I knew I was ace, I had various family and friends drift away as they partnered up and started a family.

 

In my 30s I went to uni as a mature student to make up for lost opportunities due to a chronic illness between ages 11 & 21, so was hanging out with others about 10 years younger. They all drifted away with partners and kids. At 33 I discovered I was asexual.

 

In my 40s I broke down mentally, leading to me finally telling my family and friends that I'm ace. I found a great support group of guys, but they're mostly in their 20s, so I'm already sensing them slowly drifting away for the same exact reasons.

 

The few friends I've held onto are spread far and wide, so I rarely see or speak to them. I work from home, so have no colleagues to see everyday, and I'm an introvert anyway so mostly keep to myself.

 

Although I've done a lot of work on myself and finished having counselling last September, I feel like I'm just treading water and have no prospects for change.

 

I'm not looking for advice, just anyone else who might relate to my situation.

 

Cheers

I relate. I am an introvert. I have few friends and family. I am 45 and touch/sex repulsed, so it gets lonely. I struggle with depression. Most days it feels like I am just treading water. And I don't know what will make me happy. 

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ExquisiteMystery

Me too. Though I have had a permanent illness from age 10. I get how a bunch of minute social stresses/lack of attention from others, can lead to a breakdown.

I wish I could meet some people locally. Statistically there must be a bunch. The few I've met were similarly very young and felt as if they wanted a yes man/woman, instead of an actual interaction. I think the inflexibility of a structured life as adults, hurts our ability to socialize. But I guess the only choice is to keep trying.

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Sleepy Otter

Same, @argar. I told a kid today, “welcome to my generation - walk it off”. It was a minor thing, of course.

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I'm 48 and have only just accepted my asexuality even though I have known what I am for years. I was here at these forums years ago as both Hats and Peyton (usernames), I just couldn't get a handle on who I was back then. I couldn't fathom being alone for the rest of my life in terms of not being with 'someone special.' I'm okay with that now as I have squared that away within myself. Anyhow, it's good to be here.

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59 minutes ago, Justgina said:

Hi I'm Gina.

So happy to find all of you!!!

Hi Gina, welcome and :cake: !

 

(I have a sister named Gina so the name has good associations for me) :D 

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