soulcalibur Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 I thinks that maybe female can be more happy to be asexual. I always listen my brother that said that men can't live without sex. Is true? Can exist men that don't feel sex attraction for a woman and see a woman like a sister? MEN are happy to be alone or they want to remain are alone because they don't find the right person? And if they'll find the right person they would like to became sexual or you want to remain asexual and live your love story in a pure way without sex? Can exist men (nor female) that want remain pure and innocent like me and a modern 'peter pan' and live in a fantasy world without sex? I'm so confused! Link to post Share on other sites
IsaacAsimov Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 i have lived 21 years of my life very happily without sex and my plan is to never have it. i have never felt compelled to pursue it in a relationship, and what i would like to have someday is to find someone else who would be happy without ever having sex and would just like to pal around throughout life. Link to post Share on other sites
pejoratist Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 I think the difference between the male desire for sex and the female is primarily a societal perspective. True, men are biologically designed to have more of a desire to spread their genes when compared with women-and are hence more "horny"- but that school of thought also follows the assumption that men want to impregnate as many women as possible. Obviously, many different kinds of exceptions to this biological rule exist. Link to post Share on other sites
KidKash Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 Yeah, I don't see why not...in my case, I would be unhappy if I attempted to pursue sex. Link to post Share on other sites
Kilraven Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 I'm a 42-year-old male. I've had sex twice in my life: once when I was 26, and once when I was 30. I don't miss it. Link to post Share on other sites
SuperSinger Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 I've had sex. I don't want it anymore and don't miss it. I can definantly do without it. And plan to. Link to post Share on other sites
Chozo Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 You can chalk me up as another "had it, don't want it" I'm 24 so I guess I am at the age when you're supposed to be going "at it" like rabbits. I had sex once when I was 21 though. To be honest, I didn't want it then either, I just wanted to fit in and make my girlfriend happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Shivers Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 Haven't had sex, dont plan on it. For me, it's not a "purity" thing or anything, Ijust find other peoples' genitalia.... disgusting. Link to post Share on other sites
inwards Posted February 20, 2005 Share Posted February 20, 2005 32 years without. I'm curious though, but then on the other hand there are many other more important things to do... Link to post Share on other sites
aussiedecoy Posted February 21, 2005 Share Posted February 21, 2005 We can do it, it is hard at times, but somehow we manage Link to post Share on other sites
anythingtestdead Posted February 21, 2005 Share Posted February 21, 2005 Even though a while back I realized that Im not asexual.......I think a good hug from one of my close female friends would be way better then having sex with them(not that I want to but thats what some people assume....and dont get me wrong, they are all very beautifull and attractive women).... But yes, what made me really question my asexuality in the past was when I fell in love with my best friend......I had so many new feelings that I had never felt for a person before(and yes one of them was sexual....sssshhhhhh dont tell!)...I still love her like nobody else to this day......My love for her is unconditional and undieing.....most likely we will always be just friends and never have sex (us haveing sex or getting together may distroy the great friendship we have now).............. I doubt that Ill ever have sex............although I will be pist if I never get to cuddle again...................... I dont know if there is a right person for me........ As long as I have good friends in my life I think I will be perfectly happy....... Link to post Share on other sites
majesty Posted February 22, 2005 Share Posted February 22, 2005 I prefer to live without sex. I've lived sex free for 5 years now and I couldn't be happier. Link to post Share on other sites
KidKash Posted February 22, 2005 Share Posted February 22, 2005 ^^^While testosterone plays a role, the levels of testosterone can also be manipulated through nurture. In other words, the male sex drive can be decreased and the female sex drive can be increased due to social factors. Basically, the both of you are correct to a certain extent. It is a societal perspective because individual differences and nurture's part are never accounted for, however, testosterone does play a role in the sex drive. Link to post Share on other sites
soulcalibur Posted February 23, 2005 Author Share Posted February 23, 2005 Maybe, there's men with more testosterone respect others... maybe there's men who have sexual desire and men that have not sexual desire... i mean, if there's women with NO SEX's DESIRE, so can exists men WITHOUT sex's desire too. I think that testosterone in not in equal quantity for everyone, And could be that a pure 's men's mind could influence a few testosterone's producton through the brain's impulses ... who know? Male people here maybe can explain this... ? Link to post Share on other sites
Shockwave Posted February 24, 2005 Share Posted February 24, 2005 Soulcalibur, your brother is exaggerating. Any man can live without sex. He will not die without it. A lot of young men use the line "I can't live without sex" to con young women into having sex with them (and the poor things often believe them). Link to post Share on other sites
Shivers Posted February 24, 2005 Share Posted February 24, 2005 Do celibate monks etc. die young? No? That sums it up. Link to post Share on other sites
hilbertastronaut Posted February 24, 2005 Share Posted February 24, 2005 I think that testosterone in not in equal quantity for everyone, And could be that a pure 's men's mind could influence a few testosterone's producton through the brain's impulses ... who know? i feel obligated to caution you from the thought that sex itself is "impure" -- that's how i used to think, and it wasn't a healthy way to come to terms with my own identity and body. In and of itself, sex is another biological activity, no more impure than eating or drinking. What makes sex "pure" or "impure" is the intention behind it and the circumstances surrounding it. You're right in judging that the man who goes into a relationship for the sole purpose of having sex is "impure" -- he treats another human being as a means for his own pleasure. However, when a couple unites for the purpose of creating and raising new life, is that not a miracle? We can see the potential beauty in the act even if we don't intend to carry it out. That's also one way that we as asexuals can gain respect from sexuals: they can honor the sacredness of the act by using it properly, while we can honor it, so highly even that we abstain from it. That might be more applicable to celibates in the strict sense than to asexuals, but it resonates with me at least. Link to post Share on other sites
Deb22 Posted February 24, 2005 Share Posted February 24, 2005 i have lived 21 years of my life very happily without sex and my plan is to never have it. i have never felt compelled to pursue it in a relationship, and what i would like to have someday is to find someone else who would be happy without ever having sex and would just like to pal around throughout life. I totally agree...thats exactly what I want, a life pal that doesnt care about sex but will always be there for me. I have a boyfriend and he is very frustrated with my lack of passion. I'm afraid we arent going to last...but we love each other...I'm confused...anyway, I'm also 21 and have no desire to have sex, before this site I didnt know so many people felt like me. Its nice to know. Link to post Share on other sites
str8fuknpimpin Posted February 25, 2005 Share Posted February 25, 2005 me too. just want a life pal. i'm 24 and am in the same situation as Deb22. Link to post Share on other sites
anythingtestdead Posted February 25, 2005 Share Posted February 25, 2005 I can't live with out green tea. Link to post Share on other sites
Rabger Posted February 27, 2005 Share Posted February 27, 2005 I had the misfortune to hear a very annoying radio talk show this morning that was in relation to this subject. It was a woman talking about and reading letters regarding the "fact" that men can't live without sex. Some of the letters were from women, particularly wives, and men, mostly husbands. The women were pretty upset about the sexual interest of their husbands being directed toward others, even porn. One husband I recall said that wives should be HAPPY about the porn, it kept the attention in fantasy instead of him going after other women. One guy said something along the lines of, "I know she's still recovering from giving birth to our 4 month old, but I have 'needs!'" This is all bullshit, and I think society makes it worse. It makes it sound like, while its not okay if a man cheats, its still understandable if his wife isn't taking care of him sexually. It's HER fault. Now, I know many men have a higher sex drive than women, but all this crap is propoganda. For one, the wording doesn't help. Sexual desire is NOT a "need." A need implies that someone NEEDS it to survive. Air, water, food, and shelter are needs. Sex is not. It is a want. It may have high priorities to some people, but it will not kill them if they don't "get any." The society being that of male rule probably plays a large part in all this crap. If they make the rules, and they want sex, why not tell everyone that men NEED it, so they should be able to get it however they can? I mean our belief system needs a total overhaul so stuff like this is less likely. I mean if little boys are shown that they are SUPPOSED to be sex-obsessed and be womanizers, they are likely to become that. And if little girls are shown that they are SUPPOSED to be sex objects, or if their bfs/husbands cheat on them, its probably their fault, this is all a very bad message! And totally untrue. If men "need" sex, and women "need" emotional closeness and expression, then why is it that often in a relationship, the male "need" is the one more focused on even if they man is emotionally withdrawn? No one NEEDS sex. And all this propoganda is just that. Link to post Share on other sites
Rabger Posted February 27, 2005 Share Posted February 27, 2005 However, when a couple unites for the purpose of creating and raising new life, is that not a miracle? Miracle - 1 : an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs 2 : an extremely outstanding or unusual event, thing, or accomplishment Actually, I'm going to have to disagree with you on that. Creating children and childbirth is not a miracle. I actually think its a very bad thing given our culture. But it sure isn't an unusual or extraordinary event, and I don't see anything outstanding about it either. I do see it as cruel, however. I mean making a woman be ripped apart and then have to wait and and foot on the spawn (because most, though not all, husbands and bfs make the woman do most of the child rearing) is just cruel. Link to post Share on other sites
Deb22 Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Sexual desire is NOT a "need." A need implies that someone NEEDS it to survive. Air, water, food, and shelter are needs. Sex is not. It is a want. It may have high priorities to some people, but it will not kill them if they don't "get any."No one NEEDS sex. And all this propoganda is just that. I have a problem with this. Need something? For what? It may be that one doesn't need sex to exist, but many people need sex to be happy. If your purpose is to exist as long as possible, then you don't need sex. If you want the only life you have to be a happy one, then maybe you do (if you're sexual). After all, you don't need to survive, and therefore not even food and water are needs. you guys are just arguing semantics Link to post Share on other sites
hilbertastronaut Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Actually' date=' I'm going to have to disagree with you on that. Creating children and childbirth is not a miracle. I actually think its a very bad thing given our culture. But it sure isn't an unusual or extraordinary event, and I don't see anything outstanding about it either. I do see it as cruel, however. I mean making a woman be ripped apart and then have to wait and and foot on the spawn (because most, though not all, husbands and bfs make the woman do most of the child rearing) is just cruel.[/quote'] i have to get back to you on this one. i wrote that post when i was in a "yay human beings are good" mood; i hope it wasn't irritating. Link to post Share on other sites
silvergirl Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Actually, I'm going to have to disagree with you on that. Creating children and childbirth is not a miracle. I actually think its a very bad thing given our culture. But it sure isn't an unusual or extraordinary event, and I don't see anything outstanding about it either. I do see it as cruel, however. I mean making a woman be ripped apart and then have to wait and and foot on the spawn (because most, though not all, husbands and bfs make the woman do most of the child rearing) is just cruel. i have to get back to you on this one. i wrote that post when i was in a "yay human beings are good" mood; i hope it wasn't irritating. Sometimes I'm in an 'existence itself is a miracle' mood. But then, sometimes it's hell. Link to post Share on other sites
Peyton Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Ijust find other peoples' genitalia.... disgusting It's funny really because I don't find penises disgusting yet I do find vaginas very unsettling, I say this because it's women I am attracted to not men :? Link to post Share on other sites
Live R Perfect Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 Ijust find other peoples' genitalia.... disgusting It's funny really because I don't find penises disgusting yet I do find vaginas very unsettling, I say this because it's women I am attracted to not men :? I'm the same, Peyton. I guess it's all about what you are used to seeing, and if you are male then this is more likely to be a penis. My first real-life experience of seeing a woman's genitalia was a hell of a shock to me, despite having been exposed to pornographic magazines in my childhood. Link to post Share on other sites
Chozo Posted March 1, 2005 Share Posted March 1, 2005 I can't live with out green tea. It's peppermint tea for me. And coffee. Can't forget coffee *twitches* Link to post Share on other sites
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