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What does it feel like to have a crush?


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Kurai-Tenshi_Niks

It depends on each individual. Personally for me, whenever I get a crush on somebody, my heart might beat a little faster whenever I see or hear that particular individual. I'll find myself feeling really happy and/or giddy, I might find myself feeling somewhat jealous when other people I don't know or are considered exceptionally pretty are talking or laughing with them. I may imagine myself having a meaningful conversation with them, hugging up to them or sometimes kissing them.

As an asexual though, obviously I don't find myself sexually attracted to them, so I don't get aroused or desire to have sex with them whenever I see them, or otherwise.

It's different for all people, I can only tell you how it feels for me to have a crush.

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FrozenCherry

Best feeling in the world. No sexual feeling for me. I do not have an crush on this moment and life sucks <_<

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Nameless123

I tend to feel... "I want to be with that person."

This feeling seems to ignore reason and persists.

Precisely.
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I tend to feel... "I want to be with that person."

This feeling seems to ignore reason and persists.

So being with that person is pleasurable even if you don't do any activity that is particularly interesting to you, or is that more of a need, and you only feel relief when you meet with that person.

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Data, I think if it could be called a "need", it's a heck of a lot more than a crush.

For me, it's just that I'm constantly wondering what they're doing, what they would think or say about something going on. When you see them, even if you just walk past them and say hi, afterwards you're going over it in your head "Oh, god, ok I didn't do anything stupid, that was THEM, that was THEM". Imagining hanging out and (for this particular crush) training together.

Not sexual at all for me, as I'm ace, and I think looks play very little, if any, part in who I crush on. I've only had a few crushes, and none of them have been particularly pretty. It's all personality.

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nightloupe

Hmmm, I seem to be one of those people who just enjoys being fascinated with another. But for the most part, it's either that I tend to crush on people (or focus on them) when I like being around them (since society's view of affection goes like -> crush -> intimacy -> love, in a linear fashion) or when I find that they are very attractive in a physical sense. When I do have a crush on someone I tend to avoid them like the dickens though, I am much too shy to talk to anyone important.

And for those wondering, I have been restructuring my mindset to not think of liking someone to loving someone in a linear fashion, not that that's been going well. My psych teacher brought up the notion when he talked about this scene in some extremely old movie about this young suitor to a man's daughter. The suitor tells the father about his deep love and passion for the daughter (using all of the clichés, of course) and then the father replies saying, that's all good and well but, do you like her? I've been trying to fit that into my schema since I heard. Have not been having a terrible lot of success but I'm trying.

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Blunderbuss

When I see somebody, I can instantly have a crush on them.

I feel like 'Oh, they're beautiful, they're cute, I'd like to take them home and look at them.

And talk with them and have fun with them.'

But please no sexual things. I'm not sure, if I would

even like to have a relatonship or something like that. I just don't want to lose them anymore.

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... being with that person is pleasurable even if you don't do any activity that is particularly interesting to you ...

I feel this if I am around that person.

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When I have a crush it's like I'd like to go up to them and say this....

"Woah. Hi. I'd like to get to know you in any way shape or form, please."

My heart skips beats, I get the butterflies in my stomach, all of the cliches. I stumble on my words. I have insert foot into mouth syndrome. I become nervous and shake-y. But the main thing is that I want to get to know every single thing about them. From little things to big things. Like knowing their middle name to knowing what their family is like.

I am sexual, so I tend to include what I would do to them in the bed if I had a chance, but that's not the main thing on my mind. For me a crush is mainly emotional. You can have an equal amount of physical want to get to know that person but if it's more than the emotional I tend to think it's just having the "hots" for someone rather than a crush.

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Member33070

For me...it goes something like this...I feel these things in this order, it progresses in noticeable stages.

  1. aesthetic attraction - Ooh, that person is pretty in some fashion. Maybe physically. Maybe I like their voice, or hair, or clothes, or personality. I simply admire them like one would admire art, a pretty tree, a building, or something like that.
  2. Squish aka Emotional attraction aka Platonic attraction aka Best-friend-attraction - I develop a deep desire to be really, really good friends with the person, and do lots of things together. This happens with my friends sometimes, although if I know it will never progress beyond the "squish" stage I don't call it a squish. If I feel slightly more intense about the situation or think it might turn into a crush, I call it a squish until it's actually a crush.
  3. Crush aka Romantic attraction - I develop a much stronger squish on the person and desire romantic things with them, such as hugs, cuddles, petting their hair, laying on their lap or shoulder, etc. It may progress to a more intense crush where I want kissing and other things, but this has only happened once. I think I may be demiromantic for this reason - I only desire more intense romance if I have a deep relationship with the person already.

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Asexy Existentialist

It feels smushy. It feels like you want to be around them all the time. Maybe you remember things about them better and maybe you appreciate all the little things about them and maybe their faults become more tolerable. But mostly, it feels special. They feel special. And also the smushy.

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What does it exactly feel like to have a crush on a person? Is it a sexual attraction, emotional or both?

I wouldn't know, but reading the replies here have guided me to create a visualisation of a "crush". How is a crush defined anyway, or is it defined in the first place?

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kelseygurl

For me...it goes something like this...I feel these things in this order, it progresses in noticeable stages.

  1. aesthetic attraction - Ooh, that person is pretty in some fashion. Maybe physically. Maybe I like their voice, or hair, or clothes, or personality. I simply admire them like one would admire art, a pretty tree, a building, or something like that.
  2. Squish aka Emotional attraction aka Platonic attraction aka Best-friend-attraction - I develop a deep desire to be really, really good friends with the person, and do lots of things together. This happens with my friends sometimes, although if I know it will never progress beyond the "squish" stage I don't call it a squish. If I feel slightly more intense about the situation or think it might turn into a crush, I call it a squish until it's actually a crush.
  3. Crush aka Romantic attraction - I develop a much stronger squish on the person and desire romantic things with them, such as hugs, cuddles, petting their hair, laying on their lap or shoulder, etc. It may progress to a more intense crush where I want kissing and other things, but this has only happened once. I think I may be demiromantic for this reason - I only desire more intense romance if I have a deep relationship with the person already.

I'm aromantic and I've never had an actual romantic "crush," just squishes. This is pretty much what I think of when people ask about the difference between "crush" and "squish." This is pretty much what I think of when people ask about the difference between "crush" and "squish." Except I believe the difference between potential friendship and a "squish" is that you are unhealthily infatuated with that person. You feel extremely anxious around them, obsess over every little thing they do, and want to impress them badly. Squishes defy all sanity. You can have a squish on someone who's your friend, but you won't necassarily have one on every single friend you make.

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HMTQ - Madge

Well... a crush can be difficult to explain. For me, as a heteromantic asexual, it's like all I want to do is be near that person. When I'm not with them, I wish I could see them or hear their voice again, even just for a little bit. Being around them makes me extremely giddy and happy, which eventually delves into a pleasant contentedness. It's simply great just being able to be in their presence. :lol: I'll think about the usually hugging, cuddling, kissing, etc. too, but most of the time I'm happy just being around them. That's how a crush is for me, anyway.

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

Crushes! :wub: nom nom on crushes :wub: because they are delicious -when you have them back-! :wub: :wub: I want to have one now, I'm so crushddicted :( I'm runing out of crushes :( I'm hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

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FrozenCherry

Crushes! :wub: nom nom on crushes :wub: because they are delicious -when you have them back-! :wub: :wub: I want to have one now, I'm so crushddicted :( I'm runing out of crushes :( I'm hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

:lol: Me too :wub::cake:

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

Crushes! :wub: nom nom on crushes :wub: because they are delicious -when you have them back-! :wub: :wub: I want to have one now, I'm so crushddicted :( I'm runing out of crushes :( I'm hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

:lol: Me too :wub::cake:

Squish on cherry pie! I hope you looks like this:

431017_f496.jpg

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Crushes! :wub: nom nom on crushes :wub: because they are delicious -when you have them back-! :wub: :wub: I want to have one now, I'm so crushddicted :( I'm runing out of crushes :( I'm hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

:lol: Me too :wub::cake:

Squish on cherry pie! I hope you looks like this:

431017_f496.jpg

What exactly is a squish?

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

Crushes! :wub: nom nom on crushes :wub: because they are delicious -when you have them back-! :wub: :wub: I want to have one now, I'm so crushddicted :( I'm runing out of crushes :( I'm hungryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

:lol: Me too :wub::cake:

Squish on cherry pie! I hope you looks like this:

431017_f496.jpg

What exactly is a squish?

Crushes and Squishes

A crush is a romantic attraction to someone, a desire for a romantic relationship of some kind, a desire that is possibly temporary in nature, possibly never to be acted upon. A squish is an aromantic crush, a desire for a platonic relationship with someone. (Website)

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Ahhh, okay! That makes sense. Thank you. <3

So squishes aren't just for asexuals then? For a second I thought they were since it was the first time I heard the term.

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

Ahhh, okay! That makes sense. Thank you. <3

So squishes aren't just for asexuals then? For a second I thought they were since it was the first time I heard the term.

I think everybody can have a squish, but really I dont know. If you see the link its related to Aven, tho, It sounds like something we all could feel.

By the way there are other threads about Squishes on Aven :) so maybe there you can find more info about this subject.

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Got it. I'll have to search for them. -nod-

But for now I'm just going to stalk this part of the forum. :D

Thank you~

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

Got it. I'll have to search for them. -nod-

But for now I'm just going to stalk this part of the forum. :D

Thank you~

;) I'll let you know if I learn more about it, I will share it :)

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

I can't seem to find the other topics about squishes. DX

Write squish on the search bar and be sure you are looking into forums. Then you will get all the thread related to the subject. Well my english isnt the best, i try to explaing, hope it works, tell me if didnt.

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FrozenCherry

I can't seem to find the other topics about squishes. DX

Press that little icon which looks like a flower or what ever, it gives better options to make a specific search.

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FrozenCherry

Squish on cherry pie! I hope you looks like this:

431017_f496.jpg

:lol:

I looks like much more delicious than that :P

(no. I am very ugly :( )

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

Squish on cherry pie! I hope you looks like this:

431017_f496.jpg

:lol:

I looks like much more delicious than that :P

(no. I am very ugly :( )

Not in my mind :) so, i dont agree! ;) beauty people is fun and nice :D

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