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MollyJane

So something that I noticed a while back was that while my friends had sex dreams... I never have. Not that i remember anyway :P

I just wonder if other aces have found this to be true, or if this is just me.

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I can't say I've ever had one, either...at least not one that I remember :rolleyes:

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I have had a sex dream once that involved me ummm... having sex with a dog I knew, :redface: but I got no pleasure from the dream.

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NEETfreak

(I'm not necessarily ace, but I'll reply anyway)

I've had a few; but none of them were realistic. I'm never "me" in my dreams, be they a typical dream or the sexual kind. By that I mean.. I never have my real face or body. My appearance is never consistent in my dreams, either.

What really strikes me as odd in my sexual dreams is the fact that I do things I'd never do in real life.

For example I'll use one of my more recent (and quite possibly the strangest sexual themed dream I've ever had): In this dream I was a man in a business suit, working on his laptop.. But for some odd reason, I was in a hot spring. IN A SUIT!

Anyway, I'm eventually approached by another guy who gets in the hot spring with me (Whom, unlike "me" had enough brains to take his clothes off), and that's where it starts to get sexual. Things got even weirder when another guy got involved, turning it into a threesome. :blink:

Problems with that dream were: 1) I wouldn't have sex with someone I've only just met. 2) I'd never have a threesome. And 3) WHO THE HECK GETS IN A HOT SPRING WHILE WEARING A SUIT!?

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None that I remember ... but I do have wet dreams.

I am wondering now how can one have wet dreams which do not involve feeling aroused... but I do get them.

Does this make sense to anyone else ?

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I have had sex dreams (rarely) and wake up like "wtf??". I think it has to do with the brain processing stuff, like how if you watch a film before bed you can dream elements of that film. Since asexuality is a part of one's identity, you may have a subconscious running theme in your brain that manifests itself from time to time. I'm a vegan who sometimes worries about slipping up, and I do have the occasional dream where I find myself eating yoghurt or finishing off someone's milky tea (hell, I don't even drink tea!)

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MollyJane

all helpful (and entertaining)! thanks you guys :) i was just going to bed last night and it popped into my head. I do this often. :P

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There were three instances where I came close to having sex dreams.

1) I was randomly driving in a car with several friends in an industrial setting. Out of nowhere, random girls start popping up on the buildings. I orgasm, feel unbelievably embarrassed in the dream car, wake up, and feel embarrassed in the same way.

2) The dream starts off with me apparently killing some kids by encasing them in cellophane wrap, I really don't know. Then these random females appear sun-tanning on the nearby driveway, I somehow end up rubbing lotion on them, orgasm, wake up, feel similarly humiliated and zone out for the entire day confused over the dream.

3) In some random room, and I somehow end up humping a random pile of sheets that I'm pretty sure wasn't a girl. I stand up, run out of the room, feel confused, and wake up without the same embarrassment as the other two dreams. I feel really, really confused, but thankful there's no "mess" this time around.

I think all of these were the results of me putting off masturbating. So whenever I forget to for too long a time, I always get scared. These dreams have always puzzled me more than anything while I was having them.

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trianglekitty

New member here- picking an rather odd post to get my feet wet with (so to speak). Dreaming has always intrigued me, and "sex dreams" are something I do experience fairly frequently.

However, I only have such dreams when I am suffering from sleep paralysis. In sleep paralysis you get "stuck" between sleeping and waking. You're awake, but you can't move, may feel a sense of vibration or pressure, and may experience vivid hallucinations. For people who can relax into this state, sleep paralysis can result in lucid dreaming. For people like me who can't relax into it, it pretty much feels like you're about to die.

Often when I get stuck in sleep paralysis I will have vivid sex dreams. I do feel something in these dreams, but it never reaches...well, let's just say it goes nowhere. My dreams in this state are very repetitive, so I'll go through the same scenario dozens of times. The entire time I'll be aware that I'm "stuck" and will struggle to break the cycle (you have to focus very very hard on moving one body part like your head or hand.)

I'm never myself in these dreams (and I'm almost always a man), but my partners are usually people I know. Oddly, I sometimes have flying dreams in this state, and just as the sex dreams go nowhere, I can never actually fly- I can only glide short distances. Sometimes I wonder what that says about my subconscious!

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MollyJane

New member here- picking an rather odd post to get my feet wet with (so to speak). Dreaming has always intrigued me, and "sex dreams" are something I do experience fairly frequently.

However, I only have such dreams when I am suffering from sleep paralysis. In sleep paralysis you get "stuck" between sleeping and waking. You're awake, but you can't move, may feel a sense of vibration or pressure, and may experience vivid hallucinations. For people who can relax into this state, sleep paralysis can result in lucid dreaming. For people like me who can't relax into it, it pretty much feels like you're about to die.

Often when I get stuck in sleep paralysis I will have vivid sex dreams. I do feel something in these dreams, but it never reaches...well, let's just say it goes nowhere. My dreams in this state are very repetitive, so I'll go through the same scenario dozens of times. The entire time I'll be aware that I'm "stuck" and will struggle to break the cycle (you have to focus very very hard on moving one body part like your head or hand.)

I'm never myself in these dreams (and I'm almost always a man), but my partners are usually people I know. Oddly, I sometimes have flying dreams in this state, and just as the sex dreams go nowhere, I can never actually fly- I can only glide short distances. Sometimes I wonder what that says about my subconscious!

dude that is some heavy shit... im totally fascinated though... is that messed up?

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None that I remember ... but I do have wet dreams.

I am wondering now how can one have wet dreams which do not involve feeling aroused... but I do get them.

Does this make sense to anyone else ?

I don't think wet dreams have to be connected with feeling aroused at all. I think they're mostly a mechanical process which don't have to be connected to erotic dreams. With the few that I've had, I don't remember feeling aroused. In fact, I remember feeling very unaroused, which made the experience very strange. Not even the slightest hint of pleasure, just muscle spasms.

As for my own experience, ss I posted in another thread recently, most of my sex dreams involve me not having sex. They'll involve anything from light flirting to naked and willing women trying to get me into bed. In my dreams, I either don't notice what's going on or don't care because I have more important things to do. In any case, if I remember them when I wake up, I usually find them hilariously ace.

Much more frequently, my sex dreams will involve masturbation, usually while in some strangely designed bathroom (Usually, it's missing one or more walls) that has odd furniture (Recently, there was a bunk bed with polka dot sheets over a bathtub), and with a time limit, like an appointment I need to get to or someone waiting outside the door. Those are just weird.

I only have one or two a year of either type, though.

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I have sex dreams sometimes. It doesn´t bother or shock me, because I have sex fantasies too, so it isn´t anything what I would rather not to experience. It´s nice and safe. ^_^

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It's strange that there's apparently no connection between asexuality and sex-themed dreams, is it not?

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It's strange that there's apparently no connection between asexuality and sex-themed dreams, is it not?

I don´t think it is so strange. People have dreams about almost everything. You can have a dream in which you were killed by aliens. Or you can have a dream in which you had sex. Both is very improbable. :lol:

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MollyJane

i was thinking similar things. I seriously doubt sex dreams are linked to ace, but am so curious as to your answers! It's honestly just bizarre to me that so many of you remember your dreams in such detail! :P

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never odd or even

It's strange that there's apparently no connection between asexuality and sex-themed dreams, is it not?

I don´t think it is so strange. People have dreams about almost everything. You can have a dream in which you were killed by aliens. Or you can have a dream in which you had sex. Both is very improbable. :lol:

i one had a dream that i was a time travelling serial killer transman :lol: and the only reason i didnt get caught was because they were tracking a man not a woman :lol:

and then i had a dream about having sex with the cabbage man who happened to be a greenish looking fat guy that smelt like cabbages :lol:

thing is that i actually remember my dreams.... its really quite funny remembering them! and quite embarrassing and disturbing too, hence me not divulging them all :ph34r:

yeah, with my dreams, its like i watch them in both third and first person, alternating between the two. sometimes i'm me, sometimes i'm someone else and sometimes i'm just a presence/narrator type thing.... what does THAT say about my subconscious :blink:

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I didn't have a sex dream, but it isn't really strange for asexual to have one imo. Dreams are often pretty random.

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well... interesting topic..

I think dreaming is one of the most amazing things ever because anything goes.

I remember a lot of my dreams, but people have tons of dreams every night.. you just cant recall many of them.

I can remember having one sex dream ever. it was probably 6months ago.its just a dream. mine are random as can be.

most of the time they are somehow related to something going on, but they still dont mean much..

I bet everyone does but they dont remember..

I remembered because i was quite confused afterwards.

ehh yeah..

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I've had dreams of being killed by hatchet men, kidnapped by aliens, riding dragons, morphing into animals, making things levitate, visiting Wonderland, witnessing and blocking the apocalypse, and other things I can't remember right now.

But I've never dreamt of having sex :cake:

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It's strange that there's apparently no connection between asexuality and sex-themed dreams, is it not?

I don´t think it is so strange. People have dreams about almost everything. You can have a dream in which you were killed by aliens. Or you can have a dream in which you had sex. Both is very improbable. :lol:

Yeah. I've heard people say, "if you dream about sex, you want sex" but I think that's silly. I have dreams where I've died, but that doesn't mean I want to die.

I've had sex dreams (and romance dreams). I find them really interesting, because I'm unlikely to be having sex or a romantic relationship IRL. It's like a virtual reality experience. :P I'm not into Freudian dream interpretations, because I feel like different things have personal meanings to different people. In dreams where I've experienced romantic attraction, I remember being happy because I was thinking, I'm fitting in. "Fitting in" is an ongoing mental conflict for me, and I think sex and romance are metaphors for this.

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I've had sex dreams in which I alternate between first and third person veiw point.

I've been put in many awkward positions like a near threesom that I did not initiate.

I also vaguely recall randomly being back in my old middle school and then leaving it via an impossibly long road with oak trees wearing their fall suits lining the sides. I knew I was off to have lesbian sex with my friend Makayla.

IRL I've never desired sex. I have no romantic interest in girls and most guys. Also, sex is sex no matter who it involves. I have never in my life thought of it as" gay sex" or" lesbian sex."

That said, I also have dreamt that I was hanging on to the swim platform of my mothers Mastercraft(a boat) while it is running. (You're really not supposed to do that.) During my stint clinging frantically to slants in the swim platform where my fingers barely fit, my father was throwing knifes at me. I recognised every knife he threw from our kitchen. It was a weirddd dream.

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Moon Thief

I've never really had a sex dream before, and the closest one I've gotten to one is being in the bath tub with one of my close friends. Even in the dream I felt repulsed by the situation.

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Ninjapandaperson

In my dreams, I either don't notice what's going on or don't care because I have more important things to do. In any case, if I remember them when I wake up, I usually find them hilariously ace.

Mine are like that too.

They never really go to orgasm, just me being aroused while things happen…

In one, I was masturbating with jello…and then someone caught me and demanded I give them the jello…

I had one where I was investigating the disappearance of my friend, who (unbeknownst to me) had been possessed by a jar of river water. I was asking around in a bar, and this lady comes up to me and starts a conversation. At some point she asks what I do for a living, and I tell her I'm a narrator. She asks me to narrate while we have sex…and we are having sex, but then I get writer's block and leave. Then I'm in the bar again, and everyone's gone…never mind, I'm getting off-topic.

In another, I am in a war, or something, and begin killing the opposing warriors while they sleep. And then I start raping one, which wakes him up…Yeah. Strangely enough, I'm the only woman in the battlefield.

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Wineblood

I've had maybe half a dozen sex dreams in my life. They usually involve nudity and all the stuff leading up to sex but, being a virgin, my brain doesn't know what dream sex should be like and I end up waking up before anything really happens. It's a bit weird to have because they're so spread apart and random.

Wet dreams, on the other hand, I have never had.

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  • 1 month later...
guitar sunshine

i've never had a sex dream either. i waas talking with a friend the other week when the subject popped up, and we both knew it wasn't norm but kinda laughed it off

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Kurai-Tenshi_Niks

I sometimes have sex dreams..but there's never any uh... penetration...the person is usually a male and they're faceless.

In the dream I have no real bond or desire with the person..it's just a purely physical thing. I hate them.

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I used to have have some sexual dreams and nocturnal emissions but they're a real bother so I just take care of it in the evening. Haven't had one since I started doing that.

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Member33070

I've had several. Usually it's where I'm horny or aroused and desperately looking for a willing...candidate? :wacko: These candidates vary, from manifesting a character from a romance novel I invent on the spot (lucid dreaming woo!) or some random dream character. Sometimes instead of a person I'll be desperately searching for something to masturbate with - usually electric toothbrushes or the not-razor end of an electric razor. Odd since I'm a repulsed asexual with no libido and never have felt these feelings in real life. Don't masturbate, either - never have, don't plan to.

(psychologists have a field day with that one and sticking the "repression" label on it, but I'm being completely honest)

I also had a dream once that I was in court accused of torturing someone by castrating them. :mellow: And in the dream I was like...not in the courtroom because I would apparently go crazy if I was and start hurting everyone, so they put me in the little locked room and I was making myself some macaroni and cheese on a mini stove, completely ignoring the trial, showing no emotion at all to it except occasional giggles. I've actually had several dreams where I was a serial killer, torturer, evil witch, etc. I'm definitely not myself in my dreams.

Also,

i one had a dream that i was a time travelling serial killer transman :lol: and the only reason i didnt get caught was because they were tracking a man not a woman :lol:

Made. My. Day. :lol: :lol: :lol:

and

i was thinking similar things. I seriously doubt sex dreams are linked to ace, but am so curious as to your answers! It's honestly just bizarre to me that so many of you remember your dreams in such detail! :P

I actually trained myself to do that for years by keeping an insanely detailed dream journal, with each dream taking up at least 4 pages of 8.5x11 paper...diagrams, pictures, etc. included. It's a big step in learning to lucid dream - learning how your dreams work. That macaroni and cheese dream happened like 6 years ago and I never wrote it down. I could go into more ridiculous detail...down to the clothes I was wearing and the layout of rooms and how exactly I made the macaroni and cheese, which is ridiculous. One huge benefit of this training is that I have amazing memory in all aspects of my life now. It's important to be able to distinguish between waking and dreaming life.

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