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Worst way you've been hit on ?


Queen-Of-Spiders

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Asexy Existentialist

I have a suggestion and please don't get offended by it. I too am one of those women who get hit on, though it hasn't happened as frequently now that I've had a breast reduction and gained quite a few pounds. There must be some kind of signals that we are unconsciously sending off that other women (who don't get hit on) don't. I'm not saying blame the victim. I'm saying these guys are picking up on something. I only wish I knew what that was, so I could do something about it.

When it comes to crime, there are numerous books and seminars on how not to be a crime victim, how not to give off signals to criminals. I would like to see the same thing as far as women who are being hit on. Is there some man who could tell us what it is that these creeps look for, so that we can avoid it (short of wearing full burka). I for one would be very interested in attending such a class!

To me this sounds dangerously close to the "she was asking for it" rape culture BS that keeps women "in their place" in modern society. I shouldn't have to be afraid to wear a short skirt, or walk down my street after hours, or wear what makes me feel good (even if that means showing a little cleavage) on the bus. Instead of telling the women they should be more passive and not exercise their full human rights, maybe we should go after the perverts, the abusers, the rapists instead.

Ugh, this reminds me of our church's Lent study for teenagers on 'The Truth about Sex.' Not only did it assume that everyone was sexual, it had this one super annoying segment where girls were cautioned not to wear clothing that might tempt guys. Afterwards we had to discuss it, and I said something along the lines of "If it's summertime and I wear a somewhat low-cut tank top and shorts to stay cool, and a guy with a girlfriend is staring at me, that's definitely his fault. How is it my fault because of what I'm wearing? Shouldn't it be his responsibility to not offend his girlfriend by staring at other girls?" That seemed to confuse our instructors because all they could tell me was "You shouldn't tempt guys," as if guys are completely innocent and WE HORRIBLE GIRLS ARE JUST TEMPTING THEM OMG LOCK THEM ALL UP.

You know, I'd never heard this view in my church, but apparently it's popular in a lot of other churches. That women are responsible for the temptation and men are just helpless. That's disgusting. It's a view perpetuated by our society, that men are animals and helpless to their libido and "visual creatures" and just... barf. I get that going out in your skimpy bikini top or shorts that show "butt cleavage" is a bit much, but if I want to wear spaghetti straps, men could put forth a little moral effort. Jeez.

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I've been hit on a few times, but I don't get out much, which I'm pretty thankful for.

I remember once I was in high school (or maybe earlier) and I was walking to the store and some creepy guys cat called me. It made me feel really scared and insecure and skeeved out. :(

And I'm not sure if you'd call the next incidents as me being hit on, but I'll share anyway.

I was at this one party in college and I hadn't had much to drink, but I'm such a lightweight that it doesn't matter anyway. As with everyone else, my judgement becomes VERY clouded, but at least I know what's going on and I can stop anything from progressing too far. Anyway, there was this one guy there and I forget what we were talking about (all I remember was me being worried about where my camera was) and we started kissing. Actually, no, I don't think these would be "hit-ons" but the third guy who kissed me that evening (God, I'm such a slut :P ) was the creepiest.

We talked online a whole bunch and I don't know what the hell was wrong with me, but for some odd unexplainable reason I liked him, and he continually hit on me online and kept telling me I was hot and had great "T&A" (which I had to look up because I had NO idea what that meant :( ). And after a while, he told me he wanted to be friends with benefits, so I stopped talking to him immediately. I actually got quite angry with him for suggesting such a thing. That was my first and only sexual offer. :\

Another guy who I guess you could say hit on me was another creeper. Again, I don't know what possessed me, but I liked this guy, too. I was kind of forced to go out on a date with him, and I sort of told him that I wasn't really interested in a boyfriend, but I also kind of told him that it wasn't a definitive answer. So he kept touching me (not *really* inappropriately, more like arms and legs) and it just really skeeved me out.

Oh. And WAY before all of that, there was another creeper. We had talked quite a bit during college, and once online, he started hitting on me and he kind of prodded me into exchanging pictures with him. I didn't send him anything naughty. The worst I sent him was a picture of me in a bikini top, which a lot of people on the beach saw anyway, so that didn't really matter. And then he sent me a picture of his dick. So I sent him a picture of a random guy in briefs.

I don't talk to any of them anymore. And now I hardly get hit on, which is pretty nice. I tend to put a hard, stern look on my face, which tells people to back off. My mom doesn't like it when I do it because it makes me look cold, but I'd rather look like that than be open prey. :(

My parents also want me to join a gym so I can "meet new people." Ugh. No thanks.

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Asexy Existentialist

My parents also want me to join a gym so I can "meet new people." Ugh. No thanks.

You know, I haven't been hit on at the gym. Maybe it's because I get super sweaty and I don't wear the slutty gym clothes some women wear, but I digress. I have met some cool new people at the gym, by the way of friends. So even if your parents meant it as meeting date-able people, you could meet some new people who turn out to be totally awesome in a platonic way. I'm actually at home for the summer and I miss my gym friends already!

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Changed773

Wow...I haven't read all the stories on this thread but most of these stories go far beyond "getting hit on." This is full on harassment and assault! :blink:

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mylittlehazmat

I hate how unsafe it makes you feel. I was at work, and this one guy, probably about 45+ kept asking me for my number, if I would come over to his house so he could make me tea, and like, I hid in the back of the store for an hour after I FINALLY got him to leave. Oh. My. God. It's such a violation, and I don't even know why it bothers me so much, perhaps that they're thinking sexually about me at all, but no. Just. Ugh. It legitimately scares me sometimes.

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Wineblood

Thankfully I've never had that at all (or it just flew over my head :P). I suppose it might have to do with the fact that I'm a guy and I've been overweight since my late teens. I'm afraid this kind of behaviour will fly my way once that goes though, that creeps me out a little.

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Worst one was definitely high school. There was this guy who sat next to me in one of my classes. It started with him continually asking to copy off my homework. Which annoyed me because I worked really hard in class. It continued with him asking to borrow or touch my pens or pencils when he had his own. I just gave him utterly confused looks and told him no. Then one day his buddy next to him told me that he liked me. My face: o.o I think I said, "Uhhhh . . . okay?" Which is obviously obviously code for "Secretly, I want you very badly."

Not.

He kept bugging me, asking me to borrow my stuff and complimenting me minutes before insulting me. (I still don't know what he was trying to do there). Then one day he asked to touch my stuff and was not referring to my pens or pencils. No, no you can't.

I got a facebook friend request from him the other day. I just laughed and laughed. Then I hit ignore. :D

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I think the problem is that the "asking for it" thing is just too common. And happens after the fact. If someone gets mugged, you don't hear people go "well, he was wearing a suit, obviously he's rich, he should have worn a sweat shirt if he didn't want to get mugged". Yet you hear these things about rape.

The other thing is that in case of robbery, the people want to take your stuff, so it's a good idea to hide your stuff or protect it. But in the case of rape, it's not seeing you dressed provocatively that makes a person want to rape you. They've analysed it and it's about power and not about sex, sex is the weapon, not the end goal. So it's not "they got so turned on they couldn't resist". In the end it's not about the way you dress. Suggesting it is is annoying because it shifts the problem.

Other forms of advice, such as learning self defense and stuff, are good. But that advice isn't specific to sexual assault, it works for being mugged as well for instance.

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I think the problem is that the "asking for it" thing is just too common. And happens after the fact. If someone gets mugged, you don't hear people go "well, he was wearing a suit, obviously he's rich, he should have worn a sweat shirt if he didn't want to get mugged". Yet you hear these things about rape.

The other thing is that in case of robbery, the people want to take your stuff, so it's a good idea to hide your stuff or protect it. But in the case of rape, it's not seeing you dressed provocatively that makes a person want to rape you. They've analysed it and it's about power and not about sex, sex is the weapon, not the end goal. So it's not "they got so turned on they couldn't resist". In the end it's not about the way you dress. Suggesting it is is annoying because it shifts the problem.

Other forms of advice, such as learning self defense and stuff, are good. But that advice isn't specific to sexual assault, it works for being mugged as well for instance.

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I don't see how the whole "blame the victim" thing makes sense in rape. It doesn't matter what someone was wearing or where they were; if they said "no", they said "no".

Aaaanyway, getting back to the theme of the thread: this probably doesn't count, but the only times people "hit on" me in school was to mess with me because I was easily embarassed, and they seemed to like making that happen in front of people (hence "hit on" being in quotation marks).

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Trolley Girl

The worst time for me of which I can think was when I was working as a busboy at a locally-owned restaurant. I was delivering a case of beer to one of the bars when some weirdo dude looked at me, and said, "Here it comes!" - and then he grabbed me by the ass with both of his hands.

My general manager found out about it shortly afterwards, and after yelling at the guy for a good 5 minutes, barred him. He even threatened to call the police if he ever saw that creep's face in there again.

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I've always wondered, in a "ooh ooh look at the trainwreck!" kind of way why people act like that. I think it's just an extension of the abovementioned rape-as-power motivation, it's all about proving they can do it and get away with it, because I'm willing to bet my bottom dollar that deep down inside they honestly KNOW that nobody likes getting their ass grabbed in public by strangers.

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Trolley Girl

it's all about proving they can do it and get away with it, because I'm willing to bet my bottom dollar that deep down inside they honestly KNOW that nobody likes getting their ass grabbed in public by strangers.

But then again, they won't be thinking that way anymore when their luck runs out, and the police catch them and put them in jail.

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Ase of Spades

My general manager found out about it shortly afterwards, and after yelling at the guy for a good 5 minutes, barred him. He even threatened to call the police if he ever saw that creep's face in there again.

Your manager is awesome. :lol: If I'd been there and saw what happened I would be seriously tempted to shake his hand.

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The worst way I've been 'hit on' was when I was walking back home from uni once, taking a short-cut across a field. A drunk, filthy tramp walked up to me and started speaking Polish really loudly. I told him that I didn't understand what he was saying, and that if he wanted to be in our country, he needed to speak our language (I have nothing against immigrants, by the way - I just think that if you're going to move to a foreign country you should learn to speak the language).

ANYWAY, his talking just got louder and louder, and then he started pointing downwards. At which point I instinctively glanced downwards, only to see that his cock and balls were, indeed, hanging out of his trousers. I screamed and started to run, but he grabbed me by the arm, still shouting Polish at me and pointing at his cock. Eventually I managed to yank out of his grip, and ran home faster than I even thought possible. Nowadays I take the long route home. :(

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Ase of Spades

Oh my God!! That's terible! D: :cake: You're lucky you were able to get away from him.

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Oh my God!! That's terible! D: :cake: You're lucky you were able to get away from him.

Yep, it was pretty terrifying, to say the least. Oh, and thank you for the cake! *gives some in return* :cake:

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As horrible as some of these experiences are (especially yours, Angrogynymph :( ), I think maybe they should be in a separate thread? I think it's safe to say that being hit on in an unpleasant way is still a far cry from attempted rape.

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ANYWAY, his talking just got louder and louder, and then he started pointing downwards. At which point I instinctively glanced downwards, only to see that his cock and balls were, indeed, hanging out of his trousers. I screamed and started to run, but he grabbed me by the arm, still shouting Polish at me and pointing at his cock. Eventually I managed to yank out of his grip, and ran home faster than I even thought possible. Nowadays I take the long route home. :(

Goodness, THAT scared me and I've never been in that situation. But I was just reminded of two other instances. One was more of a hit-on, but the other was just plain creepy.

I used to work at a pizza restaurant, and the boss was a real creep. He was the type of person who hired only pretty girls. And guy he hired was for pizza delivery or for kitchen stuff. Anyway, I have no idea why he hired me because I really don't think I'm attractive at all. But apparently the cooks did, and they were constantly touching me and I guess trying to flirt with me. I kept telling them to stop, but they wouldn't, so I just left. I didn't get two week's pay. :\ And my mom was like "Oh, but they're Mexican. It's what they do." I don't care what nationality they are (and I have nothing against Hispanics, or any other nationality, mind you) but a no means no.

And then this other time, two of my college roommates took me to go see Les Miserables as a belated birthday gift and it ended pretty late and we took the train into NYC. We decided to stay at the train station late so we wouldn't have to get a connecting train and we could go right to the station we left our car at. Well, on the train home, there was this creepy guy with his dick out and he was staring at us while he masturbated. Like he flat out STARED at us and it was the filthiest, creepiest thing ever. And he got off at our station so we bolted for the car.

Thankfully he didn't follow us.

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SASE Icecream man

I think one of the most disturbing ones was when these group of quys at the library were snikering and looking at me, and said some things, I think pick up lines... It was very unnerving, because th library is MY place, so to speak, the place I hang out, and these punks just came and made me uncomfotable where I shouldn't be uncomfortable.

Another time i was walking home, and two guys said hello. It wasn't so much the words, but the way they said it and that I was all alone, up against two boys and even though I'm sure I can throw a defensive punch, and am one of the strongest girls in my class, it just upset me. I know I wasn't parinoid, because not even a moment later he said, "Fine, then, don't say hi." And his voice... *cringes*

I got hit on by a 30 year old man one time, and that was disturbing. Not only that he was 30, but that he was very bad at it. :rolleyes:

I think that one of the most uncomfortable ones is when I try to be someones freind, but that person has something else on their mind, but they're really nice, but you aren't interested... It wasn't so much as he was crude, but like a puppy dog and followed me around.

Mostly I just get whisled at, and the occassional hoots and hollers or whatever you call the animal-like sounds coming out of peoples' mouths. One time, if I remember correctly, I got whisled at 3 times during one bike ride. :blink:

The weird thing is, I have no clue why I even get hit on. perhaps it's because they are bored and want to harrass all females with legs?

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Conquerdontbow

I've got a few...

1. I was walking to work and this Jersey Shore/"gangsta" lookin' guy stops me in front of his friends and says "Oooh girl, your body just won't quit! Maybe my body can get to know my body."

My response? "Um, no, I'm late to work."

2. I walked into a coffee shop, and this really scummy looking guy asked me if he could buy me a drink and then take me back to his place. I was 16 and it was 3 in the afternoon. He reeked of liquor and I was just not a fan.

3. The best friend of a guy I used to date kept hinting at me that I had a nice chest. I'm somewhat conceited (I've posted that before) and so I would just laugh and say, "I know." Then once when we were driving to pick up my boyfriend, he reached over while driving and put his hand into my shirt. I leaned my head down and bit him. Then my boyfriend (at the time) beat the shit out of him. I almost pressed charges because I was 16 and he was 19.

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Trolley Girl

ANYWAY, his talking just got louder and louder, and then he started pointing downwards. At which point I instinctively glanced downwards, only to see that his cock and balls were, indeed, hanging out of his trousers. I screamed and started to run, but he grabbed me by the arm, still shouting Polish at me and pointing at his cock. Eventually I managed to yank out of his grip, and ran home faster than I even thought possible. Nowadays I take the long route home. :(

In such a case as that, you should definitely notify the police, and have slime like him scraped off the streets. The thing is, if he has demonstrated that he is capable of doing such horrible things, then he doesn't deserve to be walking free.

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My god, mine is not anywhere in the same league as poor Androgynymph.. That is horrifying. I would've kicked him right in his expose junk. Asshole.

I was guilted into going to a club for a friend's 21st birthday party. First off, the whole night her boyfriend spent smiling at me strangely and when we were all forming a chain to get to the outside part of the club, he kept squeezing my hand and rubbing his thumb on mine. So, that was weird already. Then, although this is not me it still pissed me off, I had to push a guy away from my friend because he tried to grab her ass as we were walking to the bathroom. While waiting outside the bathroom, a guy walks up to me and, seeing the scorpion tattooed on the back of my neck, slithers up to me and cockily leans against the wall across from me. "Sooo.. Does that scorpion of yours bite?" My friend walks out of the bathroom and I glared, replying, "No. Scorpions sting, asshole, and so do I.", and then walked away. I left shortly thereafter.

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Trolley Girl

"No. Scorpions sting, asshole, and so do I."

NICE! :cake::cake::cake: for you!

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I have one! Or a couple... I'll post more if I think of them.

I was at a going away party for my male friend who was going to sea (he was in the Navy and interested in me, though I didn't know at the time). He apparently invited ALL MALES and only me and my (taken) friend were the only girls there. So I spent the entire night fighting off advances, couldn't drink or enjoy myself because I needed to be on guard, and trying my best to hang on my friend and be entirely too close to her so they would think I wasn't interested. It back fired when I was watching video games being played (by a guy who was actually nice and liked me (again I didn't know at the time lol my fail at picking up on these things), so I liked watching him play and he even let me -almost- win when I played him *so nice of him lol*).

I was on the couch, this guy sat next to me. We had chatted earlier and I made it pretty clear I wasn't interested, but he was now drunk. With no warning, he leans over and BITES MY THIGH. BITES.

I punched him in the forehead and yelped, gaining the attention of the video gamer and he jolted over to make sure I was okay. He got manhandled out onto the porch by some other guys while I was questioned by the gamer guy and I had to keep telling people I was fine. I HAD A HUGE BRUISE. And apparently the guy told them he thought I would like it. I'm sorry, Mr. Masochist/Sadist (he was both), I don't see how, "No I don't want to drink with you," sounds like, "Yes, I like pain, please abuse me." 9.9

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I was on the couch, this guy sat next to me. We had chatted earlier and I made it pretty clear I wasn't interested, but he was now drunk. With no warning, he leans over and BITES MY THIGH. BITES.

I have also randomly been bitten, now that I think about it, by a lesbian friend.. Another lesbian friend slapped my ass so hard I couldn't set down for 30 minutes. I am fairly certain I don't walk around playing the Silverchair song "Abuse Me".. I also don't understand why they think that would possibly work. I mean, yes, I am a bit of a masochist but only with my boyfriend not random ass people.

I also posted this somewhere, I believe.. I was walking home from the bus stop one day when a van full of guys pulled up while I was waiting for the crosswalk light to change. They all mooned me. When I merely stared in disgust instead of being like "Ooooooh, hey baby!", they called me a bitch and pelted me with tennis balls. They drove off before I could get their license plate, unfortunately.

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Trolley Girl

It saddens me to know what some people are capable of these days. Sometimes, it seems like there is no hope for the future of humanity....

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Usually I don't notice when people flirt with me or hit on me. I'm rather oblivious. Sometimes, however, I do notice.

The worst was probably a guy who's part of a club I'm a member of. He has a girlfriend but they have an open relationship, and of all the cute girls in the club he decided to facebook me for a "random fling". No emotions, just sex. I turned him down.

The other interesting story I have is either the best or the worst depending on your point of view. It made my day though, and still does, so I consider it the best.

I was at a Renaissance Faire, looking at all of the beautiful weapons, specifically the pole axes and halberds. My friend made some remark about my obsession with pole axes, to which I responded that I just liked pointy things on sticks. A man standing near by shot back "I have a pointy thing on a stick for you". This is a little creepy, but it made me laugh. A lot. Ahhh, people.

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Great Thief Yatagarasu

I was on the couch, this guy sat next to me. We had chatted earlier and I made it pretty clear I wasn't interested, but he was now drunk. With no warning, he leans over and BITES MY THIGH. BITES.

I have also randomly been bitten, now that I think about it, by a lesbian friend.. Another lesbian friend slapped my ass so hard I couldn't set down for 30 minutes. I am fairly certain I don't walk around playing the Silverchair song "Abuse Me".. I also don't understand why they think that would possibly work. I mean, yes, I am a bit of a masochist but only with my boyfriend not random ass people.

I also posted this somewhere, I believe.. I was walking home from the bus stop one day when a van full of guys pulled up while I was waiting for the crosswalk light to change. They all mooned me. When I merely stared in disgust instead of being like "Ooooooh, hey baby!", they called me a bitch and pelted me with tennis balls. They drove off before I could get their license plate, unfortunately.

Tennis balls? Holy crap, were they like pre-prepared or something? Geez.

I had this real creeper in my year insist on signing my shirt on our leavers day. And I mean insists, with all of his friends going "oh but this is the last time we'll see each other!" (it really was, thank fuck I've not seen him since), and I was in a good mood anyway, so I let him. What does he do? Gets behind me, KNEELS DOWN, and writes something right at the bottom of my shirt. While he was there, he groped my ass, using the excuse that he needed something to lean on. What makes this EVEN WORSE? All his friends were still there, laughing and taking pictures. I only really realised that he'd been groping me that hard when I saw the pictures on facebook. I deleted him and all his friends immediately, and I pray that I never see him again.

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Great Thief Yatagarasu

I was at a Renaissance Faire, looking at all of the beautiful weapons, specifically the pole axes and halberds. My friend made some remark about my obsession with pole axes, to which I responded that I just liked pointy things on sticks. A man standing near by shot back "I have a pointy thing on a stick for you". This is a little creepy, but it made me laugh. A lot. Ahhh, people.

I have an example like this, actually. I was on the bus going to college when this old man gets on. There weren't any free seats, he was looking pretty frail and I was right at the front, so I stood up and gave him my seat. He sits down, and he asks if I'm really okay with me giving up my seat. I say yes...only for him to grin and ask "well, you can always sit in my lap if you want to". It was pretty obvious that he was joking, so I just awkwardly smiled back and said no. But most people I tell this story to find it more disturbing than creepy. And now that I think about it, I was round my grandparents house in the summer, and I was going to go down to this centre for the elderly with them to help out, making tea and stuff. They asked me to change before I went because I was wearing some denim shorts, and they thought I'd pick up the wrong kind of attention from the old men. I guess I'm an old geezer magnet, then.

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