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Davey

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Davey

As many of you have noticed, I'm no longer a part of this community, or forum, or whatever it is now.

I'm not here to soapbox or do a crazy passive-aggressive pouting thing - I would have done that already - but I notice, thanks to a PM I recieved this morning on the subject of the Alt. Lang. forum, that I'm still a mod.

So - wake up, guys! I'm not here anymore. Give those forums to somebody who is.

Also.. is it possible to request a deletion of my account and posts?

Well, of course it's possible to request it - I just did, didn't I? - but I really would appreciate that. I'm sure it's possible.

Thank you.

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Cate Perfect

Greenness doesn't go away even if you're de-modded. Your name will always be green, though you won't have any mod abilities.

It *is* possible for an admin to delete your account, though I'm not sure what this does to your posts (if they disappear, as well).

I, for one, have missed you and would prefer to see your posts remain. If you'd like them to be more anonymous, you could change your username and remove your av/location.

Cate

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Davey

I understand that, but I haven't been de-modded. I still have powers in both Asexual Q&A and Alternate Language, and I don't expect anyone else does. It might be in the interest of the forum to give those to someone else.

The things I have said no longer represent me and I will not have them tied to me. I will go through and edit 2200 posts, if you wish, but I'd rather someone with the power do it in one go for me.

I'm sorry you (and anyone else)'ve missed me; I would prefer not to have these messages remain public (or at all, but what Mr Jay does with his backups is, unfortunately, none of my business).

Please see what you can do - as a favour, if you'd like to think of it that way - I'd appreciate it.

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Cate Perfect

I understand. I'm not an admin anymore or I'd see what I could do. I'll chat with some people about it...

And whoever can give me your forums, I really don't care which ones I get.

Cate

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Shockwave

Cate, since you were elected as a mod I will transfer these forums temporarily to you until permanent assignments are decided.

An ex-member, you will be missed.

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Cate Perfect

Okey doke.

Jeremy, can you delete our friend's account? I know it's possible, so I suppose I'm asking if you're willing to.

Cate

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Guest

Please, please delete me too. I've been going back trying to delete all my posts, and it is too big a job for one person.

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Kevin Wood

Davy - don't go. If you want my opinion, you have something something incalculable. Don't go Davey - we need you. Please stay, you're an interesting entity

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Shockwave

I hesitate to delete your accounts because that would delete all of your posts. Every thread you started would still be there but without your posts. Every post in which you were quoted would still be there also. Considering how much each of you posted it would create a lot of incongruency.

That doesn't mean I refuse to do it but please understand that I do not want to.

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Guest

Well, I'm just saying that even if you won't, I'll just edit it out myself. I'm just asking you to make the work for me easier.

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gypsylady

This is so sad... Couldn't you leave us with your words?

I joined just after and it was such a mess. No one here has any hard feelings toward you and, even if you don't want to be associated with this site, would you consider changing your name so that your words could remain? You have been a valued and appreciated presence for a long time, from what I can gather.

So sorry you need to go.

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Live R Perfect

Oh wow! This is really sad...

I can appreciate why you might want to erase things you may have said that you feel no longer represent you, but it just seems a bit extreme to erase yourself completely from the AVEN archives. You WERE here and you DID say whatever you said. Some of us will remember that, and you will remember that. What am I saying? I just don't think it's entirely necessary, that's all. But it's up to you, of course.

Take care. I hope life treats you well. :)

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Naissur9

you'll be missed :(

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junie99

Sorry to see you go. :( I think what Cate mentioned might work, changing your Avatar/location removed along with changing your user name. That should make all your posts anonymous.

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A-Ole

Davey, I hope you'll reconsider your decision and return, perhaps after you've had a break; your point of view still has value to the asexual community.

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Guest

Right, fellows: here it is.

A final update.

After discovering how fucking LONG it takes to edit out even three posts, I lost interest in the prospect of going through 2200. Combined with the hope that someday I'll be able to come back.. I think I'll leave 'em.

This isn't a pity me post, and it isn't a rant or a criticism about the site and how it's gone to hell and it's all your fault (although it is :D) - it's a goodbye message to a few friends, a last-ditch attempt at a mending of a few broken relationships (because I hate to leave with enemies), and a look forward. Naturally I didn't expect to write something like this, but I think you deserve it.

When I found this community in March of 2004, I had already decided, for the most part, that I was asexual. It wasn't a decision made for healthy reasons, I admit, and it was elitist and pejorative, but it was a decision. If you read (actually you can't, because I just got rid of them) my welcome posts, you might shake your head at the alternatively incredibly pompous and totally insecure boy whose words you'd read there.

That was a bad sentence, but don't stop me now - I'm on a roll.

I had just got through Neuromancer, and I thought I had invented pomposity - so I was quick to condemn sex, whatever it is, as the sick, weak, banal manifestations of a person's imperfect intellect. So it makes sense, in retrospect, that I would have been quick to dive into a community full of what I thought was some crazy Aryan post-human race. I was proud, in a sickly sort of way, and it showed. Reading over my posts recently, I felt like I was looking at a picture of a small boy standing on tip-toes to see over a counter, to see all of you.

But with the help of a lot of wonderful people (including but not limited to Nancy, Karl, David or boa, the expired Fluffy and Tressa, the mostly expired Julie, and Victoria or Cate Perfect, who I'll get to in a moment) and a few real life people, and certainly time (which played no small role in my maturation, of course), I feel I have grown into a person who can at least adequately fake maturity. I was able to become comfortable with you, and I was, in my prime, one of the major life-forces of this forum. I am proud of that.

There are some things I'm not terribly proud of, however - pettiness, mostly. I have wronged a number of people in this community, whether they care or not, simply by virtue of being a smartass and a brat. Those people include Steve, Karl, Princess-Spock, and most recently Victoria.

To you and to anyone else I've forgotten (or worse, neglected to notice): I'm sorry.

Truly.

But enough about the past - I'd much rather talk about the future.

AVEN is a beautiful thing. I can remember it being more beautiful than it is now, but it's STILL beautiful. There is simply no place on the internet like it. Even now (and more notably a little bit before now), when tensions are running high and people seem to be jumping ship left, right, and centre, there's an atmosphere that fosters communication and love (yes, love - although I'll be the first to admit that my idea of love is a little different from the popular one, I do think it's a good one). The communicative atmosphere is what coaxed some comments from me that are - erm - tender, in retrospect. So comfortable is this forum that one can forget that everything one says is public - and apparently set in stone.

Oops. That was a little vindictive, wasn't it?

Let's get back to the compliments.

What you (and we, I suppose) have created here is truly an oasis. It is nothing short of a miracle, in fact, that such spiritual connections can be forged with only words in such a short amount of time.

I implore you: you've got something special, man - keep it that way! WORK to keep it that way! Don't let it slip away. Keep asking questions. Keep falling in love with each other. Keep working to create an atmosphere Stay where people get to know each other deeply. Stay open - don't let it feel like a question-and-answer column. Make sure it keeps feeling the way it does now - like a cozy living room with a fire in a log cabin somewhere. Keep it interesting, stay interested! And whatever you do, don't let the kinds of feelings I had when I came in pollute the forum's air. Never mind the bad publicity it entails - you just don't want to be breathing in hate and prejudice as you sip your cocoa in your comfy loveseats, right? Keep it free, keep it understanding, and keep it open.

Most of all, keep fighting for knowledge. Keep thinking critically and creatively. Don't rely on the dogma of the past. Whatever this thing we share is - we don't know ANYTHING about it. And if we do know SOME things, they're certainly the tip of the iceberg. Keep learning. Don't shove the bloody FAQ down someone's throat if they present a new idea - and maybe more importantly, don't let the new idea die off. Try not to hijack threads like that - and if you do, try to bring up the question elsewhere.

That isn't to say, of course, that you shouldn't be able to decide something's wrong if it is - but I DO recommend that you think about it first.

Why should I care whether or not this forum goes to hell (oops - recycled colloquialism.. don't tell anyone)? I'm still pretty sure I'm asexual, and I hope to be able to spend a little time living and (hopefully :D) getting a little experience, and then be able to come back to AVEN in the future. If you let my shining oasis turn into some crazy radioactive wasteland, I shall be VERY put out.

So, in closing: So long, AVEN. Feel free to talk to me any way you can - I'm not going to have any contact info on my profile, but I'll be notified of PMs and you can always ask someone who knows someone who knows me.

See you around :D

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Davey

Right, fellows: here it is.

A final update.

After discovering how fucking LONG it takes to edit out even three posts, I lost interest in the prospect of going through 2200. Combined with the hope that someday I'll be able to come back.. I think I'll leave 'em.

This isn't a pity me post, and it isn't a rant or a criticism about the site and how it's gone to hell and it's all your fault (although it is :D) - it's a goodbye message to a few friends, a last-ditch attempt at a mending of a few broken relationships (because I hate to leave with enemies), and a look forward. Naturally I didn't expect to write something like this, but I think you deserve it.

When I found this community in March of 2004, I had already decided, for the most part, that I was asexual. It wasn't a decision made for healthy reasons, I admit, and it was elitist and pejorative, but it was a decision. If you read (actually you can't, because I just got rid of them) my welcome posts, you might shake your head at the alternatively incredibly pompous and totally insecure boy whose words you'd read there.

That was a bad sentence, but don't stop me now - I'm on a roll.

I had just got through Neuromancer, and I thought I had invented pomposity - so I was quick to condemn sex, whatever it is, as the sick, weak, banal manifestations of a person's imperfect intellect. So it makes sense, in retrospect, that I would have been quick to dive into a community full of what I thought was some crazy Aryan post-human race. I was proud, in a sickly sort of way, and it showed. Reading over my posts recently, I felt like I was looking at a picture of a small boy standing on tip-toes to see over a counter, to see all of you.

But with the help of a lot of wonderful people (including but not limited to Nancy, Karl, David or boa, the expired Fluffy and Tressa, the mostly expired Julie, and Victoria or Cate Perfect, who I'll get to in a moment) and a few real life people, and certainly time (which played no small role in my maturation, of course), I feel I have grown into a person who can at least adequately fake maturity. I was able to become comfortable with you, and I was, in my prime, one of the major life-forces of this forum. I am proud of that.

There are some things I'm not terribly proud of, however - pettiness, mostly. I have wronged a number of people in this community, whether they care or not, simply by virtue of being a smartass and a brat. Those people include Steve, Karl, Princess-Spock, and most recently Victoria.

To you and to anyone else I've forgotten (or worse, neglected to notice): I'm sorry.

Truly.

But enough about the past - I'd much rather talk about the future.

AVEN is a beautiful thing. I can remember it being more beautiful than it is now, but it's STILL beautiful. There is simply no place on the internet like it. Even now (and more notably a little bit before now), when tensions are running high and people seem to be jumping ship left, right, and centre, there's an atmosphere that fosters communication and love (yes, love - although I'll be the first to admit that my idea of love is a little different from the popular one, I do think it's a good one). The communicative atmosphere is what coaxed some comments from me that are - erm - tender, in retrospect. So comfortable is this forum that one can forget that everything one says is public - and apparently set in stone.

Oops. That was a little vindictive, wasn't it?

Let's get back to the compliments.

What you (and we, I suppose) have created here is truly an oasis. It is nothing short of a miracle, in fact, that such spiritual connections can be forged with only words in such a short amount of time.

I implore you: you've got something special, man - keep it that way! WORK to keep it that way! Don't let it slip away. Keep asking questions. Keep falling in love with each other. Keep working to create an atmosphere Stay where people get to know each other deeply. Stay open - don't let it feel like a question-and-answer column. Make sure it keeps feeling the way it does now - like a cozy living room with a fire in a log cabin somewhere. Keep it interesting, stay interested! And whatever you do, don't let the kinds of feelings I had when I came in pollute the forum's air. Never mind the bad publicity it entails - you just don't want to be breathing in hate and prejudice as you sip your cocoa in your comfy loveseats, right? Keep it free, keep it understanding, and keep it open.

Most of all, keep fighting for knowledge. Keep thinking critically and creatively. Don't rely on the dogma of the past. Whatever this thing we share is - we don't know ANYTHING about it. And if we do know SOME things, they're certainly the tip of the iceberg. Keep learning. Don't shove the bloody FAQ down someone's throat if they present a new idea - and maybe more importantly, don't let the new idea die off. Try not to hijack threads like that - and if you do, try to bring up the question elsewhere.

That isn't to say, of course, that you shouldn't be able to decide something's wrong if it is - but I DO recommend that you think about it first.

Why should I care whether or not this forum goes to hell (oops - recycled colloquialism.. don't tell anyone)? I'm still pretty sure I'm asexual, and I hope to be able to spend a little time living and (hopefully :D) getting a little experience, and then be able to come back to AVEN in the future. If you let my shining oasis turn into some crazy radioactive wasteland, I shall be VERY put out.

So, in closing: So long, AVEN. Feel free to talk to me any way you can - I'm not going to have any contact info on my profile, but I'll be notified of PMs and you can always ask someone who knows someone who knows me.

See you around :D

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KAGU143

I'm going to miss you terribly, Davey. :cry: Who will be in charge of the BBQ now at our impromptu parties?

I understand the need to move forward, though. I do SO hope that you come back for a visit once in a while, even if it's just on rare occasions.

You have given me a lot of hope in at least SOME of today's young people, and in what the future may hold when we oldies finally get out of your way and let you take over. I sincerely thank you for that gift.

Take tender care of yourself, my friend. May you find smooth roads and pleasant company on your journey through life.

Until we meet again .....

-Greybird

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VivreEstEsperer
Make sure it keeps feeling the way it does now - like a cozy living room with a fire in a log cabin somewhere

Many words of wisdom.

And I love how you put that - because I never quite realized it, but that IS exactly how AVEN feels, like a cozy living room with a fire in a log cabin somewhere. I like that.

I'm still not sure why you're leaving, but I respect your choice and honestly wish you the best of luck in figuring out who you are, what you want in life and how to get it. These questions are never easy. Stay well and know that there's always support here if you need it.

Kate

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gypsylady
There are some things I'm not terribly proud of, however - pettiness, mostly. I have wronged a number of people in this community, whether they care or not, simply by virtue of being a smartass and a brat. Those people include Steve, Karl, Princess-Spock, and most recently Victoria.

Thank you for such an honest and caring post.

Why should I care whether or not this forum goes to hell (oops - recycled colloquialism.. don't tell anyone)? I'm still pretty sure I'm asexual, and I hope to be able to spend a little time living and (hopefully :D) getting a little experience, and then be able to come back to AVEN in the future. If you let my shining oasis turn into some crazy radioactive wasteland, I shall be VERY put out.

What a wonderful and, obviously, heartfelt post. While I haven't been around long and am somewhat ignorant of the circumstances of your leaving, I greatly admire your forthrightness, as well as your open support and admiration of this site.

I know you will be missed. I hope you will be back before too much time goes by.

Gypsy

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Cate Perfect

Well, that was a beautiful post, my friend. *pats big little AVENbrother* I know things are different now and perhaps in time it won't seem so difficult to be part of the community. I'll miss you. No hard feelings about our (snarky on both sides) conversation earlier, I hope.

Cate

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Shockwave
I feel I have grown into a person who can at least adequately fake maturity.

Well, the maturity in that post was certainly not faked. It almost brought a confirmed stoic to tears.

I will miss you and hope that someday soon you do return.

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Live R Perfect

You have always been an exceptionally mature member of this community for your age, Davey, and your post illustrates this yet again. If it's any consolation, I never felt particularly wronged by anything you did - we are all only human after all, and we all say or do things that we regret sometimes. If anything I was never entirely sure why your behaviour changed recently, and maybe I should have spoken with you about your concerns before it came to this. However, I have the upmost confidence that this is not the last we will see of you here. Take care of yourself, and please feel free to contact me if you wish. Au revoir :wink:

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mindlife

The best to you, Davey.

Enjoy life "out there."

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Jordan

Son-of-a-bitch, why? Nevermind, none of my business :D You're a community leader abandoning your posts! Well, whatever it is, take care, friend :)

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bard of aven

Fuk! Now who wil corect my mispelins? :x

boa

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LonePiper

Although I must have missed whatever it was you did (or just didn't think it was really something to worry about :)), I can see you are quite adamant in your decision, and I'm sure you have your reasons.

It will be sad to see you go, and I wish you luck in the future.

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ApolloSeek

Davey,

For my part I forgive you.

You may depart AVEN if you wish. However, it seems more rational to take

a hiatus first and then decide.

There are no posting requirements for AVEN. I firmly believe that our

fearless leader (AVENguy) did that for a reason. In fairness to him, I will

not speculate further.

You mentioned that some of your posts you now dislike. I can understand

feeling that way. However, have you examined the actual proportion of

posts you consider bad to the total? I'll bet it's a small (5-10%). Have you

considered deleting only the 0-10% that deem bad? Why destroy

100% to 90% of posts that are good because of the 0-10% that are bad?

You also mentioned reading Neuromancer. I have read it, too. It is a

complex and hard-hitting book. And it does force you to think. Keep in

mind that a deep work like Neuromancer requires time to

think thru. Personally I admire you for taking on a work like

Neuromancer at the time you did.

Also keep in mind sometimes you must plow a trench with your nose to

learn. It's happened to me more often that I'd like. Such happens to all.

Therefore you are not alone in this experience. It's reality.

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Gorax

Davey, that long message was quite moving :shock: I'm really sad to see you go...

Ah what the hell, AVEN is like Diablo II, once you invest a certain amount of time into it, you'll ALWAYS come back! So see you later, and have a nice vacation :)

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