leileilei Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 Really interesting, you guys~ thanks for sharing! I’m glad it’s not just me, but I do wish it was included as part of the curriculum for sexual education in schools! I remember thinking I was such a “late bloomer” during all of those life management classes, hahaha! The knowledge would have saved me a lot of heartache! 😅 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Zagadka Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 Yea, i wish the entirety of society wasn't talking about how important sex is. I kinda hate to sound like a religious preacher, but even they emphasize how important sex and reproduction are. If someone had told me that not having sex was fine, I would have been happier sooner than I figured it out myself. "Sex ed" should focus a lot more on general puberty and health issues than sex itself. Especially for girls, they have a lot to suddenly go through. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
weird elf Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 10 minutes ago, Zagadka said: i wish the entirety of society wasn't talking about how important sex is This. I do feel like the fact that so many allo people* can barely wrap their heads around the concept of asexuality is exacerbated by the way society overhypes sex. *especially our age and up, I have one specific friend of mine in mind who's in her early 50s and ... yeah. Does not get it. Then again, might not be the perfect example because when it comes to all things sex she's pretty much my polar opposite. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
CourtlyLove Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 I first heard of the term asexual in high school biology and briefly thought that I would like to be a hydra. 😆 I thought that it sounded very reasonable with the added benefit of not having to spend time thinking about, having, or preparing for sexual activities. Sidebar *has anyone else noticed just how much time allosexual people spend on these things?* I finally came to the conclusion that I am asexual in my mid 30s only after several relationships that failed chiefly due to my avoidance of sex. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
LiteraryTea Posted February 27, 2020 Share Posted February 27, 2020 I figured it out a week before my 30th birthday which was over 6 months ago. I really confirmed it today when I joined this forum. It's freeing, but also saddening. Sad because I lost a lot of my life thinking I'm a late bloomer and I just need to find the right person which put so much unnecessary stress on me, and the concept of possibly never finding someone to fall in love with because of my sexuality. It's heartbreaking, but at least I know that I'm not abnormal. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tyrre Posted March 3, 2020 Share Posted March 3, 2020 On 2/27/2020 at 8:44 AM, LiteraryTea said: I figured it out a week before my 30th birthday which was over 6 months ago. I really confirmed it today when I joined this forum. It's freeing, but also saddening. Sad because I lost a lot of my life thinking I'm a late bloomer and I just need to find the right person which put so much unnecessary stress on me, and the concept of possibly never finding someone to fall in love with because of my sexuality. It's heartbreaking, but at least I know that I'm not abnormal. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tyrre Posted March 3, 2020 Share Posted March 3, 2020 Youre not alone. I feel lonely because i cant find someone, this year im 35 (im a Guy) and i feel like life is passing me by big time. Its heart breaking 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
leileilei Posted March 7, 2020 Share Posted March 7, 2020 Reddit has an asexual dating/friendship thread that seems like it could be promising! I tried Acebook and it was empty, and the only person in my area was a creeper who wasn’t actually ace. 🙄 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
1helluvabutlr Posted March 8, 2020 Share Posted March 8, 2020 I am trying to start something in NYC I have another demisexual friend who is in her 30s that wants to meet other demis in that area, I am willing to travel all the way to NYC to meet other asexual peeps I just need to do it in the summer time. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mayte Posted March 9, 2020 Share Posted March 9, 2020 On 3/7/2020 at 9:48 AM, leileilei said: Reddit has an asexual dating/friendship thread that seems like it could be promising! I tried Acebook and it was empty, and the only person in my area was a creeper who wasn’t actually ace. 🙄 I'm on acebook and a few other ace sites. If I only looked for people from my country, or even continent, I would never meet anyone. Sadly for me most people ignore me too probably seeing where I'm from. Anyway, I've had some nice conversations with a few people from acebook. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
leileilei Posted March 9, 2020 Share Posted March 9, 2020 18 hours ago, Mayte said: I'm on acebook and a few other ace sites. If I only looked for people from my country, or even continent, I would never meet anyone. Sadly for me most people ignore me too probably seeing where I'm from. Anyway, I've had some nice conversations with a few people from acebook. Yeah, it’s tough! Glad we have each other here at least! Maybe I should spread my reach out on Acebook more, thanks for the tip! I got burned when I saw that local person and they were inappropriate and I bailed fast, ha! 😅 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
weird elf Posted March 9, 2020 Share Posted March 9, 2020 18 hours ago, Mayte said: If I only looked for people from my country, or even continent, I would never meet anyone. What continent is that? o.O Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mayte Posted March 9, 2020 Share Posted March 9, 2020 55 minutes ago, leileilei said: Yeah, it’s tough! Glad we have each other here at least! Maybe I should spread my reach out on Acebook more, thanks for the tip! I got burned when I saw that local person and they were inappropriate and I bailed fast, ha! 😅 IMO, ace people who want to date should try to be more open because there are not many of us out there, and you never know, you might make good friends at least. I haven't had bad experiences besides being outright ignored, ahaha. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mayte Posted March 9, 2020 Share Posted March 9, 2020 44 minutes ago, weird elf said: What continent is that? o.O South America. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
agrahamnash Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 (edited) On 2/20/2020 at 8:19 AM, leileilei said: So, did any of you learn the term “asexual” later in life? I have always been asexual, but never had a term for it until I was 30, and it was a HUGE revelation for me. Looking back, I see how different my life would have been if I had learned what it was at a young age and that it wasn’t some inherent problem with me that I needed to “fix” by having a boyfriend and trying to be “normal” like everyone else. Has anyone else experienced something like this? I just learned about it recently (I just turned 32) and wish I would have learned about it sooner in life. Edited March 12, 2020 by agrahamnash 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MakeupJunkie4 Posted March 12, 2020 Share Posted March 12, 2020 I learned about the term "asexuality" when I was 29, but I accepted the way I was in my early 20's. I liked to say that I had "no" orientation (jokingly), and even though I would often say "if it happens, it happens - but I'm not holding my breath!", I knew it wasn't likely that I would find someone and live the fairytale like most of my friends did. When I found out there was a title to it (and that there were others like me), I was overjoyed! I agree with some of the other here who say it's a bit lonely at times - but also it's very freeing. I personally love the freedom of my life and having complete say so over what I do and where I go. I wouldn't change that for anything. I also like not having to "share" my every thought with someone else. I like, no - I LOVE having my space. I live with one of my parents, and they're "my limit" as far as life-sharing goes. 😉 I think as they continue in their senior years, it's important for them to have someone look after them, and since I'm around and unattached, why not? The only thing I struggle with is not having friends to spend time with, because 99% of them are married with kids (or workaholics). But other than that, I think my life arrangement is just right! 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AzureEmbers Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 On 2/19/2020 at 5:41 PM, leileilei said: Man, it’s weird how much we retain, isn’t it?! I vividly remember the Super Smash Bros commercial for the N64, hahaha! Lol, I definitely remember this. My brother had a N64 and we played the heck out of this game with my cousin and (at the time) best friend. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AzureEmbers Posted March 13, 2020 Share Posted March 13, 2020 On 2/20/2020 at 6:19 AM, leileilei said: So, did any of you learn the term “asexual” later in life? I have always been asexual, but never had a term for it until I was 30, and it was a HUGE revelation for me. Looking back, I see how different my life would have been if I had learned what it was at a young age and that it wasn’t some inherent problem with me that I needed to “fix” by having a boyfriend and trying to be “normal” like everyone else. Has anyone else experienced something like this? I learned about the ace spectrum about five years ago. Still figuring myself out, but I know I'm on it. It is comforting to know that there isn't anything wrong with me, and I don't have to force myself to be something I'm not, though I do wish for things that may never happen. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MakeupJunkie4 Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 So just curious - was anyone else surprised to see this thread in the "Older Asexuals" section...or was that just me? Like oh WOW....I guess I've reached that stage...😂 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 8 minutes ago, Jenna444 said: So just curious - was anyone else surprised to see this thread in the "Older Asexuals" section...or was that just me? Like oh WOW....I guess I've reached that stage...😂 How do you think I feel? (I'm over 60) 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 @Jenna444 it's simply an administrative thing to keep all "age group" threads in one place. Mind most people of all ages seem to gravitate to the same ones 😋 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Snao Cone Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 10 hours ago, Jenna444 said: So just curious - was anyone else surprised to see this thread in the "Older Asexuals" section...or was that just me? Like oh WOW....I guess I've reached that stage...😂 People in their 30s are old enough to get tired of so many threads of teenagers asking questions. (not that it's bad they're asking questions, just that they can get repetitive and naïve.) 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
- Saph - Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 12 hours ago, Jenna444 said: So just curious - was anyone else surprised to see this thread in the "Older Asexuals" section...or was that just me? Like oh WOW....I guess I've reached that stage...😂 People in their 20s also have their thread in the Older Asexuals forum. In this context 'Older Asexuals' would apply to all who have already passed the puberty stage. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kiaroskuro Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 3 hours ago, Snao Cone said: People in their 30s are old enough to get tired of so many threads of teenagers asking questions. (not that it's bad they're asking questions, just that they can get repetitive and naïve.) Yes, but sometimes people in their 30s ask naïve questions, too. *ahem* 🙈 So there's really no way of escaping them 😄 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Janus the Fox Posted March 15, 2020 Share Posted March 15, 2020 3 hours ago, Snao Cone said: People in their 30s are old enough to get tired of so many threads of teenagers asking questions. (not that it's bad they're asking questions, just that they can get repetitive and naïve.) Questions about Asexuality from Teens? I welcome it 😛 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gothic Posted March 27, 2020 Share Posted March 27, 2020 On 3/15/2020 at 7:40 AM, Snao Cone said: People in their 30s are old enough to get tired of so many threads of teenagers asking questions. (not that it's bad they're asking questions, just that they can get repetitive and naïve.) Oh my god, I know. It's probably a good thing... but still 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gothic Posted March 27, 2020 Share Posted March 27, 2020 28 y/o swooping in. Maybe the first time I heard the word asexual was when I was in my early 20's. My friends and I were having drinks outside at night and we were sharing are favorite dragonball z characters. I said Frieza, and one of them said "he's gay" or something, the other more astutely put it "I think he's asexual." That word really stuck with me, though I only understood it on the surface at the time. Now I find that asexuality is bound to my substance 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted March 27, 2020 Share Posted March 27, 2020 @Rasluka, welcome to AVEN 🎂 🎂 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
leileilei Posted March 27, 2020 Share Posted March 27, 2020 @Rasluka Oh man, I love DBZ and I hadn’t even thought about that! Haha, love it! 😆 I legit cried when he killed Krillin. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gothic Posted March 27, 2020 Share Posted March 27, 2020 13 hours ago, Skycaptain said: @Rasluka, welcome to AVEN 🎂 🎂 Thank you 2 hours ago, leileilei said: @Rasluka Oh man, I love DBZ and I hadn’t even thought about that! Haha, love it! 😆 I legit cried when he killed Krillin. Yea, dbz was ahead of its time. Poor krillin, he came back stronger though 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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