Where do I fit... and what do you call this?

[A.J.]

(sorry if this doesn't belong here or something)

I know for sure that I've always been aromantic, but I've been attracted to people before... in non-romantic and non-sexual ways ...

Before I found this site I never knew how to describe them; but now that I've looked it up, there's 2 types that I've felt (they don't happen with the same people):

1. 'squish' describes one of the feelings perfectly. This has happened only four times that I can remember. With 2 girls and 2 guys.

2. I sometimes experience the "aesthetic attraction" thing with people I see on TV or on the street. I can tell when someone's very physically attractive, but I usually don't think anything else of it. However, only once in a while I will see a person that I just REALLY enjoy looking at, male or female. They're no more attractive than other attractive people, but for some reason their looks are "different" and "special" to me.

With my squishes it(gender of the person) doesn't really matter. I basically become attracted solely to their personality and how they carry themselves (their looks, sexuality, sex/gender never mattered). Do other aromantics feel this way? I read that was called being "panromantic", but I'm not romantic. So is it pan-something-or-other? Or is the insignificance of gender just a given with aromantics?

I hope I made myself sort of clear, and I think I even confused myself a little bit. Sorry.

[brontide]

2. I sometimes experience the "aesthetic attraction" thing with people I see on TV or on the street. I can tell when someone's very physically attractive, but I usually don't think anything else of it. However, only once in a while I will see a person that I just REALLY enjoy looking at, male or female. They're no more attractive than other attractive people, but for some reason their looks are "different" and "special" to me.

Yup, I think this is how I experience 'aesthetic attraction' too. For me it's not an actual 'attraction' and I don't feel drawn to them in any way, I just find them nice to look at.

With my squishes it(gender of the person) doesn't really matter. I basically become attracted solely to their personality and how they carry themselves (their looks, sexuality, sex/gender never mattered). Do other aromantics feel this way?

Well, I'm debating whether I'm aromantic but I definitely feel the same way about the gender, looks, etc. of the people to whom I become 'attracted'.

I read that was called being "panromantic", but I'm not romantic. So is it pan-something-or-other? Or is the insignificance of gender just a given with aromantics?

These days I'm more likely to call myself 'panromantic', and honestly, the only thing that has changed is my definition of 'romantic'.

I'm not sure what the term would be otherwise!