Hikaru Posted February 13, 2011 Share Posted February 13, 2011 My mother originally told me it was a phase, but she eventually came around. My father on the other hand always dismisses me whenever I try to tell him. Link to post Share on other sites
Moon Thief Posted February 19, 2011 Share Posted February 19, 2011 I've hinted at the topic before, but they showed no understanding of it whatsoever. Link to post Share on other sites
MadRat Posted April 19, 2011 Share Posted April 19, 2011 I haven´t seen my father for 10 years and my mother never asked me about my orientation. But she knows I don´t want to have children and that I´m introverted and not interested in relationships, especialy not interested in getting married. So even without a name for it, she probably knows I´m different from majority of people. I don´t think I would be able to explain to her I´m asexual, moreover I don´t think I´m 100% asexual - rather some kind of grey-A, which is even more confusing. I can´t show her AVEN and tell her: "Just read and you will understand." because she will not - she doesn´t understand english. If she knew I´m a grey-A, it would change nothing, so why to talk about it? Link to post Share on other sites
chelseagirl84 Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 Only my mom know about my being asexual, and telling her was a mistake. How so? Link to post Share on other sites
Vdougie Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 Yes, I have told both parents. My dad seems to accept it, but my mom says I will find the right girl one day. <_< Cliched line. Link to post Share on other sites
Treval Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 No, but not because it's something I'm ashamed of or would deny if it came up. In fact, the only reason I haven't is because I don't feel the need to bring up my sex life, or lack thereof, and it's just never come up. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest member25959 Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 Yes, I have been for a while now. Link to post Share on other sites
LouLou Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 I've told my mom after a night of drinking and my dad...it's just never come up. I think he knows how I am and the topic of boys just never comes up. I think he's kinda figured it out a bit and has always just accepted the fact that I'm just not interested. My mom on the other hand I think she's not 100% convinced and thinks it'll change and I wish she wouldn't treat it as such :/ Link to post Share on other sites
never odd or even Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 i've hinted at it a good bit, my mum seems more open than my dad, but i can tell they dont get it. i'm quite a questioner, and i think that they think the questioning is just a phase, but i've always been like this, i just feel free to ask more questions and not give a fuck. i might one day, and i might not. either way i'm not prepared to have dumb reactions like 'so when did you choose to be asexual'.... Link to post Share on other sites
lifegoeson Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 No. A huge part of the reason is that my mother is almost certainly asexual and if she knew what the label meant I think it might destroy her. Link to post Share on other sites
Asexy Existentialist Posted April 24, 2011 Share Posted April 24, 2011 No. A huge part of the reason is that my mother is almost certainly asexual and if she knew what the label meant I think it might destroy her. How so? Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted April 24, 2011 Share Posted April 24, 2011 No. A huge part of the reason is that my mother is almost certainly asexual and if she knew what the label meant I think it might destroy her. How so? Maybe Life means that their mother might feel that she has transmitted her asexuality to Life and she'd be very sad that that had happened because it does cause the asexual person some difficulties (relationships, etc.). But there's no research that shows asexuality is transmitted genetically yet. Link to post Share on other sites
Rhaenys Posted April 24, 2011 Share Posted April 24, 2011 Out to my mum got shot down and lectured about how I'm selfish & nasty to deprive my nonexistent husband of his pleasure & that if I didn't have sex with an SO it meant I didn't love him. Dad on the other hand is conservative & sex averse when it comes to me so no I haven't told him Link to post Share on other sites
the Lady Ashuko Posted May 11, 2011 Share Posted May 11, 2011 I tried telling my mom once a few years ago and gave up on it when she told me I hadn't found the right person. :S She hasn't brought it up directly but has complained some that she may never have grandkids (I also have a sister who is sexual but may not be able to) so maybe she got the hint. Link to post Share on other sites
lifegoeson Posted May 11, 2011 Share Posted May 11, 2011 I missed this first time around. My mother is fixated on being 'normal' and struggles with the idea of falling outside of heteronormativity...she's said to me before that she simply can't imagine not being seen as socially normative. That coupled with the fact that it's messing up her own marriage as it is (which i think would only get worse if she could label it) is what tells me she probably wouldn't handle it too well applied to herself. No. A huge part of the reason is that my mother is almost certainly asexual and if she knew what the label meant I think it might destroy her. How so? Maybe Life means that their mother might feel that she has transmitted her asexuality to Life and she'd be very sad that that had happened because it does cause the asexual person some difficulties (relationships, etc.). But there's no research that shows asexuality is transmitted genetically yet. Link to post Share on other sites
SquirrelCat Posted May 12, 2011 Share Posted May 12, 2011 To mom: No. But my mother is not stupid, I think she's noticed that something isn't "normal" about me. So a part of her knows... I'm sure of it. If I tell her I doubt that she will be surprised, and I also think that she will accept it. My mother is intelligent and considerate, and she do not give a fuck about normality :lol: To dad: Impossible, he's been dead for 12 years. Link to post Share on other sites
Deremna Posted May 12, 2011 Share Posted May 12, 2011 Out to both.. Neither one gives a shit because it doesn't change who I am. Plus, and I have stated this before, I'm sure my dad was quite happy because he was probably thinking "Yay! My baby girl doesn't like sex!".. :lol: Link to post Share on other sites
Asexy Librarian Posted May 27, 2011 Share Posted May 27, 2011 My mom still holds out that I'll get married and make babies some day, even though I have said since I was a teen that I am not interested in dating, relationships or marriage. I'm about to turn 32 and I think she is finally starting to realize that maybe I'm telling the truth. I have had a few girlfriends, but I wouldn't call them normal relationships. And in every case, the relationship ended because I refused to have children. Funny thing is that my mom is pretty asexual herself, so I don't get why she is in denial about me. For my whole life she has never dated anyone. I have often wondered how I was ever made haha. My step dad, whom I speak with on occasion doesn't really get it. I have tried to explain that I don't need the comfort of another person in my life, and I don't care at all for sex. I have never used the term "asexual" in any of my discussions though. I find that it is easier with family to just take the time to explain the way I feel. Labels are convenient for short chats with strangers though. Link to post Share on other sites
Harkins Posted May 30, 2011 Share Posted May 30, 2011 No, but I will probably tell them. I don't really care about telling my friends whether I'm asexual or not, because I wouldn't tell them if I was sexual. With my parents though, I always promised I would talk to my mom if I ever decided to become sexually active. I respect the relationship I have with both my parents, so I probably will eventually sit them down and explain everything. I can't help but think they would be somewhat relieved, but probably a little confused. I know they're not going to get upset over that whole grandchildren thing because I don't think they ever expected that from me. I think they'd have a harder time understanding some of the gender norm issues I have or the whole panromantic thing, because my mom and I still get in monthly fights over me dressing "like a guy", so I'll probably limit the discussion to just asexuality. Link to post Share on other sites
Sadfriend Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 Just came out (in a way) to my mother, though I never actually used the word asexual. I told her about how there are people who never feel any attraction to sleep or have a relationship with another person, how I've never been attracted to a guy and stuff like that. I asked her what she would think if I was a virgin even after I turn 30 and she said she still lives me no matter what. Rather shocking since I thought she would instantly think I was lesbian or something. Mission accomplished I guess, except maybe not in the AVEN way Link to post Share on other sites
allons-y-alonso Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 I identify as grey-A and panromantic. My parents think that I'm bisexual, because I have been in relationships with people of multiple genders. My mother understands what asexuality is, but she doesn't know how I identify. Both of my parents know that I have been in same-sex relationships and are very supportive. I know they would be supportive if I explained my sexuality to them, but there are certain reasons I'm reluctant to tell them. Link to post Share on other sites
TheAceOfHearts Posted June 26, 2011 Share Posted June 26, 2011 Ive only ever told my mum but she said it was stupid and its not a real thing and Im too young and reckless to even know what Im talking about. The next day she was telling her friends and I overheard her. Im going to tell my best friend Im ace when I see her next because she's soo supportive of me and I supported her whene she realised she was bi so I hope she'll do the same for me Link to post Share on other sites
Member33070 Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Yep, both of them, for about six years now. Took them nearly that long to accept it, too. Link to post Share on other sites
vocaloidist Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Uh... I voted for the first option. I have trouble talking to my parents about most things, especially sex related topics. Though paradoxically, ever since I've discovered myself I have been able to be slowly more open to them. Link to post Share on other sites
Idraena Posted July 3, 2011 Share Posted July 3, 2011 Neither of my parents know and neither of them would believe me if I told them. But they don't really need to know what I (don't) get up to in the sheets. It's going to be more of an issue coming out as pan, especially since I lean towards women. Luckily, I really doubt they'll care. xD Link to post Share on other sites
Ashkaa Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 I told my parents when I was 16, before I knew what it was called, when my relationship with my childhood friend fell apart. He wanted to start dating, and I agreed at first, but I became uncomfortable with the changes it caused in our relationship. My father didn't really care but my mother refused to believe me and kept trying to set me up with people. I tried to tell her again after I found Aven but she still thinks it’s a stage. Link to post Share on other sites
Rosen Posted October 13, 2011 Share Posted October 13, 2011 I told my dad, but he was like, "Lolno." Apparently, he doesn't think that asexuality actually exists. He thinks its just a phase. He also doesn't think that people are born gay and believes that it's a choice, etc... But he strongly supports gay marriage and transgendered peoples' rights and most related causes... Which is odd, in my opinion, because he has a strong christian faith and is also a certified minister. Link to post Share on other sites
silentautumn Posted October 13, 2011 Share Posted October 13, 2011 No, I haven't told them and I think they don't need to know. I've only told them I'm not very interested in relationships or marriage. That's all they need to know. I think they would be quite accepting if I did tell them, but I don't really see why I should. Link to post Share on other sites
5_♦♣ Posted October 13, 2011 Share Posted October 13, 2011 I've told my dad. I've yet to tell my mom. Link to post Share on other sites
Rosehh Posted October 14, 2011 Share Posted October 14, 2011 I told my parents and both of my sisters. My dad is fine with it, but my mom didn't want to accept it. Link to post Share on other sites
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