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Sexuals/ultrasexuals just run for the hills while you can


Realistic husband

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prettyeyes

I wish though also that sexuals who know they couldn't handle it would indeed stop pursuing if the person they are pursuing tells them they are asexual. I am very tired of getting people who think they can just change my mind or don't take me serious when I am trying to be honest about myself.

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kiramekuchan

I think it would be hard to have an asexual/sexual relationship. Yes It can work if both people are trying but it would also be difficult. I mean, if I was in that kind of relationship, Being the sexual. Yes I would want that physical aspect but I wouldn't feel comfortable asking my other to take part when I'd know they have zero interest. Nevermind doing it as a compromise. There is just something wrong with doing someone who has no interest. It wouldn't cut it for me.

but that would again be my personal opinion.

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Guest member31022

Just because I think some people in here might find this interesting, and also because it shows my opinion on the topic - the youtube channel Hot Pieces of Ace did a week on this, and I 'interviewed' my sexual exboyfriend (who did not break up with me because I was asexy, but for various other factors affecting both of us). So here's that video part 1:

part 2:

I hope that gives some hope to people :)

Edit: Do they automatically embed? Or can I turn that off :S

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Lady Heartilly

Hehe, that was awesome! You're very entertaining, and I love your hair! :)

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Hehe, that was awesome! You're very entertaining, and I love your hair! :)

This (and I love your accents! OK, I'm a sucker for almost any accent from the UK, among other places... :) )

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  • 4 weeks later...

I don't agree with the OP, since I do believe a sexual/asexual relationship can work out of both partners are upfront and prepared to work hard. Having said that, it's not easy. I had no idea that asexuality even existed when I met my wife (and neither did she) and after over a decade it's become harder and harder for us to deal with.

So I would say go in with your eyes open. It's hard for both parties and it doesn't get easier with time.

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I don't agree with the OP, since I do believe a sexual/asexual relationship can work out of both partners are upfront and prepared to work hard. Having said that, it's not easy. I had no idea that asexuality even existed when I met my wife (and neither did she) and after over a decade it's become harder and harder for us to deal with.

So I would say go in with your eyes open. It's hard for both parties and it doesn't get easier with time.

I agree.

It is not easy. Sex is a big part of normal human romantic relationships. But it is not the only part.

My life would be easy if the girl I am seeing now had just a small interest in sex, and sometimes I feel like I should find someone else. And while it would be easy to find another girl, one who is interested in sex, it would be almost impossible to find one who I connect to on such a strong emotional level. We haven't had sex but we share a level of intimacy that I have never had with anyone else in my life and doubt I ever would.

Would I be happy to have what I have with her AND a normal sex life? Yes of course, while we're at it I would like to win the lottery and play short stop for the NY Yankees.

My point being, I can't have everything I want, I can have her OR I can have a normal sex life, it is naive to think that I could get what I get from her with another girl since I never have before.

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I think it would be hard to have an asexual/sexual relationship. Yes It can work if both people are trying but it would also be difficult. I mean, if I was in that kind of relationship, Being the sexual. Yes I would want that physical aspect but I wouldn't feel comfortable asking my other to take part when I'd know they have zero interest. Nevermind doing it as a compromise. There is just something wrong with doing someone who has no interest. It wouldn't cut it for me.

but that would again be my personal opinion.

My husband feels the same way. I have offered to have sex sometimes for his sake, or even to 'act' as if I'm into it. But he knows I'm not and wants no part of it.

It is difficult, but he has said that our relationship has no more or less difficulties than any other relationship he's had- the difficulties are just in different areas. But all realtionships have difficulties.

And to the OP- I have told him he can 'run for the hills' a hundred thousand times. I've suggested that he could probably find someone with the 'whole package'. And he does not want to. Something in our relationship keeps him here (and it certainly isn't children as we have none), though I'm sure it helps that I don't restrict him from getting his sexual needs taken care of elsewhere. But even so, your posts seem to indicate that you'd not want to be in a marriage with an asexual under any circumstance, but just be friends. I've suggested that too. I want to stay married, but if he felt the way you do, I would not at all. I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me. I'm worth more than that. Whatever my husband finds in me is enough to constitute a 'marriage' even without sex. And I guess your posts illustrate just how lucky I am, and how wonderful he is.

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I think it would be hard to have an asexual/sexual relationship. Yes It can work if both people are trying but it would also be difficult. I mean, if I was in that kind of relationship, Being the sexual. Yes I would want that physical aspect but I wouldn't feel comfortable asking my other to take part when I'd know they have zero interest. Nevermind doing it as a compromise. There is just something wrong with doing someone who has no interest. It wouldn't cut it for me.

but that would again be my personal opinion.

My husband feels the same way. I have offered to have sex sometimes for his sake, or even to 'act' as if I'm into it. But he knows I'm not and wants no part of it.

I feel pretty much the same way. I've only recently discovered that my wife is asexual. For a long time I think we both convinced ourselves that eventually whatever was 'wrong' would sort itself out. Now we know better, but that also means I have an insight into my wife's situation that makes me no longer want to inflict something on her that she finds so repugnant. At this point, I really don't know what that means for our relationship.

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EverDreaming

That was great, beyondweird! I agree, your hair and your accent are both awesome. :) Wonderful video, extremely informative! I think it's great that you and your ex apparently get along so well as friends. You both did a great job of interacting and explaining together.

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