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tranxuan

"I Want to Rip Your Clothes Off and Make Passionate Love"

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tranxuan

Does anyone else have that problem? Scaring people away because I love them too much?

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prettyeyes

Does anyone else have that problem? Scaring people away because I love them too much?

Yep. :( I don't even dare tell the person I like how much I care about them right now. If I could I would tell them how much they take the pain away and how just knowing them has made this year amazing but I can't.

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purissimus

Does anyone else have that problem? Scaring people away because I love them too much?

Yep. :( I don't even dare tell the person I like how much I care about them right now. If I could I would tell them how much they take the pain away and how just knowing them has made this year amazing but I can't.

*hugs*

Yes. :( I scared away two people I cared very deeply about cause I loved them too much. It's truly an awful feeling! :( This is the thing I find rather puzzling, how can loving someone a lot be a scary thing? What I'm trying to say is, how can being loved a lot by someone be so off-putting? I don't get it. :(

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Richly Blessed

You know what it all starts with? "Mommy, look at that funny looking man!" "Honey, we don't make comments to people about how they look". This is why no one can be honest.

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Coriander
This is the thing I find rather puzzling, how can loving someone a lot be a scary thing? What I'm trying to say is, how can being loved a lot by someone be so off-putting? I don't get it. :(

*hugs* I'm sorry that happened to you guys :(. But to answer the question, it is terrifying for the following reasons:

I feel like, since I matter so much to her, I have to watch every little thing I do or say, or I might hurt her.

There's also the fear of, "If she really knew me, she'd know I wasn't as good a person as she seems to think. Then she would be crushed." So I feel like I'm trying to live up to this ideal I imagine the other person has of me in her mind (if that makes any sense).

Also, even if I love her, if I feel like it isn't as strong as what she feels for me, there's some intense guilt going on. I can't help thinking, "If I tell her I love her, what does it mean to her? Does it mean more to her hearing it than it does for me when I say it? Am I accidentally taking advantage of her?"

So to sum it up, affection-> fear, pressure, guilt. I don't know why that happens, but it definitely does happen, and that's the clearest I can explain it.

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Rounx

Does anyone else have that problem? Scaring people away because I love them too much?

No offense but, if I had the 'I Want to Rip Your Clothes Off and Make Passionate Love to You' thrown at me I would probably never ever speak to that person again... and would resort to avoiding them forever.

However, I suppose i am not a valid model, being riddled with anxiety and nervous disorders and whatnot.

I have never scared people away because I 'love them too much', however I can see where you're coming from. Love can be very scary thing for some people. Hence why slowly coming on to show your affections for someone might be a better idea, rather than springing it on them like a surprise birthday cake.

Also, I don't think it is possible to love one 'too much' so to speak, since when in a relationship, you partner will probably want all the love that you have, be it in emotional or physical ways.

I hope everything works out for you :) Don't give up! It will be worth it in the end! :cake:

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Rounx

You know what it all starts with? "Mommy, look at that funny looking man!" "Honey, we don't make comments to people about how they look". This is why no one can be honest.

Haha, I second this.

Though if we ran around telling people what they look like, we might get in a jolly bout of trouble.

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prettyeyes

You know what it all starts with? "Mommy, look at that funny looking man!" "Honey, we don't make comments to people about how they look". This is why no one can be honest.

Haha, I second this.

Though if we ran around telling people what they look like, we might get in a jolly bout of trouble.

Oh man, if it was considered okay at all I would have a field day in my city... Most of the men here look like Satan! :lol:

I just told the person that I was crazy about them, couldn't take another second not saying it. *crosses fingers they won't throw up*

Edit: Reaction time. "I'm glad you feel that way about me. Its mutual. But every now and then I look in the mirror and wonder...What is she thinking??? Poor deluded girl. The rest of the time, I don't question it and just feel lucky and happy."

Squee! :wub:

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tranxuan

CLOSURE: I regretted sharing my friend my writing. I'm turning into a crusader of respect and restoring the comfort zone in the world.

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SpirallingSnowy

Ive had ppl say that to me and it scared the hell out of me, and i freaked..... Having someone want you that much can be off putting to people to who hesitate to share themselves with others.

And i have also loved ppl too much and freaked them out, so i know what thats like too :(

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tranxuan

Ive had ppl say that to me and it scared the hell out of me, and i freaked..... Having someone want you that much can be off putting to people to who hesitate to share themselves with others.

And i have also loved ppl too much and freaked them out, so i know what thats like too :(

Just an update on this. I fell in love with two women thereafter. AND I couldn't scare them off! LOL! They didn't love me as much as I love them. It's a good thing too because I couldn't decide on who to choose. Thus, I chose neither one of them. The good news is that they're still my friends. Awesome.

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womaninablackdress

Yup, I said that to the 19 year old woman I was trying to woo. I have no idea how to make love to a woman at all. I've realized that I'm truly a demisexual lesbian. She's so amazing--it's a shame I've scared her off. It's a shame ppl don't know more about demisexuals. We scare everyone! LOL!

First of all, kudos to you! I think it's absolutely important (and straight men need to learn this) to establish the kind of "relationship" you want with a woman. Everyone knows that once a woman has you in that "friend zone" you're there forever (unless she didn't really see you as a friend and was hiding her attraction).

This thread really got me cracking up. It's funny because I don't think I could ever experience such a high degree of passion where I end up not caring where I have sex and what we damage with the whole "event". When people tear each other's clothes off in movies I too think of how wasteful it is to do such a thing. I will also never understand why people have sex in odd, uncomfortable, dirty places when they can have sex on a comfortable bed.

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narwhal

Hmm, this is off topic and kind of random: But whenever people literally tore each others clothes off in movie sex scenes, I always couldn't help thinking about the clothes every time. I'd think, "Man, that's such a waste, to ruin perfectly good clothes by tearing them like that. Why the rush?" :mellow: Ace moment, perhaps.

Me too XD

I always thought "aw man, I hope they have a sewing kit on hand."

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RobotFish

I just don't understand what the point of ripping clothes off is anyway. Like what are you going to wear after if you've just ruined all your clothes? Maybe it's just me, but I like wearing clothes in public....

The passion is so strong that material possessions like a simple shirt are secondary concerns.

It's done in fiction to show completely unbridled lust and desire, that you're willing to tear through something just to get to their body.

It happens in real life for similar reasons, they could care less about the shirt, you can get a new one, while passion... that's something special.

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BabySquare

I know it's a pretty poor excuse but couldn't you tell her you were really drunk that night? or you've got some weird form of sexual tourettes?

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mad_scientist

Hmm, this is off topic and kind of random: But whenever people literally tore each others clothes off in movie sex scenes, I always couldn't help thinking about the clothes every time. I'd think, "Man, that's such a waste, to ruin perfectly good clothes by tearing them like that. Why the rush?" :mellow: Ace moment, perhaps.

Not to mention how much strength is required for some clothing, or how easy it would be to bruise the wearer. I'd find it more intimidating than anything.

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sonofzeal

Mod note - Just in case anyone was wondering why the thread title changed slightly, long thread titles can create odd effects with the forum software. The previous one, "I want to Rip Your Clothes Off and Make Passionate Love to You" was just barely too long. This new one's fine, at least for me. If anyone else has trouble with odd wraparound effects, please let me know via PM.

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