Asexuality VS LGBT

[der Einrad]

I know it may sound mean, but that text in a book isn't preventing you from being asexual, sure the wording in DSM can seem offensive, sure it needs to be changed. But when you put it up against what we are currently facing, it isn't a priority, but nothings stopping your community from facing that particular aspect on your own or trying to form a rally of multiple people.

Indeed, Mewi, gays have it much harder than asexuals, and transpeople have it harder still. Because asexuality as defined by AVEN is essentially orthogonal to sexual orientation, romantic orientation, and gender identity, it can occur in any combinations with those things, and much of the frequent squabblings over LGBT have more to do with it than with asexuality. That, and many aces are Christian, Republican, or in other groups that the spokesmen for a supposedly monolithic LGBT community consider The Enemy. Which is why I think the AVEN "group" is quite divided on whether an "alliance" with LGBT makes any real sense, when LGBTs have to deal with far more than "words in a book."

I suspect most aces that pursue an alliance with LGBT are some form of L, G, B or T themselves. That's fine, but many of the threads on AVEN cease to be about asexuality at all and devolve into LGBT discussions.

[Siggy]

I think that there is a common misconception regarding my initial post, but I have not seen this just "one time" but many times which lead me to here. I think a couple people within this thread would lead me to believe that my initial post was correct regarding the use of the "sex" reference on homosexuality.

Nonetheless, a specific link or quote or two might help. After that, I can decide whether it's something I would defend or disagree with.

I know it may sound mean, but that text in a book isn't preventing you from being asexual, sure the wording in DSM can seem offensive, sure it needs to be changed. But when you put it up against what we are currently facing, it isn't a priority, but nothings stopping your community from facing that particular aspect on your own or trying to form a rally of multiple people.

I totally understand about HSDD not being a priority for you. I'm not so selfish to suppose that our own issues are the most worthwhile ones in the world. I'm satisfied that you're simply aware of the issue, and would be more than satisfied if you told your friends about it. As I understand it, asexuality in the DSM is in the same position that homosexuality was two or three decades ago--if it causes distress, it's considered a disorder. Never mind that the most distress is in fact caused by societal prejudices rather than the orientation itself.

[Guest member25959]

So in all heartfulnesh can we please stop making LGBT people seem just about sexual matters?

Umm, Asexuality IS a sexual matter :P

[oneofthesun]

But how is it then the fault of the community that you've chosen to distill their lives entirely to the aspect of sex?

When I say "community" I'm talking about the activities that LGBT people do together. That isn't their whole lives.

[X Phoenix X]

So on these websites/news channels there is a person claiming to be asexual and I am often irked by the somewhat insulting manner that they go about describing the LGBT community. They often brand us all about "sex" and it is extremely offensive, being LGBT is hardly just about sex, not even remotely.

I know I'm late here, but... LGBT people might not be all about sex, but the LGBT community is. Since atypical sexual desire is the only thing all LGBT people have in common, it's what they talk about when they get together.

I'm not sure where I stand on the whole LGBT thing. I disagree with this statement though. "atypical sexual desire" what does that even mean?? See my whole issue with LGBT is that it in a way reinforces hetero-normative thinking. I mean I think LGBTQ is a necessary evil right now. Obviously we have some human rights issues in this country and we need NGO's that will fight for these rights. I consider myself asexual and I don't really see an asexual rights issue, but I think the utility in aligning ourselves with LGBTQ is for visibility purposes. All I really want is to be able to say "I'm asexual" and people just accept that and see me as a person, not broken or abnormal. Isn't that really the common bond with LGBTQ?

LGBTQ people only have their "atypical sexual desire" in common? Really? I think this is the kind of narrow-mindedness the OP was pointing out. What about their struggles, with their families, society, their own personal struggles? Most of us came to AVEN because we were looking for a sense of community, to know we weren't alone. We didn't come here just to discuss how awesome cuddling is or to date other asexual people. That's kind of how I see LGBTQ....like a hybrid support/activist group. Sure there will be people who talk about sex all the time. That's just how some people are, het, homo, or bi. Just like we have some people on here who only talk about how gross they think sex is. Some people are just very one dimensional.

Mewi, I hope that you do not judge the asexual community based on the comments of only a few people. I look forward to the day when we find no use for labels and we see the person, not the orientation. People should be free to be themselves and love who they want.