Can a person be hetero-romantic homo-sexual?

[lipstiklesbian]

Oh my god...

I AM A HETEROROMANTIC HOMOEROTIC!

I've seriously spent 5 years trying to figure out what I was. And it's nice to finally understand. But it's sad, because the only boys I've felt romantic towards are gay. <_<

Now the trick is to find someone of the opposite sex to have a romance or marriage with, who is asexual, and doesn't mind you having homosexual encounters!

[Quill Pen Gentleman]

Yes, I think it's possible. I think romantic orientations and sexual orientations can be different.

Regarding this, I would've thought that I was homoromantic bisexual, or something like it. I had sexual fantasies regarding both boys and girls, but in real life I didn't feel anything "special" around them. Now, I realize that I'm an aromantic asexual. If I was sexually inclined, I'd probably be bisexual. I consider my aromantic orientation to be bi becuase I am sensually and aesthetically attracted to men and woman on occaision.

Regarding the social orientation, I'm probably a homo-flexible social. :P I'm not too social, though.

Very interesting topic of debate, though.

[KestrelWings]

I've actually always wondered that myself- it must be confusing if someone is.

I have also wondered if someone could be aromantic (something)sexual.

http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/58958-aromantic-but-not-asexual/

According to this guy, yes. (He is kind of rude about it, actually)

[Ruth1-16]

I'm fairly sure that I'm homoromantic hetero-asexual. (I specify hetero-asexual because arousal only works with guys--barely--but I really don't care about it and would rather not go there.) I could be aromantic, depending on the definition of aromantic, but that seems to be a little shaky, depending on who you talk to. ;) I'm going with homoromantic because I would absolutely love to spend the rest of my life living with them, and I'm a physically affectionate person, but we're already very very close friends so I can't imagine "dating".

But more and more I'm getting the feeling that I am definitely a romantic person; I just didn't recognize it because I knew I was hetero-asexual (I didn't know how to describe it well but I knew the concept) and it didn't occur to me for a couple months now that my romantic orientation could be different from the sexual one.

Because of being hetero-asexual, I still identify as straight. The homoromantic bit does make my brain hurt trying to sort it all out, lol. A friend of mine told me on the phone tonight that she's known sexual people who were heterosexual and homoromantic, and that made things rather difficult for them. I can imagine. In that light, I don't think what I have is so hard to deal with. At least I'm not looking for a sexual relationship with a guy at the same time as wanting a romantic friendship with a girl! *g*

[Guest member25959]

I was also wondering the same thing.

I actually knew a Biromantic Homosexual in School.

[michaeld]

There have been heteromantic homosexual people posting here before. The fact this is possible really underlines the fact that there are two separate orientations.

http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/50952-this-is-confusing/

http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?/topic/54000-hello-people-sorry-in-advance-i-guess/

[Mariana]

hello,

i'm heterosexual homoromantic and until i was like 14 i identified myself as 'straight', considering that i felt sexually aroused by males, (and even had a 'premature' experience with a boy) but from the age 15 until like almost 17 i got really down about it, coz i didn't understand, i told myself that 'you have to accept that you like girls, ONLY girls' and at the same time i (SO stupid) told myself that i didn't want to get involved with a girl either. it just didnt feel totally right. i was more and more thinking about sex and it just didn't match, you know? and i was crushing really hard on my 'best' friend, i was like in love!! when she went away i realized better that. well, we don't talk anymore nowadays and after we stopped talking it was THEN i came to realize that i might be like that. i was already suspecting this more when i was 16, and 15 somehow, but at this age let me tell you, i was so SO lost. and when i was 16 it was all that most happened, i mean in the romantically way, coz we were almost getting somewhere, when she came back (but at 14 too.. a lot considerably), and then she kinda let me down. and then i kinda did the same to her, let's not blame all on her. well... but it was all when i was turning 17 that i assumed that. there was this teacher and, you know, i've read 'online stories' and i read lesbian ones, and one of them was about falling in love with a teacher. and this story is very sexual, and i remember (i was 13) reading and not enjoying that much, just the romantic side. so... OMG! PLIN i fell down and woke up. i'm like that! i kinda already knew it was possible, thank god there were some people that revealed that side of them (be attracted just emotionally to one gender), helping me to compreehend better that it's real. it's natural. it's how i am, how i see the world. the genders. i'm pretty sure that we are what are not because of a 'higher' thing, but because we know what's better for us and 'decided' that, however it's STRONGER than us, i so know that. this 'stronger than us' IS that higher power!! it's what i believe in! life is here, there, to show us.

but answering your question right away (haha) i mean, i actually always thought i was a lesbian, but if i were a guy, pretty sure i would think i was gay either xD (but i gotta admit that maybe it would have been better if i were a guy... or no?) no, thats not like that. the truth is, girls are more educated to care abou the romantic side, and guys the sexual one, unfortunately. should be the same, or recognize an asexuality or non-romantic side :).