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not_all_who_wander

Also, sitting at a campus ministry event where the speaker was talking about how everyone is faced with "sexual temptation" at our age. I remember thinking "Ummm....no?" I always hate that kind of sermon anyway because I find it awkward and think it doesn't focus on the main point of Christianity, but I was always kind of confused why it was such a big deal all the church people had to warn us about.

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Bronztrooper
40 minutes ago, not_all_who_wander said:

I'm not exactly sure if this is because I am ace, but I can never tell when someone is hitting on me. Ever. This one time a guy in our dorm tried to invite me to a speed dating event and said that "I seemed like the kind of awesome girl he'd like to meet at the event and I should come" and my brain somehow translated that as "He must be organizing the event or something and he's trying to get everyone to go. He must be short on people participating." (he wasn't) I decided I needed to finish my homework. Then about four weeks later it occurred to me that he had been leaning towards me and otherwise making flirty gestures and i guess I had rejected him without realizing it.

 

I've got some other stories like that too, but I think I miss the signals most of the time.

Enh, from what I could gather, most people have trouble picking up on whether or not someone is flirting with them, though I'd figure that aces would be especially bad at it

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SkyenAutowegCaptain

Having a conversation about Sam Smith now using gender neutral pronouns to describe themselves. I said "Well, I don't really go in for heing and sheing people anyway" 

There was a brief pause, then someone replied "that's always been the wsy with you", cue considerable laughter 

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Laplace
20 hours ago, not_all_who_wander said:

Also, sitting at a campus ministry event where the speaker was talking about how everyone is faced with "sexual temptation" at our age. I remember thinking "Ummm....no?" I always hate that kind of sermon anyway because I find it awkward and think it doesn't focus on the main point of Christianity, but I was always kind of confused why it was such a big deal all the church people had to warn us about.

I always found it amusing that I followed the “positive” moral guidelines of many religions way better than most people who actually adhered to the dogma. I don’t drink alcohol, have promiscuous sex, do drugs, cheat/commit adultery, etc. I didn’t understand how it was so hard to not do that stuff if people actually believed in their religion so fervently. Like it’s not that hard and I don’t even have the punishment of eternal damnation hanging over me to incentivize me. I thought, “Surely believers would be more pious.” Nope, guess not.

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Laplace
21 hours ago, not_all_who_wander said:

I'm not exactly sure if this is because I am ace, but I can never tell when someone is hitting on me. Ever. This one time a guy in our dorm tried to invite me to a speed dating event and said that "I seemed like the kind of awesome girl he'd like to meet at the event and I should come" and my brain somehow translated that as "He must be organizing the event or something and he's trying to get everyone to go. He must be short on people participating." (he wasn't) I decided I needed to finish my homework. Then about four weeks later it occurred to me that he had been leaning towards me and otherwise making flirty gestures and i guess I had rejected him without realizing it.

 

I've got some other stories like that too, but I think I miss the signals most of the time.

That’s exactly how I’d interpret it. To my brain, that sort of stuff sounds like general encouragement as if the person was organizing the event and trying to get people to attend, not an attempt to hit on me. I feel kinda ****ty after realizing I may have accidentally rejected someone cause I must’ve come off as super cold. Any action looks chillingly deliberate and decisive when you don’t even have the awareness necessary to pick up on and therefore deliberate over the most obvious of signals. 

 

People don’t have to be ace to be dense but I feel like my density is on another level entirely due to being ace. There’s a difference between missing some subtle hints and basically accidentally stonewalling someone who is doing nearly everything in their power short of a confession to tell you they’re available and want you at that moment like I did once.

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Darth Plagueis the Wise
On 9/16/2019 at 8:55 PM, not_all_who_wander said:

Also, sitting at a campus ministry event where the speaker was talking about how everyone is faced with "sexual temptation" at our age. I remember thinking "Ummm....no?" I always hate that kind of sermon anyway because I find it awkward and think it doesn't focus on the main point of Christianity, but I was always kind of confused why it was such a big deal all the church people had to warn us about.

I agree 110% with this sentiment. Other teens my age are mostly trying to tell me that I’m in a phase and will be like them in the future, while everyone that’s older than me is trying to tell me about how that is something that is inevitable.

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Darth Plagueis the Wise
2 hours ago, Laplace said:

That’s exactly how I’d interpret it. To my brain, that sort of stuff sounds like general encouragement as if the person was organizing the event and trying to get people to attend, not an attempt to hit on me. I feel kinda ****ty after realizing I may have accidentally rejected someone cause I must’ve come off as super cold. Any action looks chillingly deliberate and decisive when you don’t even have the awareness necessary to pick up on and therefore deliberate over the most obvious of signals. 

 

People don’t have to be ace to be dense but I feel like my density is on another level entirely due to being ace. There’s a difference between missing some subtle hints and basically accidentally stonewalling someone who is doing nearly everything in their power short of a confession to tell you they’re available and want you at that moment like I did once.

The idea of other teens being interested in sex never popped up into my mind until it became the only thing that people in my school would talk about. I once told a girl that asked me about sex that I thought that it was disgusting and her face looked like I told her that one of her siblings was brutally murdered or something. I’ve had people in my school argue with me because they thought that it was impossible to have not masturbated (at the time of that argument I wasn’t even aware of the concept of it, but merely argued because I figured that if I didn’t know why something was chances are that I hadn’t ever done it). My first year and a half of high school I was more oblivious to anything sexually related than a rock on the moon.

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Strifed

When all your friends are freaking out over a shirtless celebrity and you only care about the other group member's cute dog update

because he's cute and I wanna share LOL

Spoiler

 

I'm laughing. This happened at the concert too. Two of them went shirtless and everyone lost their mind and I was only screaming at the first guy because his stage was beautiful and I liked his dancing (and him), and the other guy I just listened to his song and chanted along with the fans 😆 I really didn't think about them being half naked and right in front of me. I know everyone is attracted to different things, but it blows my mind how mostly everyone is drooling over his body but then only a very small percent actual care about him as an artist? 👀 

 

Anyway I hope one of my friends doesn't DM me about it though because I have nothing to say ??? Besides a fake and robotic, "Oh his body is nice" Seems like my aesthetic attraction stops at the face :lol:

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BlueSpruce
On 9/16/2019 at 7:55 PM, not_all_who_wander said:

Also, sitting at a campus ministry event where the speaker was talking about how everyone is faced with "sexual temptation" at our age. I remember thinking "Ummm....no?" I always hate that kind of sermon anyway because I find it awkward and think it doesn't focus on the main point of Christianity, but I was always kind of confused why it was such a big deal all the church people had to warn us about.

I felt the same way about this. One of the leaders of my youth group gave this whole talk telling us all to dress modestly because apparently otherwise we'd be making it harder for each other to resist temptation. I really thought she was overdoing it at the time; sometimes I felt uncomfortable when people were showing a lot of skin, but it wasn't tempting or anything for me. 

 

I don't know how common it is in other churches or families, but the modesty thing actually came up a lot in mine. There was also the time this boy asked me a couple of inappropriate questions on a dare from his friends, which was super cringy, and when I told my mom she asked if I was sure it wasn't because my jeans were too tight. Which honestly made me a little mad because even if they had been, it didn't feel like it should make any difference. 

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starweb
On 9/16/2019 at 9:55 PM, not_all_who_wander said:

Also, sitting at a campus ministry event where the speaker was talking about how everyone is faced with "sexual temptation" at our age. I remember thinking "Ummm....no?" I always hate that kind of sermon anyway because I find it awkward and think it doesn't focus on the main point of Christianity, but I was always kind of confused why it was such a big deal all the church people had to warn us about.

Can relate. I always wondered why people couldn't just control themselves. I mean, I could so how hard could it be?

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AceAnimeFan

As far as ace moments go, I cant tell when someone is flirting with me to the point where I've gone on dates thinking that the guy just wanted to see a movie or eat a meal with a friend (this happened three times) and not realized until years later or until someone pointed it out to me.* 

I also don't understand a lot of jokes and when I ask for them to be explained people look at me like I've suddenly grown a second head. Once they manage to explain it in terms I understand I feel sick and horrified. 

When my parents tried to give me the "sex talk" I was sick, horrified, and would have physically run away if I hadn't thought they would have put me in therapy; the only way I got through it was by spacing out and reciting a book in my head. 

I see sex as a very violent activity.

Generally my whole life is a series of ace moments.

 

* I literally had the realization regarding the third instance as I was writing this

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Darth Plagueis the Wise
9 hours ago, BlueSpruce said:

I felt the same way about this. One of the leaders of my youth group gave this whole talk telling us all to dress modestly because apparently otherwise we'd be making it harder for each other to resist temptation. I really thought she was overdoing it at the time; sometimes I felt uncomfortable when people were showing a lot of skin, but it wasn't tempting or anything for me. 

 

I don't know how common it is in other churches or families, but the modesty thing actually came up a lot in mine. There was also the time this boy asked me a couple of inappropriate questions on a dare from his friends, which was super cringy, and when I told my mom she asked if I was sure it wasn't because my jeans were too tight. Which honestly made me a little mad because even if they had been, it didn't feel like it should make any difference. 

I remember my middle school being like that. I remember my school getting everyone into one room and telling the girls “boys aren’t hugging you to be hugging you”, 5 years later and I still have no clue why they were meaning with that (I’m a guy and I like hugging people that I know). My 8th grade US history teacher spent the last day of school giving a bunch of advice to my class, half of which was him telling the girls in my class that guys are stupid and to not waste time on us. In my experience, I have the opposite reaction to girls wearing clothes that show a lot of skin to what seems to be expected (I’d prefer to be looking at a blank wall than having part of a girl’s boobs or legs even in my peripheral vision).

 

I remember about a year ago complaining about how a lot of girls in my school where shorts that are so short that they can wear a slightly long t-shirt that barely reaches their thighs and you can’t see their shorts. The response that I got back was “what’s supposed to be wrong with that?”.

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nerdperson777

The other day I was driving and my eyes locked onto a child that was walking on the sidewalk with family.  I realized that they were wearing ace colors.

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Poe's Creep Meta

I think I'm understanding something about holes in trousers right now. 

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Laplace
On 9/18/2019 at 7:56 PM, Darth Plagueis the Wise said:

I remember my middle school being like that. I remember my school getting everyone into one room and telling the girls “boys aren’t hugging you to be hugging you”, 5 years later and I still have no clue why they were meaning with that (I’m a guy and I like hugging people that I know). My 8th grade US history teacher spent the last day of school giving a bunch of advice to my class, half of which was him telling the girls in my class that guys are stupid and to not waste time on us. In my experience, I have the opposite reaction to girls wearing clothes that show a lot of skin to what seems to be expected (I’d prefer to be looking at a blank wall than having part of a girl’s boobs or legs even in my peripheral vision).

 

I remember about a year ago complaining about how a lot of girls in my school where shorts that are so short that they can wear a slightly long t-shirt that barely reaches their thighs and you can’t see their shorts. The response that I got back was “what’s supposed to be wrong with that?”.

I feel like I just have this occasional knee-jerk negative reaction to too much skin being shown due to playing so many video games and watching so many shows. For character designs, I often find myself thinking that too much skin was a cheap, lazy way to make a character seem more appealing on a very basic level. I just find more more modest outfits more interesting.

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Arodash
1 hour ago, PoeciMeta said:

I think I'm understanding something about holes in trousers right now. 

What do you mean?

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Bronztrooper
2 hours ago, Laplace said:

I feel like I just have this occasional knee-jerk negative reaction to too much skin being shown due to playing so many video games and watching so many shows. For character designs, I often find myself thinking that too much skin was a cheap, lazy way to make a character seem more appealing on a very basic level. I just find more more modest outfits more interesting.

The way I think about it is whether or not the outfit makes sense for the character in question.  If the character is a 'I do what I want' kind of character that doesn't really care about what others think, then a revealing outfit may be in character for them.  But if they're a very conservative/shy/introverted character, a revealing outfit would not be in character and I'll be pretty annoyed about it.

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Strange_Charms
On 9/14/2019 at 10:14 PM, Darth Plagueis the Wise said:

“Bedroom Eyes”? That’s a real thing?

Apparently mate, it's news to me

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Firefly8

#SexWithAnExIn3Words is trending on twitter...

I can't relate
No sex/ex
 

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laokatok

I went to my city's Oktoberfest yesterday and the band played a song that goes something like "I'm single, I'm single, I'm single, I don't give a fck about it". Highlight of the day.😂

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nerdperson777

This was a few weeks ago.  The agender person I knew was having their last day around before going to Europe for grad school.  This girl and I were waiting outside for them.  Lately she's been upping the dirty jokes.  I jokingly peered through the crack in the double doors.  She joked that I was a Peeping Tom and it took me a few seconds before I said, "wait a minute..."

 

Next on the odd sexual stories with energy people, the guy said that the universe must be giving him trials by putting all those attractive women there, especially while he's working.  Instead of giving into the temptation, he says to think of anime.  The girl agreed to that is what she does.  So they're thinking about dirty anime.  And there I was thinking all those pervy anime was only watched by people who only look at anime for the sex and aren't actually anime lovers.

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Laplace
On 9/14/2019 at 8:14 PM, Darth Plagueis the Wise said:

“Bedroom Eyes”? That’s a real thing?

 

12 hours ago, Strange_Charms said:

Apparently mate, it's news to me

Everyone else’s definition of bedroom eyes: 😏😉😚

My definition: 😴😴😴

 

I have a very literal interpretation. If I’m going to bed, I’m closing my eyes and going to sleep. 🙃

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fooledbysecrecy
1 hour ago, Laplace said:

 

Everyone else’s definition of bedroom eyes: 😏😉😚

My definition: 😴😴😴

 

I have a very literal interpretation. If I’m going to bed, I’m closing my eyes and going to sleep. 🙃

lmao exactly!

i'd say i'm very good in bed, today i even napped a few hours on top of the normal night's sleep.

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SkyenAutowegCaptain

The incident wasn't incredibly ace, but the wording was. Our bartender was paying for attention to Bake Off than a customer, and I said "The trouble is that you're being hypnotised by cakes" 

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Arodash

Im considering this an Ace moment. Lol

 

Everyone I drive a Jeep wrangler JK and shes honestly the only girl I need in my life but! She needs a name. I cant decide between

 

Stella, a latin word for star and its just honestly a beautiful name, and travelers have used the stars to guide them for generations

 

Or

 

Curie, after Marie Curie the first scientist to win two nobel prizes and advanced the field of radiological science and shes a personal hero

 

Any other suggestions are welcome! 

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Barbio

I just learned (in a very graphic way) what "scissors" represent in lesbian culture... You know, you could have just said "it's a lesbian sex pose" and that would have been enough to settle my curiosity; you really didn't need to go into detail.

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Poe's Creep Meta

Gazing at a weird ad about ''technology bringing people together'' and not getting what that could be (I thought of a phone, maybe?), then realising it was about condoms and turning back, somewhat disgusted. I didn't even immediately connect the dots with just the guys kissing on the ad. 

I'll stop writing about it now, I don't want to think about it too much. 

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cp1213

When you realized that flowers engage in sexual reproduction more often than you do lol.

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Bronztrooper

Went go-karting last weekend and saw one girl wearing a tube top (I think that's what it was, at least) and another wearing a shirt that only went over 1 shoulder and all I could think of was how they were supposed to put that stuff on or hang it up in the closet.

 

Those kinds of tops confuse me, tbh

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Firefly8
31 minutes ago, Bronztrooper said:

Went go-karting last weekend and saw one girl wearing a tube top (I think that's what it was, at least) and another wearing a shirt that only went over 1 shoulder and all I could think of was how they were supposed to put that stuff on or hang it up in the closet.

 

Those kinds of tops confuse me, tbh

Asexual moment: when I have to really think for a minute how this story relates to being asexual because they really would be hard to hang in a closet.

I thought about which dresser drawer I would put a folded tube top into if I had one and that a one shoulder top would probably have a hidden tiny loop of ribbon to hang it up with like some dresses have... then thinking I must know this because I'm a girl.... but how would typical male/female differences relate to asexual?.....  .... .... oh, men usually are attracted to how women look in those things 💡.... maybe I've never owned those tops because I don't really care if men find me "attractive"....? 🤔

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