AVENCakes Posted June 13, 2009 Share Posted June 13, 2009 I am married to an asexual, with kids. Rather than divorce, I have an affair. This decision is not for everyone, but it has worked well for us. I thought you said you had a DADT situation- so your wife is fully aware and consenting to the possibility of you going elsewhere for sex, etc, she just doesn't know the details. (that's how you described it in an earlier post) Unless you're misrepresenting the case and your wife isn't aware about what's going on but you're convincing yourself that she is and has given "unspoken consent" to the situation- it sounds like you worked it out so that you've got a situation everyone's agreed to. That's not an affair. An affair isn't going elsewhere for sex/emotional connection/whatever- it's lying about it and breaking the rules in doing so. While I wouldn't entirely call your situation polyamory- I'm fully amenable to poly, swinging, and general responsible non-monogamy. There's a difference between communicating, hearing your partner's concerns/wants/needs while having yours be heard, and setting up an agreement so that you are able to do those things knowing that you're partner(s) is/are fine iwth the situation and an affair. It's possible to cheat in poly- and it's just as bad as cheating in a monogamous relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
kat_xk8 Posted February 6, 2011 Share Posted February 6, 2011 Sex is why I will never marry due to a medical condition I will always have - I have no libido Just the idea of sex traumatizes me Sex seems to be the focal point of marriages Sex is something I resent big time It's the hurdle that can't be overcome yet I have no desire to Then again it's not a hurdle to me just one society put there and I kicked it no threw it out of my way Sex is not normal to me and never will be I don't have a reproductive system due to birth defect Mu gosh - it's called commitment If I ever married - has to be to another asexual who never warts sex End a marriage over sex I myself wont ever marry if there would be sex - even a slight chance Sex is why I will never marry It's my life I'm supposed to want sex - I don't!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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