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Da Chicken or da egg?


rayser

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HI Peace. I am also new here.

I seem to be constantly on the watch out for that "perfect" companion/partner. You know someone you can sit in a room with, at opposite ends, reading different books with quiet music playing and be completely comfortable with just being there, comfortable with the productive silence. That is a rare find.

And then when quiet time has naturally come to a close, discussion, talking is what I love.

HI JojoDay! Sounds like you are looking for the same perfect companion I am looking for. But when the discussion time comes, eventually there would be an argument, because none of us can be a perfect companion - haha! Still, I love reading quietly in a room with someone else. I used to do it with my youngest daughter until she grew up and realized Mom was superfluous.

Hey, I've noticed I don't attract friends who like to do what I do - what's up with that? I guess the readers are all hiding behind their books. Come out, come, wherever you are!

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if we are wired so to speak to experience varying degrees of discomfort ranging from uneasiness to outright horror over exchanging body fluids why are we driven to seek companionship?

probably because most primates are herd animals - we're programmed to survive as members working within a group, not alone. Loners and stragglers will be picked off by predators. So for our own survival we do need a crowd around us. Not all people "should" reproduce for various reasons, though, even if we manage to do a good job with the kids we do bring into this world in spite of not being wired for it, and I am wondering if maybe there is something like that going on. I couldn't help but be struck on that one other thread how many asexuals don't like children that much. A very high percentage relatively speaking compared to sexuals. This would fit in with the hypothesis.

There are all sorts of niches in human society for non-reproducing people (which taken to an extreme is what asexuality would lead to - a society that doesn't replenish itself, right?), but we won't exactly be smack in the center of things or "leaders" I don't think. In a simpler society maybe we could be shepherds or guards at lonely outposts or medicine women or shamans or something "on the fringes".

Your reply forced me to oil up the rusty ole grey matter tween my ears!! A pure asexual society!! brings a tear to my eye!! Assuming, of course, the books on improbability of anything absolute or pure are tossed out the window, it is a very interesting hypothesis, however if this fantasy group were determined not just to survive but prosper, reproduction would have to happen, so I would predict offspring by test tube or in vitro carried by female volunteers.

And if every one were AS, feelings of deviating from the norm would no longer exist!!

Regarding the comment on AS *occupations* lowly and on the fringe, I disagree. I do not believe one's sexual orientation detrimentally impacts dreams, aspirations and goals, mental disabilities not withstanding. Yes, it would be NICE ( sigh) to have someone to share it with, but, myself personally, shall still persevere!!

Many Aspergers people as well here I have noticed. They have positive traits and skills that benefit human society, yes, but you don't want human societies made up largely of Aspies because some basic things of existence would not get done.

It's about the survival of the species after all and the evolution of traits that perpetuate survival. Altruism and the "selfish gene" etc.

This statement blows me away!! I never considered humans BORN with selfish inclinations, nor pettiness, or a bevy of other traits, but the evolution thing got me really thinking!! so many new and thought sparking topics in your reply!! I won't hijack them, they're all yours, but please consider putting them out in the general forum, should make for lively reading if nothing else!! ^_^

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