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Da Chicken or da egg?


rayser

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k peeps time to chum these asexual waters. Newly discovering my true relationship preference, revelation equivalent to the Big Bang of all creation, and grappling with a tsunami of equally spankin new emotions, probalities and consequences, I have reached a most interesting hypothesis in my thinking ( and I thinks alot!!) a condundrum actually, cause I am never satisfied with because something is so, I have to know why!! Is asexuality a selective desire or the result of inherent programming? ie genetics, designed to kick off during certain experiences in our respective lifetimes? and sub topic, if we are wired so to speak to experience varying degrees of discomfort ranging from uneasiness to outright horror over exchanging body fluids why are we driven to seek companionship? Propogation of the species is obviously definitely a no factor, even after all the so called equipment goes rusty. Is validation of variation from the so called norm really a life or death matter? cuz I got to tell ya, quite a few of these youngun's stories of being alone forever are heartbreaking!! Answers? But one request. Include religious beliefs only IF!! they have been pivotal in your decision, cuz stripping away all the devotion and adulation, all religion is based on a single principle, spreading the Word to other believers, but asexuals don't willingly propogate, therefore few believers to embrace the faith, get it?

And last, puhleeze!! don't paddle daintily or fearfully in shark infested waters!! dive in head first with a Ghiradelli dark chocolate bar clenched in one hand and glass of Red Ass Rhubarb wine in the other and make like their favorite prey!! ;) PS apology to those old eyes for large print.

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smellincoffee

I think asexuality just a genetic fluke, myself, and a 'status' that can result from a variety of things going not the way they should. I say "not the way they should", because we're basically here to propagate genes and we're not doing it. :lol: I don't think asexuality is something "wrong" that has to be fixed, though.

As for companionship...who knows? We're social animals, so that has a lot to do with it. We're also raised in sexual cultures, all of us, and there's really no escaping that. Even if someone is not interested in having a companion, they still can't escape the culture. There's guaranteed to be some baggage somewhere.

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I think asexuality just a genetic fluke, myself, and a 'status' that can result from a variety of things going not the way they should. I say "not the way they should", because we're basically here to propagate genes and we're not doing it. :lol: I don't think asexuality is something "wrong" that has to be fixed, though.

As for companionship...who knows? We're social animals, so that has a lot to do with it. We're also raised in sexual cultures, all of us, and there's really no escaping that. Even if someone is not interested in having a companion, they still can't escape the culture. There's guaranteed to be some baggage somewhere.

Agree, our cultures, irregardless of geography can be very sexually persuasive, if not dominant, but, excluding barebulb torture and brainwashing, does the majority of humanity retain the exclusive right to accept/reject those sexual concepts? By the way, I failed the book test on computer for dummies, so if this isn't the right location for a reply, I apologize. :unsure:

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k peeps time to chum these asexual waters. Newly discovering my true relationship preference, revelation equivalent to the Big Bang of all creation, and grappling with a tsunami of equally spankin new emotions, probalities and consequences, I have reached a most interesting hypothesis in my thinking ( and I thinks alot!!) a condundrum actually, cause I am never satisfied with because something is so, I have to know why!! Is asexuality a selective desire or the result of inherent programming? ie genetics, designed to kick off during certain experiences in our respective lifetimes? and sub topic, if we are wired so to speak to experience varying degrees of discomfort ranging from uneasiness to outright horror over exchanging body fluids why are we driven to seek companionship? Propogation of the species is obviously definitely a no factor, even after all the so called equipment goes rusty. Is validation of variation from the so called norm really a life or death matter? cuz I got to tell ya, quite a few of these youngun's stories of being alone forever are heartbreaking!! Answers? But one request. Include religious beliefs only IF!! they have been pivotal in your decision, cuz stripping away all the devotion and adulation, all religion is based on a single principle, spreading the Word to other believers, but asexuals don't willingly propogate, therefore few believers to embrace the faith, get it?

And last, puhleeze!! don't paddle daintily or fearfully in shark infested waters!! dive in head first with a Ghiradelli dark chocolate bar clenched in one hand and glass of Red Ass Rhubarb wine in the other and make like their favorite prey!! ;) PS apology to those old eyes for large print.

I think, though, you're using 'asexual' to describe a person and that can't be. It's just part of who that person is. It's kind of like they have on telly "That Seventies Show" but they don't take into consideration that the seventies were a decade, it wasn't a year. So they try to cram all the things that happened in the seventies into one box. It doesn't fit. The bedroom of a teenager in 1971 looked totally different from the bedroom of a teenager in 1979. Hair, clothing, attitudes etc, none of them lasted for 10 years.

So it's the same with asexuality. Asexuals don't experience sexual attraction. Many of them seek companions because they want a family so the train of thought of 'asexuals don't willingly propogate' is way too general. There are many people here who willingly propogated (and yeah, I'm not really interested in the feedback of those who hate their children). There are asexuals at either end of the spectrum. Some end up without a partner (I'm not going to say 'alone' because if someone is totally 'alone' they might want to check out the vibes they're sending out that even dogs won't stay with them) because they want to, others because they're too set in their ways to change. Some end up with children they hate, others end up with children they love, others have no children at all by choice or circumstance.

All religion is not meant to spread the word to other believers. A lot of the churches encourage it but a person's own religion/belief isn't based on that. My relationship with God isn't meant to be spread, it's meant for me. And I do truly believe that God made me this way on purpose. I didn't know anything about the bible and St. Paul or any of it (I'm not Christian anyway) saying it was okay and don't really care because it's not a book about God it's a book about man's interpretation of God and anyone can write that.

Sexual attraction was just a feature that my model didn't get, just like I can't whistle and I can barely do simple math. It's just something about me that was put there.

People use a lot of food analogy here and I hate it but I'm going to use one. I can't have tomato, I get very sick. I don't hate tomato, life would be much easier if I could eat tomato but it's not worth the pain so everything I eat has to be scrutinised, labels have to be read, knives have to be washed, I don't even touch raw vegetables on salad bars in fear of the wrong tongs having been used, nothin'. So...how do I eat spaghetti, pizza and lasagne? Alfredo sauce of course. It's not that it's not 'real' spaghetti or 'real' pizza without tomato sauce, it's just a different kind and more suited to my make up. Mustard is better on fries than ketchup anyway.

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Sexual attraction was just a feature that my model didn't get, just like I can't whistle and I can barely do simple math. It's just something about me that was put there.

Hmm. I can't whistle or do math either. I wonder...

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Sexual attraction was just a feature that my model didn't get, just like I can't whistle and I can barely do simple math. It's just something about me that was put there.

Hmm. I can't whistle or do math either. I wonder...

LOL, sorry to blow the theory but I can whistle, math is a bit shaky tho

I truly think I was always wired this way, but didn't know one could be until I found here recently, so tended to blame it on other factors/experiences. The two things that make me think I am wired this way are a) when I look back over my fantasies about relationships as a virgin, they were all about emotional stuff and sex didn't come into them, whereas my friends were definitely focused on getting some and b) I had an experience when my first marriage was falling apart and I fell very heavily for someone else, and when I plucked up courage to say "I think I love you", the person replied with "Oh, you mean you want to go to bed with me?" and I was genuinely surprised and taken aback, because truth be told, I hadn't thought about that at all.....

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k peeps time to chum these asexual waters. Newly discovering my true relationship preference, revelation equivalent to the Big Bang of all creation, and grappling with a tsunami of equally spankin new emotions, probalities and consequences, I have reached a most interesting hypothesis in my thinking ( and I thinks alot!!) a condundrum actually, cause I am never satisfied with because something is so, I have to know why!! Is asexuality a selective desire or the result of inherent programming? ie genetics, designed to kick off during certain experiences in our respective lifetimes? and sub topic, if we are wired so to speak to experience varying degrees of discomfort ranging from uneasiness to outright horror over exchanging body fluids why are we driven to seek companionship? Propogation of the species is obviously definitely a no factor, even after all the so called equipment goes rusty. Is validation of variation from the so called norm really a life or death matter? cuz I got to tell ya, quite a few of these youngun's stories of being alone forever are heartbreaking!! Answers? But one request. Include religious beliefs only IF!! they have been pivotal in your decision, cuz stripping away all the devotion and adulation, all religion is based on a single principle, spreading the Word to other believers, but asexuals don't willingly propogate, therefore few believers to embrace the faith, get it?

And last, puhleeze!! don't paddle daintily or fearfully in shark infested waters!! dive in head first with a Ghiradelli dark chocolate bar clenched in one hand and glass of Red Ass Rhubarb wine in the other and make like their favorite prey!! ;) PS apology to those old eyes for large print.

I think, though, you're using 'asexual' to describe a person and that can't be. It's just part of who that person is. It's kind of like they have on telly "That Seventies Show" but they don't take into consideration that the seventies were a decade, it wasn't a year. So they try to cram all the things that happened in the seventies into one box. It doesn't fit. The bedroom of a teenager in 1971 looked totally different from the bedroom of a teenager in 1979. Hair, clothing, attitudes etc, none of them lasted for 10 years.

So it's the same with asexuality. Asexuals don't experience sexual attraction. Many of them seek companions because they want a family so the train of thought of 'asexuals don't willingly propogate' is way too general. There are many people here who willingly propogated (and yeah, I'm not really interested in the feedback of those who hate their children). There are asexuals at either end of the spectrum. Some end up without a partner (I'm not going to say 'alone' because if someone is totally 'alone' they might want to check out the vibes they're sending out that even dogs won't stay with them) because they want to, others because they're too set in their ways to change. Some end up with children they hate, others end up with children they love, others have no children at all by choice or circumstance.

All religion is not meant to spread the word to other believers. A lot of the churches encourage it but a person's own religion/belief isn't based on that. My relationship with God isn't meant to be spread, it's meant for me. And I do truly believe that God made me this way on purpose. I didn't know anything about the bible and St. Paul or any of it (I'm not Christian anyway) saying it was okay and don't really care because it's not a book about God it's a book about man's interpretation of God and anyone can write that.

Sexual attraction was just a feature that my model didn't get, just like I can't whistle and I can barely do simple math. It's just something about me that was put there.

People use a lot of food analogy here and I hate it but I'm going to use one. I can't have tomato, I get very sick. I don't hate tomato, life would be much easier if I could eat tomato but it's not worth the pain so everything I eat has to be scrutinised, labels have to be read, knives have to be washed, I don't even touch raw vegetables on salad bars in fear of the wrong tongs having been used, nothin'. So...how do I eat spaghetti, pizza and lasagne? Alfredo sauce of course. It's not that it's not 'real' spaghetti or 'real' pizza without tomato sauce, it's just a different kind and more suited to my make up. Mustard is better on fries than ketchup anyway.

I purposely left the go forth and multiply!! aspect *open* for generation of different viewpoints from anyone irregardless of age, and should have posted this topic on the general page, but as the older asexual categories popped up first, and laziness overwhelmed me, I let it go, but harken!! male/female, young and old!! gender specific, or unhh not sure, jump in!! the water's just fine!!

Exclusion of religion was pondered, ( for about as long as a good yawn) then the decision made to sever all lifelines...oh look!! here comes a megladon!!...eliminate one's attempt to attribute their sexual orientation to their religious preferences, ie environmental influence. I also wish to remain, momentarily, silent ( anyone who knows me is now groaning loudly!!) k, minute's up!! I believe I am a what before a who. My morals, ethics, belief systems internal stuff define what fashions me, WHO is molded by my environment, both external, where people live plays a major role in their development, emotionally and physically, and internally, ie social structure, family, friends etc.

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je_suis_napoleon

I'm not so sure that reproduction is the only force behind the human need for companionship. Primates, and especially humans, are very vulnerable in the wild. Community and social living are what has protected us and made us able to fend off predators. E pluribus unum and all that rot.

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I'm not so sure that reproduction is the only force behind the human need for companionship. Primates, and especially humans, are very vulnerable in the wild. Community and social living are what has protected us and made us able to fend off predators. E pluribus unum and all that rot.

Agree with Napoleon. We are a social animal...chimps with higher brains (somewhat higher brains...maybe not higher, just more complex). Sex enables reproduction but we (sexuals, at least) don't experience the sex/social drive as the need to reproduce; that's overlaid with all sorts of physical and emotional feelings.

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Thanks all for the great insights!! Though I consider myself a raving genius, emphasis on raving!! tis a physical impossibility to conjure every answer!! But guys!! weigh in too!! else we ladies will think ya chicken!! no offense, smellin the coffee and omnistpriest!! I want a new emoticon!! Chocolate!! will have to figure out how to import a dancing c-bar!!

Clarification of companionship: the relationship you personally seek to fulfill/complete the inner you, not the congregation of humanity for survival, that's pretty much a given, although lately with my so called nest egg being cracked open and fried before my very eyes, I am pondering the wisdom of relocating to a deserted isle, eating bat guano and,...oh..wait, that's been done least on the silver screen!!

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As I read the opening scenerio for this thread a notion popped into my little head.

What "IF" asexuality is nothing more than Nature's means of population control?

The reason this popped into my head is I was thinking about Jurassic Park the movie. As I remember they used the DNA of frogs to supplement the missing DNA of the dinasours which worked until Nature decided there were too many of one gender and used the ability of frogs to change gender and reproduce more dinosaurs.

Long way around to get to the barn. Sorry,

But I had to set this up somehow. :rolleyes:

"So", If nature can change frogs from male to female and female to male to control the population of frogs so they don't overuse their habitat, is it possible that nature is doing something similar with humans. Changing some of us just enough so the sexiness isn't active in us and thus reducing some of that progreation that was mentioned at the outset of this thread?

Just a random thought that went wizzing through my head and now its out the other side and gone.

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As I read the opening scenerio for this thread a notion popped into my little head.

What "IF" asexuality is nothing more than Nature's means of population control?

The reason this popped into my head is I was thinking about Jurassic Park the movie. As I remember they used the DNA of frogs to supplement the missing DNA of the dinasours which worked until Nature decided there were too many of one gender and used the ability of frogs to change gender and reproduce more dinosaurs.

Long way around to get to the barn. Sorry,

But I had to set this up somehow. :rolleyes:

"So", If nature can change frogs from male to female and female to male to control the population of frogs so they don't overuse their habitat, is it possible that nature is doing something similar with humans. Changing some of us just enough so the sexiness isn't active in us and thus reducing some of that progreation that was mentioned at the outset of this thread?

Just a random thought that went wizzing through my head and now its out the other side and gone.

That would be an amazing hypothesis to prove!! right up there with, since a true asexual experiences NO attraction, and never would, why then, do the majority of women seek, long for etc, males for companionship and not their own gender? ditto for males? OOPS this could be another topic!! :D
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The key to answering your question, rayser, is that asexuals experience no sexual attraction.

Emotional attraction is another thing altogether, and it seems pretty common for female AVENites to long for companionship with those who have male personalities, and vice versa. Since childhood we are programmed to expect the sex of the body and that of the personality to match, which they do in the vast majority of cases, so it is a logical response for most asexuals to want companionship with the opposite sex.

It could be an interesting study, although I suspect it might run afoul of a few members who are in denial about the reality of the more common sex and gender-based personality differences.

A curious thing that I have noticed is that the percentage of AVENites who identify as gender variants, ie: androgynous to varying degrees or even transgendered, is FAR above the population average.

On an androgyny based website that I saw years ago - long before asexuality became as well known as it is now - it mentioned how a larger than average number of androgynous people were more or less asexual, and they theorized that it was because that old "opposites attract" phenomena wasn't in effect with people who have no opposite gender.

I can't say for sure either way, but I know that it rings true for ME, and I think it would be an interesting research project if an accurate method of studying it could be determined.

-GB

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That would be an amazing hypothesis to prove!! right up there with, since a true asexual experiences NO attraction, and never would, why then, do the majority of women seek, long for etc, males for companionship and not their own gender? ditto for males? OOPS this could be another topic!! :D

Exactly. And its juz that a hypothesis. Not something that I personally believe, juz a random thought that popped in from nowhere.

But as for the other comment:

"since a true asexual experiences NO attraction"

As Bird so nicely put:

That we all know is false.

We all have attractions. I personally am attracted to everything chocolate. :rolleyes:

And on occassion am attracted to a person for one reason or another. When that happens it's like magnatism. I can't take my eyes off them and can't stop thinking about them. I want more than anything to introduce myself and get to know who they are and everything about them. It don't happen often but when it does it is a very strong attraction.

BUT! It isn't sexual in no way, shape or form. I don't get the "Hots" for them or anything like that.

Asexuals as much as I understand do have attractions, just not Sexual attractions. So wanting someone for a companion is as normal as breathing. Neither breathing nor companionship are sexual in nature. We are social beings. Even myself, as much of a loner as I am, and I could run for President of the Hermits Society and win hands down, do like one-on-one conversations and the company, athough limited, with another human being from time to time.

Wanting, even desiring, companionship doesn't make anyone sexual. Just means they don't want to be alone. :D

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I could run for President of the Hermits Society and win hands down. :D

LOL Ziffler, BUT, I wonder how many of us would leave our Caves to participate in the Vote? :D

If I were to (and I would undoubtedly Vote for you!), you would probably win 1 - Nil.

A ........ Hand Down ....... win, none the less! :D

I'm not so sure that reproduction is the only force behind the human need for companionship.

Indeed, ...

sharing sunrises & sunsets, the moon-light shimmering on a lake, movies, theatre ... theatre (sigh)

playing chess, cards, backgammon, ...

scrabble, as a solo game, ... I find remarkably underwhelming.

Cooking for one is a bore and a chore.

Eating without companionship is, mostly, merely functionary.

I'm sure I can say this on the OFF (Old Fogies Forum) ...

"Fuck" Sex! ... It's the other shared experiences I miss. :(

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That would be an amazing hypothesis to prove!! right up there with, since a true asexual experiences NO attraction, and never would, why then, do the majority of women seek, long for etc, males for companionship and not their own gender? ditto for males? OOPS this could be another topic!! :D

Exactly. And its juz that a hypothesis. Not something that I personally believe, juz a random thought that popped in from nowhere.

But as for the other comment:

"since a true asexual experiences NO attraction"

As Bird so nicely put:

That we all know is false.

We all have attractions. I personally am attracted to everything chocolate. :rolleyes:

And on occassion am attracted to a person for one reason or another. When that happens it's like magnatism. I can't take my eyes off them and can't stop thinking about them. I want more than anything to introduce myself and get to know who they are and everything about them. It don't happen often but when it does it is a very strong attraction.

BUT! It isn't sexual in no way, shape or form. I don't get the "Hots" for them or anything like that.

Asexuals as much as I understand do have attractions, just not Sexual attractions. So wanting someone for a companion is as normal as breathing. Neither breathing nor companionship are sexual in nature. We are social beings. Even myself, as much of a loner as I am, and I could run for President of the Hermits Society and win hands down, do like one-on-one conversations and the company, athough limited, with another human being from time to time.

Wanting, even desiring, companionship doesn't make anyone sexual. Just means they don't want to be alone. :D

Ziff, I believe that *magnetism* is termed Charisma and I believe we are *attracted to that quality in certain individuals because it is unique, fairly rare, sometimes hypnotic and deep down we wish WE had it!! Chocolate eh? Please tell me NOT milk, no charisma there!! :lol:
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I could run for President of the Hermits Society and win hands down. :D

LOL Ziffler, BUT, I wonder how many of us would leave our Caves to participate in the Vote? :D

If I were to (and I would undoubtedly Vote for you!), you would probably win 1 - Nil.

A ........ Hand Down ....... win, none the less! :D

I'm not so sure that reproduction is the only force behind the human need for companionship.

Indeed, ...

sharing sunrises & sunsets, the moon-light shimmering on a lake, movies, theatre ... theatre (sigh)

playing chess, cards, backgammon, ...

scrabble, as a solo game, ... I find remarkably underwhelming.

Cooking for one is a bore and a chore.

Eating without companionship is, mostly, merely functionary.

I'm sure I can say this on the OFF (Old Fogies Forum) ...

"Fuck" Sex! ... It's the other shared experiences I miss. :(

Just curious, what varieties of movies do you like?

:)

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I'm new here, but old, well, old enough I suppose to be on this older asexual forum. I was delighted to find it, and the conversation is very interesting. I hope I can remember how I found it. I just wanted to say that many of the problems we encounter are the same or parallel in nature to other people's relationships. It's just all part of being human - we misunderrstand each other. have agendas we impose on others (sometimes conscious, sometimes not), come with our own set of expectations, baggage, damage, etc., which we somehow try to have understood by someone else, often failing, sometimes succeeding. It's just hard to be human, period. But, sometimes, something "clicks", maybe just for a moment, and we feel connected, accepted, loved. Those are the moments we all keep living for.

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I'm new here, but old, well, old enough I suppose to be on this older asexual forum. I was delighted to find it, and the conversation is very interesting. I hope I can remember how I found it. I just wanted to say that many of the problems we encounter are the same or parallel in nature to other people's relationships. It's just all part of being human - we misunderstand each other. have agendas we impose on others (sometimes conscious, sometimes not), come with our own set of expectations, baggage, damage, etc., which we somehow try to have understood by someone else, often failing, sometimes succeeding. It's just hard to be human, period. But, sometimes, something "clicks", maybe just for a moment, and we feel connected, accepted, loved. Those are the moments we all keep living for.

Welcome to AVEN, peace, :) truly a place to "feel connected, accepted, loved".

I hope you threw out a trail of breadcrumbs so's you can find your way back ...

That's one reason we always give plenty of :cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake:

to newcomers on the Boards :D

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Anyone for a chicken omelette ?
Don't take this offensively, but with your eggceptional wit and dis parate sense of humor, ya just gotta rename yourself Old Man of the Mountain :lol:
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I'm new here, but old, well, old enough I suppose to be on this older asexual forum. I was delighted to find it, and the conversation is very interesting. I hope I can remember how I found it. I just wanted to say that many of the problems we encounter are the same or parallel in nature to other people's relationships. It's just all part of being human - we misunderstand each other. have agendas we impose on others (sometimes conscious, sometimes not), come with our own set of expectations, baggage, damage, etc., which we somehow try to have understood by someone else, often failing, sometimes succeeding. It's just hard to be human, period. But, sometimes, something "clicks", maybe just for a moment, and we feel connected, accepted, loved. Those are the moments we all keep living for.

Welcome to AVEN, peace, :) truly a place to "feel connected, accepted, loved".

I hope you threw out a trail of breadcrumbs so's you can find your way back ...

That's one reason we always give plenty of :cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake:

to newcomers on the Boards :D

Wow. Peace you truly touched my heart and I am NOT being sarcastic, Shaggy, but echoes his greeting, though breadcumbs will only keep you existing you need chocolate, the darker the better to LIVE!! welcome and I'm sure you will find friends here, I have!! :) :) :cake::cake::cake:
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HI Peace. I am also new here.

I seem to be constantly on the watch out for that "perfect" companion/partner. You know someone you can sit in a room with, at opposite ends, reading different books with quiet music playing and be completely comfortable with just being there, comfortable with the productive silence. That is a rare find.

And then when quiet time has naturally come to a close, discussion, talking is what I love.

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  • 2 weeks later...
cozy n. bizzy
if we are wired so to speak to experience varying degrees of discomfort ranging from uneasiness to outright horror over exchanging body fluids why are we driven to seek companionship?

probably because most primates are herd animals - we're programmed to survive as members working within a group, not alone. Loners and stragglers will be picked off by predators. So for our own survival we do need a crowd around us. Not all people "should" reproduce for various reasons, though, even if we manage to do a good job with the kids we do bring into this world in spite of not being wired for it, and I am wondering if maybe there is something like that going on. I couldn't help but be struck on that one other thread how many asexuals don't like children that much. A very high percentage relatively speaking compared to sexuals. This would fit in with the hypothesis. There are all sorts of niches in human society for non-reproducing people (which taken to an extreme is what asexuality would lead to - a society that doesn't replenish itself, right?), but we won't exactly be smack in the center of things or "leaders" I don't think. In a simpler society maybe we could be shepherds or guards at lonely outposts or medicine women or shamans or something "on the fringes". Many Aspergers people as well here I have noticed. They have positive traits and skills that benefit human society, yes, but you don't want human societies made up largely of Aspies because some basic things of existence would not get done. It's about the survival of the species after all and the evolution of traits that perpetuate survival. Altruism and the "selfish gene" etc.

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I'm new here, but old, well, old enough I suppose to be on this older asexual forum. I was delighted to find it, and the conversation is very interesting. I hope I can remember how I found it. I just wanted to say that many of the problems we encounter are the same or parallel in nature to other people's relationships. It's just all part of being human - we misunderstand each other. have agendas we impose on others (sometimes conscious, sometimes not), come with our own set of expectations, baggage, damage, etc., which we somehow try to have understood by someone else, often failing, sometimes succeeding. It's just hard to be human, period. But, sometimes, something "clicks", maybe just for a moment, and we feel connected, accepted, loved. Those are the moments we all keep living for.

Welcome to AVEN, peace, :) truly a place to "feel connected, accepted, loved".

I hope you threw out a trail of breadcrumbs so's you can find your way back ...

That's one reason we always give plenty of :cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake:

to newcomers on the Boards :D

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:rolleyes:

I'm new here, but old, well, old enough I suppose to be on this older asexual forum. I was delighted to find it, and the conversation is very interesting. I hope I can remember how I found it. I just wanted to say that many of the problems we encounter are the same or parallel in nature to other people's relationships. It's just all part of being human - we misunderstand each other. have agendas we impose on others (sometimes conscious, sometimes not), come with our own set of expectations, baggage, damage, etc., which we somehow try to have understood by someone else, often failing, sometimes succeeding. It's just hard to be human, period. But, sometimes, something "clicks", maybe just for a moment, and we feel connected, accepted, loved. Those are the moments we all keep living for.

Welcome to AVEN, peace, :) truly a place to "feel connected, accepted, loved".

I hope you threw out a trail of breadcrumbs so's you can find your way back ...

That's one reason we always give plenty of :cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake:

to newcomers on the Boards :D

Hi Shaggy, and thank you very much for your welcome. I didn't throw out a trail of breadcrumbs, and almost couldn't find my way back. It's tricky for me to maneuver websites, and it took me forty-five minutes just to find my own post and replies! I looooooooooove cake. I actually have a relationship with cake. Cake and I go back a long way...I remember our first times together... ^_^

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I'm new here, but old, well, old enough I suppose to be on this older asexual forum. I was delighted to find it, and the conversation is very interesting. I hope I can remember how I found it. I just wanted to say that many of the problems we encounter are the same or parallel in nature to other people's relationships. It's just all part of being human - we misunderstand each other. have agendas we impose on others (sometimes conscious, sometimes not), come with our own set of expectations, baggage, damage, etc., which we somehow try to have understood by someone else, often failing, sometimes succeeding. It's just hard to be human, period. But, sometimes, something "clicks", maybe just for a moment, and we feel connected, accepted, loved. Those are the moments we all keep living for.

Welcome to AVEN, peace, :) truly a place to "feel connected, accepted, loved".

I hope you threw out a trail of breadcrumbs so's you can find your way back ...

That's one reason we always give plenty of :cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake:

to newcomers on the Boards :D

Wow. Peace you truly touched my heart and I am NOT being sarcastic, Shaggy, but echoes his greeting, though breadcumbs will only keep you existing you need chocolate, the darker the better to LIVE!! welcome and I'm sure you will find friends here, I have!! :) :) :cake::cake::cake:

I had trouble finding my way back here, Rayser, but I was so happy to hear I touched your heart. See, that was one of those moments for me, I connected, and someone connected to me. This will nourish me for days to come :wub: . You're absolutely right about the chocolate, by the way. Chocolate is a MUST! I hope to find friends here, and to be one.

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