Human touch

[newgirl]

Do you think Myspace or social networking will take over people meeting each other offline in the future? Is human face to face talking done?

[Aimeendfire]

well I'm not an older asexual but oh well..

recently one of my teachers was talking about how we are losing that human contact. It was after the hurricane had passed over my city and we were with no lights for days and for some a week. anyways she said that when she was home with no electricity she could hear everything outside. what she used to describe it was that there was no technological wall to cut her off from the outside world. when before she would be online and having a couple of fans running..with no electricity everything was silent. she said she felt very disconnected without the internet..and I know I also felt that way. In my opinion we are more internationally connected than we are locally. I rarely talk to my neighbor but just this morning I talked to people on the other side of the world. Even if its easier for me to talk to people over the internet some human contact is still laking

well thats my rambling ..I have no clue if any of that made sense but there you go

[Sally]

Yes, it made sense. I have no idea where you live (although I guess it's in the US) but I'm beginning to know more about people on AVEN than I do about the neighbors on the street I've lived on for 24 years (who move often, and we just don't talk anyway).

I worry about what will happen to people if they get their electricity/electronics shut off. Everything in our lives is dependent upon computers of some sort: cars, banks, grocery stores, work, and much human contact.

Has any (well-written) science/future fiction been written on a world where suddenly we lose computers/electricity and what it does to humans' psychology, not just their physical being?

[KAGU143]

Well, I have had had MUCH better luck with friendships that I started online than I have had with those that started in real life.

I think it is safe to say that ALL of my best friends (with one possible exception from decades ago) and my fiance' are people that I met online.

'Works for me!

It's a perfectly valid way to meet people - much like the pen pal relationships that were popular in days of yore.

Posting pictures isn't as important as sharing ideas and finding others with common interests and outlooks on life.

-GB

[Aimeendfire]

yeah I know its not bad for the most part..its just I get an image of people just being in front of the computer ALL the time and seeing no need to go outside and interact with each other..:lol: I know thats not true since some have the opportunity to meet face to face the people they meet online

oh and I've read a book where the opposite happens Sally..its called Killing Time by Caleb Carr. it shows what happens when everything is dependent on technology ..mostly the internet. its a very good book.

[Shaggy]

Do you think Myspace or social networking will take over people meeting each other offline in the future? Is human face to face talking done?

Most teens, 20's & 30's I know have assimilated www, phones/texting into their RL.

Mind, they wouldn't THINK of visiting friends, going to pubs, clubs, events of any kind, without their phones/pdas. :D

Possibly the kids who prop up a PC 'all day' are the ones who in olden days (he he ... love that phrase) would have been found in a library, or someplace quiet with their nose in a book.

But clubbing, concerts & the like seem to be more popular than ever, so nah ... offline still rules & will continue to do so.

(As long as ya got ya phone, plenty of charge, & plenty of credit!) :D

[cijay]

Do you think Myspace or social networking will take over people meeting each other offline in the future? Is human face to face talking done?

Certainly electronics in general are jeapordising physical socialising. The times that my friends can fit me into their busy schedules are getting less and less and when we DO get together, it's having to talk in between phone calls and text messages and blackberrying and people far more important than I am it's getting harder and harder to have any kind of contact.

[AVENCakes]

Well, I have had had MUCH better luck with friendships that I started online than I have had with those that started in real life.

I think it is safe to say that ALL of my best friends (with one possible exception from decades ago) and my fiance' are people that I met online.

'Works for me!

I think all my friends are online... which feels a bit sad. It's harder to keep contact in person. Online you can be talking to 5 people while working on one or two things and browsing websites. In person you have to basically empty out that time to hang out with them.

[cijay]

In person you have to basically empty out that time to hang out with them.

Exactly...and people are very reluctant to do that nowadays. I always feel like I'm infringing on their time with more important things/people. It's very insulting.

[Guest disjointed]

I do agree that the internet has opened a new way for me and when it comes to Asexuality it is the only way I can "talk" to other Asexuals which I doubt if I could do away from the screen due to the few and far between issue

What worries me about things like facebook is that it all seems to instant and fake.

Say someone passes away, within momments the "my beloved friend" and U iz gonna b mizzed" type post's happen but within a few days it all stops? it's like recovery is as instantanious as the grief, to me that de-humanises things and in some ways I think the internet has taken away social,people and human skills

[AVENCakes]

In person you have to basically empty out that time to hang out with them.

Exactly...and people are very reluctant to do that nowadays. I always feel like I'm infringing on their time with more important things/people. It's very insulting.

*nods in agreement* I feel weird just talking to people or wnating to hang out with them unless it's to study for school because people seem so busy. I'ts just messed up.

I do agree that the internet has opened a new way for me and when it comes to Asexuality it is the only way I can "talk" to other Asexuals which I doubt if I could do away from the screen due to the few and far between issue

Same thing. I've met asexuals, transsexuals, multiples, etc. online- some on sites I wouldn't've thought I'd run into them, but none in real life. If you relied on life, it'd be easy to feel very lonely and like the only person int he world who feels a certain way- but it also means that you'd only find people you can actually talk to.

What worries me about things like facebook is that it all seems to instant and fake.

Yeah, defiitely. People you barely know get labeled "friends", all that stuff. I don't trust things like facebook much.

[Beardless]

(Another youngling here: apologies. But this is a topic that became close to my heart recently.)

This will hit the topic eventually. A few of weeks ago, one of the people I lived with last year and one of her friends came over to sleep one night while they were visiting the city. The last time the pair of them came to sleep here for a couple of days, and he stayed for 3 weeks (this was before I'd moved in, but my friend had). So I arrive home, and there's my friend and a guy I recognise only by reputation, and I don't know if they've talked to my housemates, but they're here, and they're arguing about whether using a computer means that you're supporting capitalism. They drifted onto other arguments, and my housemate arrived home, and we were sat, typing away at our laptops. He was complaining that computers were bad because "people" (which, of course, we took personally) just texted and typed and never paid attention to what was going on around them. I was paying attention to every word, typing and waffling on here to avoid joining in the argument going on in real life. He mourned the loss of villages, and the like.

Eventually, due to his generalisations, I snapped. Yes, I was vaguely internet-addicted, and older people weren't. However, I helped out the (much) older people in my community, even when their families didn't. I got angrier than I had in a long time, because my housemate said I needed the practice (I don't like letting myself get angry). After his few-hour monologue on how all societies ills were due to the internet, and our response, he let himself out at 2am, using modern technology to blag a lift off his parents.

So, what am I trying to say?

1. Some people may have no life outside the internet, but that's a huge generalisation, and can be quite offensive.

2. Technology is relied upon by even it's greatest critics.

Also: I use facebook. Mostly to organise when we're going out to the pub.

[cijay]

What worries me about things like facebook is that it all seems to instant and fake.

Say someone passes away, within momments the "my beloved friend" and U iz gonna b mizzed" type post's happen but within a few days it all stops? it's like recovery is as instantanious as the grief, to me that de-humanises things and in some ways I think the internet has taken away social,people and human skills

Facebook CAN be instant and fake but it doesn't have to be. That's like saying TV just hypnotises and rots your brain...yes, if you just mindlessly watch it but it can also inform and educate. Facebook CAN be fake and all that but I only have family and friends, I don't accept outsiders and it's a great way for me to stay in touch with everyone 8000 miles away.

But you did touch on something else that I hate about electronic contact. I never realised before but the spelling of the human race is becoming appalling. The people I always thought had their shit together can't even type out a simple sentence without using 'u' and '4' as words. I had no idea they didn't know that "I" is supposed to be upper case and that sentences end in periods. I'm not saying this as a teacher, I'm saying this as someone who learned to read and write when I was six years old and never forgot how. My niece can't spell. She doesn't have to...or should I say she dznt haf 2. She does with me though because she knows not to bother talking to me like a 4 year old.

Give me uninterrupted conversation ANY day over that nonsense.

So, what am I trying to say?

1. Some people may have no life outside the internet, but that's a huge generalisation, and can be quite offensive.

2. Technology is relied upon by even it's greatest critics.

Also: I use facebook. Mostly to organise when we're going out to the pub.

I get your points, it's not the techonology that's inconvenient, it's the pricks who abuse it. It's like cell phones. The phones aren't rude, it's the asshole in the theatre who is. The time I object to it is when I've made a point to go out with someone, they have invited me somewhere, we've made a date.

However, when you've set side out to visit with someone, met them at a restaurant, asked them over to visit, gone to their house to visit, gone out with them or whatever then you keep glancing at your computer, text, blackberry or whatever fancy gadget it's just plain rude. It's insulting, it's mean and it's telling the other person that their company is not valuable. Try to think of the electronic gadget as a person. So, you and I have made a date to meet and have lunch. We sit down and a friend of mine comes in, sits on the table between you and I with her back to you and talks to me. She gets up and leaves, you and I get two sentences in and then my mother comes in, she sits on the table with her back to you and talks to me for awhile then she goes to sit at another table. You and I say a few more words, then I get up and go to mum's table and sit there for a bit, then I come back to our table, take a bite out of my food, ask you how you're doing, then I go back to mum's table and talk to her. Then I come back to our table and mum brings over a friend I haven't seen for awhile, so I talk to her. How much patience would you have for that? That's what a cell phone/blackberry etc is. It's a third party that is unwelcome at a table for two. I just say, if the person wants to text and chat and visit with something electronic, that's cool, I can go away, I don't have to go out to lunch with someone to be ignored, I can go to the library and be ignored by a whole city full of people.