mackat5 Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 I work with elderly/disabled, helping them to stay home. There have been a couple who don't understand just why I am single, never married, and no bf, ever! One that I have right now I think was a "player" when he was younger, because he just can't get into his mind that I have never had a husband/bf and don't want one. He teases a lot about having someone, or me being there at the house other than when I'm supposed to be. And now he thinks that he can tell me how to wear my hair(prefer it short, curlier that way!). I can handle him, most of the time, but every once in a while he gets on my nerves, and I threaten to have the office to remove me from his case. That usually silences him. For a while. Info, I don't mind at all people knowing about me, never married and all that. Figure at 66, I can tell folks, and if they don't like it, TOO bad!!!!! It's my life, not theirs. And my friends who really count and family know and accept me as I am. Link to post Share on other sites
cijay Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 I work with elderly/disabled, helping them to stay home. There have been a couple who don't understand just why I am single, never married, and no bf, ever! One that I have right now I think was a "player" when he was younger, because he just can't get into his mind that I have never had a husband/bf and don't want one. He teases a lot about having someone, or me being there at the house other than when I'm supposed to be. And now he thinks that he can tell me how to wear my hair(prefer it short, curlier that way!). I can handle him, most of the time, but every once in a while he gets on my nerves, and I threaten to have the office to remove me from his case. That usually silences him. For a while. Info, I don't mind at all people knowing about me, never married and all that. Figure at 66, I can tell folks, and if they don't like it, TOO bad!!!!! It's my life, not theirs. And my friends who really count and family know and accept me as I am. If you don't mind then it's no big deal but if the guy who is really persistent doesn't let up, see if they can get another worker to serve him and let him know why you won't be there anymore. But you're right, some folks just won't get it. Don't waste your time with them - it's like teaching pigs to sing, it wastes your time and annoys the pig. Link to post Share on other sites
Ziffler Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 Its interesting how when we were younger we worried about what people thought of us and how they would take it when they found out that we are asexual. But now that we are older, who really gives a care what they think. I like your attitude. I'm only 56 and have that attitude myself. I am single, I will always be single and I am a virgin and if that bothers people then its there problem not mine. :D But as for your dirty old man, yes hes a sexual for sure and is the poster boy for the term, "Dirty Old Man". Oh and by the way, sexuals, especially old men sexuals, believe they can get away with alot more because of there age. So dont let him get the better of you. I have family member that have worked in nursing homes and it didnt matter to the old men there that the caregivers were married they still tried to pinch there butts and grab wat they could reach. So its not just because you are asexual that this old man is after you. He's doing it because he feels he has the right to do it and can get away with it, pleading senility. :D Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 Yes -- another bit of proof that sexual old men are still sexual men -- the urge doesn't die at age 60, although the capacity may be a bit less. I.e., sexual old men aren't "safe! And as Ziffler says, they tend to think they've got an excuse. Link to post Share on other sites
mackat5 Posted August 17, 2008 Author Share Posted August 17, 2008 The - uh - "gentleman" has never offered to touch me. If he had, I would have been out of there like a shot! It has been all words so far. That's why I can handle him, because other than talking, he behaves. He seems to know just how far he can go, then quits. I still will leave quickly if he ever touches me inappropriately. That's a given. btw, he does not know about my background. I usually don't tell clents about that. What irritates me most, btw, is that he thinks he can tell me how to wear my hair. And he is NOT related!! Link to post Share on other sites
Islander9 Posted August 17, 2008 Share Posted August 17, 2008 mackat5 - all my sisters are /were nurses (one died). All have worked with geriatric patients. While totally concurring with the comments I've read on this thread, there is the matter of age-related dementias (I'm going by what my sisters learned!) so he may not be able to realise he's transgressed (geez, telling you he'd like to see your hairstyle as, is pretty transgressive to me...) And whyever should he know your background/sexual identity? Cheers/all best (cant find the cake icon!) Link to post Share on other sites
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