Brother Wilbur Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 On Wednesday the 21st... I think (it may be the week after) of this month, which is April, of course, in case you didn't know, there is a "Day of Silence" to honor or respect homosexuals, bisexuals, transgender and whatever the other is and the "silence" they keep by staying "in the closet". We do it at my school, so those who sign up are silent the entire day. I have put in my strong opinion to the club running it, the PRISM club, like gay-straight alliance, that asexuals be added to the list, at least for my school. I'll let you guys know how it turns out. I just feel like there is so little information out there and we are so under-represented, and personally, I am rather silent about it myself, except with my friends. Some say that there is no way that it could cause the embarrassment or pain or shame that other different sexualities cause, but I disagree. If yall want to write something here, just expressing why asexuality should be included in the Day of Silence, I can present them to the club, it would most likely help. I would feel so heartened by this. I do remember last year how people made fun of me for being quiet, as I am normally a loudish person, but really, that just doesn't matter. I want to be silent for gay, bi, transgender, whatever that other one was, I can't for the life of me remember, AND asexuality. Laura Link to post Share on other sites
Silly Green Monkey Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 Asexuals are silent because they are not believed, and people make their own assumptions about their sexuality anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Jayann Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 Asexuals are made silent because they are told that mature, primary loving relationships are and must be sexual, and that to think otherwise is indicative of pathological or asocial behavior. Link to post Share on other sites
cijay Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 That's right. Trying to get most sexual people to understand or even BELEIVE in asexuality is like teaching a pig to sing. You waste your time and you annoy the pig - so why bother? Link to post Share on other sites
fluffy_hime Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 Maybe that's why this girl in my class wouldn't speak last week. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 You guys rock- thank you! thank you thank you! I'm so bad at explaining myself- or explaining something I can't even remember the word for what it is I'm explaining- but see how bad I am at explaining it? If you have anymore explanation, just keep 'em coming! Link to post Share on other sites
Brother Wilbur Posted April 10, 2004 Author Share Posted April 10, 2004 I thought I posted.. but obviously not... but thank you all so very much! I am very horrible at explaining things so this will be a real help... if anyone has anymore, yay! keep 'em coming! Can't wait to go rub it in those gay people's faces that THEY AREN'T THE ONLY ONES!! Sometimes... it annoys me when people who are in some sort of minority group act as if they are the only ones- like the black kids in my school- they are actually the largest minority. They make a lot of noise, even though there are no problems in my school... while the Iraqi, Pakistani, Turkish.. etc kids don't make a fuss at all. We had a school meeting recently and it turned to that sort of stuff... and it was kinda funny when all the very minor minorities got up there and reminded everyone of it. and some of the people in PRISM that I mentioned this wee campaign to gave me a look as if I was being.. I'm not really sure, actually. So thanks for helping. This was one big ramble. Laura Link to post Share on other sites
Carsonspire Posted April 10, 2004 Share Posted April 10, 2004 My school observed the Day of Silence on March 29 in order to avoid scheduling conflicts. Approximately 150 students remained silent from 8 am to 4 pm with an optional break from 12 to 1 for lunch. There was a "breaking the silence" speakout at 4 pm, where people could speak about how the silence affected them or other personal experiences. The event on a whole was a success. Later in the week, I was astounded to read an editorial in the school paper, written from two people who scorned the effectiveness of the silence. These two people used a quote from Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. to support their position, namely: "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." Dr. King was saying that we will remember more when our friends stand by and and watch us face hatred and discrimination and DO not do anything about it. A silent protest is still an action to raise awareness of the issue at hand. The two editorial writers show that they are willing to be those silent ones who stand by and do nothing. As to why asexuals should be included in the Day of Silence, I agree with those who have already posted, especially Silly Green Monkey: "Asexuals are silent because they are not believed ..." We live in a society of labels; what has no word to describe it, does not exist. AVEN-ites obviously recognize the word asexual has legitimate meaning behind it, but much of society does not, and therefore, is completely ignorant of the existence of asexuality. Personally, I have only seriously spoken to one person about my relationship to asexuality. With other friends, I just joke about it, and with the rest of the population, I completely avoid the subject. I remain silent. Laura, your last post concerns me a little. I understand how you feel about minorities ignoring minorities, but just remember it's a two-way interaction. I think it is a wise decision to make the GLBT community aware of asexuality, but I would not recommend "rubbing it in their faces." Please let us know how your talk with PRISM goes and what kind of reactions you get on April 21. Link to post Share on other sites
Brother Wilbur Posted April 10, 2004 Author Share Posted April 10, 2004 Agh, no, I don't want to come off as that. I just meant to convey how annoying it is that we are so ignored. I don't want to sound rascist or anti-gay, because I am not. I fully support them, but it really annoys me that they don't support back. I think that when, in trying to change things, they act so... superior I suppose? Can't find a word right now- it really is more destructive. Most of the people are great and doing a great job and are actually opening- but many of the others are very closed-minded it seems, and yet want everybody be open enough for them... I think to solve everything we have got to work together and set examples that we want to be followed. Hee hee, I don't plan to actually "rub it in their faces"... I mean, I cant' wait to let it dawn on them, and hopefully it will help.... I talk a lot, but I'm fairly harmless. Even if I pretend to be mean- like, mockingly "intimidate" someone?- I always start laughing because I think its just so ... dumb. I'm really sorry to come off as that. I really don't want to . I offend people without meaning to at all, and send complete opposite messages than I intend to send. Its gotten me in spots. So, very very sorry. Laura Link to post Share on other sites
Jordan Posted April 11, 2004 Share Posted April 11, 2004 Asexuals are made silent because they are told that mature, primary loving relationships are and must be sexual, and that to think otherwise is indicative of pathological or asocial behavior. But, but sexuals are doing the "dirty thing". Link to post Share on other sites
cijay Posted April 11, 2004 Share Posted April 11, 2004 You were saying that you were annoyed because of all the support you give them and they don't give you any support in return...is the support you give them sincere? Like, you're supporting them because it's something you believe in (it's rhetorical, I know your answer) - then don't get annoyed that they're not supporting you in return. You're supporting them because that's the type of person you are - you're not doing it just so they'll support you are you? To the ones who don't return it, just flick them off your shoulder and concentrate on the ones who do. Mostly tho' it does just boil down to people just not considering that asexuality exists. I'm glad you clarified that you were kidding about rubbing their faces in it but don't edit your post because someone who may be planning to do just that needs to read it. Rubbing anyone's face in any issue does not make you very popular. If you expect them to (a) taken notice (B) take you seriously © respect you, rubbing their face in it is a sure way to discourage all of the above. Link to post Share on other sites
Brother Wilbur Posted April 11, 2004 Author Share Posted April 11, 2004 Aiaaaiiii Yes, my support is sincere, I think I'm fairly open-minded... I just don't like it when people don't even try to practice what they preach and condemn others for... I mean, no one is perfect, but if you strongly preach something, you should attempt to do that, be an example- good thing for me I don't really preach anything, except lets all calm down and be happy and at peace with each other, "all you need is love" and all, so thats pretty easy for me to do.......... but I do think I'm allowed to be annoyed, no? Pretty much all emotions are OK, but many should not be acted upon... Never planned the face-rubbing.. but come on.. its fun to say, isn't it? Kinda all evil and such... heh heh.. OK, case closed? Sorry if the comment was out-of-place and all, but it wasn't sincerely meant so lets have a good Easter if your religion (if you have one, that is) is so inclined and lets all eat lots of food whether it is or isn't. Joy! Yay!! Peace! Yay!! I love yall, Laura Link to post Share on other sites
VivreEstEsperer Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Laura, I think that's a great idea, best of luck to you in it! I thought the day of silence was april 11? i guess not. "Asexuals are silent because society doesn't give us reason to think we even exist." Kate Link to post Share on other sites
-------------------------- Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 I did this last year, but no one noticed. Seriously. Link to post Share on other sites
Borrible Cal Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 Asexuals are silenced by cultural assumptions that active sexuality of some form is universal, and that absence of sexual activity and/or experience is abnormal, the product of dysfunction, illness or abuse, and the cause of distress. Asexuals are silenced by a culture that imposes sexuality on everything. Above all, too many asexuals are silenced by the lack of any vocabulary to talk about their asexulity in a positive way, a way that doesn't leave them constructing themselves as sick, abnormal or 'marking time'. I think, in the light of that, asking for asexuals to be included in your Day of Silence is a good idea, Laura, and I hope you're able to convince the club to include us! Best of luck. Borrible Cal. Link to post Share on other sites
Carsonspire Posted April 17, 2004 Share Posted April 17, 2004 For those of you wondering, GLSEN (The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network, i.e. the people who started the day of silence) are recognizing two Days of Silence. The "official" one is April 21, but this conflicts with some school calendars, so some schools are observing the Day of Silence on April 14. Sorry, I didn't mean to jump on you, Brother Wilbur. I just wanted to make sure you weren't serious about "rubbing it in their faces." All expressions aside, I do know what you mean about lack of support sometimes. It goes along with the idea that if you are a minority, you need to support other minorities, too. And of course, everyone should practice what they preach. No hard feelings? In peace, love, and understanding, RadicalFem Link to post Share on other sites
Silly Green Monkey Posted April 18, 2004 Share Posted April 18, 2004 My school is observing Day of Silence next week, participants stop speaking at noon and break their silence at nine with a viewing of a documentary about Stonewall. Our GSA announced the day as being for the people who have been silenced, but not merely those silenced on the basis of sexuality. Everyone, even those silenced by race and gender. Link to post Share on other sites
Brother Wilbur Posted April 18, 2004 Author Share Posted April 18, 2004 Radical Fem.... Mwah! ...but, you know, not in that way..... -Laura Oh, P.S., I haven't really gotten an answer yet. I suppose they are conferring. I've been trying to use my friends in the club, but not directly - see, I'm being silent, aren't I stupid? I'm getting worried, though, as its this Wednesday! So I may just charge on up there and be unsilent. Thanks again for the input. I shall just print your blurbs out and give it directly from yall, no just "summarizing" yaddah yaddah. So, thank you! -Laura And yeah, oooh I like the Day of Silence for EVERYONE- maybe I can try to tack that in, too... it might be late though. Anyhow, there is still next year. Eeep! This is exciting! -Laura, again. (Last Time.) Link to post Share on other sites
gambit_boi Posted April 20, 2004 Share Posted April 20, 2004 those i've met who choose to keep silent about who they are do so out of fear or shame. the town we live in is small and sheltered- those who break out of the mold here (or actively celebrate their differences) are often shut out, harassed, or worse. for a lot of my peers, silence is a means of toughing it out or avoiding trouble. which doesn't mean that we'd choose invisibility on our own. Link to post Share on other sites
Brother Wilbur Posted April 21, 2004 Author Share Posted April 21, 2004 They didn't add asexuals. So I just made a small poster with direct quotes from yall- I didn't use your names, of course, but I didn't take the credit and all- actually no one knows I actually put it up, oh well. Here ya go: BE SILENT FOR ASEXUALITY Words From asexuals: “Asexuals are silent because they are not believed, and people make their own assumptions about their sexuality anyway.” “Asexuals are made silent because they are told that mature, primary loving relationships are and must be sexual, and that to think otherwise is indicative of pathological or asocial behavior.” “Trying to get most sexual people to understand or even BELEIVE in asexuality is like teaching a pig to sing. You waste your time and you annoy the pig - so why bother?” “I have only seriously spoken to one person about my relationship to asexuality. With other friends, I just joke about it, and with the rest of the population, I completely avoid the subject. I remain silent.” "Asexuals are silent because society doesn't give us reason to think we even exist." Sadness. Next year, though. Gotta study for math test, aii! -Laura Link to post Share on other sites
Carsonspire Posted April 21, 2004 Share Posted April 21, 2004 Oooohh, we get quoted on a poster--we should feel special :-) Thank you for your efforts, Brother Wilbur. I'd be willing to work together on an asexuality campaign of sorts for next year's Day of Silence. Who knows what changes we'll see in the meantime? Link to post Share on other sites
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