sulfur Posted August 1 Share Posted August 1 I am an asexual person, which isnt a problem to my partner and isnt to me, it just gets a little annoying and a little depressing sometimes. My partner is hypersexual, and sometimes she needs comforting. As a little background info, there are three people in this relationship, me, him, and his boyfriend. We dont really get to see each other that much so we bridge the gap over discord and phone calls. Back to the topic at hand. I used to be good at comforting him and all was good but now i have been having difficulty. I dont quite understand how i was able to better support him back then because i was winging it and not taking any notes. I have a specific problem solving process that helps me solve problems that goes like this. Identify the problem, find what caused the issue, work on what caused the issue, research ways to get better, and lastly, grow. I am stuck at step 3 because i dont know how exactly i managed to comfort him better. Can anyone help me with this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bare_trees Posted August 1 Share Posted August 1 It's difficult to say because I think the best thing to do would be to ask him directly what he needs, but I think your very structured problem-solving system might not take into account how different problems require different approaches as well some people's tendencies to not always want to seek out a solution to an issue right away--we just want someone to listen and remind us we're not alone. I have a friend who has trouble with this because they always want to find solutions, so I try to remember to tell them *before* I go into something that's bothering me that I only want to vent and get support, or I'm looking for feedback for possible courses of action. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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