What menstrual products do you use?

[JustHere]

(see poll)

[everywhere and nowhere]

Disposable pads only. I can't use anything insertable, and reusable pads... sorry, but the discomfort is too high for me. Even disregarding the "ick" factor, I usually can't hand wash anything due to my allergy (small wounds and scratches on my hands, and extremely dry skin in general)... and keeping a box with used pads soaking there in my bathroom feels just too disgusting. Oh well. It's probably just a few years more. I'm almost 44 years old (and after 45 menopause is not even considered "early" anymore!), some studies indicate that women who don't have sex may have menopause earlier, and - probably because modern high-calorie diet, and generally famine pretty much never happening anymore in developed countries, has made the age of menarche drop from about 15-16 to 11-13 - women now also more often enter menopause earlier, around the age of 48 or so rather than after 50. And while I don't have any of the unpleasant symptoms associated with menopause, my period is getting out of sync. It always used to be quite regular, and now... well, most of the times it remains regular, but within the last two years I have experienced a few quite big disturbances in my cycle, from 20 to 50 days. I take it completely calmly and consider it a sign of approaching menopause, and given that I'm asexual and childless by choice, that I perceive being a woman as a political identity and don't feel an emotional connection to biological femininity - I welcome menopause and would be happy to have it start as soon as possible.

I just wish people weren't shamed for their choice of menstrual products. First, the environmental factor... I absolutely don't want to say that we shouldn't care about our impact on the environment, or that If We Can Do Little, It's Fine To Do Nothing At All. But shifting all the responsibility for mitigating the effects of climate change to individuals is very convenient to big corporations. They are the ones whose responsibility for the current crisis is bigger by orders of magnitude. And they have the money and power to change much, but instead use it to lobby politicians into letting them poison the planet a little longer and shifting the burden on individuals. (There's a nice more general term for that: privatisation of profits, collectivisation of costs.) Really, compared to their influence, the environmental impact of one person's mentrual pads is negligible.

And we just shouldn't be pushed to do things which go far outside our comfort zone. No, not everyone can use insertable products. AFAB asexuals are obviously much more likely than AFAB people in general to have never had sex, women who have never been physically fit are also less likely to have damaged their vaginal coronae in nonsexual situations. Then there are also problems such as vaginismus and vulvodynia, which can too prevent someone from being able to use insertable products. Not everyone is comfortable enough with their intimate parts, and there's nothing wrong with not being comfortable with them, disliking touching them, being afraid to try inserting anything etc. - especially if you are asexual and therefore can comfortably live your life without, so to speak, using your private parts.

[raven4]

Used to use tampons as they felt the cleanest to me.

I don't have to use products anymore though 

The nurse switched my contraceptive pill a couple of years ago and on the new meds I dont have periods and I definitely dont miss them! 

[Sister Mercurial]

Sanitary towels or tampons, depending on what suits the situation best.  I assume the cups are designed to fit sexually active women, so that wouldn't work for me.  As for the reusable products, if my washing machine can't get the stains out if the sanitary towels are not sufficient, then why would I assume it'll be able to get all the blood out of period pants etc.?  

[Larre]

IUD is one of the main menstrual management products.

 

For those who haven't considered it, an IUD means you probably won't bleed at all while it's in there. (Unless you're unlucky.) Maybe some very light spotting, at free-bleedable levels.

[Larre]

21 minutes ago, Sister Mercurial said:

Sanitary towels or tampons, depending on what suits the situation best.  I assume the cups are designed to fit sexually active women, so that wouldn't work for me.  As for the reusable products, if my washing machine can't get the stains out if the sanitary towels are not sufficient, then why would I assume it'll be able to get all the blood out of period pants etc.?  

You're right about this--it doesn't. Black ones are best for that reason. Staining aside, laundering them and drying them (especially in winter) is a mission, because I wouldn't want to put them in a dryer. Drying takes days. This means people need enough pairs of them to last an entire cycle basically, and each pair is expensive.

 

Period pants are also only good for light to moderate flows. For anyone with e.g. heavy (e.g. endometriosis) levels of bleeding (about one in five), period pants won't cut it.

 

I keep seeing people sing their praises, but they sure aren't good for everyone who menstruates.

[everywhere and nowhere]

23 minutes ago, Larre said:

IUD is one of the main menstrual management products.

 

For those who haven't considered it, an IUD means you probably won't bleed at all while it's in there. (Unless you're unlucky.) Maybe some very light spotting, at free-bleedable levels.

Ugh... not possible for someone with an extreme nudity aversion, who therefore doesn't allow anyone, for any reason, near their private parts. I won't let anyone see or touch them and this is non-negotiable, this is a matter of life and death for me.

It seems that the use of contraceptives by celibate women, only to get rid of periods, is a growing trend... But it was never an option for me: first, in Poland it requires contact with the above-implied medical specialisation, and second... given my varicose veins, just no. Hormonal contraception would be simply dangerous for me. Good thing that I'm asexual and sex-averse, so at least I naturally use the only method of contraception with zero failure rate: being aware that no, sex is not obligatory, and sexual nonconformism is something to be proud of.

[bare_trees]

Never had any luck with tampons thanks to vaginismus, and it's not important enough to me to keep trying.  I use the disposable pads on the heaviest couple of days and reusable cloth pads the rest of the time.

[verily-forsooth-egads]

Best of luck to the people who use cups but I literally could never. 🤢 Tampons might be possible but I'd rather be able to use them at the rate I need them without worrying about TSS, which is exactly what I do with pads, which is not enough to feel bad about environmentally.

[everywhere and nowhere]

5 hours ago, verily-forsooth-egads said:

Best of luck to the people who use cups but I literally could never.

I don't even try. By the way, I tried using a tampon once and couldn't get it in. I cannot imagine being able to use a menstrual cup if the opening is so small (self-checked, gyno rejection is a legitimate choice) that there's no way I could insert two fingers. I just wish producers stopped their propaganda that anyone can use them - no, not anyone, for some people it won't work. It's not like I care about being anatomically a virgin - it's enough for me to be proud that I'm biographically a virgin, that I reject compulsory sexuality and don't force myself to do things which are terrifying for me - but what could I do about it? I obviously won't have sex and won't subject to a tiny surgical procedure to get rid of it, because nobody, and I mean nobody, is allowed to see or touch my private parts, I'd prefer death to having them exposed. And then there's a possibility that I also have vaginismus and wouldn't be able to use cups anyway. I won't introduce any changes for what is, anyway, the last few years of my menstruating.

[Guest]

Switched to the diva cup when I was 17 and never looked back. I have reusable cloth pads for backup, most of which I made myself from old pillowcases and washcloths 

 

Edit: never been sexually active. I've used the size 1 diva cup since I was 17 because they did not have size 0 back then. I have a high cervix so I never really had an issue getting it in

[JustHere]

15 hours ago, Sister Mercurial said:

I assume the cups are designed to fit sexually active women, so that wouldn't work for me. 

Not necessarily. There are cups that are smaller and softer, which tend to be marketed towards teens but can be used by anyone. It's just personal preference in terms of comfort and anatomy.

[SpaceDustbin]

Last year I switched to reusable pads and period underwear, which are pretty great, but on holiday I use disposable pads or tampons. 

Not a big fan of tampons, but they're handy for when you're out on/in the water for the day

[everywhere and nowhere]

9 hours ago, JustHere said:

There are cups that are smaller and softer, which tend to be marketed towards teens

As usual, an assumption that only young girls can be sexually inactive... (And actually, I have even seen tests made to recommend a particular model to a new user... as far as I remember, they included a question about whether one has given birth, about age... but not about sexual history, because they assumed that adults with no sexual experience don't exist?...)

Of course, I'm not accusing you, I'm angry with the producers, and even more - with the society as a whole, for its sex normativity.

9 hours ago, JustHere said:

but can be used by anyone

No, not everyone. Most AFAB people - maybe, but certainly not all. Even if the cup can be folded to be no larger than a tampon, removing it requires being able to insert two fingers. It just won't work for some people who have never had sex. There are microperforate vaginal coronae, there are also problems such as vaginismus, or just being mentally uncomfortable with putting fingers there... all of these can prevent someone from being able to use a mentrual cup.

This is what I meant above: producers promote the view that any AFAB person can use a menstrual cup, but it's not true. It's great if someone finds it convenient, but it shouldn't be presented as a magic solution for everyone. And people shouldn't be shamed for their choice of menstrual products.

[Larre]

On 4/6/2025 at 9:11 AM, everywhere and nowhere said:

Ugh... not possible for someone with an extreme nudity aversion, who therefore doesn't allow anyone, for any reason, near their private parts. I won't let anyone see or touch them and this is non-negotiable, this is a matter of life and death for me.

It seems that the use of contraceptives by celibate women, only to get rid of periods, is a growing trend... But it was never an option for me: first, in Poland it requires contact with the above-implied medical specialisation, and second... given my varicose veins, just no. Hormonal contraception would be simply dangerous for me. Good thing that I'm asexual and sex-averse, so at least I naturally use the only method of contraception with zero failure rate: being aware that no, sex is not obligatory, and sexual nonconformism is something to be proud of.

Yes, it's a life and death matter for me, too. IUD is the treatment for stage four endometriosis. 

 

If I hadn't given birth, I would feel the same way. (Compared to the trauma of giving birth, it's doable.)

 

However, your comment is valuable and I don't mean to downplay the trauma of getting an IUD inserted. I had mine inserted under general anaesthetic at the same time as having organs removed. There was very little trauma in that. I woke up and it was all done.

 

Getting it out and replaced four years later, here's what no one had told me at any point: There's a one in five chance the strings disappear. I had heard this was quite rare. But no, as it turns out. It's common. I asked my GP for pain medication that also makes me relaxed. I don't believe the oxy he prescribed did a single thing, but perhaps it did. I was at least able to get on the table. He poked around for AGES. Eventually he gave up.

 

If they can't get it out, next step is an ultrasound. I asked the GP if it would be internal--he said no--but when I got there it was totally an internal pelvic ultrasound. (I have no idea why he said no--there's no other way for them to access that imagery.) So once again my boundaries were violated.

 

However, that wasn't too bad, mostly because the ultrasound room is very dark instead of super bright. The ultrasound specialist was a woman, and I think that made a difference. Men don't do those ones, so she is used to doing it every day. It felt more like going to the dentist.

 

When she worked out where the strings were, I was sent back to the gynaecologist who had initially inserted it and performed surgery. When I walked into the room I saw he had the curtain and big paper towels all ready--he encouraged me to get on the bed and that he had a special implement and he could get it out no problem.

 

No way. I'd had enough poking and prodding by this point. So, this being Australia, with publicly funded medicine, he agreed to remove and replace under general anaesthetic again at the public hospital. And that's what happened. In four years' time I'll need to have this one taken out, but I'll be in menopause so that'll be my last time getting one in.

 

Note that doctors of all genders routinely underplay how horrible it can sometimes be, and also how much it can literally hurt. In some people it stimulates contractions. Like, birth contractions. But you never know if you're going to be one of those people. If you haven't given birth, you're more likely to be one of those people. It's stochastic.

 

So if anyone is contemplating an IUD, or is required to get one for their health (as I am), I'm just giving you some information that your doctors won't necessarily give you.

 

Make sure you find a doctor who takes trauma and pain seriously. There are gynaecologists who do. Some need to be coaxed into providing you with adequate medication going in. I believe when you're asexual, it's worse. Especially if you're sex repulsed. I don't necessarily recommend saying that unless you have an excellent relationship with your healthcare provider. I would use the trauma angle first, honestly, without elaboration.

[silent__]

I use period underwear with reusable pads inside (I find either one by itself leaks). They are so much more comfortable to me than disposable pads, which feel plasticky and gross. And wayy cheaper because I don't have to be buying them all the time. I've never tried using a tampon and have no desire to.

[SkyWorld]

I used to use a cup. I thought it helped me with dysphoria since I didn't have to interact with it as much as a tampon or see it every time I use the bathroom like a pad. Interacting with it was kept minimal and I didn't really feel when once it's in properly. 

[JustHere]

On 4/6/2025 at 8:17 PM, everywhere and nowhere said:

No, not everyone. Most AFAB people - maybe, but certainly not all.

To clarify: when I said "anyone" I was referring to both people who have had sex and those who have not. Obviously, menstrual cups aren't going to work for every single AFAB individual. No one thing is going to work for everyone.

 

On 4/6/2025 at 9:00 AM, Cranston said:

Switched to the diva cup when I was 17 and never looked back. I have reusable cloth pads for backup, most of which I made myself from old pillowcases and washcloths 

 

Edit: never been sexually active. I've used the size 1 diva cup since I was 17 because they did not have size 0 back then. I have a high cervix so I never really had an issue getting it in

I tried a size 1 Diva cup as a teen (and again, recently), but never had luck with it. I'm planning on using a Diva disc this coming cycle and am optimistic though.

 

Making your own cloth pads sounds super bad ass, by the way. 

[kelico]

Tampons (with applicator) if I'm having a heavier flow. Or just a pantyliner type pad if I'm having a light one. My mom used tampons, so that is what I grew up using.

 

TMI: I used to have the heaviest periods and needed 5 "super plus" tampons to get through a day. No pads would be able to hold all that blood lol.

[Miss Grey]

Disposable pads. The thought of putting anything up there makes me feel dizzy and nauseous. 😰 Curious about the underwear, but I like being able to physically feel that there's protection there. 😅

[Guest]

10 hours ago, JustHere said:

I'm planning on using a Diva disc this coming cycle and am optimistic though.

 

Making your own cloth pads sounds super bad ass, by the way. 

Best of luck!

 

That was before I had a sewing machine , if you can believe it. I hand sewed them. They last a long time. I still have ones I bought in college almost 9 years ago and they are just showing signs of wear

[everywhere and nowhere]

1 hour ago, Cranston said:

That was before I had a sewing machine , if you can believe it. I hand sewed them. They last a long time.

I don't have a sewing machine and don't know how to use one. I sew everything by hand. Not that I do it a lot and not that I'm good at it, though.

[subpetrum]

10 hours ago, Miss Grey said:

Curious about the underwear, but I like being able to physically feel that there's protection there.

Period underwear does feel different than under wear with nothing, but different again from pads. So it would take some adjusting but perhaps not too much.
The main issue with period underwear for me is that it's much more difficult to replace during the day, and as someone with heavier bleeding that just doesn't work. I use period underwear for swimming though and that seems to go just fine!

both period underwear and reusuable pads seem to me like you're only supposed to use one in a day, and as mentioned that isn't really practical if you would need ~6 pads a day anyway. Also I find myself concerned that if I were to use either of those options, and leave them in the whole day, I'd make my weirdly regular end of period UTI a bigger problem.

[everywhere and nowhere]

On 4/8/2025 at 10:52 AM, Miss Grey said:

Curious about the underwear, but I like being able to physically feel that there's protection there. 😅

Me too. For this reason I also don't like "ultra thin" pads, I prefer those which are supposedly (I never really experienced it, but I've read about it) mocked by some tampon users as "adult diapers".

13 hours ago, subpetrum said:

The main issue with period underwear for me is that it's much more difficult to replace during the day, and as someone with heavier bleeding that just doesn't work. I use period underwear for swimming though and that seems to go just fine!

Swimming with period underwear?? And it doesn't leak?

I have quite heavy flow and I don't even cycle at least on days 2, 3 and usually 4. When the pad is pressed against my body by the seat, it means a high risk of leak. (On a daily basis and overnight, I need to prevent "back leaks" by... putting a bit of toilet paper between my buttocks. Using longer pads doesn't work, I tried it as a teenager and even "overnight" pads were too short. Although it may have somethign to do also with the fact that I've never been particularly skinny. ) And I haven't been swimming for a long time, it's so much hassle with going there and changing clothes... (Of course, I only changed my clothes in a closed cubicle, and what did you expect? ) But at least, now I can swim, because I bought a swimsuit with long sleeves and legs. Let's see how it works out in terms of being accepted by the pool attendants... it doesn't look like a burkini, has no hidjab or skirt (in fact, this was something I was anxious about for practical reasons - that the skirt might get torn off on waterslides, and giving up waterslides... oh no, please don't make me do it... ), but given the prevalence of islamophobia in Poland despite very small Muslim population, I can imagine any long-legged swimsuit being met with suspicion... (And in fact, my nudity aversion and resulting empathy is the reason why I absolutely take a pro-hidjab and pro-burkini stance in debates on whether such clothing should be allowed.) On the other hand... since the Water Park in Warsaw accepted topless swimming, it would be absolutely awful if they didn't accept the reverse and tried to bar women who prefer to cover up for health-related, asexuality-related or religious reasons from swimming there...

[subpetrum]

13 hours ago, everywhere and nowhere said:

And it doesn't leak?

 

not as far as I have noticed. to be fair most of the time I'm swimming outside and therefore wearing a wetsuit, but I have been to a public pool in the middle of my period and it seemed fine (I suspect my friends would have said something, if they noticed any leaking.)

for overnight I've mostly given up and just sleep with the longest pads I can find, and a towel underneath me. Then I wash the underwear by hand in the morning if needed. inefficient perhaps, but it works so far.

 

13 hours ago, everywhere and nowhere said:

I can imagine any long-legged swimsuit being met with suspicion

I find that whole thing bizarre, and although I don't think we have any rules banning burkinis where I live (always possible I've missed something though) I do remember being told that rashvests (or rashies as we denizens of the southern hemisphere call them) were not allowed, and neither were board shorts. I just want to swim without having to wear subject myself to clothing which is uncomfortable in multiple ways. Not only are the most one piece swimming costumes rather light on the coverage, they also do not really work if you don't have the right proportions (or are sensitive to tight clothing). Bleh. rant over. 

[Xaver]

I gave tampons a try as a teen so I could swim with my friends, couldn't get it in, cried, and swore off them since then.

 

Decided to give them a second try yesterday because I'm tired of disposable pads and figured it's time to try. Nope. Can't do it.

 

I want to give it one final shot, see if I can do some relaxation techniques or what-not and buy one of the mini brands. If I could get it to work, I think I'd really enjoy tampons. But at the same time I fall in the category of asexuals who are virgins and have left that body part untouched their entire lives. So I don't have high expectations.

 

I've thought about period underwear, but I think the germaphobe in me would overpower any comfort they bring. Maybe I could try them during those last few days when I just have a very light flow / spotting, and see from there.

[MinnieMouse]

I use disposable pads only. I’ve tried with tampons, but putting something up there is very uncomfortable for me. Due to being autistic I have some sensory issues and can’t use products I have to put inside my body. It’s not only tampons; it’s also contact lenses and ear plugs (I can only wear silicon plugs that I don’t have to put inside my ears.). 

[AhimsaRaven]

I don't have periods anymore (thank God for HRT), but when I did, I used menstrual cups. It helped with the dysphoria to be able to put it in and forget about it for 12 hours.

 

Though, I did have to use the softest and smallest one I could find. Even then, I had to cut off the entire stem so it would actually fit. It did take some time to learn how to use it and I still felt like all the menstrual cups I used were too big even at the "small" sizes. I've never been sexually active in my life or been to a gynecologist. I don't think I ever will either. I don't know if that was the reason why they didn't fit well, but it probably didn't help.

 

For the first couple of months on HRT, using the cup was very painful because of atrophy from HRT. I gave up at that point and used pads for months. I was so happy when my doctor increased my dose. Now, I don't have periods anymore.

 

I don't blame anyone for not using cups or insertable products. Nobody takes the bodies of people who have never been sexually active into account. The small sizes of menstrual cups aren't small enough in my experience.

[iff]

@JustHere

 

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iff,

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