xray45 Posted November 5, 2007 Share Posted November 5, 2007 Hello to all, I am 37 and asexual and many of the males I have been around have been controled or are controled by 3 things, food, sex and sleep. Granted I like food, and sleep and maybe sometime together if I can do it LOL but the whole sex thing throws me for a loop. I was working for an hvac company and the guys that worked there did nothing but talk about sex and were explicit at that. I just don't get it. Pink has a song where the lyrics talk about a guy that is going home alone and it will be just you and your hand tonight. She says in one part with a little bit of a vengeful attitude "well, your going home alone tonight aren't ya" Woman who aren't asexual not all woman but some know that men are driven by this and they have the "power" so to speak to "hold" out on men. Not me and other asexual men. That is why I say we are FREE! Free at last, good god almighty we're free at last! Anyway, anybody want to email or drop a line just send over an email. I just got yahoo messenger so I can use that too. Bored, need to talk to someone or to chat about anything drop I line I like talking to anyone. Thanks for letting me rant. Link to post Share on other sites
Tool1989 Posted November 5, 2007 Share Posted November 5, 2007 :twisted: YES WE ARE FREE!!!! MUHAHAHAHA :twisted: Link to post Share on other sites
M51 Posted November 5, 2007 Share Posted November 5, 2007 Free? Really? Is this a trick? Is there small print somewhere? Where's my free man? :lol: Congrats, guys. Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted November 6, 2007 Share Posted November 6, 2007 "I am 37 and asexual and many of the males I have been around have been controled or are controled by 3 things, food, sex and sleep." What? I thought money was important, too! "Granted I like food, and sleep and maybe sometime together if I can do it LOL but the whole sex thing throws me for a loop." Yeah, and I'm sure asexual people sleep a lot better with fewer worries. "I was working for an hvac company and the guys that worked there did nothing but talk about sex and were explicit at that. I just don't get it." Women talk filthy too, and then they look at me 'cause I don't seem fascinated by all their bragging... they need to wash their mouths out with soap -- antibacterial soap, to be specific. "Woman who aren't asexual not all woman but some know that men are driven by this and they have the "power" so to speak to "hold" out on men." No, dude. They only think they have power over men. They are delusional to think they can control men through sex. Men do that stuff with women, too. They try to manipulate yah... they say, "What? You got no one to take care of yah?" Yeah, right. I say, get lost, and they are then soooo confused. "Not me and other asexual men. That is why I say we are FREE! Free at last, good god almighty we're free at last!" Well, us asexual women are free too. No snot nosed brats, no nagging husbands yelling to get them a beer and demanding how much you spent... "Bored, need to talk to someone or to chat about anything drop I line I like talking to anyone." Well, that's why they invented the internet. Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted November 6, 2007 Share Posted November 6, 2007 37 is OLD??!!!??????????? Come on. :shock: Who are all these kids posting on Older Asexuals? Link to post Share on other sites
Ziffler Posted November 8, 2007 Share Posted November 8, 2007 Free?????? I had to think about this one. I understand what you are saying, and in that vein yes i am free from sexual attraction, which makes me asexual, but unfortunately I am not free from the sex drive. I am not impotent. I am and always have been a very healthy male. So yes, I am free to live my life as I desire without the burden of a sexual partner or any partner for that matter. So I have been able to travel and get jobs, leave jobs, get new jobs and go and do pretty much whatever I wanted when I want to do it. I have had and am having a wonderful life. But like I said up above, being asexual didn't take away my sex drive, so I had to learn to handle that little problem of a very healthy sex drive and no focal point for it. That took a couple decades. So I am free now, but I sure didn't start out free. I had my problems and burdens just like everyone else has. It takes time accepting oneself, loving oneself and learning to enjoy the life you have and not the one in your fantasies. So in the spirit of your post, Yes it is great to be free. Link to post Share on other sites
Crazy_Badge_lady Posted June 9, 2008 Share Posted June 9, 2008 edited. Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 10, 2008 Share Posted June 10, 2008 I get the impression from listening to other women talk that some women think that "sex is power" but this is only an illusion. Even if a lot of men are driven by sex, sex holds no real power, because if someone denies him sex, he can just go find someone else. Most of the women I know who act like this have crappy jobs & no education, so they need some kind of "power" to hold onto and give them an identity of some kind -- I listen to them talk trash and brag -- and I realize they're not even pretty -- some of these girls, their own boyfriends ask me to go home with them -- and I say, "What? Aren't you with so and so?" "Yeah. But you're better lookin' than her. Come on, she'll never know!" "Get lost." And yah know what? I don't tell them that their boyfriend, whom they believe they control through sex, was coming on to me. I let them believe in their own fairy tales. Women with college degrees & decent jobs don't usually play these games, though. Sometimes, but not as often as the ones making minimum wage. Probably because they have better things to do with their life. Link to post Share on other sites
jcortese Posted June 10, 2008 Share Posted June 10, 2008 I get the impression from listening to other women talk that some women think that "sex is power" but this is only an illusion. WORD WORD WORD. When it comes to sexual males (like most of them), pussy is pussy is pussy and one is as good as another. They control nothing -- and besides, what good does it do? Does it really get anyone anything they want? Like oh, equal pay? Hell, no. It's a denial thing -- women are told they're nothing but sex, so they're going to stick their fingers in their ears and pretend to themselves that it's some sort of empowering thing when it's just a giant crock of shit. If it were really empowering and REALLY gave women the ability to control men, the pay gap'd be in our favor, rape would be unheard of, and the entire government would be female. Power my cynical ass. It's a denial ploy by brainwashed women and a resentful tantrum by men who want every pussy they see and feel infuriated that there are actual people attached to them that they have to pretend to care about in order to gain access. Things like this are why I'm glad I'm hyposexual, because I have NO reason to bullshit myself about this and can just call it like I see it. Most women turn themselves in knots to avoid coming to this very simple conclusion. For us, we can be as unstinting and uncompromising when expressing our opinions about this as we are about election rigging, environmental devastation, and corporate corruption. Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 10, 2008 Share Posted June 10, 2008 Well, Jcortese, I guess I'm cynical too, then, because I can see where you're coming from. I'm asexual, so I never felt that way about myself. I know I'm pretty, but I know the only power I have is the fact that I can work 2 jobs to support myself & pay my own bills & don't need to leach off anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
< retired > Posted June 11, 2008 Share Posted June 11, 2008 Power my cynical ass. It's a denial ploy by brainwashed women and a resentful tantrum by men who want every pussy they see and feel infuriated that there are actual people attached to them that they have to pretend to care about in order to gain access. This diatribe reminded me of a quote I stored in my database a long time ago. It's from an earlier edition of the following book: http://www.amazon.com/Measure-Woman-Gene-G...1385&sr=1-1 I'm not carrying any form of the Christian meme complex, but both my sisters are fundies so I'm regularly exposed to Christian literature. I have no idea whether the following quote is still in the most recent edition of the book, but here it is for your amusement: The Bible teaches that man is to be the stronger, the leader, the one in charge and in control. Woman is to be in submission, in a position offering respect and honor. But underneath it all, God did not take away from woman the ultimate power over man -- sex. (shaking my head in amazement...) :blink: Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 "The Bible teaches that man is to be the stronger, the leader, the one in charge and in control. Woman is to be in submission, in a position offering respect and honor. But underneath it all, God did not take away from woman the ultimate power over man -- sex." WTF? Oh give me a break. I'm so glad I'm not a fundy. Link to post Share on other sites
jcortese Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 "The Bible teaches that man is to be the stronger, the leader, the one in charge and in control. Woman is to be in submission, in a position offering respect and honor. But underneath it all, God did not take away from woman the ultimate power over man -- sex." WTF? Oh give me a break. I'm so glad I'm not a fundy. I'm so glad I'm not a sexual ... No matter how unpopular this attitude may be, I still believe that, deep down, this is how they all think, not just the fundies. Some of them feel guilty about it, some resentful, some in denial, some like it. But they all think this, deep down. Link to post Share on other sites
Tanwen Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 But the Bible also says that slaves should obey their master. Tan Link to post Share on other sites
jcortese Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 But the Bible also says that slaves should obey their master. Tan Yup. The bible, like all books written by humans, says a lot of dumb shit. Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 "I'm so glad I'm not a sexual ... No matter how unpopular this attitude may be, I still believe that, deep down, this is how they all think, not just the fundies. Some of them feel guilty about it, some resentful, some in denial, some like it. But they all think this, deep down." Maybe they don't all think that way... but I'd bet a lot of them sure do! Sad, ain't it? Link to post Share on other sites
AllyCat Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 I'm so glad I'm not a sexual ... No matter how unpopular this attitude may be, I still believe that, deep down, this is how they all think, not just the fundies. Some of them feel guilty about it, some resentful, some in denial, some like it. But they all think this, deep down. Well, I can't prove I don't believe something, but I will say I'm sick of people assuming that sexual attraction to men is the same as wanting men to dominate you. I'm especially sick of hearing it from heterosexual men. But really, I'd just as soon not hear it from anyone, ever again. I don't have any delusion that my sexuality is a substitute for real power. I wish other people would get over the delusion that female sexuality is incompatible with wanting power. If it ever comes down to a choice between my dignity and a sex partner... well, I've got two perfectly functional hands. Link to post Share on other sites
KAGU143 Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 Sexist comments of any kind are not endorsed by AVEN as a whole, and are the sole responsibility of the poster, or posters. Don't take it personally, AC. It's just venting ... I hope. -GB Link to post Share on other sites
isillote Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 I'm so glad I'm not a sexual ... No matter how unpopular this attitude may be, I still believe that, deep down, this is how they all think, not just the fundies. Some of them feel guilty about it, some resentful, some in denial, some like it. But they all think this, deep down. I have to say that as an asexual with a highly sexual partner, and having a lot of sexual friends of both sexes, I don't find this to be the case. Yes, there are men who think that way, but in my experience a hell of a lot of them don't, and treat their female partners and friends with respect. My partner treats me with the utmost respect, as I do him - we are equals. I wouldn't be with him otherwise. I do feel a great freedom in being asexual, though, especially when I see the number of women (and men) who stay with their partners because the sex is good, even though every other aspect of their relationship is crap, or who go from one bad relationship to another, because they can't do without sex for any length of time. That will never happen to me. I've made some bad relationship choices in my time, but none of them were sex-driven. Link to post Share on other sites
AllyCat Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 Sexist comments of any kind are not endorsed by AVEN as a whole, and are the sole responsibility of the poster, or posters.Don't take it personally, AC. It's just venting ... I hope. -GB I appreciate that, Greybird. I can definitely be a bit of a hothead about this stuff too. Link to post Share on other sites
< retired > Posted June 14, 2008 Share Posted June 14, 2008 I'm so glad I'm not a sexual ... No matter how unpopular this attitude may be, I still believe that, deep down, this is how they all think, not just the fundies. I'm sure that there are a large number of sexual men who view women as little more than a means of sexual gratification; however, it's quite a leap to say that all sexual men are like this. So, what percentage are enlightened? 1%? 5%? 10%? Don't know... Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 "Sexist comments of any kind are not endorsed by AVEN as a whole." This is true... "I don't have any delusion that my sexuality is a substitute for real power." I don't feel that sex is power, and you don't feel that sex is power, but yah know what? A lot of other people in the world do feel that sex is power. Probably because they don't have much else that belongs to them. They don't have a PhD. They don't have a good job. They don't have a nice car. They don't have a lot of money... But oh yes, they say to themselves, I have boobs! All those educated people with nice cars and good jobs are jealous of ME!!! Because I have big boobs and I'm soooo hot! So they go and they put down the educated women who have careers and make fun of them and call them skinny and stuff... so, who's really jealous? I mean, do they have low self esteem and figure sex is the only thing they've got, so they're going to use it any way they can... I know people like that, unfortunately. Poor-poor Thylacine. She's got a college education, and a nice car, and a good job, and money in the bank, but I feel sorry for her, because she's not as hot as I am!!! I make five bucks and hour, and live in a dump, but I've got a great body! So they're compensating with sex. That's how I see it. People are free to disagree with me if they want to. Now, I'm not saying every sexual person is like that, just some of them -- heck, a good percentage. And men do it too. They go to me, look at me, baby, aren't I hot? Well, sheesh, if you're hot, see a doctor, you might have a fever. Link to post Share on other sites
SlightlyMetaphysical Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 I'm sure that there are a large number of sexual men who view women as little more than a means of sexual gratification; however, it's quite a leap to say that all sexual men are like this. So, what percentage are enlightened? 1%? 5%? 10%? Don't know... So 10%'s your highest offer? I wouldn't have been surprised if I found out it was as high as 70%. Maybe I'm just out of touch with men, but almost every single one of the guys at school has good non-sexual relationships with at least a few girls. And that's not counting family members, teachers, etc. So, in a certain context, some men might objectify girls. I think it makes it easier to use them, somehow. But it can't be anywhere near 90%. Can it? Link to post Share on other sites
< retired > Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 I wouldn't have been surprised if I found out it was as high as 70%. ... But it can't be anywhere near 90%. Can it? It might be a generational thing. My generation and the one before may have a large number of men with antiquated attitudes. The latest generation may be a bit more progressive. Of course, this is all just speculation and we have to deal with the world as it is. Link to post Share on other sites
KAGU143 Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 A lot of other people in the world do feel that sex is power. Probably because they don't have much else that belongs to them. They don't have a PhD. They don't have a good job. They don't have a nice car. They don't have a lot of money... But oh yes, they say to themselves, I have boobs! All those educated people with nice cars and good jobs are jealous of ME!!! Because I have big boobs and I'm soooo hot! So they go and they put down the educated women who have careers and make fun of them and call them skinny and stuff... so, who's really jealous? I mean, do they have low self esteem and figure sex is the only thing they've got, so they're going to use it any way they can... I know people like that, unfortunately. Poor-poor Thylacine. She's got a college education, and a nice car, and a good job, and money in the bank, but I feel sorry for her, because she's not as hot as I am!!! I make five bucks and hour, and live in a dump, but I've got a great body! So they're compensating with sex. That's how I see it. People are free to disagree with me if they want to. Now, I'm not saying every sexual person is like that, just some of them -- heck, a good percentage. And men do it too. They go to me, look at me, baby, aren't I hot? Well, sheesh, if you're hot, see a doctor, you might have a fever. This is a horrible sexist stereotype to be openly promoting, especially for a person who takes such exception when negative, sexist stereotypes about women are promoted by OTHER users. People who believe stereotypes base their beliefs on personal experiences which seem to validate them, but that does not make them true. 'Just saying ... -GB Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Now I did not say ALL sexual people were like that, did I??? I said a "good percentage." And well, yes, I have had experiences with people like that. It always seems like it's the low wage low education person who goes on about "I'm so sexy!" and I feel like, 'shut up and go back to school and do something with your life, will yah!' Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Well, I'm a low-wage person -- right now I'm living on Social Security, which is fairly appropriate since I'm 67. But when I was raising two kids alone, I also made a low wage, because I don't have a college degree, and having two kids makes it a little hard to be gone at night to go to school. I now have the first new car in my life, and several years ago I got the first dishwasher I've ever had at the age of 65. I still fill it, turn it on, and listen lovingly to it -- just love the sound! Maybe you can't count me, thylacine, because I know now I'm asexual. But even when I didn't know that, even when I was in first a marriage and then a longterm affair, I didn't envy or feel jealous of women with degrees or a lot of money or great cars. I certainly didn't flaunt my body and use it as a prop to my self-esteem. I don't know where you get your statistical sample, but it doesn't really comport with what I've seen, and I worked for 40+ years with other office support types who would definitely have been the "enviers" you're talking about, because they didn't have any more $$/status/education than I did. I also now do volunteer work with low-income people, and I don't see the rampant, vicious envy you're talking about among low-income women. They're just basically trying to support themselves in an increasingly hard world. I think you're a little hard on low-wage workers. We do what we can with what we have, and I think we're all pretty amazing at how well we do. Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Well... I''m sorry if I sounded like a jerk, without meaning to. I really did not intend to put down any income level or make anyone feel bad. My statistical sample is from working among people who acted like that, and who made me nuts Mon-Fri, 9-5, and I did most of the work, their work and mine, while they carried on, arguing with their significant others for two hours on the phone when they were supposed to be working, gossiping, taking two hour cigarette breaks, arguing with customers, talking back to the boss, etc. The boss gave me a raise & a promotion partly because I had an education, but also because I did actual "work" while I was there... I recall this one who wore very short tight shorts & revealing tops, and who's bf was in a motorcycle gang (no kidding) and we had these important clients coming -- the manager said, "I want YOU at the reception desk when they are scheduled to arrive. I do not want her to be visible when they come in!" I did not repeat this to anyone, naturally... Then there was this other one in the office who would take off her blouse and have nothing on top but her black lacy bra and when the other manager would walk by, "Oh, it's sooooo hot in here!" The men in the warehouse had awful language too, and talked very crude. One day I just had enough and quit to finish getting my bachelor's. I had an associate's, and was going nights for my bachelor's... I says, you know what, I do NOT belong in this place!!! So that experience had an impact about how I see stuff, I guess. But lookit, it is never my intention to make anyone feel bad, okay? You raised your kids on your own, and so did my mother. I admire you and anyone else who does that. Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Thanks -- I can see how that situation pissed you off, shall we say. I actually had the same experience with a woman lawyer I worked for, so bad behavior occurs at all $$/educational levels. And I quit; she stayed. I'm not sure who did her work for her after I quit. Link to post Share on other sites
thylacine Posted June 15, 2008 Share Posted June 15, 2008 Yeah... I'm basically a nice, but slightly opinionated, type of person. I actually mean well... Anyway, I do not make "big bucks." Just a pretty average income. I just happened to have a better job than those birds... and like I said, I did my work, and their work too, while they got into cat fights and talked on the phone all day long. Wearing skimpy clothes didn't get them a better salary, so they didn't like me very much! I did more work, so I got a raise. But I left because I could not stand it anymore... it's like they resented the fact that I did the work, did the work properly, and had integrity. It's what made me want to get my bachelor's. Anyway, right now I have 2 jobs to make ends meet since things are so darned expensive these days... Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.