Who is your ideal life partner?

[Monke Jimmy]

I don't think I've seen a topic about this?

 

Platonic, romantic, etc., I don't care. What kind of long-term partner(s) are you looking for, or who have you found? Is it more than one person? What else can you tell me about what you expect to find in a partner?

I'm thinking more about positive attributes rather than dealbreakers. I'll post my own response below. 

[Monke Jimmy]

I was thinking that in order to find a romantic partner I would need to find someone who takes things slow (it takes me a while to develop feelings) and is okay with being celibate, but still likes cuddling. I'd also prefer a partner who isn't a jerk, but I feel like that goes without saying. I'd prefer someone with confidence and good humor, but I feel like I've set the bar high enough. 

I basically want a BFF+ to spend time with. How about y'all?

[AspieAlly613]

*Looks at title....looks at first post*

 

Oh, so we're not naming names.  Okay, then.

[iff]

Someone to go to gigs with, read books with, stops me from eating a bag of haribo in one sitting, and can complete all my half finished crosswords

Edited Friday at 06:34 PM by iff

[Monke Jimmy]

24 minutes ago, AspieAlly613 said:

Oh, so we're not naming names.  Okay, then.

Kathy. 

I don't currently know a Kathy, but that's what I'm going with. 

[Pomelord.]

Someone who has an opinion when asked whether they would prefer A or B.
Someone who is more politically left than conservative.
Someone who thinks sitting in the same room doing different things is a great way to spend time together 😋
Someone who understands my need for a lot of alone time.
Someone who doesn't want to have sex with me.
Preferably someone smart.

I know why I'm single, but that's fine 😄 I like being single, it's really uncomplicated and I have my close friends.

[Pomelord.]

5 minutes ago, Monke Jimmy said:

Kathy. 

I don't currently know a Kathy, but that's what I'm going with. 

Oooh, I'm going with Alex. That was my favorite name throughout my entire childhood and I always wanted a boyfriend named Alex back then 😄

[bare_trees]

If Admiral Janeway and Captain Burnham are taken, then my actual partner 😂

[RoseCreator]

Hmmm

probably someone who is okay with my feelings shifting day to day, as I’m aroflux. Someone who can handle sensitivities

 

someone who can also take care of me- I’m typically caring for others, and I wouldn’t really want that in a relationship.

and someone who is up for someone who is really affectionate

 

i’m only really romantically/queer-platonically attracted to more masculine people tho

[Snao Cone]

My right hand.

 

(sort of kidding) 

[Still]

They'd understand all my weird niche interests and put up with my weird habits. What I'm trying to say is they don't exist.

[Zhorin]

I fell in love with my best friend @StarryNightAllAlone. She's a wonderfully beautiful person. She's compassionate, kind, intelligent, understanding, delightfully weird, sensitive, and strong. Our personalities fit together nicely - we have good chemistry. We want the same things in life. We're helping each other heal from our pasts. We encourage and inspire each other to accomplish our goals and to be our best selves. Being with her feels like home. She's my soulmate.

[weird elf]

2 hours ago, Pomelord. said:

Someone who has an opinion when asked whether they would prefer A or B.
Someone who is more politically left than conservative.
Someone who thinks sitting in the same room doing different things is a great way to spend time together 😋
Someone who understands my need for a lot of alone time.
Someone who doesn't want to have sex with me.
Preferably someone smart.

I know why I'm single, but that's fine 😄

That sounds 100% reasonable to me though.

[StarryNightAllAlone]

My best friend and my boyfriend, @Zhorin.

[DemonicEnby]

Well. Complicated. I have someone in mind, but am not sure if it would really fit that well. But would be a definite option, strangely enough my bestie pointed out something that might have clued my in to the whole graysexual thing a lot earlier. 

 

Or my bestie, like qpr style. We shared flats a couple of times a few years ago, that would work perfectly as well. 

[Sally]

My kitty.

[Ceebs]

A grumpy Englishman who's actually not that grumpy but is quite sappy and a massive dork/nerd and who loves lots of the same music I do and has a pleasingly compatible sense of humour and makes me feel safe and understood and gives really good hugs and is also my best friend I can tell absolutely anything.

 

I wonder where I could find one of those.

[Blue eyes white dragon]

Ahem, @TormentDubz

 

In other words, a dorky emo smart ace curly haired music producer that likes Buicks and Caroline reaper pepper from Kansas City Missouri 

[Gloomy]

My sexy ninja husbando.

[Artemis42]

Someone who

Is progressive and non-religious like me.

Is either already educated on blindness and disability or who is enthusiastic to learn about it, and won’t feel freaked out about my disability and will accommodate me while also treating it as a normal thing.

Is content with rarely or never having sex with me.

Likes animals.

Either has interests similar to mine, or happily supports my passions and shows curiosity about them regardless.

Has passions of their own whether they’re similar to mine or not.

Doesn’t want children.

Loves cuddles and physical affection but also knows the importance of personal space and alone time, bonus if they’re an introvert like me.

Is easy to talk to about any subject, from silly to personal or existential.

Is emotionally intelligent and expressive.

Shares my sense of humour.

I’ve gone on long enough.

Now if only I could find this person.

 

[Eutierria]

This is how my brain wanted to answer - 

 

 

The life partner 
I wish to seek 
Contains galaxies 
Within the words they speak 

 

Their depth of thought
Critically analyse with skill 
A man of substance 
With a twinkle of thrill 

 

Won't make a promise 
If he cannot keep
Care and love 
Rooted deep 

 

Affection, attention
And all the bear hugs 
The boops and the bops
Spooning in love 

 

Kisses on noses
Cheeks and on lips 
Foreheads joined
Dancing hip to hip

 

Respect for each other 
Support where we can 
Tell me dear reader
Where? Where to find this man ? 
 

[Monke Jimmy]

56 minutes ago, Sally said:

My kitty.

A very good answer. 

I take it all back I just want a puppy now. 

[168527]

Nothing here.

[chris_error]

Someone who lets me be myself wholeheartedly. Someone who lets me have my alone time. Someone who actively cares about how I feel. Someone I can be physically affectionate with, like cuddles and hugs. It’s a bonus if he’s tall. I also think it’d be nice if he’s more outdoorsy and outgoing than me. Romantic, qpr, or alterous relationship would all be just as good to me.

[Sister Mercurial]

I don't know.  Victor makes me feel things that lead me to wonder if this is what people mean when they talk about chemistry, plus he and I have some important values in common (politics, music, not wanting kids).  His lifestyle is very different from mine in some respects, so we'd have to have a LDR, but if that means a relationship with very little housework, then I can see advantages to it.  And he is incredibly handsome.  Given that I have absolutely no relationship experience and don't know how I'd react to being in one, maybe it'd work out, maybe it wouldn't, but if he's single in the future, I think I'd take that risk and see how it turned out.  Which is something I never thought I'd say, or I wouldn't have joined this forum.  

[Epitaph]

8 hours ago, Snao Cone said:

My right hand.

 

(sort of kidding) 

[Snao Cone]

Just now, Epitaph said:

That's a left hand.

[Epitaph]

9 minutes ago, Snao Cone said:

That's a left hand.

[hewhomainsness]

me

[Epitaph]

I did find who I assumed could have been a life partner. But she's gone and been gone for a long time now. Who can really say if we would have worked. Maybe I or she would have changed too much. Maybe I stagnate and progressive chemistry ended.

 

Truth is, I don't think I know anymore. I gravitate towards people with dark things in them and dark things in their past. It's my innate need to fix and comfort. but that's no way to found a relationship. I've a broken and warped sex drive that goes from inactive to overactive. Ideally I'd like somebody who could role with that. But at the same time, I'm so much of a wreck physically that I'd settle for just sleeping on a couch arm in arm.

 

They'd want to explore and see new things, try new things, but be homey at the same time. Ideally, they'd need to be somebody who could roll with having some money, or none, because jobs for somebody like me are few and far out here, and I'm the kind of person who will build their house out of salvaged parts, fix everything they can, or make what they need if they can.

 

I watch any form of media, I like discussions that go anywhere, I don't give a shit about politics and I don't take sides unless another human's life is at stake or somebody is being treated unfairly. I'm insane enough to live with very little both because I hate the system we live in and because I'm a person who fell through the cracks thanks to their life choices.

 

I guess, a better way to say it would be to describe who I knew, and somebody I knew recently. They went through a lot of shit and carry a lot of shit. It gives them a gravity of understanding and realness about life that seems rare in people. But they aren't so overburdened as to wallow in misery or pain. They're cheerful, happy, they know how to be happy. They're thoughtful and observant, and they've got the courage to do what's gotta get done both in their life or for others around them. Not afraid to get their hands dirty, not afraid to try things and fail. They've got a sharp edge to them but they aren't malicious. They know the value of life around them and they let everything living coexist as best they can.

 

I think that's the ideal I once had. And a person I knew once. Question is whether or not it was actually ideal. Not where I live, and not the way I live. The two don't mix together. Maybe the ideal always was nothing more than just a fantasy of wishful thinking based so far off reality that it'll forever remain as concept so long as I remain the embodiment of no-man's land.