Aegoromantic-ish romantic attraction or alterous attraction?

[krmnlg]

I cant tell if im greyromantic or aromantic w/ alterous attraction.

 

I basically wanted to be their #1 fav person, but not in a romantic way, I guess. Looking back, a QPR would have been better. I just didnt had the word for it back then. But I did had romantic fantasies abt them, but I always changed the appearance of "me" into the appearance of a character I knew on TV. As well w/ my "crush's" appearance. When I actually imagined myself and them, it became really repulsive even in just a "in theory" setting. It felt wrong. I just couldnt picture it anymore. All the activities became strictly platonic/queerplatonic. I also didnt experienced sensual/aesthetic or sexual attraction towards them.

 

I only knew them online and I guess that made it easier to develop this type of attraction as I never had to worry abt becoming a real thing because 1) I wouldnt be able to date them IRL 2) they didnt liked me back. So yea, the moment is became too realistic, it felt weird. 

 

Is this some weird aegoromantic romantic attraction (not being able to picture my actual self in the fantasy while it still being romo attraction) or just alterous?

 

Ive had a squish before and it definitely feels more "overwhelming" than that. Thats why I suspect its either romantic or alterous.

 

(Also, pls dont comment things like "you dont need to label it" cuz those arent reallg helpful to me🙂)

[Solri]

From what I found, maybe you can look into these two as well?

 

Frayromantic: when your feelings for someone disappear once you know them (like the opposite of demiromantic)

 

Lithromantic: when you like someone without the need or desire for it to be reciprocated. 

 

(These are just a quick google search on their meanings, I suggest you learn more about them)

 

Aegoromantic, from the words online, is when when you like the idea of romance but don't desire to participate in it's activities. A way I understand it is: you like the idea of holding hands, however, you don't have someone you want to hold hands with. Even if they're a nice person, you don't really care, or want to hold hands. 

 

It's the same thing but with romance. 

 

Lithromantic can sound similar, but I find the difference to be that Lithromantic is liking a person, but not having the desire to be with them. 

 

Hopefully this helps at least a bit!